topic Re: FROM SHANUS in Among Friends

FROM SHANUS

Shanus — Thu, 20 Dec 2018 13:59:56 GMT

Thank you everyone for your prayers and support. I spoke to Mom yesterday...having a “good” day among mostly bad ones. She told me I sounded tired and should schedule a spa day and charge it to her. Now isn’t that just like a mother?...Thinking of MY needs at this time.

I’m trying to keep the home front as normal as possible with all the stress around me....getting to the gym early (was there at 5:30 today) and yoga in the afternoons....then comes all the calls from Mom’s caregivers, Hospice and replies from the nursing homes that were left messages late yesterday. DS, DIL and DD (3 hr. time difference in WA) are helping, but sometimes too many hands stirring the soup causes more confusion, especially contacting the same nurse, getting calls returned, etc. The left hand doesn’t know what the right is doing. I’ve asked that I make the calls and have a family meeting this weekend w/ findings and make one decision. Of course, their support is beyond measure.

When Mom’s more awake, she’s having her caregivers write checks to pay bills and she’s signing as they pass them under her nose...Uh, no! I’m double checking the account online (joint acct. w/ her), but will pay any accumulated bills on Saturday’s visit and take checkbook with me.

She asked me, last visit, to clear out and close her safe deposit box. Oy vey! More jewelry. Lol. Many pieces are too big for granddaughters and DD and DIL not interested. Will sell to CIRCA as I’ve done before. Anyone deal w/ them? Wonderful to deal with for estate pieces, buy gold and finished pieces....many offices listed online. The usual me giving info. about jewelry. 😜

So after another cup of Joe, my busy day begins. I did want to check in and let ya’ll know I’m touched by your heartfelt prayers.

Love to each of you.

Shanus

Re: FROM SHANUS

Bird mama — Thu, 20 Dec 2018 14:14:14 GMT

@Shanus I continue to keep your mother and you in my prayers.

Re: FROM SHANUS

Greeneyedlady21 — Thu, 20 Dec 2018 14:19:41 GMT

@Shanus You are very fortunate to have a good support system in this very difficult time. I don't have that so I know how important it is. I loved my Mom so much and miss her beyond words. She was one tough woman and it sounds like your Mom is too.

Re: FROM SHANUS

happycat — Thu, 20 Dec 2018 14:21:13 GMT

Praying for you and your mom, @Shanus. It is sweet that she wanted you to have a spa day. Yes, just like a mother.

I know you are probaby mentally exhausted, glad you are taking care of yourself. I'm praying you and your mom have a nice visit on Saturday.

Re: FROM SHANUS

kelshar — Thu, 20 Dec 2018 14:23:30 GMT

Shanus - i'll be thinking of your mother. I'm really impressed that you're also taking care of you. There's so many other people in your situation that neglect themselves and that's actually the worst thing a person can do because that's not good for the person they're taking care of either. God Bless and take care.

Re: FROM SHANUS

CAcableGirl2 — Thu, 20 Dec 2018 15:05:43 GMT

@Shanus Sounds like your Mom knows best! Yes, be sure to take care of yourself, it is important for you to be well during this very difficult time.

I would wait on selling all the jewelry. Your Grandchildren may decide that they would like a piece of jewelry from their great Grandmother at some point, maybe when they graduate or get married.

I lost my wonderful Grandmother many, many years ago, and wish I had something from her that could be passed down to my grandchildren when they are old enough since it would be something from their great, great Grandmother that they never had a chance to meet. .

Re: FROM SHANUS

wvumountiefan — Thu, 20 Dec 2018 15:21:18 GMT

@Shanus I’m thinking of you. Even though I only know you on these forums, I always read your recs and responses because you are so knowledgeable with all things beauty. I pray that God gives you and your family strength and comfort! ❤️😕

Re: FROM SHANUS

wonderfulworld — Thu, 20 Dec 2018 15:42:49 GMT

Let me add my thoughts and prayers, not an easy time at the best of time and especially difficult during the holiday season!

When I was walking a mile in your moccasins a Cardiologist said something to me I always remember. He said 'there is a natural end to all life on earth and we cannot 'cure' it and should not try to interfere and attempt to prolong a life that is coming to a natural end'. Like you, we turned to Hospice and accepted the inevitable.

One of my dear friends mother was dying of CHF and her brother was on the phone trying to get her a heart/lung transplant. She was well into her 80's and died 24 hours later. Created all sorts of additional grief in his reluctance to let his Mom go.

Re: FROM SHANUS

Cakers3 — Thu, 20 Dec 2018 15:46:43 GMT

Re: FROM SHANUS

Kachina624 — Thu, 20 Dec 2018 16:18:10 GMT

@Shanus. My thoughts are with you during this extremely sad time. It's very difficult to lose this person who has been so important in your life in a million ways.

I lost my mom in 2003, but there isn't a day that passes without me thinking of something I'd like to tell her; some things just juicy gossip, some things which would have made her happy or proud, other things sad. I'm sure you'll have the same experience.

Please know that there are many of us thinking of you and your mom.

Re: FROM SHANUS

golding76 — Thu, 20 Dec 2018 16:23:42 GMT

Shanus,

Love that today's rhythm is strong and positive. We know that there are ups and downs for your mother as well as you, but a positive swing is always welcome, isn't it?

Stay "Shanus Strong," if I dare to overuse the encouraging cry of our times.

Re: FROM SHANUS

Isobel Archer — Thu, 20 Dec 2018 16:31:49 GMT

Praying for you and your family during this stressful time.

Re: FROM SHANUS

Oostende — Thu, 20 Dec 2018 17:08:18 GMT

I'm another who will keep you and your mother in my prayers.

Re: FROM SHANUS

cherry — Thu, 20 Dec 2018 17:56:16 GMT

One day at a time @Shanus . Don't try to make everything a priority, pace yourself

Re: FROM SHANUS

Newgate — Thu, 20 Dec 2018 18:22:15 GMT

God bless you Shanus! Sending a prayer up for you right now!

Re: FROM SHANUS

Coquille — Thu, 20 Dec 2018 19:09:18 GMT

@Shanus Your mom is some LADY. Thinking of you and your well being, at this time. From our conversations, your mother must be a very special lady to have raised such a wonderful, caring and thoughtful person as you. She can take take a lot of credit and nachas just in that alone (aside from everythingl else).

Mom is right to ask you to take care of yourself. You're no good to her if you are run down. It seems that everyone is pitching in but you're at the helm. Take advantage of their help, be by your mother's side and do something for yourself (for your health) everyday, even if it's sitting down for a few minutes and having a cup of tea, coffee whatever centers you.

My prayers are with your mother, you and your family. Your family is lucky to have your mother and especially you!❤️️

Re: FROM SHANUS

depglass — Thu, 20 Dec 2018 19:22:13 GMT

Keeping you in my prayers today.

Re: FROM SHANUS

vsm — Thu, 20 Dec 2018 19:22:44 GMT

@Shanus Sounds like you're feeling a bit less overwhelmed, Shanus, and that's good to hear. As hard as this is, you're keeping your wits about you and organizing, one step at a time. You're inspiring me, as I'm trying to do the same right now with my Dad. Let's hang in there...

Re: FROM SHANUS

Coquille — Thu, 20 Dec 2018 19:33:38 GMT

@vsm Sorry to here about your dad. You take care of dad and yourself! My prayers are with you.

Re: FROM SHANUS

BirkiLady — Fri, 21 Dec 2018 03:08:54 GMT

@Shanus Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers. Yes, your mom is behaving just like a typical mom always does. She's looking after her children. Isn't that sweet? My mom did the same thing. Those memories remain at the surface 18 months later. Warm hugs to both of you.

ETA: Go through her jewelry carefully. You may have pieces to save for other family members later. If you still are interested in selling, I'll provide you with the place in Seattle, WA that I've used to sell estate jewelry (even though I'm in Nebraska). They are reputable and have an outstanding clientele. Please don't rush into disposing of them while so much is happening in your lives. Blessings.