topic Re: When You walk into someone's home for the first time.... in Among Friends

When You walk into someone's home for the first time....

SeaMaiden — Wed, 27 Jun 2018 15:37:18 GMT

What is it you notice that needs to be fixed or cleaned or..... In other words...

I have company coming to visit ( have not had anyone in my home as company for 25 years to visit) and I just want to know what I need to de clutter and clean the most.

I know people are very judgemental and usually THINK TO THEM SELVES how disgusting someone elses house mess is....

They will only be in the front room upstairs area... ( not bedrooms and such)

They will use the guest bathroom down stairs if need be( not our personal bathrooms)

They will only be visiting for a few hours( not over night.)

I would sure like to know besides just CLEANING REAL GOOD..... and having the place SMELL good.... What else I should worry about. I do not have a fancy decorated updated home. It is just comfortable for us. That is all I care about. But with company( people I do not really know at all) I feel that I am going to be judged.

I hate having visitors..... but I have no choice in the matter this time.

Thanks so much! I have a lot of anxiety over this and they are not going to be here until July 9th.

Re: When You walk into someone's home for the first time....

Lisa Y — Wed, 27 Jun 2018 15:47:43 GMT

@SeaMaiden Hi SeaMaiden. Having company is usually anxiety provoking for me as well. It does force me to clean up our everyday messes. The first thing I notice in someone's house is clutter, especially if there is a lot of it. Not everything needs to be put away. As I say to my husband, "This isn't a museum, we live here. The house has a lived in look to it." My kitchen is the dumping ground for everything: Mail, keys, papers, etc. If your kitchen and bathrooms are decluttered, that is what counts, IMHO. Remember, most people's houses don't look perfect. Enjoy your company, that is what's important.

Re: When You walk into someone's home for the first time....

Desertdi — Wed, 27 Jun 2018 15:48:03 GMT

I would just dust and vacuum a little, and not make any major changes. It's YOUR HOME.....not theirs.

Re: When You walk into someone's home for the first time....

Hooty — Wed, 27 Jun 2018 15:48:45 GMT

@SeaMaiden, I understand you being so anxious about this, I am the same way, I am sure your home is just fine and just needs a little cleaning, try not to worry too much!

Re: When You walk into someone's home for the first time....

game-on — Wed, 27 Jun 2018 15:51:08 GMT

@SeaMaiden.....I suggest that you take a few deep breaths and realize that the judgment is theirs.... the home is yours. If you are happy there, then that is what matters. A welcoming attitude is the most important thing, IMO.

Others look at our home.... however, they may just be curious. I know when I visit someone's home I want to learn more about the person, to see how they decorate. I consider being a guest in their home a gift to me....

Hoping things go well for you....(((hugs)))

Re: When You walk into someone's home for the first time....

bathina — Wed, 27 Jun 2018 15:51:10 GMT

I would make sure my entryway and everything in its line of sight was clean and clutter free. Then I would be sure my kitchen sink was spotless. I would also thoroughly clean the bathroom your guests will use.

As long as things your guests will first notice and touch i.e. sink faucets toilets and handles are clean, most guests aren't caring about decor.

Re: When You walk into someone's home for the first time....

QVCkitty1 — Wed, 27 Jun 2018 15:52:15 GMT

The only person that I have as a guest for any length of time is my best friend. She thinks my old house is charming, LOL. My home is not updated, but as long as it is clean , cozy and welcoming, I never worry about what others think. Enjoy your visit.

Re: When You walk into someone's home for the first time....

SeaMaiden — Wed, 27 Jun 2018 15:53:25 GMT

@Desertdi wrote:
I would just dust and vacuum a little, and not make any major changes. It's YOUR HOME.....not theirs.

@Desertdi I WISH I could just do this.... but I feel I need to have things special and much nicer...... that is why I hate having people over.

Re: When You walk into someone's home for the first time....

SeaMaiden — Wed, 27 Jun 2018 15:56:48 GMT

@bathina wrote:
I would make sure my entryway and everything in its line of sight was clean and clutter free. Then I would be sure my kitchen sink was spotless. I would also thoroughly clean the bathroom your guests will use.

As long as things your guests will first notice and touch i.e. sink faucets toilets and handles are clean, most guests aren't caring about decor.

@bathina my "guest" bathroom is down stairs with the washer and dryer in the same place... there is a sink etc. I do not want people using my own bathroom. Do you think that it is rude to have guests use the bathroom that is also a laundry room? It is a nice room... but it is the laundry room/ bathroom. I do not know what else to do as I do not want people in my private bathroom.

Re: When You walk into someone's home for the first time....

Deb665 — Wed, 27 Jun 2018 15:56:59 GMT

I agree with everything the other posters have mentioned, but for me the first impression I have is whether it’s a house or a home. There are beautiful houses everywhere, but I would much rather spend time with someone in a home. Forget the fancy decorations and updates, just let the guests see the love and comfort in your home and all will be well.

Re: When You walk into someone's home for the first time....

SeaMaiden — Wed, 27 Jun 2018 16:01:22 GMT

To all who posted.. wow you make me feel better. So when YOU ALL go to someone elses home you do not in your head see things that are by your standards messy or dirty and make judgements?

I would hope I would not.... but I have not visited someone's home in a long time. That is why I guess I worry.

Re: When You walk into someone's home for the first time....

jannabelle1 — Wed, 27 Jun 2018 16:05:15 GMT

I don't think most people are judgemental, and hopefully yur guests won't be either. I'd just do the basic cleaning. I'd also remove magazines and newspapers that sometimes accumulate and can make a place look cluttered. ...maybe put out a few new scented diffusers. And relax....try to enjoy your company for a few hours! Sometimes what we anticipate turns out to be the exact opposite!

Re: When You walk into someone's home for the first time....

queendiva — Wed, 27 Jun 2018 16:10:28 GMT

Declutter the living room and kitchen, especially of papers, magazines, etc.

Buy new hand soap and hand towels for the bathroom. Make that room super clean and decluttered. Replace the toilet seat if needed.

Bake chocolate chip cookies- the break and bake kind in the dairy section are fine. Make coffee. The smells of baked cookies and coffee mask a lot of unpleasant odors and you can offer the food and drink to your guests.

Whenever you can, open the windows and let fresh air in,

Clean the kitchen sink and counters and the bathroom an hour or two prior to their arrival.

Do you have a pet or pets? Get ALL the pet hair up and remove, don't mask, as much pet odor as possible.

Run a laundry load of whites with a little Clorox bleach. Place the wash in the dryer just before your guests arrive. Nothing like the smell of clean cotton!

Try to enjoy your guests. You don't have to clean the whole house, but you should always keep the public spaces of your house clean and well maintained.

They will be gone soon enough. Who cares if they judge your home? so what?

You will me fine. Give it your best, then relax and smile.

Re: When You walk into someone's home for the first time....

phoenixbrd — Thu, 05 Jul 2018 17:00:46 GMT

@SeaMaiden Over the years of posting, we gain a sense of who people are on the board. I have always thought of you as a kind, considerate, and sharing person, When someone visits your home, these are the qualities that will be noticed by visitors. Yes, your home will "be clean and smell good" so I doubt there will be little critical judgement as to your home (and if there is, that is their critical flaw). You might want to sit quietly for a few minutes and enjoy a cup of tea before they arrive (possibly asking if they would like some when they arrive). You are prepared and think of this as a release from your former anxiety. Remember that thought is very powerful....so let those thoughts be of a loving positive experience with these guests. Let us know how it goes!

Re: When You walk into someone's home for the first time....

IMW — Wed, 27 Jun 2018 16:13:46 GMT

Clean kitchen and bathroom, get some flowers, air out the place. Declutter or hide the clutter and you’re fine.

Serve something nice, even if it’s store bought on nice

dishes.

Re: When You walk into someone's home for the first time....

CatsyCline — Wed, 27 Jun 2018 16:16:34 GMT

I like to have a clean bathroom because i notice nasty cluttered bathrooms at other's homes like 20 shampoos sitting on the toilet tank. and yukky damp towels, no guest towels to use. I always put out fresh towels and and lquid soap.

I go around and de-clutter and run the vac around maybe dust. I touch up the stove top and kitchen sink and declutter the counter top (2 dozen breads and rolls the hub eats) The end of kitchen table is a dumping ground by this guy who lives here lol . This gets cleaned. I am tired of cleaning up after him . He leaves the mail, packages, his CVS Rxs, empty bags, his baseball caps, stuff to recycle, tools, grocery flyers...

TBH when my former inlaws used to visit I would do the real cleaning after they left! esp the bathrooms . They were quite a big family

Re: When You walk into someone's home for the first time....

bathina — Wed, 27 Jun 2018 16:18:56 GMT

I wouldn't have an issue if my host introduced me to the guest bathroom. Not at all. As long as it's clean. I do have an issue with soap scum and hair, etc accumulated in sinks and around faucets, etc. I always wash my hands after using the toilet, so I notice that. I also notice a dirty toilet. I don't mind someone else's clutter or judge how they decorate or not.

The advice in this thread is excellent and nothing so intensive that you can't accomplish it in a couple of days. Then you can relax and enjoy your company!

Re: When You walk into someone's home for the first time....

Qshopper1991 — Wed, 27 Jun 2018 16:27:37 GMT

@SeaMaiden

Why worry or have anxiety about something that probably won't happen?

With that said, I notice three things when I walk into someones' home.

1. The smell

2. How clean it is

3. How organized it is (cluttered or not)

And if I have to look out someone's windows, I do notice if they are clean or not. Probably because I clean mine twice a year and I always dust the inside and outside of my sills every week. Dirt makes me crazy. And I always have windows open (I even crack them for about 20 minutes in the dead of winter to get fresh air in my home every week. Otherwise you just keep breathing the same old air).

Clutter makes me crazy, too. I like organization. In my home. In my work space. I don't understand how people have such disaray around them. I'm just fussy I guess. And I like it that way

Relax about your guests. Just enjoy your time. It's your house. Who cares what they think? Have fun

Re: When You walk into someone's home for the first time....

dex — Wed, 27 Jun 2018 16:38:49 GMT

@SeaMaiden@Generally tidy and reasonably clean equals good to go.A warm welcome and happy visit are much more important.I think your guests will be happy with their time in your home if you make them feel welcome...I always worry too but I try to remember that a person visits me and not my home.

Re: When You walk into someone's home for the first time....

Kitlynn — Wed, 27 Jun 2018 16:42:37 GMT

Just remember the people are coming to visit you not your home. Cleaning your house so that it looks and smells nice is enough. They are not coming to inspect all they want is to feel welcome and to be comfortable in your home. You need to just relax and enjoy having them and you might find you really do have a good time visiting with them. Don't overthink it and just be in the moment.