topic Re: Senior Years in Among Friends

Senior Years

Calcgirl — Wed, 13 Sep 2017 07:32:54 GMT

For those over 65:

Would you live with someone who did not love you just so you would not be lonely or alone?

Re: Senior Years

phluphy — Wed, 13 Sep 2017 08:33:42 GMT

I believe your speaking of a man or maybe a realative?? NO, I would not. I lost my wonderful Husband 3 years ago. I know what love is and could never replace that feeling. Also I have a wonderful family so I'm good. I have friends to enjoy an outing/going to lunch. I fill my day with many fun things to do

Re: Senior Years

Pook — Wed, 13 Sep 2017 08:58:21 GMT

No way! It's hard enough living with someone you love deeply at times.

Re: Senior Years

AngelPuppy1 — Wed, 13 Sep 2017 09:40:31 GMT

Welllll, that's really a question!

I would say --- it depends --- on a lot of things!

First off --- I would have to really like the person and have a great relationship with them.

There would have to be ground rules set right from the start and an understanding of what was expected from the both of you.

Without love, there would be no extra benefits, that's for sure!

But, if it would be agreed upon that the both of you were going into it solely for the purpose of companionship, company, safety, security, friendship, etc., then I say --- go ahead.

It would be a good idea to have an agreement set up in writing, too. For instance, how expenses --- utlities, food, insurance, etc., are to be paid and divided up. And --- who would be doing chores and maintenance, etc.

I don't think the thought of being totally alone in the senior years is all that much fun. Not all of us have a ton of relatives --- children, etc.

So, I could see this beging a good thing. But --- a friendship that has been in the making for quite some time would need to be there before taking that step!

Re: Senior Years

chiclet — Wed, 13 Sep 2017 09:58:44 GMT

That would be a decision based on individual circumstances.

Re: Senior Years

AuntG — Wed, 13 Sep 2017 10:35:19 GMT

I'd live with a friend, just like The Golden Girls.

Re: Senior Years

HiLo — Wed, 13 Sep 2017 10:44:23 GMT

I would live with somebody only for financial reasons and with only a close woman friend.

Re: Senior Years

freakygirl — Wed, 13 Sep 2017 11:19:09 GMT

are you currently married to this person? if you are, and you're not financially dependent on him, nor happy, then i wouldn't stay. if you have family and friends who will be around for company and support, i would definitely go. on the other hand, if you don't feel brave or confident enough to be on your own, then stay.

Re: Senior Years

Desertdi — Wed, 13 Sep 2017 11:47:30 GMT

Several insufferable old codgers have asked to move in with me. All they want is free room and board. They can find somebody else.

Re: Senior Years

Witchy Woman — Wed, 13 Sep 2017 12:11:19 GMT

@Desertdi

I got a good laugh from your response & found myself wanting to know more about the circumstances

But, I wont ask.

Re: Senior Years

Desertdi — Wed, 13 Sep 2017 12:28:46 GMT

@Witchy Woman wrote:
@Desertdi

I got a good laugh from your response & found myself wanting to know more about the circumstances

But, I wont ask.

@Witchy Woman Well.......one of them even asked me what my net worth is...........di

Re: Senior Years

Apple Crisp — Wed, 13 Sep 2017 13:16:58 GMT

Re: Senior Years

software — Wed, 13 Sep 2017 13:43:49 GMT

@Calcgirl wrote:
For those over 65:
Would you live with someone who did not love you just so you would not be lonely or alone?

If you are living with someone NOW, married or not, as long as the relationship is respectful, I could probably hang in there.

You are right, living alone is not fun at any age. I can fill my life with many things to stay busy but it's still lonely at home

Re: Senior Years

Lucky Charm — Wed, 13 Sep 2017 13:47:35 GMT

I don't think I could do it.

Specifically, you said because you already know they don't 'love' you.

That, alone, would make me feel alone/lonely.

It would be awful to lose your husband, and then the thought of being alone from then on.

But to live with someone/anyone in your senior years---just for the sake of having someone else in your/their house, no. Too wierd, too depressing. Too wierd.

I would have to go it alone and make the best of it.

Re: Senior Years

dex — Wed, 13 Sep 2017 13:59:01 GMT

I am not interested in another relationship at my age but I might choose to have a boarder for company...if we were good friends....male or female.I think a male might be easier as they won't be borrowing your stuff.

Re: Senior Years

judy0330 — Wed, 13 Sep 2017 14:50:17 GMT

NEVER! We all have our "things" -- and one of mine is roommates. (My husband is a different story. I love living with him!) A good friend married a man after her husband died because she is the kind of woman who needs to be married. The thought of being on her own terrified her. She is not happy and has realized that she would have been better off and happier on her own.

Re: Senior Years

SeaMaiden — Wed, 13 Sep 2017 15:00:30 GMT

YES. As long as they were kind.

Re: Senior Years

2blonde — Wed, 13 Sep 2017 15:12:58 GMT

No way! I was married at 19, divorced at 25, and I've been single ever since. I've had many relationships over the years, but none of them were invited to move in with me! I have no interest in a relationship anymore, and I believe I was meant to live on my own with only my guy Al (cat)! I never feel lonely, as I do have many friends.

I do have a younger sis, and we love each other and get along well, so I could see us cohabitating as two of the three "Golden Girls," if it ever came to that!

Re: Senior Years

chrystaltree — Wed, 13 Sep 2017 15:34:56 GMT

I assume you are talking about a man; I think it depends on the circumstances. A person can live in the same house with someone and still be very lonely just as people who live alone are not necessarily lonely. If a friend asked me this question, I'd say do not do it. You say don't love this person which makes me think that he loves you or has feelings for you. So, you'd just be lying to him and taking advantage of him. And you would still be lonely.

Re: Senior Years

DiAnne — Wed, 13 Sep 2017 15:46:18 GMT

No. I live alone and I love my privacy. I have many interests and several friends - I am never lonely.

The only way I would ever consider that was if I was financially strapped and needed to rent a room for additional money but hopefully that will not happen!