topic Re: GRANDMA AS FLOWER GIRL in Among Friends

GRANDMA AS FLOWER GIRL

Calcgirl — Mon, 07 Aug 2017 07:19:47 GMT

My grandson is getting married and in many ways I have been like a mother to him. He and his Fiance' have asked me to be their "flower girl". I really don't want to do it but said yes because it meant so much to them. This was a few months ago, and as the day nears, I am getting cold feet. I am a well taken care of 69 year old widow, but won't people laugh? Or should i not care as long as it means something to them? What in the world do I wear???? The wedding is in the early part of November in Az and is a formal affair with the wedding itself in late afternoon.

Re: GRANDMA AS FLOWER GIRL

nana lu — Mon, 07 Aug 2017 08:01:46 GMT

Please do this for them. My 85 year old mother never experienced going to the prom when she was young, so she attended the prom with my daughter. No one laughed. Two of the nice boys asked her to dance. It was an event of a lifetime that she remembered until she died at 93. You will be beautiful and find something appropriate to wear that makes you feel that way. You may set a new trend. Embrace the love.

Re: GRANDMA AS FLOWER GIRL

Big Joanie — Mon, 07 Aug 2017 08:06:05 GMT

Oh my goodness this is the best ....you should be honored ...walk down

that aisle with pride that they thought enough of you to ask you ... I

think its precious and I bet everyone else will too ....yes in fact this

may start a new trend ... I like it !!! You must be very special to them ......

All the best .....

Re: GRANDMA AS FLOWER GIRL

haddon9 — Mon, 07 Aug 2017 09:03:05 GMT

People won't laugh. I think they'll see it as a very nice thing. In Jewish weddings both parents escort the bride down the aisle, not just the father. Ask what they mean by being "flower girl". Are you going to be holding a basket of flowers or will you just be carrying a small bouquet?

However I understand your hesitation. There are things in life that sometimes make us uncomfortable and we just don't want to do it. By the time we become a bit older you would think that we've gotten past some insecurities but unfortunately some things never leave us. Sometimes we also feel that once you reach a certain age we shouldn't have to do things that makes us feel that way....Knowing me I would ask why this means so much to them... but I would probably do it.

As for what to wear, see if you can find out what the mother of the bride & groom are wearing then find something appropriate that makes you comfortable and won't clash with their outfits.

Re: GRANDMA AS FLOWER GIRL

haddon9 — Mon, 07 Aug 2017 09:01:08 GMT

@nana lu wrote:
Please do this for them. My 85 year old mother never experienced going to the prom when she was young, so she attended the prom with my daughter. No one laughed. Two of the nice boys asked her to dance. It was an event of a lifetime that she remembered until she died at 93. You will be beautiful and find something appropriate to wear that makes you feel that way. You may set a new trend. Embrace the love.

Prom? I would laugh say to my grandaughter if you want to spend time with grandma then let's do a nice lunch & some shopping together and I would save the prom for the kids!

I never went to my prom either....but back in 1972 proms just weren't big...at least where I went to school which was a large suburban high school in New Jersey. Out of a class of over 700 only 100 attended the prom. It seemed to be a dying thing at the time.

Re: GRANDMA AS FLOWER GIRL

Nataliesgramma — Mon, 07 Aug 2017 09:25:48 GMT

I don't think people will laugh........I bet you see tears instead .....

Do it....

Re: GRANDMA AS FLOWER GIRL

KingstonsMom — Mon, 07 Aug 2017 09:51:33 GMT

I would walk down that aisle with pride! What a special honor, IMO!

I bet the attendees will think it's special too, not laugh!

Check with the bride & groom as to what you should wear. They may want you to wear the same color scheme as the bridesmaids, etc.

Re: GRANDMA AS FLOWER GIRL

qualitygal — Mon, 07 Aug 2017 17:59:03 GMT

How wonderful for you, keep in mind, they'll be waiting to see the bride. But to be included in something this wonderful! They must think so much of you, and that's what I'd care about, not the others. Ask the bride to be what she has in mind for you to wear. Maybe she can even take a couple of hours and help you shop. Just get your dominos in a row and enjoy that day. In a time, when grandparents are an afterthought, you get a great way to create memories for them. They are pretty special too, to honor you that way. Do it if you can, it'll be wonderful for all!!!!

I think the term: Flower Girl, just denotes where in the bridal procession she would be.

Re: GRANDMA AS FLOWER GIRL

Vivian — Mon, 07 Aug 2017 10:43:13 GMT

I'm a 70 year old grandmother, also very close to my grandson. He's 22 and has had a serious girlfriend for over two years. If and when they marry, I'd be thrilled to be part of the wedding party in any role, including flower girl. The guests will be thrilled with the kind gesture on the newlyweds' part and on your part. If there's a color scheme and the bride wants you to wear a certain color dress, that's all you need to know. I just know you will be glad you agreed to be flower girl. Have a wonderful time! It's my fondest wish to be at my grandchildren's weddings.

Re: GRANDMA AS FLOWER GIRL

candys mine — Mon, 07 Aug 2017 10:55:09 GMT

Oh, please Do IT! This is Your Grandson getting Married here. Family history in the making and he wants you to be a part of it. Own the honor as you walk down the aisle leading your family to such an important event in ther lives. I agree with the other poster that you should find out what you should wear and carry. Discuss it beforehand. I, myself, think that sprinkling petals like a sprite may not be the thing to do. Maybe carry some dried flowers that you can transform into some other display to give them on their first annervirsary? I don't know what faith they are but perhaps you could carry a Rosary with the boquet and give them that as a rememberance of the day. Be a part of it all!

Re: GRANDMA AS FLOWER GIRL

queendiva — Mon, 07 Aug 2017 11:58:00 GMT

Never heard of a grandma as flower girl? Good! You and the Bride & Groom get to "invent" the role. I see you as having a very special place in the procession. Do check with them on the color and length of your dress. I see you carrying a beautiful bouquet to compliment the bridesmaids flowers, as your dress should compliment theirs. I was just MOG last month. I think this idea is much lovlier than including a very young girl. At least no one has to worry about your behavior!

What a special honor for you! Go for it and be fabulous!

Re: GRANDMA AS FLOWER GIRL

I am still oxox — Mon, 07 Aug 2017 12:13:27 GMT

My brother and brother in law escorted my DH grandma down the aisle.

I think it is a sweet and loving gesture that they asked you

I do not think any one would laugh, in fact the opposite.

Re: GRANDMA AS FLOWER GIRL

Kardi — Mon, 07 Aug 2017 12:18:30 GMT

The large, formal wedding hasn't been a big thing in my family. My sister was the only one who did it. My brother and sister-in-law just did a justice of the peace thing as did my husband and I. My kids did simple weddings, no attendants. If one of my grandkids asked me to be in their wedding, I'd be SO honored. Now that I'm older, I'd jump at the chance. You've received a very precious offer. Embrace it! Don't miss this!

Re: GRANDMA AS FLOWER GIRL

K9buddy — Mon, 07 Aug 2017 12:19:48 GMT

When my daughter got married, to honor my mother (her grandmother) she had a groomsman walk Mom down the aisle. I don't see the need for you to have to carry a basket of rose petals to be part of the procession.

Re: GRANDMA AS FLOWER GIRL

Patriot3 — Mon, 07 Aug 2017 12:57:21 GMT

Oh, Grandma, please do this!! I think it is a wonderful, sweet gesture for your Grandson and Fiancee to think so highly of you. Do it!!

Re: GRANDMA AS FLOWER GIRL

AnikaBrodie — Mon, 07 Aug 2017 12:59:20 GMT

@Calcgirl

You should feel honored. Obviously, you and your dear grandson have a very special relationship. Anyone who knows will shed tears ... not laugh. You may see a few smiles at the special thought. Just do it and enjoy every moment. He and his soon to be wife adore you.

Groom with Grandma

Re: GRANDMA AS FLOWER GIRL

fthunt — Mon, 07 Aug 2017 13:02:11 GMT

My question: why was the term 'flower girl' chosen? Matron of Honor is more appropriate for a senior person - or perhaps just join your grandson at the alter when he watches his bride come down the runway. Personally, if I'm not comfortable being F-G I would thank him but decline.

Re: GRANDMA AS FLOWER GIRL

millieshops — Mon, 07 Aug 2017 13:02:41 GMT

@CalcgirlI'd do it and I have some years on you. I think you'll have a wonderful day.

What to wear? I'd take this as an occasion to find something elegant to wear in a color that fits into the wedding party. In no way would I want to try to be cute as works so well for the little ones who traditionally take this position.

Re: GRANDMA AS FLOWER GIRL

beckyb1012 — Mon, 07 Aug 2017 13:52:00 GMT

What a beautiful experience for you to have. How many Grandparents would be thrilled with a five minute phone call every few months. To have him want you to be a part of this day speaks so much of his heart and the hearts that raised him.

Do it for him the way you would have done anything to make him smile and hug your neck when he was a toddler.

Re: GRANDMA AS FLOWER GIRL

susan kay — Mon, 07 Aug 2017 14:03:31 GMT

@Calcgirl, well, first of all, I would feel honored. You must be very special to be invited to be in the wedding party. See what the other members of the party are wearing and find something that blends in. Run some ideas by the bride, or ask her for some suggestions.

It does sound like the words "flower girl" are what is really bothering you. If I were in your shoes, especially because of the relationship you have with the groom and bride, I would ask if you could have a different title for the wedding and explain how you are feeling. It sounds like something that could very easily be worked out to make you feel more comfortable!