topic Re: Does anyone regift? in Among Friends

Does anyone regift?

Nataliesgramma — Sat, 08 Aug 2015 16:53:41 GMT

I watered a friends plants and checked on her house when she went on vacation. She brought me back a pair of long dangling seashell earrings as a "Thank You". I don't wear those type of earrings, but I told her they were very nice and I appreciated the gesture.

I was just going to tuck them away in my jewelry box, but my daughter thinks I should regift them to a relative who likes that kind of jewelry. I have never "regifted" anything before.....

Re: Does anyone regift?

GCR18 — Sat, 08 Aug 2015 17:09:12 GMT

I would likely just give them to that relative.

Re: Does anyone regift?

Reba055 — Sat, 08 Aug 2015 17:12:55 GMT

I would give them to my relative and tell her that they were given to me as a gift and while they are beautiful (even if you don't think they are, not to insult her taste) that they are not something you would probably wear and you thought of her and would like for her to have them.

Re: Does anyone regift?

sandraskates — Sat, 08 Aug 2015 17:14:49 GMT

If you're not going to wear I'd say pass them along to the relative that would. Either gift them on a special occasion or just give them to her. She'd probably be thrilled.

Re: Does anyone regift?

seaBreeze — Sat, 08 Aug 2015 17:25:00 GMT

Never .... I always "exchange" it for something I really want (if I don't know where it was purchased ... I discreetly find out). For me, I would not want someone's "gift."

Re: Does anyone regift?

sunala — Sat, 08 Aug 2015 17:30:36 GMT

@seaBreeze wrote:

Never .... I always "exchange" it for something I really want (if I don't know where it was purchased ... I discreetly find out). For me, I would not want someone's "gift."

Sure, why not? If I hate the fragrance of a perfume I receive as a gift, and I haven't opened it, why in the world wouldn't I give it to someone who I know loves it?

How could I ask the gifter (discreetly) where she bought the perfume? She'd probably know I wanted to return it, which would make matters worse.

I'd pass it on to someone who loves it, and it would make me feel good. And I'd be rid of it!

Re: Does anyone regift?

nomless — Sat, 08 Aug 2015 17:47:03 GMT

Give them to her, but not as a gift for a special occasion.

I am not a of regifting. A friend of mine once gave me a Christmas gift saying "Someone gave this to me but I don't like it, so I'm giving it to you. Merry Christmas." Wow. What message does that convey? IMO, it says she doesn't value the friendship enough to spend a few minutes looking for something I might enjoy. I'm only worthy of receiving what she considers junk. I was insulted. If she doesn't care enough to spend a little time to personnally select a gift, it's not much of a friendship.

IMO, regifting is tacky and disrespectful.

Re: Does anyone regift?

Jacie — Sat, 08 Aug 2015 17:50:30 GMT

Never Ever. I was taught that it was very tacky to do so. I might give something away or sell it in a sale or even donate, but never re-gift it as in wrapped up for an occasion.

Re: Does anyone regift?

Drythe — Sun, 09 Aug 2015 05:57:07 GMT

Is this what you consider re-gifting?

If someone is kind enough to give me a gift and it just doesn't suit for some reason I may offer it to a friend whom I think will like it. I don't pretend it is something new, or wrap it up, I simply say it was a gift and it just doesn't work for me. If the person to whom I offer it can use it, or knows someone who will, that's good. If not it goes to good will.

Re: Does anyone regift?

gmkb — Sat, 08 Aug 2015 18:12:01 GMT

Yes, I think you should give them to someone who would enjoy them, but not as an occasion gift. Just say they were given to you and it is not your style.

i wonder if the giver was regifting to you. If she knows you well enough to trust you in her house when she is gone, surely she has noticed what type of earrings you wear.

Re: Does anyone regift?

susan kay — Sat, 08 Aug 2015 19:22:21 GMT

I would just "give" it to the relative that you feel would enjoy the earrings and tell her where you got them and that they are not your style. Since your friend bought these on vacation, and there is no way you can exchange them for something that you would like, that is what I would do. Don't save them for an occasion, such as a birthday. Just give them to your relative. I don't regift. Years ago a friend of mine regifted a present to me. It was a hard bound, beautiful book. Unfortunately, a few hours after I received the "present", I found an inscription a few pages into the book. There was a personal note to my regifter and signed by the person who gave it to her. Tacky.

Re: Does anyone regift?

chi5925 — Sat, 08 Aug 2015 20:32:08 GMT

Did I miss something?

Was there an amendment passed to the US Constitution that requires a gift be actually purchased by the giftor to the giftee??

Seriously......as long as the gift is new, unused -- what's the big deal in giving it to someone else?

Re: Does anyone regift?

circles — Sat, 08 Aug 2015 21:25:16 GMT

I will give a gift I don't care for to someone who would like it...but not as a gift....thats tacky.....I would tell them how I came to have it and ask if they would like it....

Re: Does anyone regift?

RedTop — Sat, 08 Aug 2015 21:35:04 GMT

Yes I have, without any qualms whatsoever. The incident that immediately comes to mind also involved a pair of earrings that was not my style. However, I did wear them once to lunch with a close friend, who noticed them, and commented on them immediately. Halfway thru our lunch my friend made another comment about the earrings, in terms of them being something she would buy for herself. During dessert, she looked me in the eye and asked point blank why in the world I ever bought myself those earrings, when it was obvious I didn't like them that much! I explained how I came to have those earrings in the first place, and when we were in the parking lot saying goodbye, I took the earrings out and gave them to her.

Re: Does anyone regift?

nomless — Sat, 08 Aug 2015 21:40:34 GMT

@chi5925 wrote:
Did I miss something?

Was there an amendment passed to the US Constitution that requires a gift be actually purchased by the giftor to the giftee??

Seriously......as long as the gift is new, unused -- what's the big deal in giving it to someone else?

The big deal about a regift is that there's no thought behind it. It's impersonal. It's a means for the giver to get rid of stuff. It's a hand-me-down even if unused. It's tacky and disrespectful.

And no, it's not about the money. Consider these two scenarios: If someone is unable to afford the purchase of a gift at a special time, I would rather get nothing than something they're giving me only because they hate it. On the other hand, if they're giving me something they cherish because they know I love it, too, that's a special gift. It's the thought behind the two gifts that matters. The first is meaningless. The second has great meaning.

Re: Does anyone regift?

nomless — Sat, 08 Aug 2015 21:44:26 GMT

@RedTop wrote:
Yes I have, without any qualms whatsoever. The incident that immediately comes to mind also involved a pair of earrings that was not my style. However, I did wear them once to lunch with a close friend, who noticed them, and commented on them immediately. Halfway thru our lunch my friend made another comment about the earrings, in terms of them being something she would buy for herself. During dessert, she looked me in the eye and asked point blank why in the world I ever bought myself those earrings, when it was obvious I didn't like them that much! I explained how I came to have those earrings in the first place, and when we were in the parking lot saying goodbye, I took the earrings out and gave them to her.

The difference is that she admired them and told you so. Totally OK to give them to her in a casual situation "just because.".

Re: Does anyone regift?

blackhole99 — Sat, 08 Aug 2015 22:40:39 GMT

I have been regifted to many times from relatives, they tell me who bought it for them and why they don't like it and offer it to me. So being afraid of hurting their feelings and seeming ungrateful, I will accept the unwanted item and then just dispose of it. I have regifted, but only if it's like a secret Santa at work.

Re: Does anyone regift?

chiclets — Sun, 09 Aug 2015 00:33:00 GMT

Re: Does anyone regift?

Tinkrbl44 — Sun, 09 Aug 2015 02:40:49 GMT

Yikes ..... I didn't realize there were so many tactless people in the world!

Hey, we recycle all sorts of things ..... and if I was given something that just wasn't me, what am I supposed to do with it? Throw it out? Give it to Goodwill?

Truth be told, a lot of people aren't very good at selecting gifts and the recipient shouldn't have to "suffer" and wear or use something they don't like!

Re: Does anyone regift?

AngelPuppy1 — Sun, 09 Aug 2015 11:19:35 GMT

I don't want to waste something by just leaving it set or throwing it out. So, I will give it away. Not as a gift, really, but just, if I think a family member or friend could make use of it.