topic Re: College.... Part 2 in Mom to Mom

College.... Part 2

nascar fan — Tue, 29 Jul 2014 00:37:58 GMT

I read the first thread about kiddos leaving for college. My youngest grand reports in on August 3rd. She won an awesome soccer scholarship. School is small,just what she wanted. But it is about seven hrs. away from here. I have been buying stuff for her dorm room since Jan. My daughter is starting to freak now!! And I think gd is getting sorta concerned too! My question... is there anything that you experienced moms can think of that she might need to make her home away from home ,well more homey?? Or something's that you and your children found really usefull??? Thanks!!!

Re: College.... Part 2

jackthebear — Tue, 29 Jul 2014 12:10:33 GMT

probably the best advice is for her mother is to stop freaking because it is obviously affecting her daughter.

Best advice-- don't take too much.

Depending on where she is going, chances are there is a store where she can buy what she needs, or can easily order it.

Re: College.... Part 2

AutumnBlonde — Tue, 29 Jul 2014 13:25:59 GMT

Reassure your daughter that you know that she will do just fine. And Mom... have faith that you did a great job raising her to make good choices. One thing I found is that the first week on campus is the most difficult. There is a lot of adjusting to a new situation. She'll probably feel like she is in a constant state of change and without the routine of classes the dorms can be a bit wild. Remind her that she can call and discuss "anything" with you and you will "listen" and offer support. It really helps to counter balance the negative side of peer pressure. Reassure her that what she says to you, will not be shared with others ... and keep that promise. Don't call her everyday. She needs to have new experiences, on her own. Yes, it going to be hard, very hard, but let her call you. (You will get to know her schedule and find a time, once a week, to chat during her free time.) You said that she is on a soccer scholarship, that's great! She will start her college experience with a coach and teammates to help her adjust to her new home way from home. The coach(s) and teammates will help her avoid the drinking and drugs that are rampant on campus. Yes, that is true. The colleges talk a good game about their drug and drink policies, but that is usually it ... just talk. Best wishes!!

Re: College.... Part 2

queendiva — Tue, 29 Jul 2014 13:44:03 GMT

One son is a college grad, the other will be a junior next month. Both lived exclusively on campus. Sorry, but you have probably already bought way too much for the dorm room. The room is likely SMALL and she will be sharing the space with someone! She will be fine, as she will meet good people right away- her soccer team. You and Mom need to get it together and be happy and supportive. (and stop shopping!)

Re: College.... Part 2

colliegirls — Tue, 29 Jul 2014 14:08:32 GMT

The most important thing any son or daughter can do when they move into campus is to make friends immediately. Meet the students on the floor along with your roommate and go out to dinner or breakfast or whatever, that first day. The sooner they make friends, the more they will enjoy college and they will feel at home. Encourage them to stay on campus on the weekends, its the only way for them to feel comfortable in their new life. The students on a sports team have it easier since they will be a member of the group right away.

Re: College.... Part 2

lolakimono — Tue, 29 Jul 2014 14:41:28 GMT

Food!

Re: College.... Part 2

nascar fan — Tue, 29 Jul 2014 23:16:37 GMT

Lol on the food comment!!!We have her a stash of favorites in case we can't find them readily!!It is a small Babtist college. She has been to Europe twice once for 2 weeks and this summer for3 weeks. This kid has her head on her shoulders and I know she and her mom will be fine!! Shehas been exposed to alchol and can't stand the taste!! She knows not to accept drinks at parties,etc. In fact,she isn't a 'party' type girl. Very athletic, but can be girly! She had a junior black belt in tae Kune do (sp). She would be some guys worst nightmare if truly mad!! She can take down her older brother who is a 3degree black belt! It takes her a bit and she has to catch him unaware but can do it. So we arnt too concerned about her safety ,as we think she can defend herself until help comes. It is a small campus and they haven't had and assaults ! The first night there is a team meeting and she is a goal oriented girl!! Otherwise she wouldn't be where she is! I probally have bought too much but I wanted her to be comfortable.! I kept telling her homeless people have more stuff that they tote!! I know that is wrong, but I wanted her to have a comfy place. Those dorm rooms are probally worse than those that some fed prisoners live I !! Lol I was just hoping that I could find a surprise to send along that would make life fun for her. Thanks for the advice though!!

Re: College.... Part 2

nascar fan — Tue, 29 Jul 2014 23:17:50 GMT

Sorry if that was hard to read, on IPad and it turns out like that on the Q!!!

Re: College.... Part 2

JamicaJammer — Wed, 30 Jul 2014 14:10:35 GMT

Dorm rooms are often TINY!!! She can always ADD stuff, hard to get stuff back home if she's overloading to begin with.

Everything being online now, she can order from Walmart, etc. if there isn't one close or if she doesn't have a car on campus, or campus is too far from Mom.

Re: College.... Part 2

nascar fan — Wed, 30 Jul 2014 17:55:00 GMT

The campus is about a 7 hr. drive.her room actually has a fairly large closet considering it is shared by 2 girls. When I spoke of buying stuff, I meant her bedding,towels and such. So quite a bit won't actually need to be stored.i found an awesome site DormCo, 2.99 nipping no matter what. I bought most of her bedding from them. A mattress topper that is almost as thick asthe college mattress is. It is shrink wrapped and all her 3sets of sheets, 8 towels,comforter,toweling robe are shrinked into 1 bag. Her dad is leaving her his pickup and dd is driving her in her car. Her soccer team is hitting the ground running so I just wanted her to not have to shop. The closest bb&b about hour&half awway. But there is a walmart. Her folks will only have a coupla hrs. to help her get organized. Once again, I just wanted some fun ideas !!! Her 18th birthday is the 8th and it will be the first one I will miss!! IHAVE her gift cards ready, just wanted a surprise for her!!

Re: College.... Part 2

Hoovermom — Wed, 30 Jul 2014 17:58:53 GMT

You sound like an awesome GM and obviously so proud of her. I am sure whatever you bought her will fit in somehow it always does LOL. Anyway, congratulations to all of you.

Re: College.... Part 2

karil — Fri, 01 Aug 2014 16:33:48 GMT

My daughter was a freshman last fall -- one thing that I noticed during my visits is that she put up the pictures and cards I sent. Pinned to a little cork board. With so much digital, seems that there is still a place for printed photos and written notes.

Re: College.... Part 2

colliegirls — Fri, 01 Aug 2014 16:39:04 GMT

The most important advice is RELAX! Did you or your daughter attend college? It is a wonderful time in every child's life.

Re: College.... Part 2

beach-mom — Fri, 01 Aug 2014 16:44:24 GMT

I started college 9 hours away from home, and I was miserable. DS will start his second year on the other side of the country, and we probably won't see him again until Christmas. DD went only 2 hours away, but it might have well been more. I think the topper you got her is a wonderful idea - college mattresses are horrible! We invested a lot of money in those too. Even though the nearest BBB is an hour and a half away, you might want to consider their "shop here, pick up there" program. We used that. You go through the store and 'zap" what you want with one of those tools (like brides use). When we got there last year to move him in, we found that his room was so small, we couldn't use half the stuff we got. It's OK - you're not obligated to get anything you ordered. But it is nice to have it all there and waiting for you!

One thing I did for DD - I got her a heart ring from Judith Ripka. I had just "discovered" QVC! I told her that my heart was always with her, and if she ever felt lonely or homesick, just look at her ring and know Mom is thinking about her!

Re: College.... Part 2

ILUVChristmas — Sat, 02 Aug 2014 06:08:29 GMT

My child was a freshman last year but was only 1 hour away. Just have to have faith that they will be ok. Its time for them to be on their own and they will learn to do so. My child loved it and did fantastic. Now my child is going to attend college closer to home and is looking forward to it. On another note, some freshmen students did find that college was not for them and are attending community college or doing something else for employment. That's ok to. It's not for everyone. But you have some great advice in the previous posts above! Hope all goes well .

Re: College.... Part 2

pommom — Fri, 08 Aug 2014 02:41:09 GMT

Cut back on dorm stuff - they're all too cramped anyway. Found out the hard way.

Secondly, you'd be surprised at how well and quickly they adjust to college life.

This is a different season for both your and your DD's lives. Embrace it.

Re: College.... Part 2

ceh — Sat, 16 Aug 2014 06:35:45 GMT

My daughter played field hockey in college several hours away from home. Since your grandaughter started her preseason on Aug 3, she is most likely being kept so busy that she falls into bed at night. She will develop close friendships with the girls on the team and they will become family. My daughter's team did everything together. It really helped her adjust to college and being so far way from home. The team provides a whole family of friends and your grandaughter won't be a new student all alone on a new campus. I wouldn't worry about her room. As long as she has the essentials, she will be fine. She'll have a busy first semester between practices, games, team building activities and, most important, school work. It will be stressful so be supportive. Sending cards, emails, and care packages frequently is probably the best thing you and your daughter can do besides attending a few games if possible. Don't worry about her room, she'll make it her own. Congratulations on her scholarship and I wish you all the best. It's an exciting time in your lives.