topic Re: GRANDMAS AND CHRISTMAS ! in Mom to Mom

GRANDMAS AND CHRISTMAS !

Goodie2shoes — Fri, 20 Dec 2019 03:56:45 GMT

My daughter said "no more toys mom" Well who does she think she is ? I have a 4 yr old grandson (Mr. Busy) and he loves paw patrol. I have purchased several paw patrol toys along with several other toys for him for Christmas but I want to buy more. He already has over 200 matchbox and hotwheel cars and trucks which have taken over their family room. I think he needs more ! Whats a grandma to do ? His dad does not complain. After all he's the only little one, my only other grandchild is 19 and he says he doesn't want anything for Christmas. ( I don't believe that and he won't get left off Santa's list !) Any of you Grandmas out there have the same problem ? What do you do ? I've already told him Santa will stop by my home and his home, he's so excited and I love it !

Re: GRANDMAS AND CHRISTMAS !

FancyPhillyshopper — Fri, 20 Dec 2019 04:04:53 GMT

How about crayons and other art supplies?

Professional photos (with Grandma)?

College fund?

Re: GRANDMAS AND CHRISTMAS !

chrystaltree — Fri, 20 Dec 2019 04:07:45 GMT

A grandmother has to do what a grandmother has to do. We're supposed to buy them toys, we are supposed to let them eat cookies even if they haven't finished their veggies. We are supposed to let them stay up until 9pm when they sleep over, even if Mom says bedtime is 8pm. It's in the Grandmother's Job Description. Follow your heart and buy your little guy what he wants. She'll be fine with it. She knows you love him to bits.

Re: GRANDMAS AND CHRISTMAS !

Carmie — Fri, 20 Dec 2019 04:08:35 GMT

I don't buy my grand kids too many toys. My DIL is a clean and neat freak. She throws or donates just about everything that she considers to be clutter. Her house is spotless and toys are gotten rid of a few times a year.

I would suggest you honor your daughter's wishes. If you must buy new toys, keep them at your house, so when your grandson visits, he will have things to play with. You can deal with the toy clutter.

Re: GRANDMAS AND CHRISTMAS !

Kachina624 — Fri, 20 Dec 2019 04:10:34 GMT

@FancyPhillyshopper. What self-respecting little boy wants a picture of grandma or a contribution to his college fund? Toys, that's the name of the game. I'd lay off the match book cars though.

Re: GRANDMAS AND CHRISTMAS !

Goodie2shoes — Fri, 20 Dec 2019 04:11:40 GMT

@chrystaltreewrote: A grandmother has to do what a grandmother has to do. We're supposed to buy them toys, we are supposed to let them eat cookies even if they haven't finished their veggies. We are supposed to let them stay up until 9pm when they sleep over, even if Mom says bedtime is 8pm. It's in the Grandmother's Job Description. Follow your heart and buy your little guy what he wants. She'll be fine with it. She knows you love him to bits.

Exactly My feelings ! thanks

Re: GRANDMAS AND CHRISTMAS !

Goodie2shoes — Fri, 20 Dec 2019 04:19:27 GMT

@FancyPhillyshopper wrote:

How about crayons and other art supplies?

Professional photos (with Grandma)?

College fund?

Thanks for your suggestions, he has crayons and art supplies and a college fund has been started. We have plenty of photos together but no professional poses so I will give that some thought. I just think as a grandma it's my duty to buy him what he likes. I took a grandma oath !

Re: GRANDMAS AND CHRISTMAS !

on the bay — Fri, 20 Dec 2019 04:22:13 GMT

@Goodie2shoes -I'm laughing at your "Who does she think she is?!"

And though there is so much joy in buying presents for the grandkids,

I do think that the more toys they have, the less they may tend to appreciate them.

One hotwheel toy can be so special but how can they be special when you have 100?

I was just telling my son that a version of retail therapy for a grandma is strolling the toy isles with other grandmas who are total strangers but you all smile at each other.

I just like to look at all the toys and see what is current. Plus as you know, what they like may change every day. One week its paw patrol,

the next month they may have moved on to something new.

I always respect my kids wishes regarding their children. I loved them first and respect and love them now, not only as my children but as parents to my grandchildren.

Re: GRANDMAS AND CHRISTMAS !

K9buddy — Fri, 20 Dec 2019 04:27:28 GMT

Books, fun pajamas, puzzles, special date with grandma, baking cookies.

Re: GRANDMAS AND CHRISTMAS !

Goodie2shoes — Fri, 20 Dec 2019 04:34:18 GMT

I guess I should also say that Mr Busy has plenty of educational toys. He has the plastic alphabet letters and knows the complete alphabet, he can spell some words on his word board and he has plenty of learning books. I also purchased him a childrens tablet for Christmas so I am being a good grandma. I do think as someone mentioned that it's my grandma duty to spoil him a little. I do let him stay up longer when he stays with me (just a little).

Re: GRANDMAS AND CHRISTMAS !

alicedee — Fri, 20 Dec 2019 04:40:09 GMT

I always checked with my son and daughter-in-law before buying Christmas gifts for the grandchildren....if they were planning on having Santa bring certain things, I didn't want to spoil their plans. If they had ever told me to not buy so much....I would have honored their wishes (and kept some things at my house!).

Maybe think about spending money on things like a musical instrument and lessons... or perhaps swimming, skiing or skating lessons and equipment.

Re: GRANDMAS AND CHRISTMAS !

on the bay — Fri, 20 Dec 2019 23:46:32 GMT

@Goodie2shoes

I'll never forget when my grandfather told me I could pick out anything in the store. I was less than 10 and it was like a five and ten cent type store. I felt like I had been transported to a magical candy lane of toys.

I was so overwhelmed I ended up not picking out anything.

I think this is a fun thing to do. Let them pick whatever they want (and set a money limit of course and one thing). What a thrill it is!

Even though it sounds like you already got him enough presents for him to open at Christmas, you could save this for his birthday.

Re: GRANDMAS AND CHRISTMAS !

GCR18 — Fri, 20 Dec 2019 05:02:18 GMT

It's too late now, you already bought them. I think I'd listen to her a little and buy a little less. Perhaps you could transition from all toys to things you can do together to build memories. Like a day at the zoo, aquarium, ball game, etc.

Re: GRANDMAS AND CHRISTMAS !

Sooner — Fri, 20 Dec 2019 05:11:36 GMT

I think going against the mother's wishes might be starting a bad trend in the relationships. Why do it? I don't see any point in it.

Re: GRANDMAS AND CHRISTMAS !

lOVETOSHOP — Fri, 20 Dec 2019 05:48:38 GMT

My husband and I became first time grandparents three months ago. Of course, we were so excited to buy gifts for our little grandson on this, his first Christmas. I did tell myself not to go crazy, since the little guy doesn't even know what Christmas is yet! So I bought him a cute outfit, a book and a toy appropriate for his age. Grandpa, however, has been going hog wild...every day there's another delivery at the door...another toy....then another toy...then another....I ask him "did you buy the baby another toy?" And he keeps answering "yeah, but that's the last one." Sure enough, the next day...ding-dong....another package arrives. All together, I think he bought him close to a dozen gifts! I know he's excited, but come on...he's a three month old baby!

I told him, let's wait until he's old enough to understand Christmas and open his gifts, then we can go a little crazy....that is if our son and daughter-in-law let us buy too much more after this year's antics!!

Re: GRANDMAS AND CHRISTMAS !

Sooner — Fri, 20 Dec 2019 15:46:37 GMT

Yikes! Some of these parents have a long road in front of them.

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beckyb1012 — Fri, 20 Dec 2019 17:30:13 GMT

My DDIL makes a toy purge every year just because of this and it is donated to charities. This year my 5 year old granddaughter helped instead of not being home, she loved the giving. My grandson is too young to notice his toy chest is light for the moment. I give all the usual items, toys, clothes, candy, and cash for the savings/piggy banks. I just love that they want me to spend Christmas Eve night with them every year for the Christmas morning chaos. It so is!!!!!

The joy of being a Grandmother is getting to indulge and it is the child who will have the precious memories long after we are home to our reward. I think of my dear deceased Mam-ma constantly, she is my inspiration.

Re: GRANDMAS AND CHRISTMAS !

Nataliesgramma — Fri, 20 Dec 2019 21:53:23 GMT

Make a spare bedroom in your house a playroom for him.....You can buy him toys that stay at your house...

Or...like I do with my granddaughter.....if she wants to take one home...one from her house comes here....or he has to bring it back next time he visits.

My daughter used to complain that her house was turning into "Toys R Us" too and this has worked out for us...

Re: GRANDMAS AND CHRISTMAS !

kitty60 — Fri, 20 Dec 2019 23:14:49 GMT

I try not to buy too much for my grands but always pick items I know they enjoy. After the first year or two I realized I was buying more for me than them. We spend Christmas Day with them but they spend the day before Christmas with my dil's mother and her spouse and her father and his. Before Christmas day they have already had 2 Christmas celebrations, theirs that morning and then when I show up in the afternoon. Honestly, they do not need that much stuff! I also refuse to buy them things every time we go to the store just to buy something. As they have gotten older I find I enjoy treating them to something they would like that mom or dad wouldn't purchase. For my teen it is usually a more pricey pair of shoes that she likes and it is my one weakness! My eight year old spent last weekend with me and we had so much fun doing things...cooking, decorating and yest using exercise equipment. All she kept saying is "this is why I love spending time at MawMaw's house." It's time well spent, not dollars spent.

Re: GRANDMAS AND CHRISTMAS !

SandySparkles — Sat, 21 Dec 2019 05:46:21 GMT

I am a grandmother of 3 little ones, and I love spoiling them also, but I would respect her desire for no more cars this time since he has so many. There has to be something else that will put a smile on his face on Christmas morning. We are entitled to our "grandmotherly" indulgences, but should try to abide by SOME of the wishes of our children, just as we wanted or expected our parents to.😉 They seldom did however.😂😂

~~~All we need is LOVE💖