topic Re: Fair is Fair in Community Chat

Fair is Fair

QVCkitty1 — Wed, 14 Dec 2016 22:04:28 GMT

I was just thinking, there are always a lot of responses to complaints about QVC, that say change the channel. OK, fair enough, but isn't it also fair to say avoid the posts that you know will annoy or frustrate you ? I mean live and let live. If someone says their Christmas is ruined, it is most likely just temporary venting over a situation that at this point is out of their control. I mean some people were accusing these folks of not knowing the meaningI of Christmas, kind of harsh. No one forces us to read any of these posts. I guess I'm just asking to be fair for the holidays. 🎄🎄

Re: Fair is Fair

dex — Wed, 14 Dec 2016 22:06:55 GMT

I think fair is individual...there isn't a rule book anymore.

Re: Fair is Fair

cherry — Wed, 14 Dec 2016 22:33:01 GMT

The only person you can control on the boards is yourself. No matter how well meaning you are , people will post as they wish

Re: Fair is Fair

Moonchilde — Wed, 14 Dec 2016 23:09:19 GMT

Fair? I'm not sure how the concept of "fair" works as far as people posting opinions that aren't "nice", agreeable, warm and fuzzy.

I think it's perfectly valid, in a thread where a poster pitches a hissyfit because they didn't get "a" package when they were supposed to and their "Christmas was ruined", that others express opinions that presents and material things have traditionally not been THE point of Xmas. It's plausible to believe that a person who comes unglued about a missing package is only into the material aspect of Xmas, and yes, needs to be reminded of why *most* people celebrate.

In poor families, low on their Christmas celebrations is "stuff". What's important for them is being together, having a good time with enough food to eat and at least 1-2 small gifts for their children. Others, rich and poor and in-between, add religious observance into the mix.

The forums are about expressing one's opinions. Although some posters think they *should*, 100% of the time, be about positive thinking, love and lifting everyone up all the time - so anyone who posts otherwise in their opinions should just shut up, keep quiet, go away, etc because they're not being "nice."

No forum anywhere works that way unless it is a faith-based group. The forums are what they are. "Be nice", Don't be mean/nasty", "Always be supportive of everyone", etc. are the POV and outlook of some. But they have no power to coerce, control, nanny or "shame" other posters, though they try - for the best reasons of course.

Everyone's opinion has a right to be stated, like it or not, think it's mean or not. It's part of the give-and-take that's a discussion forum.

Re: Fair is Fair

sunshine45 — Wed, 14 Dec 2016 23:44:56 GMT

it is easier to avoid a post that lets you know CLEARLY what it is about.......

Re: Fair is Fair

occasionalrain — Wed, 14 Dec 2016 23:46:31 GMT

I can't know what is important to poor families, it's not my business what Christmas means some other. I can't know if a promised package that doesn't arrive as promised has ruined a poster's Christmas, only they know.

Re: Fair is Fair

QVCkitty1 — Wed, 14 Dec 2016 23:51:12 GMT

@Moonchilde wrote:
Fair? I'm not sure how the concept of "fair" works as far as people posting opinions that aren't "nice", agreeable, warm and fuzzy.

I think it's perfectly valid, in a thread where a poster pitches a hissyfit because they didn't get "a" package when they were supposed to and their "Christmas was ruined", that others express opinions that presents and material things have traditionally not been THE point of Xmas. It's plausible to believe that a person who comes unglued about a missing package is only into the material aspect of Xmas, and yes, needs to be reminded of why *most* people celebrate.

In poor families, low on their Christmas celebrations is "stuff". What's important for them is being together, having a good time with enough food to eat and at least 1-2 small gifts for their children. Others, rich and poor and in-between, add religious observance into the mix.

The forums are about expressing one's opinions. Although some posters think they *should*, 100% of the time, be about positive thinking, love and lifting everyone up all the time - so anyone who posts otherwise in their opinions should just shut up, keep quiet, go away, etc because they're not being "nice."

No forum anywhere works that way unless it is a faith-based group. The forums are what they are. "Be nice", Don't be mean/nasty", "Always be supportive of everyone", etc. are the POV and outlook of some. But they have no power to coerce, control, nanny or "shame" other posters, though they try - for the best reasons of course.

Everyone's opinion has a right to be stated, like it or not, think it's mean or not. It's part of the give-and-take that's a discussion forum.

God forbid I ask anyone to be nice, I know better, my point was, why aggravate youself by reading posts, that bore, infuriate or otherwise just tick you off ?

Re: Fair is Fair

occasionalrain — Wed, 14 Dec 2016 23:55:12 GMT

@sunshine45 wrote:
it is easier to avoid a post that lets you know CLEARLY what it is about.......

To me, teaser threads are inconsiderate, rude.

Re: Fair is Fair

Plaid Pants2 — Thu, 15 Dec 2016 00:19:30 GMT

Ahhhh, lovely. Another "board police" thread, demanding that the readers act a certain way.

The only person that you can control is yourself.

To expect to control others because you ( general meaning) demand everybody else must respond in a certain way, is like trying to hold back the ocean with a spoon.

It is pointless, unrealistic, and is just simply not going to happen.

Re: Fair is Fair

Moonchilde — Thu, 15 Dec 2016 00:22:33 GMT

@QVCkitty1 wrote:

@Moonchilde wrote:
Fair? I'm not sure how the concept of "fair" works as far as people posting opinions that aren't "nice", agreeable, warm and fuzzy.

I think it's perfectly valid, in a thread where a poster pitches a hissyfit because they didn't get "a" package when they were supposed to and their "Christmas was ruined", that others express opinions that presents and material things have traditionally not been THE point of Xmas. It's plausible to believe that a person who comes unglued about a missing package is only into the material aspect of Xmas, and yes, needs to be reminded of why *most* people celebrate.

In poor families, low on their Christmas celebrations is "stuff". What's important for them is being together, having a good time with enough food to eat and at least 1-2 small gifts for their children. Others, rich and poor and in-between, add religious observance into the mix.

The forums are about expressing one's opinions. Although some posters think they *should*, 100% of the time, be about positive thinking, love and lifting everyone up all the time - so anyone who posts otherwise in their opinions should just shut up, keep quiet, go away, etc because they're not being "nice."

No forum anywhere works that way unless it is a faith-based group. The forums are what they are. "Be nice", Don't be mean/nasty", "Always be supportive of everyone", etc. are the POV and outlook of some. But they have no power to coerce, control, nanny or "shame" other posters, though they try - for the best reasons of course.

Everyone's opinion has a right to be stated, like it or not, think it's mean or not. It's part of the give-and-take that's a discussion forum.
God forbid I ask anyone to be nice, I know better, my point was, why aggravate youself by reading posts, that bore, infuriate or otherwise just tick you off ?

It may be your opinion/supposition that a poster who posts something you disapprove of is aggravated, bored, infuriated or annoyed, but that isn't necessarily the case, that's just your opinion of their post.

Re: Fair is Fair

Moonchilde — Thu, 15 Dec 2016 00:24:55 GMT

@occasionalrain wrote:
@sunshine45 wrote:
it is easier to avoid a post that lets you know CLEARLY what it is about.......
To me, teaser threads are inconsiderate, rude.

And the gullible and inexperienced don't recognize them as such and plunge in with both feet.

Re: Fair is Fair

Wayne-QVC — Thu, 15 Dec 2016 00:58:44 GMT

This post has been removed by QVC because it's unkind

Re: Fair is Fair

makena — Thu, 15 Dec 2016 06:16:28 GMT

@QVCkitty1 that's a fair enough request. After all, if the person is in an agitated state already, any comment other than sympathetic to their situation would just add to their stress ... so would one really want to do that? In this case, thinking twice (or three times) before responding might be helpful. Or maybe just bypass commenting entirely.

Re: Fair is Fair

hckynut — Thu, 15 Dec 2016 07:41:23 GMT

The definition of the word fair is subjective. Even in business with equal partners sounds like fair profits would be 50/50, right? No, 1 of the "partners" has invested more time and more money.

Is 50/50 fair? Not in my book.

hckynut(john)

Re: Fair is Fair

Moonchilde — Thu, 15 Dec 2016 07:42:35 GMT

@makena wrote:
@QVCkitty1 that's a fair enough request. After all, if the person is in an agitated state already, any comment other than sympathetic to their situation would just add to their stress ... so would one really want to do that? In this case, thinking twice (or three times) before responding might be helpful. Or maybe just bypass commenting entirely.

Or maybe putting on big girl undies and understanding how a discussion forum operates before one posts.

Re: Fair is Fair

QueenDanceALot — Fri, 16 Dec 2016 01:52:05 GMT

@QVCkitty1 wrote:
I was just thinking, there are always a lot of responses to complaints about QVC, that say change the channel. OK, fair enough, but isn't it also fair to say avoid the posts that you know will annoy or frustrate you ? I mean live and let live. If someone says their Christmas is ruined, it is most likely just temporary venting over a situation that at this point is out of their control. I mean some people were accusing these folks of not knowing the meaningI of Christmas, kind of harsh. No one forces us to read any of these posts. I guess I'm just asking to be fair for the holidays. 🎄🎄

It's not for me to tell anyone how to post. And it's not for anyone else to tell me how to post. Well, except for the moderators here (and are they always "fair"?)

And I reject the yearly admonition on the board that we be "nice" or "kind" or whatever because, after all, it's Christmas. As though it's more acceptable to be not "nice" or "kind" the rest of the year.

Post what you like, respond how you like, and deal with the response.

Re: Fair is Fair

makena — Thu, 15 Dec 2016 19:21:33 GMT

@Moonchilde wrote:
@makena wrote:
@QVCkitty1 that's a fair enough request. After all, if the person is in an agitated state already, any comment other than sympathetic to their situation would just add to their stress ... so would one really want to do that? In this case, thinking twice (or three times) before responding might be helpful. Or maybe just bypass commenting entirely.

Or maybe putting on big girl undies and understanding how a discussion forum operates before one posts.

There are all ways to look at things. One needs to open their mind and maybe take the high road now and then. Then there are those who think their way of seeing things is the only way. High road/low road. You choose.

Re: Fair is Fair

LilacTree — Thu, 15 Dec 2016 19:24:11 GMT

@hckynut wrote:

The definition of the word fair is subjective. Even in business with equal partners sounds like fair profits would be 50/50, right? No, 1 of the "partners" has invested more time and more money.

Is 50/50 fair? Not in my book.

hckynut(john)

@hckynut

OK John. Here's a scenario. Four folks go out to lunch. Two order steaks and two order a salad. Should the tab be split evenly?

Re: Fair is Fair

Moonchilde — Thu, 15 Dec 2016 19:28:41 GMT

@makena wrote:
@Moonchilde wrote:
@makena wrote:
@QVCkitty1 that's a fair enough request. After all, if the person is in an agitated state already, any comment other than sympathetic to their situation would just add to their stress ... so would one really want to do that? In this case, thinking twice (or three times) before responding might be helpful. Or maybe just bypass commenting entirely.

Or maybe putting on big girl undies and understanding how a discussion forum operates before one posts.
There are all ways to look at things. One needs to open their mind and maybe take the high road now and then. Then there are those who think their way of seeing things is the only way. High road/low road. You choose.

I choose neither 100% of the time. There is a middle road, which is, I think, most people's road. I feel an open mind would understand this, and human nature. In my experience on all forums (not just this one) over 23 years, it's the '100% high road' people who behave as if their way is the only way and feel/claim moral superiority. It has never impressed me.

Re: Fair is Fair

febe1 — Thu, 15 Dec 2016 19:43:12 GMT

I get a real uncomfortable feeling when I read a control post. I, too, have belonged to many forums, sometimes with mods, sometimes not. I think we have a strict mod control on this board. I'm dismayed when I see so many posts poofed or moved.

I believe a poster should feel free to write her opinion in the way and manner she chooses, and the on-the-job mods will do their job.