topic Re: On Line Harrasment in Community Chat

On Line Harrasment

I am still oxox — Mon, 26 Sep 2016 12:12:05 GMT

I have been chatting in a particular chat room since 1997, and people come and go. Recently a chatter who is a known "troll" has taken to attack me, first it was calling me name, then calling my late Mom horrible things, he has now found my name, and address, we had a friend in common on FB.

He is now broadcasting my name in the room at naseaum, i have altered the company that runs the room and have screen shots of the abusive behavior

What is my next step, my DH says stay out of the room and I really want to take it further. I know the posters real name

Thanks and please keep your negative answers out of this

Re: On Line Harrasment

bri20 — Mon, 26 Sep 2016 12:18:58 GMT

He should be banned permanently. I would stay out of the room until he is banned.

He knows your address? Aren't you concerned?

Re: On Line Harrasment

Qshopper1991 — Mon, 26 Sep 2016 12:20:33 GMT

I agree with your husband. Just stay out of chat rooms. Instead, talk to your hubby. Your time is better spent with him any way

Re: On Line Harrasment

I am still oxox — Mon, 26 Sep 2016 12:25:15 GMT

Of course I am concerned but he is an on line stalker I know he will not confront any one in real life, but most of the stuff that is said in the room goes into this air with no reactions most people have his number us ids on ignore.

@bri20 wrote:
He should be banned permanently. I would stay out of the room until he is banned.

He knows your address? Aren't you concerned?

Re: On Line Harrasment

bri20 — Mon, 26 Sep 2016 12:27:40 GMT

I would stay out of the chat room.

I would never participate in a chat room using my real name either.

Re: On Line Harrasment

Buck-i-Nana — Mon, 26 Sep 2016 12:29:48 GMT

This is a nasty situation and I feel for you. I was in a similar situation many years ago, except I was the moderator on the forum where it happened. I can tell you that even if you get this person banned from the chat room where he is directly harrassing you, if he's bent on causing you problems he will continue whether you are aware or not. He can, and probably will post your personal info in other places and it could get even nastier once he's banned.

In my case, the psycho essentially posted an invite to anyone interested to "pay me a visit" posting my address, that I lived alone and didn't believe in guns. I went to my local police department with the print outs and back then, there were no cyber stalking laws in place. They advised that I let my neighbors know about the potential threat and ask they keep an eye on my home and have a security system installed. The police did up their patrols in my area as well.

I don't want to scare you, but I did want to share what I was told.

My cyber stalker had a major temper problem that eventually ended up getting him arrested for assault - not on me thank heavens.

Re: On Line Harrasment

I am still oxox — Mon, 26 Sep 2016 12:36:57 GMT

I don't use my real name, he had a mutual friend on FB, he had to of gotten the name from there since it is the only place I use my full maiden name not the initial.

@bri20 wrote:
I would stay out of the chat room.

I would never participate in a chat room using my real name either.

Re: On Line Harrasment

Goldengate8361 — Mon, 26 Sep 2016 12:40:33 GMT

Never underestimate the many varieties of "crazy!" I would urge you to stay away! Let it go. Engaging a crazy person - in any way - just fuels the flames! I bet if you ignore the troll, they will move on.

Re: On Line Harrasment

I am still oxox — Mon, 26 Sep 2016 12:41:16 GMT

I live in a very small town with a very pro active plice force, good thing I live ina 4 unit building with a cop and a retired cop in the same unit .

Re: On Line Harrasment

Buck-i-Nana — Mon, 26 Sep 2016 12:45:27 GMT

@I am still oxox wrote:
I live in a very small town with a very pro active plice force, good thing I live ina 4 unit building with a cop and a retired cop in the same unit .

That is fortunate. I would let them know what is going on so they can be even more vigilant.

Re: On Line Harrasment

bonnielu — Mon, 26 Sep 2016 12:53:55 GMT

Stay out of the room. That is number one. If he goes beyond that room to annoy you then you should report him. But I would give it awhile before I do this and see if he loses his "target" and then has to move on.

I had a similar situation. I use FaceBook for a game that I play before I go to bed. I have friends who make attempts to "friend me" and I usually resist and avoid the contact. Heck I have a phone and an email address, I don't have to tell all to the world. However one friend was really after me so I agreed and she is very political which I did not want to get into. We are on opposite sides so I finally made one pass at my opinion. Then it started. A friend of a friend I guess got into it and started after ME and fortunately my friend posted a message that she didn't like how he was on the attack and knocked him off and then told me to change my password. There was an attempt to steal my name and use it posting things that were NOT ME, It all did stop because of her fast action. What can I say. I have since taken just about everyone off of facebook and I do not accept any requests. My hubby is not even allowed to befriend me online.

Re: On Line Harrasment

KentuckyWoman — Mon, 26 Sep 2016 13:00:58 GMT

I have to say I agree with your husband. Get out of that chat room. He sounds like a head case and he will only become more aggressive in his attacks. I would be freaking out if he had my name and address. Good luck.

Re: On Line Harrasment

Mmsfoxxie — Mon, 26 Sep 2016 18:56:05 GMT

I will never do chat rooms....seems too easy to unintentionally give out too much personal information on yourself. Even on here you can find yourself talking too much.

I see quite often where posters give out their email addresses because you feel you 'know' the poster. I gave mine out once and turns out that's the very person that, because of some unfortunate accusations toward me, I don't interact with anymore. We have to remember, we really don't each other.

Re: On Line Harrasment

Nuttmeg — Mon, 26 Sep 2016 13:09:35 GMT

@KentuckyWoman wrote:
I have to say I agree with your husband. Get out of that chat room. He sounds like a head case and he will only become more aggressive in his attacks. I would be freaking out if he had my name and address. Good luck.

I also agree with your DH. I would walk away from this chat room. All things come to an end. You have had nearly 20 years.

Re: On Line Harrasment

nunya — Mon, 26 Sep 2016 13:24:20 GMT

Stay out of the chatroom, he will move on to some poor other person. Why are the admins allowing that to happen?

Re: On Line Harrasment

SaRina — Mon, 26 Sep 2016 14:05:38 GMT

@I am still oxox wrote:
I have been chatting in a particular chat room since 1997, and people come and go. Recently a chatter who is a known "troll" has taken to attack me, first it was calling me name, then calling my late Mom horrible things, he has now found my name, and address, we had a friend in common on FB.
He is now broadcasting my name in the room at naseaum, i have altered the company that runs the room and have screen shots of the abusive behavior
What is my next step, my DH says stay out of the room and I really want to take it further. I know the posters real name

Thanks and please keep your negative answers out of this

Listen to your DH. I'd run as far and as fast as I could away from this source of trouble. Put your pride and ego aside -- it's always ok to walk away from lunatics. If you are absent from this chat room, he will have no target and lose interest. If you poke this troll in any way, be prepared for the consequences. Ask yourself....Is it worth it?

Re: On Line Harrasment

Allegheny — Mon, 26 Sep 2016 14:09:37 GMT

You been given sound advice by your DH and many posters. Just back out of the chat room for a while. I am sure you have heard the phrases "don't feed the troll" and "don't cut off your nose to spite your face"

I understand that this individual's harassment towards you is making you to want to react. Stepping away is not our normal reaction and is hard to accept but may times is the best course of action.

If his/her threatening behavior escalates outside this chatroom you should then consider further, perhaps, legal actions.

Re: On Line Harrasment

Tinkrbl44 — Mon, 26 Sep 2016 13:57:20 GMT

@I am still oxox

Unfortunately, you have learned the hard way what people really need to keep in mind ..... NOTHING is private on the internet. Once you put anything about yourself "out there", there's just no telling who might figure out how to access it, and there are crazy people everywhere.

Facebook is not private, regardless of what so-called "settings" you use.

Re: On Line Harrasment

Mz iMac — Mon, 26 Sep 2016 14:14:10 GMT

@Tinkrbl44 wrote:

Facebook is not private, regardless of what so-called "settings" you use.

Re: On Line Harrasment

Mz iMac — Mon, 26 Sep 2016 14:23:34 GMT

@I am still oxox

Cyber stalking as well as cyber harrasment is a CRIME. Not sure if Federal or State. You will need to report to your local PD. Make copies/print outs of your PROOF.

In the meantime, you need to seriously reframe from posting personal info on the WWW. And while you're at it, get in touch by phone & email to all the websites that you personally submitted your personal info. Have them remove the info like yesterday!!!! Keep a paper trail.