topic Re: Do You Hide Your Purchases in Community Chat

Do You Hide Your Purchases

Jordan2 — Wed, 08 Jun 2016 00:47:29 GMT

My elderly mother lives with me and I take care of her. I do a lot of online shopping. Now my mother is a little hard of hearing, but wouldn't't you know she always hears the doorbell! She'll say "did you get a package", I'll say no! I find I sneak things into my room when she's not looking! Fess up do you hide your purchases from your family?

Re: Do You Hide Your Purchases

RoughDraft — Wed, 08 Jun 2016 00:50:16 GMT

I can't think of one reason for me to hide any of my purchases. I earned it.

Re: Do You Hide Your Purchases

jaxs mom — Wed, 08 Jun 2016 00:51:24 GMT

Only if it's a gift for one of them.

Re: Do You Hide Your Purchases

Mz iMac — Wed, 08 Jun 2016 00:51:46 GMT

It's nobody d@mn business how I spend MY $$$$$.

Re: Do You Hide Your Purchases

Day1128 — Wed, 08 Jun 2016 00:52:59 GMT

Sometimes!

Re: Do You Hide Your Purchases

croemer — Wed, 08 Jun 2016 00:55:24 GMT

Re: Do You Hide Your Purchases

MyGirlsMom — Wed, 08 Jun 2016 00:55:52 GMT

As Jaxx's mom posted, if it's for one of my family..

..or I'm putting together a room and I haven't gotten everything together. When i did the guest bathroom, I ordered switchplate covers, I "hid them" until I had received all the other things I bought .

Re: Do You Hide Your Purchases

ANewHue — Wed, 08 Jun 2016 00:56:24 GMT

I never felt I had to. My DH trusts me and knows what a great shopper I am. Besides I never purchase big items, we do it together almost always. I don't run up bills for sure.

Re: Do You Hide Your Purchases

september — Wed, 08 Jun 2016 01:03:27 GMT

No. Many of my purchases these days are things I order from Amazon and are just ordinary purchases that I might make at the market or drugstore if I had more time to shop.

When the holidays roll around, I do have many more special gifts coming my way...but again...these are things I'd have to go out and buy, anyway.

Re: Do You Hide Your Purchases

Sister Golden Hair — Wed, 08 Jun 2016 01:03:38 GMT

@Jordan2 wrote:
My elderly mother lives with me and I take care of her. I do a lot of online shopping. Now my mother is a little hard of hearing, but wouldn't't you know she always hears the doorbell! She'll say "did you get a package", I'll say no! I find I sneak things into my room when she's not looking! Fess up do you hide your purchases from your family?

@Jordan2 Why do you want to hide your purchases? Do you use your own money to buy products? If so, why would your Mother care what you buy?

I really don't understand.

Re: Do You Hide Your Purchases

Jordan2 — Wed, 08 Jun 2016 01:06:46 GMT

I don't spend more than I can afford, I just don't feel like I have to explain my purchases to my mother. I just feel it's better if she doesn't know.

Re: Do You Hide Your Purchases

Desertdi — Wed, 08 Jun 2016 01:07:11 GMT

Yes........when my ma was alive, she firmly believed that a "working woman" only needed a black skirt, and a brown skirt, and 5 white blouses.

Re: Do You Hide Your Purchases

libbyannE — Wed, 08 Jun 2016 01:08:19 GMT

Never. My husband and I both had successful careers and never questioned each other's purchases. We took early retirement after working mostly six days a week for more than 30 years, and we still give each other that kind of respect and freedom. He doesn't count my Dooneys, haha, and I don!'t count his cars!

Re: Do You Hide Your Purchases

homedecor1 — Wed, 08 Jun 2016 01:08:57 GMT

@Jordan2

I agree with @Sister Golden Hair! You're mother lives with YOU its your business how or what you spend your $$$ on! (Unless she lives with you for financial reasons) I'd be very resentful if I had to "hide" my purchases of that person.

Although, spouse always says to me when he does our checkbook "gee will these 2.59 EZ pays ever end"! Then I laugh because I use automated ordering system and it defaults to EZ pay when offered! I just laugh "oh another few months!"

Re: Do You Hide Your Purchases

HappyDaze — Wed, 08 Jun 2016 01:12:03 GMT

I have never understood why anyone feels the need to do that unless, of course, like someone else said, if it was a gift for someone in the household. Unless the issue is you know you can't afford it or know you are overspending or you are using someone else's money to buy the items and they don't know it?

Re: Do You Hide Your Purchases

GCR18 — Wed, 08 Jun 2016 01:15:17 GMT

Occasionally I have. When the packages come, I put them inside the door. They usually stay there until I open them. If I have someone coming over, I put them in the bedroom and shut the door. I don't feel the need to disclose what's in them.

Re: Do You Hide Your Purchases

Pearlee — Wed, 08 Jun 2016 01:16:15 GMT

Frankly, I couldn't live that way - hiding my purchases. I just would never do that, nor live with someone where I felt I had to do that.

But this thread reminded me of an incident 30 yrs. ago when I went shopping with a friend who routinely hid packages from her husband and asked me that time to hide them in the trunk of my car, telling me she'd pick them up from me some other time.

I thought way back then, "I couldn't live this way!"

Re: Do You Hide Your Purchases

Sister Golden Hair — Wed, 08 Jun 2016 01:17:39 GMT

@Jordan2 wrote:
I don't spend more than I can afford, I just don't feel like I have to explain my purchases to my mother. I just feel it's better if she doesn't know.

@Jordan2 I don't know how old your Mother is but some of them went through the depression and some things seem foolish.

If it is a worry to your Mother then I would have the packages delivered to my work. Or a friend's home.

Re: Do You Hide Your Purchases

Marianne1 — Wed, 08 Jun 2016 01:19:45 GMT

Fortunately, not at this point in my life.

However, there was a point in my life when I did, because of the reaction I feared from my first husband.

Let's just say, he was not a nice man.

Re: Do You Hide Your Purchases

PA Mom-mom — Wed, 08 Jun 2016 01:29:33 GMT

If you are taking care of your elderly mother, God bless you! That is the most noble of occupations! Many of us who have been there know that older parents sometimes change in their outlook and personalities. They feel their control slipping away, both physically and mentally. And, as a result, try to control what they can. I would suggest maintaining a good sense of humor. And, yes, if the packages upset her, you either have to hide them or try to have a conversation with her about what you are purchasing. Perhaps you could make her a part of the shopping. I don't know your situation, but these are just suggestions from someone who has had a similar experience.