topic Re: A wake up call to being kind. in Community Chat

A wake up call to being kind.

June222 — Fri, 25 Sep 2015 00:07:11 GMT

Sometimes we need a wake up call..... what mean words we say or even think about someone else not knowing their circumstances can be so hurtful. This Mom touched my heart.

Mom Buys Coffee For Women Who Mocked Her In Line

http://www.msn.com/en-us/lifestyle/family/mom-buys-coffee-for-women-who-mocked-her-in-line/ar-AAeJox8

Re: A wake up call to being kind.

skuggles — Fri, 25 Sep 2015 00:30:50 GMT

I am not always kind, so this is an exemplary reminder.

Re: A wake up call to being kind.

dooBdoo — Fri, 25 Sep 2015 00:32:13 GMT

Thanks, @June222! I love this!

I hope it's okay, I wanted to post the article for those who don't like links:

"How do you deal when you overhear someone say something nasty about you? I’m the type to roll my eyes and walk away, but if you catch me on a bad day, watch out—venom and vitriol shall spew. (Hold my earrings!)

From now on, however, I’m going to try and take a page out of Dianne Hoffmeyer’s book.

The Michigan mom was standing in line at Tim Hortons with her 22-month-old daughter when she overheard two women saying mean things about her appearance; things like, "Oh look at her hair, it's nasty looking and the roots are coming through," and "Oh she's a whale, oh the whale needs to eat."

Their cruel words cut deep.

"I instantly started to cry, because it hurts. I don't know the women. I don't know why they would choose to say something like that,” she said.

But then, Dianne did something few of us would even consider: She bought the two women coffee.

Her reasoning? Dianne was proud of having recently lost 177 pounds, and she wanted to set a good example for her daughter.

After posting her encounter on Facebook, thousands of strangers rallied in Dianne’s corner. The post now has more than 166,000 likes and Dianne has recieved at least 94,000 friends requests from all over the world.

So what would she do if she encountered these coffee shop trolls again?

"I'd like to buy them another cup of coffee, and talk to them. And explain to them how it made me feel."

Let’s all be more like Dianne today! The world can use a little more kindness."

Re: A wake up call to being kind.

Moonchilde — Fri, 25 Sep 2015 00:39:04 GMT

Or, if not to always make a concerted effort to "be kind", make an effort NOT to be UNkind. There is a difference. The women in this scenario were "practicing unkindness" as a part of who they are. Hopefully, they will discover at some point that it doesn't really get you much, if anything.

Re: A wake up call to being kind.

blackhole99 — Fri, 25 Sep 2015 00:39:46 GMT

Well good for Dianne, but I would have turned around and gave those bi--hes the finger. If you think calling them out with a cup of coffee made any difference to them think again, they would have remembered the finger.

Re: A wake up call to being kind.

Moonchilde — Fri, 25 Sep 2015 00:44:57 GMT

@baker wrote:
Well good for Dianne, but I would have turned around and gave those bi--hes the finger. If you think calling them out with a cup of coffee made any difference to them think again, they would have remembered the finger.

But they would have chalked it up to "that kind of person" and felt righteous in their trashing.

What I might have done is whip out my phone and take pix or a video clip of them, quote them, and spread their *faces* far and wide in social media along with their words.

Re: A wake up call to being kind.

skuggles — Fri, 25 Sep 2015 00:46:59 GMT

@blackhole99 I can't believe this didnt have any effect on them. But I totally get where you're coming from.

Re: A wake up call to being kind.

dooBdoo — Fri, 25 Sep 2015 00:48:09 GMT

baker wrote:
Well good for Dianne, but I would have turned around and gave those bi--hes the finger. If you think calling them out with a cup of coffee made any difference to them think again, they would have remembered the finger.

I respectfully disagree, @blackhole99. In my experience, responding to unkindness with unkindness only reinforces the negative and implies everyone moves through the world in an unpleasant retaliatory way. The way someone treats us, acts toward us, or talks about us puts their character on exhibit, not ours.

Re: A wake up call to being kind.

dooBdoo — Fri, 25 Sep 2015 00:51:02 GMT

@Moonchilde wrote:
@baker wrote:
Well good for Dianne, but I would have turned around and gave those bi--hes the finger. If you think calling them out with a cup of coffee made any difference to them think again, they would have remembered the finger.

But they would have chalked it up to "that kind of person" and felt righteous in their trashing.

What I might have done is whip out my phone and take pix or a video clip of them, quote them, and spread their *faces* far and wide in social media along with their words.

I agree with the first sentence, @Moonchilde, but not the second one. In this day and age, that might cause a physical altercation and put everyone in jeopardy.

Re: A wake up call to being kind.

MaggieMack — Fri, 25 Sep 2015 00:53:42 GMT

One more finger would have been lost in the thousands they surely have received or will. That moment where she opened the blinds just a little with the coffee and let the light come flowing in is likely to stay with them forever.

Re: A wake up call to being kind.

Dusty1 — Fri, 25 Sep 2015 00:54:26 GMT

Those women have most likely been mean girls all of their lives & I truly don't think that they will change because this woman supposedly paid for their coffee. In my experience, they walked off laughing at her for being naive enough to try & buy their kindness.

Re: A wake up call to being kind.

nunya — Fri, 25 Sep 2015 01:00:22 GMT

If and most likely when it happens to their own children, they will think before they speak.

It's a tough way to learn a lesson.

Re: A wake up call to being kind.

Wayne-QVC — Fri, 25 Sep 2015 01:00:32 GMT

This post has been removed by QVC because profanity was used.

Re: A wake up call to being kind.

blackhole99 — Fri, 25 Sep 2015 01:09:04 GMT

Sorry ladies, I don't buy into all this goodness and light stuff. They will just think this Dianne is a fool and move onto their next victim.

Re: A wake up call to being kind.

Moonchilde — Fri, 25 Sep 2015 01:18:56 GMT

@dooBdoo wrote:
@Moonchilde wrote:
@baker wrote:
Well good for Dianne, but I would have turned around and gave those bi--hes the finger. If you think calling them out with a cup of coffee made any difference to them think again, they would have remembered the finger.

But they would have chalked it up to "that kind of person" and felt righteous in their trashing.

What I might have done is whip out my phone and take pix or a video clip of them, quote them, and spread their *faces* far and wide in social media along with their words.

I agree with the first sentence, @Moonchilde, but not the second one. In this day and age, that might cause a physical altercation and put everyone in jeopardy.

But revenge fantasies are fun! 😜

Re: A wake up call to being kind.

Adelina — Fri, 25 Sep 2015 01:24:40 GMT

What I find particularly interesting about this, is that some see the hurtful, unkind, intolerant and insensitive in other people and circumstances, but display little themselves or, rather, do not see it in themselves.....

Re: A wake up call to being kind.

nunya — Fri, 25 Sep 2015 01:25:13 GMT

I couldn't imagine saying things like that to someone with a little child for no reason. Poor things must have nothing better to do.

I honestly don't know what my reaction would be, I want to think I'd be the better person ... but my gut tells me I'd be hauled away

Re: A wake up call to being kind.

dmod nj — Fri, 25 Sep 2015 02:09:03 GMT

@NUNYA wrote:
I couldn't imagine saying things like that to someone with a little child for no reason. Poor things must have nothing better to do.

I honestly don't know what my reaction would be, I want to think I'd be the better person ... but my gut tells me I'd be hauled away

___________________________________________________

nunya, I'll have your bail money ready if you'll have mine ready? I don't seem to be able to return to "unbolded" print. Sorry.

Re: A wake up call to being kind.

nunya — Fri, 25 Sep 2015 02:12:49 GMT

@dmod nj wrote:

nunya, I'll have your bail money ready if you'll have mine ready? I don't seem to be able to return to "unbolded" print. Sorry.

Of course!!....that's what my swear jar money is for!!

Re: A wake up call to being kind.

NycVixen — Fri, 25 Sep 2015 02:37:23 GMT

IMO any reaction greatly depends on how many times the person has been on the receiving end of nasty behavior from others.

Some of us have just been through too much and the idea of buying coffee for individuals like this is near to impossible. Bless that lady's heart but I honestly would of never reacted like that.

I think the fact that she is a mom and her daughter was with her is a big factor. If I was a mom I think I would see everything differently. I can only hope that having children has such a positive impact on how I react and view not only past but future negative experiences. I commend her for being such a role model for her daughter, which I believe is why she reacted how she did.