topic Re: Rock Bottom part 2 in Community Chat

Rock Bottom part 2

hsawaknow — Sun, 19 Jul 2015 20:55:58 GMT

I have been trying to hang in there. The first thing I did was file court papers to get more hours with my son. My next thing is a therepy appointment and the psychytryst appointments. The last thing is l have developed in the last 2 weeks a terrible amount of fear which has caused me to have an upset stomach and loss of appettite. I tread everything and afraid of the unknow and in a constant state of panic and worry. Oh and fear. My sister invited me out for a visit to Colorado and even invited me to live there. I currently rent a room in California. My 2 older chilldren still wont speak to me and my youngest son turns 9 in week Im at a crossroad and I dont like it. Im not a go getter or self starter. I havent worked in 16 years and went from living with my parents to getting married. Anyone have any advice. Im in a fragile state. Have been for about 4 weeks now. Please help if you can or have experience. Thank you so much.

Re: Rock Bottom part 2

deepwaterdotter — Sun, 19 Jul 2015 21:05:32 GMT

Have you considered checking into a residential facility where you could get in-house professional attention?

Re: Rock Bottom part 2

hsawaknow — Sun, 19 Jul 2015 21:06:47 GMT

No, I dont even know what that is.

Re: Rock Bottom part 2

nunya — Sun, 19 Jul 2015 21:11:32 GMT

Maybe living with your sister would be good. Sometimes, it is easier to tackle things when you have someone to guide you and understand. Then it's not all that scary.

Wish you luck in whatever you decide.

Re: Rock Bottom part 2

LyndaGee — Sun, 19 Jul 2015 21:12:23 GMT

Sounds like you have a nice sister. Are you up to a visit to Colorado?

I am so sorry you are having such a rough time. Hope things turn around for you soon.

Re: Rock Bottom part 2

dooBdoo — Sun, 19 Jul 2015 21:15:52 GMT

@hsawaknow, I've been there (desperate anxiety, depression) and although it's not always exactly the same I think I know how you feel. In my opinion, you need to tell a trusted counselor or physician -- right away -- that you need help getting started. Just from my experience, you need to feel more grounded before considering something major like a move to another state.

In many cases, even though learning other more natural methods usually works best in the long run, getting on some sort of medication is the best way to begin (there are several good meds, I'm not a doc or pharmacist so I won't recommend anything).

Please, reach out to someone in your community, a medical or mental health professional you trust, now. Don't postpone it any longer, okay? Allow them to guide you.

I know it hurts. And it feels hopeless -- but it's not. You're in my thoughts and heartfelt prayers.

Re: Rock Bottom part 2

hsawaknow — Sun, 19 Jul 2015 21:16:04 GMT

Thank you for your encourgement. I would like to visit her once the court rules on a visitation scedule with my son.

Re: Rock Bottom part 2

hsawaknow — Sun, 19 Jul 2015 21:20:57 GMT

Thank you Doo, I do take a anti depressant. Maybe I need something else. Your right about a move. Too major right now. Thanks for all your advice.

Re: Rock Bottom part 2

tansy — Sun, 19 Jul 2015 21:23:59 GMT

Hsawaknow, having a sister as a support system would sure appeal to me. You will make it through this.

Re: Rock Bottom part 2

tansy — Sun, 19 Jul 2015 21:26:14 GMT

I am NOT diagnosing you, hsawaknow, but maybe you should ask if an anti-anxiety med would work for you.

Re: Rock Bottom part 2

muttmom — Sun, 19 Jul 2015 21:26:21 GMT

I have no advice to offer but I hope you are able to see your son more often.

Your sister sounds like a special lady.

Re: Rock Bottom part 2

dooBdoo — Sun, 19 Jul 2015 21:29:28 GMT

hsawaknow wrote:
Thank you Doo, I do take a anti depressant. Maybe I need something else. Your right about a move. Too major right now. Thanks for all your advice.

You're welcome, @hsawaknow. What I'm thinking of is something specifically for anxiety. There are several good options which work quickly, and I'll bet if your doctor knew how much you're suffering s/he would want to help.

Re: Rock Bottom part 2

ShowMe — Sun, 19 Jul 2015 23:51:44 GMT

Oh dBd.....where were youwhen I was going through that other horrible time in my life....don't know if that was worse, or if what I'm going through now is worse. But, if it will helpOP, you are so full of helpful suggestions........and if she's smart, she will heed your advice.......

Re: Rock Bottom part 2

Lucky Charm — Mon, 20 Jul 2015 00:17:26 GMT

The offer from your sister in CO sounds good, as long as you two have a great relationship as it stands.

What you are experiencing may be too much for her and you to be able to live under the same roof. How often are you together? You may talk to her 2/3 times a day, but living in her home is a whole different ball game. I mean that in the sincerest way.

I think it best to be around for your little one. The relationship is still there and it CAN get better. If it takes meds, yoga, prayer or just putting one foot in front of the other, make yourself available to him and make the best of it you possible can.

It could be a simple as going swimming together/day at the beach, cooking pizzas or tacos together, go carts/amusement parks or if all you can afford is tons of Play Doh, go for it. Just do it.

Your other children will see that you are taking him under your wing and that may trigger some long lost feelings for you.

I hope so.

Re: Rock Bottom part 2

feline groovy — Mon, 20 Jul 2015 03:40:35 GMT

@NUNYA wrote:
Maybe living with your sister would be good. Sometimes, it is easier to tackle things when you have someone to guide you and understand. Then it's not all that scary.

Wish you luck in whatever you decide.

YES; a new start in a new (and wonderful) state - when you're ready.

Where most things (rents included) are cheaper than in CA. 8)

Re: Rock Bottom part 2

spud188 — Mon, 20 Jul 2015 08:37:08 GMT

Re-read the replies from your last post asking for advice..lots of helpful info that time.

Re: Rock Bottom part 2

NC Bandwagon — Mon, 20 Jul 2015 10:13:23 GMT

Hello, hsawaknow.

I'm sorry that you're going through so many troubles. I hope it gets better for you.

Re: Rock Bottom part 2

RainCityWoman — Mon, 20 Jul 2015 16:42:17 GMT

I'm no expert in social work, but I'll throw in my two cents. If you have a close relationship with your sister, and it seems that you may, I think you would be in a nurturing environment with her at the moment, which is what you need. However, I think while you're there, you also need contact with a professional who can help you work through this and come out on the other side with renewed strength. Depression doesn't get better by itself. May you find happiness once again in your life.

Re: Rock Bottom part 2

SydneyH — Mon, 20 Jul 2015 19:40:11 GMT

@hsawaknow wrote:
I have been trying to hang in there. The first thing I did was file court papers to get more hours with my son. My next thing is a therepy appointment and the psychytryst appointments. The last thing is l have developed in the last 2 weeks a terrible amount of fear which has caused me to have an upset stomach and loss of appettite. I tread everything and afraid of the unknow and in a constant state of panic and worry. Oh and fear. My sister invited me out for a visit to Colorado and even invited me to live there. I currently rent a room in California. My 2 older chilldren still wont speak to me and my youngest son turns 9 in week Im at a crossroad and I dont like it. Im not a go getter or self starter. I havent worked in 16 years and went from living with my parents to getting married. Anyone have any advice. Im in a fragile state. Have been for about 4 weeks now. Please help if you can or have experience. Thank you so much.

You might want to seriously consider at least a long term visit with your sister. Do you have a lawyer helping you with the custody agreement?

Re: Rock Bottom part 2

dooBdoo — Tue, 21 Jul 2015 09:07:08 GMT

Thinking of you today, (((hsawaknow))). I hope you're okay.