topic The Power Of Making People Doubt Themselves in Community Chat

The Power Of Making People Doubt Themselves

javala — Tue, 03 Feb 2015 05:33:41 GMT

http://trinderellas.blogspot.com/2012/08/the-power-of-making-people-doubt.html

Amazing how some people can manipulate others and doubt one own truth....

It is a wonderful gift to have and one must be careful not to let situations rob them of this fine quality.

Some can mingle among others and it would never occur that some would be like what Dr.Phil has exposed as catfish, some want money, others will for various reason try to destroy another's peace of mind, or the good they have within them.

Cyber space is one of the worst place of all to form serious friendship IMHO.

One must not let the Cotton Candy of life have that much control those feelings of dread can linger for hours even days, because even though it is cyber space it was an encounter with an unfamiliar spirit in some cases. on a brighter note there are guardian Angels among us for there must need be opposition in all things.... Isn't it time that some of us learn to discern...

I added excerpts of life experience from this blogger but those who hide behind the screen are not all well meaning beings either...

Example One….

The other week, I took my car in for a service and MOT. To my horror I was quoted £990!!! After my ears had stopped bleeding and heart had jumped back in my mouth, I managed to ask a few questions as to why the price was so high. Pretending I knew what I was talking about I threw around terms like 'warranty' and 'brake fluid' and managed to scale down the 'bottom line' price to £852.

It is important at this point, to note the use of the words 'bottom line.'

Reluctantly I agreed to the work being done, because I needed my car doing quite desperately, unfortunately I was told they'd have to keep it overnight. The following day, I called the garage to make payment and check when my car would be delivered back to me. At this point I spoke to a man called 'Steve,' who told me that with MOT added on the price would be £1100!!!

To put it politely, I queried the price stating I was told the 'bottom line' price would be £852. 'Steve' informed me that he would double check the price and call me back.

Less than half an hour later, 'Nick' called and the following conversation ensued:

Nick: Hi Miss Trinder, your car is ready for drop off.

Me: Right, what about the price query?

Nick: What price query?

Me: The one I had with Steve in your office.

Nick: Miss Trinder there is no one called Steve in our office.

The result of this conversation, left me doubting myself…. had I imagined a robbing ba...stard called Steve????

After getting my car back, and somehow putting down my conversation with 'Steve' down to a bad bun at lunchtime, I thought no more about it. However, having had my car back not more than 10 minutes, a warning light came on so I decided to call back the garage…. I spoke to Steve.

Example 2….

Having recently moved into a new residence, I signed up for a certain energy supply company. After nearly a year of paying my direct debits, I was told I owed them £11,000. I could rant on about the whys and the wherefores of this situation, but the upshot of it was that my money had somehow been going towards paying the bills for another house further down the road. After many many many many many phone calls trying to rectify this error, I was told that I had called to say I had married my neighbour and had moved into his house which is why my payments had been transferred.

This left me wondering…. Did I????

Example 3….

http://trinderellas.blogspot.com/2012/08/the-power-of-making-people-doubt.html

Re: The Power Of Making People Doubt Themselves

newziesuzie — Tue, 03 Feb 2015 17:22:09 GMT

I'm afraid I don't understand the point of this thread.

Re: The Power Of Making People Doubt Themselves

Free2be — Tue, 03 Feb 2015 18:24:00 GMT

The examples are scenarios that people will create as a means to charge more money for a service when they think you will believe it or they will ingratiate themselves somehow to bring you down or harm in some way with imaginary stories which happens online.

The examples are a little extreme. People get fooled all the time by TV ads or internet posters who are less than honest.

Re: The Power Of Making People Doubt Themselves

Johnnyeager — Tue, 03 Feb 2015 18:28:09 GMT

What happened to the Gaslighting thread?

Re: The Power Of Making People Doubt Themselves

occasionalrain — Tue, 03 Feb 2015 18:39:38 GMT

For any repair work an online search is an easy way to determine what it should cost. No need to haggle or pretend to know more than you do.

Re: The Power Of Making People Doubt Themselves

Preds — Tue, 03 Feb 2015 18:42:27 GMT

On 2/3/2015 Johnnyeager said:
What happened to the Gaslighting thread?

It wasn't really here. We didn't see it.

Re: The Power Of Making People Doubt Themselves

Johnnyeager — Tue, 03 Feb 2015 18:43:19 GMT

We've been Gaslighted! (or is it Gaslit?)

Re: The Power Of Making People Doubt Themselves

WenGirl42 — Tue, 03 Feb 2015 18:44:09 GMT

On 2/3/2015 Preds said:
On 2/3/2015 Johnnyeager said:
What happened to the Gaslighting thread?

It wasn't really here. We didn't see it.

Re: The Power Of Making People Doubt Themselves

Preds — Tue, 03 Feb 2015 18:44:13 GMT

On 2/3/2015 Johnnyeager said:
We've been Gaslighted! (or is it Gaslit?)

You light up my life ...

Re: The Power Of Making People Doubt Themselves

javala — Tue, 03 Feb 2015 18:52:07 GMT

On 2/3/2015 Free2be said:
The examples are scenarios that people will create as a means to charge more money for a service when they think you will believe it or they will ingratiate themselves somehow to bring you down or harm in some way with imaginary stories which happens online.

The examples are a little extreme. People get fooled all the time by TV ads or internet posters who are less than honest.

Some times you will feel helpless when you are aware of another's great loss (death) and at the same time fall prey to those who will have you doubt yourself...

I would like for those in these kinds of situations to realize what happen...

and one should realize even though some how they got caught up in this mess....

not to give one more precious moment of thought nor have guilt for those who are like free radical aka unstable forces, dismiss them....

and if Q will allow me to say there are Angels among us, could even be those we cherish...

I found this song To Where You Are says a lot in a short of words and brings great comfort.

Re: The Power Of Making People Doubt Themselves

Free2be — Tue, 03 Feb 2015 19:05:13 GMT

I sense that the Tinderella blogger doesn't have a solid grasp on reality.

The lyrics to the song are precious.

Re: The Power Of Making People Doubt Themselves

javala — Tue, 03 Feb 2015 19:29:48 GMT

On 2/3/2015 Free2be said:
I sense that the Tinderella blogger doesn't have a solid grasp on reality.

The lyrics to the song are precious.

Well I respect where you are in the scheme of things Free2be, I gather your thinking is along the lines of Christopher Hitchens...

I respect "agency" something we all have but many times the tolerance is not reciprocated...

Love One Another means just that, it is unconditional....

I really don't know who Tinderella blogger is it was the closes example at the time...

of course I have no clue why my other thread disappeared it hit the nail on the head...

of what I was trying to express being dyslexic I use articles but many times they do not represent what I try to say.

I hate to say this but if it wasn't for what I witness to a kind but definite soul I ran into and how this person was to doubt their own instincts, I might not have been able to give what happen a name and in many cases if you cannot identify what is going on you are in most cases never able to call it for what it is, and by being able to name it also free ones self from the nasty components, of one of these things be it gaslighting or catfish

I am hoping the next time when it is in action to recognized it sooner....

Re: The Power Of Making People Doubt Themselves

DoneTryin — Tue, 03 Feb 2015 19:30:08 GMT

Sure about that, OP?

Re: The Power Of Making People Doubt Themselves

javala — Tue, 03 Feb 2015 21:00:17 GMT

On 2/3/2015 VCamp2748 said:
Sure about that, OP?

Yes if it meets this criteria

The intention of the narcissist is to use a systematic way to zone in on the victim’s mental stability, self-confidence, and self-esteem. The result is the victim is no longer able to function in an independent way. They will ask the narcissist for their permission to do normal everyday things, like getting a manicure. The narcissist accomplishes this by withholding factual information from the victim and replacing it with the way they want the information interpreted . The result is the mental balance of the victim is undermined. That is why when subjected to gaslighting long enough; the victim begins to lose their sense of their own self-worth. The victim becomes totally dependent on the narcissist for their sense of reality.

To understand how a person can become a victim of a narcissist, it is important to know that the narcissist has many faces. Different faces are needed by the narcissist as they lead the relationship through each stage. These stages are as follows:

The Idealization Stage

The Devaluation Stage

The Discard Stage

The Idealization Stage:

In the beginning, the narcissist showers the victim with attention and love. They are fun to be with and very charming. Intense bonding begins for the victim, and they honestly believe the narcissist feels the same way. The victim gets hooked by the narcissist’s grandiose praise and attention to them. These hooks create a release of endorphins, which make the victim feel euphoric. They become hooked like an addict to the high they get from the release of their own chemical endorphins. They develop strong emotional attachment to the narcissist. The victim does not realize this is all an illusion created by the narcissist. It seems more real than anything they have ever experienced before. This is the stage the narcissist determines their victim’s strengths and weaknesses which the narcissist will use to their own advantage.

Re: The Power Of Making People Doubt Themselves

deepwaterdotter — Tue, 03 Feb 2015 21:08:19 GMT

Is this similar to a viewer becoming so involved in the fictional storyline of a television program that they start to personally identify with the motives of the characters?

Re: The Power Of Making People Doubt Themselves

Free2be — Tue, 03 Feb 2015 21:15:09 GMT

I wished I'd seen the gaslighting thread. It's a fascinating topic.

Re: The Power Of Making People Doubt Themselves

Free2be — Tue, 03 Feb 2015 21:16:49 GMT

deep, the similarities are that the mind is given over to a fictional or trumped up notion, be it a TV program or the self.

Re: The Power Of Making People Doubt Themselves

javala — Tue, 03 Feb 2015 21:27:10 GMT

On 2/3/2015 deepwaterdotter said:
Is this similar to a viewer becoming so involved in the fictional storyline of a television program that they start to personally identify with the motives of the characters?

During WWII it is a fact that the air wave were subliminally used to pass on messages to those here in the US that were traders here what they needed to do... It is still going on today some have their own web sites, some times unexpected sites are being used.

Every once in a while it is reported when they are caught.

Propaganda never stops and wears many coats...

If people live by core values or principle than they are better to discern....

Interesting events

http://mentalfloss.com/article/25989/10-facts-about-subliminal-messages-you-will-love

Re: The Power Of Making People Doubt Themselves

blackhole99 — Tue, 03 Feb 2015 21:31:49 GMT

I thought some one who played devils advocate was trying to get you to doubt your self yes, but also get you to look at things in a different light. I worked with a person who prided herself in playing the devils advocate and although I thought she was a smart woman, I also thought she was cunning and did not trust her.

Re: The Power Of Making People Doubt Themselves

deepwaterdotter — Tue, 03 Feb 2015 21:47:51 GMT

On 2/3/2015 javala said:
On 2/3/2015 deepwaterdotter said:
Is this similar to a viewer becoming so involved in the fictional storyline of a television program that they start to personally identify with the motives of the characters?

During WWII it is a fact that the air wave were subliminally used to pass on messages to those here in the US that were traders here what they needed to do... It is still going on today some have their own web sites, some times unexpected sites are being used.

Every once in a while it is reported when they are caught.

Propaganda never stops and wears many coats...

If people live by core values or principle than they are better to discern....

Interesting events

http://mentalfloss.com/article/25989/10-facts-about-subliminal-messages-you-will-love

To be "better to discern" should all people "live by" identical "core values or principle", or can each person's values and principles be specific to their beliefs?