topic Re: Public Memorials in Community Chat

Public Memorials

brii — Thu, 08 Jan 2015 22:38:49 GMT

Have you ever gone to a public memorial and lit a candle or left flowers?

I always get so touched when I see how many people leave flowers or candles or a photo.

I remember the sea of flowers after Diana passed away.

Re: Public Memorials

deepwaterdotter — Thu, 08 Jan 2015 22:42:47 GMT

Only on Veterans Day. But just a solemn gathering of people at a memorial statue, no items are left.

Re: Public Memorials

151949 — Thu, 08 Jan 2015 22:48:21 GMT

My parents lived in a small town - they were well known and loved. When they were in an accident that killed my Mom some one set up a memorial at the site - flowers candles and teddy bears etc. When it got all gross and moldy and disgusting the person whose yard it was complained to the police who called me - as their next of kin - and said if we did not clean it up we would be fined heavily. We went and cleaned it and it was an awful job. A week or so later it was back. the police called again and I refused. We had not put up one thing there and I was not going to keep going there to clean it up after it was all filthy and moldy and full of worms and bugs. The police kept and eye out and caught the person doing it so that was all we heard of it.

Do any of the people who are putting this Krap out there in the rain and snow etc ever think about the fact that 1, - that is someones property and they probably don't want it there and 2. the poor bereved family is going to have to clean the filthy thing up? Please - if you do this - at least go back in a reasonable amount of time and clean it up yourself.

Re: Public Memorials

loveschocolate — Thu, 08 Jan 2015 22:52:27 GMT

Years ago, a small family owned supermarket in my area....the owner was robbed and killed. I stopped by, left flowers and a card.....

Re: Public Memorials

Say Nay — Thu, 08 Jan 2015 22:59:07 GMT

When Steve Jobs died I was walking by the Apple store and wrote a note on a post it and put it on the window. There must have been over a thousand notes on their window.

Re: Public Memorials

Irshgrl31201 — Thu, 08 Jan 2015 23:02:19 GMT

On 1/8/2015 happy housewife said:
My parents lived in a small town - they were well known and loved. When they were in an accident that killed my Mom some one set up a memorial at the site - flowers candles and teddy bears etc. When it got all gross and moldy and disgusting the person whose yard it was complained to the police who called me - as their next of kin - and said if we did not clean it up we would be fined heavily. We went and cleaned it and it was an awful job. A week or so later it was back. the police called again and I refused. We had not put up one thing there and I was not going to keep going there to clean it up after it was all filthy and moldy and full of worms and bugs. The police kept and eye out and caught the person doing it so that was all we heard of it.

Do any of the people who are putting this Krap out there in the rain and snow etc ever think about the fact that 1, - that is someones property and they probably don't want it there and 2. the poor bereved family is going to have to clean the filthy thing up? Please - if you do this - at least go back in a reasonable amount of time and clean it up yourself.

I can honestly say I have never thought of it from this perspective.

Re: Public Memorials

Lipstickdiva — Thu, 08 Jan 2015 23:05:32 GMT

On 1/8/2015 Irshgrl31201 said:
On 1/8/2015 happy housewife said:
My parents lived in a small town - they were well known and loved. When they were in an accident that killed my Mom some one set up a memorial at the site - flowers candles and teddy bears etc. When it got all gross and moldy and disgusting the person whose yard it was complained to the police who called me - as their next of kin - and said if we did not clean it up we would be fined heavily. We went and cleaned it and it was an awful job. A week or so later it was back. the police called again and I refused. We had not put up one thing there and I was not going to keep going there to clean it up after it was all filthy and moldy and full of worms and bugs. The police kept and eye out and caught the person doing it so that was all we heard of it.

Do any of the people who are putting this Krap out there in the rain and snow etc ever think about the fact that 1, - that is someones property and they probably don't want it there and 2. the poor bereved family is going to have to clean the filthy thing up? Please - if you do this - at least go back in a reasonable amount of time and clean it up yourself.

I can honestly say I have never thought of it from this perspective.

I've always wondered what happened with all the stuff that was left out like that but it never dawned on me the next of kin would have to go clean it all up.

Re: Public Memorials

brii — Thu, 08 Jan 2015 23:06:26 GMT

On 1/8/2015 happy housewife said:
My parents lived in a small town - they were well known and loved. When they were in an accident that killed my Mom some one set up a memorial at the site - flowers candles and teddy bears etc. When it got all gross and moldy and disgusting the person whose yard it was complained to the police who called me - as their next of kin - and said if we did not clean it up we would be fined heavily. We went and cleaned it and it was an awful job. A week or so later it was back. the police called again and I refused. We had not put up one thing there and I was not going to keep going there to clean it up after it was all filthy and moldy and full of worms and bugs. The police kept and eye out and caught the person doing it so that was all we heard of it.

Do any of the people who are putting this Krap out there in the rain and snow etc ever think about the fact that 1, - that is someones property and they probably don't want it there and 2. the poor bereved family is going to have to clean the filthy thing up? Please - if you do this - at least go back in a reasonable amount of time and clean it up yourself.

That's terrible.

I've seen small ones on the side of the road that have been there for years, it seems.

I'm sure celebrities have someone to make sure that it gets cleaned up in a reasonable amount of time.

Re: Public Memorials

Lipstickdiva — Thu, 08 Jan 2015 23:08:00 GMT

I know on city property, city employees clean up the sites after awhile. My husband used to work for the department that would have to do that.

Re: Public Memorials

lulu2 — Thu, 08 Jan 2015 23:14:06 GMT

My stepbrother was killed on a well traveled expressway. There was a large memorial for awhile following the accident. Months later his widow received a bill from the highway department for clean-up.

Re: Public Memorials

Lipstickdiva — Thu, 08 Jan 2015 23:24:26 GMT

On 1/8/2015 lulu2 said:
My stepbrother was killed on a well traveled expressway. There was a large memorial for awhile following the accident. Months later his widow received a bill from the highway department for clean-up.

That's awful.

Re: Public Memorials

jackthebear — Fri, 09 Jan 2015 00:23:23 GMT

On 1/8/2015 Irshgrl31201 said:
On 1/8/2015 happy housewife said:
My parents lived in a small town - they were well known and loved. When they were in an accident that killed my Mom some one set up a memorial at the site - flowers candles and teddy bears etc. When it got all gross and moldy and disgusting the person whose yard it was complained to the police who called me - as their next of kin - and said if we did not clean it up we would be fined heavily. We went and cleaned it and it was an awful job. A week or so later it was back. the police called again and I refused. We had not put up one thing there and I was not going to keep going there to clean it up after it was all filthy and moldy and full of worms and bugs. The police kept and eye out and caught the person doing it so that was all we heard of it.

Do any of the people who are putting this Krap out there in the rain and snow etc ever think about the fact that 1, - that is someones property and they probably don't want it there and 2. the poor bereaved family is going to have to clean the filthy thing up? Please - if you do this - at least go back in a reasonable amount of time and clean it up yourself.

I can honestly say I have never thought of it from this perspective.

I have thought about that, and thought it was so unattractive with all that stuff just lying there.

Re: Public Memorials

Pippy_1 — Fri, 09 Jan 2015 00:25:11 GMT

Never. I think they are foolish.

Re: Public Memorials

croemer — Fri, 09 Jan 2015 00:31:16 GMT

I think it is beautiful but to fine the family or make them responsible for the clean up is outrageous. If that is the case they should be illegal before the family is held responsible.

Re: Public Memorials

foundinlv — Fri, 09 Jan 2015 00:42:15 GMT

There was a young woman who was killed crossing the street in a crosswalk at a busy intersection not far from where we live and someone placed a memorial on the sidewalk at the corner right next to the traffic light. Candles, pictures, teddy bears......it was a huge distraction to drivers as you couldn't help but see it. Not only that but the woman's relatives would sit there sometimes on the ground. Heart breaking but eventually the county took it all away. There is another intersection where someone on a bicycle got hit and that was chained to a pole and a huge memorial built around it. After the county removed everything, the bicycle remained for many months until finally someone with a pair of bolt cutters cut off the chain.

Re: Public Memorials

foundinlv — Fri, 09 Jan 2015 00:57:06 GMT

On 1/8/2015 happy housewife said:
My parents lived in a small town - they were well known and loved. When they were in an accident that killed my Mom some one set up a memorial at the site - flowers candles and teddy bears etc. When it got all gross and moldy and disgusting the person whose yard it was complained to the police who called me - as their next of kin - and said if we did not clean it up we would be fined heavily. We went and cleaned it and it was an awful job. A week or so later it was back. the police called again and I refused. We had not put up one thing there and I was not going to keep going there to clean it up after it was all filthy and moldy and full of worms and bugs. The police kept and eye out and caught the person doing it so that was all we heard of it.

Do any of the people who are putting this Krap out there in the rain and snow etc ever think about the fact that 1, - that is someones property and they probably don't want it there and 2. the poor bereved family is going to have to clean the filthy thing up? Please - if you do this - at least go back in a reasonable amount of time and clean it up yourself.

Sorry for your loss HH...

Re: Public Memorials

Puzzle Piece — Fri, 09 Jan 2015 01:02:21 GMT

No. I know it's done profusely in other countries and has only been the last decade or so it's done here. All that stuff gets hauled away after a day or two and thrown out. None of it brings back a loved one.

Re: Public Memorials

Kachina624 — Fri, 09 Jan 2015 03:31:49 GMT

It's illegal to remove roadside memorials in New Mexico. If highway workers have to remove it to do maintenance, they have to put it back just as it was. Darn things are all over the place.

Re: Public Memorials

reiki604 — Fri, 09 Jan 2015 03:45:33 GMT

After 9/11 I left flowers at the local fire house where they lost half of their firefighters. I also brought water, towels, and face masks for them to use at the site.

Re: Public Memorials

Kalli — Fri, 09 Jan 2015 03:55:14 GMT

When my nephew was killed on a sharp curve in the road, folks stopped to put flowers, pictures, notes, etc., and the memorial became large. I figured most of it was from his friends and other teens. But after a few days I stopped to look at it more closely and there were notes left from folks who didn't even know him. They were just people who felt bad and had empathy for his grieving family. The thoughts and sentiments expressed in those notes were heartwarming and it was soothing to know that people who'd never met him were reaching out to comfort his loved ones.

The memorial was removed and still some folks added stuff. After months went by, my relatives were called and told they were NOT to put anything there. The caller was from an organization that had a marker at that spot and they were tired of all the stuff being there. They weren't nice about it either. But that rude person apparently didn't know that my relatives hadn't put anything there, ever.

-Kalli