topic Re: Lawnmower Parents: Do You Know Any? in Community Chat

Lawnmower Parents: Do You Know Any?

lolakimono — Wed, 22 Oct 2014 01:36:17 GMT

Here Come The Lawnmower Parents, A Breed That Is More Aggressive Than Helicopter Parents

Every school, every district has them – helicopter parents. These highly ‘involved’ breed of mothers and fathers can be seen constantly fussing and worrying over their brood. Not just bordering, but crossing all the limits of smothering, these parents sometimes cause the child to cower in fear by the mere mention of his or her parent. However, even this breed of over-indulging guardians is being superseded with what is now being referred to as ‘Lawnmower Parents.’

Lawnmower parents are an evolved breed of helicopter parents. Instead of just hovering, fussing and worrying for their kids, these parents take matters in their own hands, even before the ‘issue’ reaches their wards. Essentially, lawnmower parents rally ahead and clear a path for their child before they even take a step, reported Parent Further.

Lawnmower parents try to pre-empt possible problems and try and mow down any and all possible obstacles, perceived or realistic, in their child’s way. Explaining the newly developing epidemic among new parents, behavior experts and authors of Selfish, Scared and Stupid, Kieran Flanagan and Dan Gregory said,

“Lawnmower mums and dad are out there smoothing the way for their kids, giving them a soft, even surface to move forward on.”

According to Primary to High School transition specialist Jenny Atkinson, Lawnmower parents are constantly evolving and unmistakably take on different forms depending on the age of their child and his or hers developmental stage.

“During primary school years, lawnmower parents may take on a more aggressive style; pushing their child’s agenda ahead of other children or trying to have consequences for their child’s actions reduced or dismissed.”

During teenage years, lawnmower parents can reach a level of control that is very stifling for their teen, shared Atkinson. Needless to say, teenagers can and eventually do become resentful about being so micromanaged. They become rebellious and constantly try to ‘do it their own way’, she said.

However, it all begins when the child is just a helpless infant. Lawnmower parenting forms commonly in the form of a parent’s excessive anxiety about their child’s safety, and whether they’re developing “normally” according to medical standards.

Why are parents today so obsessed with their kids? In the good old days, kids used to grow without their parents constantly hovering over them. They used to fall, get hurt and suffer from common illnesses. But the primary difference, then and now, is the access to overwhelming and often contradictory knowledge at the fingertips, revealed a mom who wished to be identified only as Natasha.

“I am just a new mum and my girl isn’t even four weeks old yet. I’m a science graduate so I should know that germs aren’t all that bad. We need germs to build immunity. But even though nothing went wrong during the pregnancy or birth, I am paranoid. [My daughter] is very healthy but I’m worried I will make a mistake and kill my daughter.”

Natasha confessed it is the plethora of information online — especially in the so-called mummy forums — that caused her to become paranoid.

“Instead of following my maternal instinct, I am constantly looking at Dr. Google. I’m scared of [my dog] becoming jealous and killing my daughter, as I’ve heard of dogs suddenly attacking kids. I change her nappy at the slightest bit of wee or poo as I’m scared of giving her an infection or nappy rash. I jump at the slightest noise she makes, even if she’s happy just laying there making noises. I’m scared of driving my daughter in the car.”

All this running around like a paranoid chicken eventually takes a toll on the parents, but they choose to ignore the same for the sake of their wards. Experts are advising parents to simply take it a little easy, when it comes to parenting, reported 4BC. The kids will err and so will you, it’s not the end of the world. When your child becomes capable of doing something, let him or her take the first steps. If they succeed, celebrate. If they fail, encourage them to try a little harder. However, do not try and clear their path for them. Though they may grumble now, your kids will thank you later in their life.

Re: Lawnmower Parents: Do You Know Any?

sylviahomeatlast — Wed, 22 Oct 2014 01:48:17 GMT

no more swings, slides, or merry go rounds---I hate to say it, but my daughter in law, expecting their first, told Mr Sylvia he had to have a flu shot or he can't see the baby----these (swings,etc )parents have taken all the fun out of life

Re: Lawnmower Parents: Do You Know Any?

terrier3 — Wed, 22 Oct 2014 01:49:59 GMT

The school that closed and disinfected because an administrator had visited SOUTH AFRICA - obviously filled to the brim with Lawnmower Parents.

Similar to the other district that closed two schools because someone was on the same plane (but a different flight) than the second nurse diagnosed with ebola.

Re: Lawnmower Parents: Do You Know Any?

sylviahomeatlast — Wed, 22 Oct 2014 01:51:30 GMT

I understand the flu shot thing--I just thought it was kind of strange to demand

Re: Lawnmower Parents: Do You Know Any?

sylviahomeatlast — Wed, 22 Oct 2014 01:52:48 GMT

On 10/21/2014 terrier3 said:
The school that closed and disinfected because an administrator had visited SOUTH AFRICA - obviously filled to the brim with Lawnmower Parents.

Similar to the other district that closed two schools because someone was on the same plane (but a different flight) than the second nurse diagnosed with ebola.

isn't it all so silly?

Re: Lawnmower Parents: Do You Know Any?

terrier3 — Wed, 22 Oct 2014 01:53:18 GMT

I know a mom who lived in Darien CT and refused to take her children on the train into NYC.

She said the train was filled with losers and low lifes...people who couldn't afford drivers or town cars.

She had obviously never been on the train!

Re: Lawnmower Parents: Do You Know Any?

adelle38 — Wed, 22 Oct 2014 02:02:37 GMT

I am so glad I retired from teaching.

Re: Lawnmower Parents: Do You Know Any?

sylviahomeatlast — Wed, 22 Oct 2014 02:10:59 GMT

there were parents in the 90's like that---in public school---we put our youngest in private school and there was none of that??????????

Re: Lawnmower Parents: Do You Know Any?

dooBdoo — Wed, 22 Oct 2014 02:12:52 GMT

I wonder how much of it has arisen from information overload?

Re: Lawnmower Parents: Do You Know Any?

Qwackertoo — Wed, 22 Oct 2014 02:45:52 GMT

One of my daughter's roommates has some lawnmower parents. Heavy duty. As in John Deere tractor mowers. His & Her's model. With the little awning shade and drink holders variety. haha And this girl is a year ahead/older than daughter. This poor girl is under the mistaken belief they are going to let her go tour Europe backpacking style after she graduates next Spring. ONLY IF THEY GO WITH HER. In her dreams. Far Off & Wild Dreams.

She is a very smart girl, was home schooled . . . and they were some of the few who did it "right" and actually knew what they were doing . .. compared to many others I've come across . . . but they can't seem to let go.

Re: Lawnmower Parents: Do You Know Any?

JustJazzmom — Wed, 22 Oct 2014 04:56:52 GMT

Our elementary school out of 6 in our area routinely splits the people graduating in 5th grade to attend 2 different middle schools. With that in mind, one parent insisted that her daughter be with the same kids she was in 5th grade for the 6th grade classes!! Never mind that changing schools and having to make new friends is part of growing up and having new experiences!!

The mother made such a stink about it, that the middle school caved and her daughter had classes with friends that she had made in the elementary school from her neighborhood. That was ridiculous!

Re: Lawnmower Parents: Do You Know Any?

lolakimono — Wed, 22 Oct 2014 10:53:07 GMT

I have heard of parents of this generation-

1) accompanying children on job interviews

2) calling the employer to find out why their child didn't get a job

3) calling the Deans of a college/university to complain (about roommates, classes, teachers, etc.)

Re: Lawnmower Parents: Do You Know Any?

loveschocolate — Wed, 22 Oct 2014 12:18:15 GMT

This is just crazy...

Re: Lawnmower Parents: Do You Know Any?

CouponQueen — Wed, 22 Oct 2014 12:40:34 GMT

I don't blame the parents for wanting a flu shot ...babies are one of the most suseptible..

I wouldn't of demanded though. I would of had a nice honest discussion..

Re: Lawnmower Parents: Do You Know Any?

shesallthat — Wed, 22 Oct 2014 13:04:28 GMT

On 10/22/2014 lolakimono said:
I have heard of parents of this generation-

1) accompanying children on job interviews

2) calling the employer to find out why their child didn't get a job

3) calling the Deans of a college/university to complain (about roommates, classes, teachers, etc.)

so have i. and people wonder why kids move across the country!

Re: Lawnmower Parents: Do You Know Any?

Mominohio — Wed, 22 Oct 2014 13:24:52 GMT

dooBdoo, I think you are on to something there. Information overload is critical here (and with many other circumstances these days). We are constantly bombarded with all the latest information/studies/ trends etc.

When you are a new parent or the parent of an only, you only have the one experience, and one shot to "get it right". I think this drives some parents to go too far. I will say, that at least these kids have someone who loves them, wants to protect them, wants them to succeed and be happy, they just go overboard with it. The world is full of kids who grow/grew up with no one to take an interest in what they did or if they made it. So while neither extreme is good for the kids, I guess those kids stuck with the lawnmower parents don't have it all that bad, and will just have to push for their independence like those with no parental involvement had to push to succeed without any support.

Re: Lawnmower Parents: Do You Know Any?

Luv2Decorate — Wed, 22 Oct 2014 13:29:02 GMT

I don't know what to make of the so called "lawnmower parents".

A parent wanting their child to be in the same school as the child's friends, we don't know if that child was bullied or any of the circumstances.

We don't know if the parent's called the Dean of a University because the professor wasn't actually teaching in a class that the parents Paid for.

Re: Lawnmower Parents: Do You Know Any?

missy1 — Wed, 22 Oct 2014 13:35:18 GMT

On 10/21/2014 JustJazzmom said:
Our elementary school out of 6 in our area routinely splits the people graduating in 5th grade to attend 2 different middle schools. With that in mind, one parent insisted that her daughter be with the same kids she was in 5th grade for the 6th grade classes!! Never mind that changing schools and having to make new friends is part of growing up and having new experiences!!

The mother made such a stink about it, that the middle school caved and her daughter had classes with friends that she had made in the elementary school from her neighborhood. That was ridiculous!

I don't have a problem with this. Maybe the daughter had special needs.

Re: Lawnmower Parents: Do You Know Any?

focksie — Wed, 22 Oct 2014 13:42:01 GMT

Yes I do. She is a good person and has always wanted the best for her 3 children but has been too doting and too smothering in the process. Now her youngest is moving across the country. I don't even know the details as mom "doesn't want to talk about it". I feel terrible for her but you have to give your kids more freedom as they grow, allow them to make mistakes, and give them your confidence that they can be trusted and responsible.

Re: Lawnmower Parents: Do You Know Any?

JuJu Squeezie — Wed, 22 Oct 2014 14:08:56 GMT

I worry about the children with no parents, harmful parents, ill parents, criminal parents etc.

Caring too much parents? I don't have time to worry about them today. They'll work it out during the pre-teen years, good luck to them all.