topic Re: How do you Address an Invitation... in Community Chat

How do you Address an Invitation...

sunala — Thu, 18 Sep 2014 23:06:59 GMT

How do I address an invitation to a good friend and her fiance? They are not living together and I'm sending the invitation to her address with her name.

Should I add him as a guest, like Mrs. Mary Smith and Guest? Or should I name him on the invitation? There is no inner envelope, it's a Sweet 16, not a wedding.

I'm not Emily Post and sometimes I don't know the correct etiquette, but I don't want to step on any toes. Thanks!

Sunny

Re: How do you Address an Invitation...

I am still oxox — Thu, 18 Sep 2014 23:08:00 GMT

Why not just put Ms xyz and Mr lmno

Re: How do you Address an Invitation...

sunala — Thu, 18 Sep 2014 23:13:10 GMT

On 9/18/2014 I am still oxox said:
Why not just put Ms xyz and Mr lmno

I don't know; maybe because he doesn't live at her address? I'm not sure lol

They've been together a few years and are engaged.

It just looked wrong somehow, as does "and Guest."

Thanks I am still oxox!

Re: How do you Address an Invitation...

sylviahomeatlast — Thu, 18 Sep 2014 23:14:54 GMT

On 9/18/2014 I am still oxox said:
Why not just put Ms xyz and Mr lmno

I think this is the way I would do it.

Re: How do you Address an Invitation...

Clover29 — Thu, 18 Sep 2014 23:15:59 GMT

I'd write "& Guest", for the sake of formality in writing, but then I'd hand it to her rather than mail it, if she's a good friend. And I'd say, "Here's an invitation for you and [his name], I do hope you can come, we're all looking forward to it".

Re: How do you Address an Invitation...

foundinlv — Thu, 18 Sep 2014 23:16:07 GMT

I think you should address it to both even though you don't know if they're living together. They're a couple and if everyone knows that then I think it's the right thing to do.

Re: How do you Address an Invitation...

Suziepeach — Thu, 18 Sep 2014 23:20:48 GMT

Ms. Smith Smith and Mr. John Jones...

Re: How do you Address an Invitation...

focksie — Thu, 18 Sep 2014 23:21:15 GMT

It's her fiance so they are an established couple. Address it to both names. It shows that you acknowledge the seriousness of their relationship. I remember when I had been seeing my man for several years, everyone knew it, and I was incensed when I would receive invitations saying "Ms. focksie and Guest".

Re: How do you Address an Invitation...

sunala — Thu, 18 Sep 2014 23:23:18 GMT

I just changed it to add his name.

Thanks everyone!!!

Re: How do you Address an Invitation...

sunshine45 — Fri, 19 Sep 2014 00:46:19 GMT

Ms Mary Smith

Mr John Johns

that is how i would address it if you know his name, if not, then Ms Mary Smith and Guest is fine.

Re: How do you Address an Invitation...

NoelSeven — Fri, 19 Sep 2014 00:49:38 GMT

On 9/18/2014 sylviahomeatlast said:
On 9/18/2014 I am still oxox said:
Why not just put Ms xyz and Mr lmno

I think this is the way I would do it.

Me, too.

Re: How do you Address an Invitation...

sidsmom — Fri, 19 Sep 2014 01:12:20 GMT

It's ""and Guest"". Anything else & you're telling who she is obligated to bring.

Re: How do you Address an Invitation...

NoelSeven — Fri, 19 Sep 2014 01:23:21 GMT

On 9/18/2014 sidsmom said:
It's ""and Guest"". Anything else & you're telling who she is obligated to bring.

They're engaged. Referring to her plus one as Guest would be demeaning. As if he was not worthy of naming.

Re: How do you Address an Invitation...

sidsmom — Fri, 19 Sep 2014 01:39:49 GMT

Crane & Co recommends this. Since they're not living together, her fiancé is an escort/guest.

Re: How do you Address an Invitation...

WenGirl42 — Fri, 19 Sep 2014 01:39:55 GMT

If etiquette is your concern, then the proper form is either to invite her with "and guest" (assuming she will bring him) or to send each of them a separate invitation at their home address. If you want to be less formal, then you can name him too. Along these informal lines, you can always just address the invitation to her (for mailing purposes) and then hand-write inside that you hope she and (his name) can make it.

Re: How do you Address an Invitation...

ROMARY — Fri, 19 Sep 2014 02:18:04 GMT

I would use both names, and on the envelope use c/o her address.

Re: How do you Address an Invitation...

sunala — Fri, 19 Sep 2014 02:20:52 GMT

Thank you everybody!

I always know where to go when I need a question answered

Re: How do you Address an Invitation...

Lipstickdiva — Fri, 19 Sep 2014 16:11:08 GMT

On 9/18/2014 focksie said:
It's her fiance so they are an established couple. Address it to both names. It shows that you acknowledge the seriousness of their relationship. I remember when I had been seeing my man for several years, everyone knew it, and I was incensed when I would receive invitations saying "Ms. focksie and Guest".

Yes but they were being proper.

When I got married, I had to find out how to address invites because several of my friends had been in long term relationships but weren't living together, not engaged either. Etiquette dictated I address the invite to my friend and put "and Guest."

We did have the girlfriend of a friend refuse to come because of the way the invite was addressed.

Re: How do you Address an Invitation...

focksie — Fri, 19 Sep 2014 16:32:42 GMT

On 9/19/2014 LipstickDiva said:
On 9/18/2014 focksie said:
It's her fiance so they are an established couple. Address it to both names. It shows that you acknowledge the seriousness of their relationship. I remember when I had been seeing my man for several years, everyone knew it, and I was incensed when I would receive invitations saying "Ms. focksie and Guest".

Yes but they were being proper.

When I got married, I had to find out how to address invites because several of my friends had been in long term relationships but weren't living together, not engaged either. Etiquette dictated I address the invite to my friend and put "and Guest."

We did have the girlfriend of a friend refuse to come because of the way the invite was addressed.

I don't think close family and close friends need follow "etiquette" for the purpose of being proper. I think they should go by their feelings and how they think the recipient would feel if their loved one was not acknowledged. It was very hurtful to me.