topic Re: It's so weird to realize that there are things being talked about that we won't be around to see. in Community Chat

It's so weird to realize that there are things being talked about that we won't be around to see.

LilacTree — Tue, 09 Sep 2014 16:36:01 GMT

Every day, there are issues on TV, "ten years from now," or in one's personal life, "when (granddaughter) gets to college . . ." I am reminded of it every day now in so many ways. It's always been that way, talking about the near future, but it never meant much when one still had decades to go and we automatically assumed we would be there.

Oh, I realize anyone can die at any time . . . but for the most part, when it becomes a single digit thing for sure, almost anything that's said can bring it to mind. I find I can accept it, but never knew how much I would be reminded of it every single day just in ordinary conversation. I don't look for it, it's just always there.

Do others "up there" where I am find this to be so? If so, how do you reconcile it? I'm really interested in your thoughts.

Re: It's so weird to realize that there are things being talked about that we won't be around to see.

VioletEyes — Tue, 09 Sep 2014 16:57:45 GMT

After I reached fifty I decided to just live my life day by day and stop worrying about or thinking about years from now. I have had a good life and if it was to end today, I lived it to the fullest and have few regrets.

I always laugh when the show hosts sell jewelry and talk about it lasting a lifetime. By the time I reached fifty most of my jewelry that I had bought in real gold was terribly outdated as I suspect the stuff sold today will be in twenty years from now. The here and now is what counts and making each and every day a special one is now my goal whereas years ago I was always planning something or another, never really appreciating the here and now.

I try now not to dwell on the past, worry about the future and live for today and try and smell the roses.

Re: It's so weird to realize that there are things being talked about that we won't be around to see.

qvcaddition — Tue, 09 Sep 2014 16:59:53 GMT

Thank you for that. Needed that this morning at 78'

Re: It's so weird to realize that there are things being talked about that we won't be around to see.

minkbunny — Tue, 09 Sep 2014 17:02:13 GMT

At 65, I feel relatively young. Planning on another 40 years or so.

But, should my plans not pan out, I am prepared for my next life.

Re: It's so weird to realize that there are things being talked about that we won't be around to see.

LilacTree — Tue, 09 Sep 2014 17:09:47 GMT

I didn't notice any of this when I was fifty, softraindrops. This just started recently when daughter #3 and I began to talk about her girls (my youngest granddaughters) at 11 and 14, already starting to plan what they are going to be, what educations and professions they are interested in . . . and I'm sitting here at 76, realizing that's ten years away and the likelihood of my witnessing that is dubious, at best.

And as you said, I do try to live day to day. I guess it really started when I lost my beloved sister three years ago to the ravages of smoking. She was one year younger than me. And it hits me every day that she's gone.

I do try. I'm happy to hear from folks who are truly able to do this.

Re: It's so weird to realize that there are things being talked about that we won't be around to see.

LilacTree — Tue, 09 Sep 2014 17:11:03 GMT

On 9/9/2014 qvcaddition said: Thank you for that. Needed that this morning at 78'

I'm sorry, qvcaddition. Too heavy I guess for this BB. I apologize.

Re: It's so weird to realize that there are things being talked about that we won't be around to see.

RainyDayGal — Tue, 09 Sep 2014 17:13:58 GMT

I think about this kind of stuff sometimes. It really started bothering me when I could say, "Remember about 20 years ago....." Twenty years! OMG that made me feel so old right there.

Re: It's so weird to realize that there are things being talked about that we won't be around to see.

VioletEyes — Tue, 09 Sep 2014 17:16:52 GMT

On 9/9/2014 Ford1224 said:
I didn't notice any of this when I was fifty, softraindrops. This just started recently when daughter #3 and I began to talk about her girls (my youngest granddaughters) at 11 and 14, already starting to plan what they are going to be, what educations and professions they are interested in . . . and I'm sitting here at 76, realizing that's ten years away and the likelihood of my witnessing that is dubious, at best.

And as you said, I do try to live day to day. I guess it really started when I lost my beloved sister three years ago to the ravages of smoking. She was one year younger than me. And it hits me every day that she's gone.

I do try. I'm happy to hear from folks who are truly able to do this.

Don't let me mislead you, Ford. I have had many tragedies in my lifetime and realized a very long time ago that this is the life I was given and I try and make the best of it. I, too, have lost people in my life where not a day goes by that I don't think of them. I think the longer we live the more loss most of us have. The only thing that gets me through it is to try and concentrate on today. Someone once told me, a very close friend, just before she died from cancer that she wished she had enjoyed the here and now more without the constant need to think about the future. Maybe that is what impacted my decision to let go of a lot of hurting and live in the here and now.

Thanks for the topic. May I extend my condolences on the loss of your beloved sister.

Re: It's so weird to realize that there are things being talked about that we won't be around to see.

LilacTree — Tue, 09 Sep 2014 17:21:25 GMT

On 9/9/2014 RedConvertibleGirl said:
I think about this kind of stuff sometimes. It really started bothering me when I could say, "Remember about 20 years ago....." Twenty years! OMG that made me feel so old right there.

I graduated high school in 1956. Someone on this BB recently remarked that who could know what a 1950s TV mom looked like, as that was over 60 years ago. Well I was starting my teens in the early fifties, and I sure do remember. And it made me feel so very, very old.

I'll get over it. Maybe it's a combination of recent events plus things in my own life. It will pass.

Re: It's so weird to realize that there are things being talked about that we won't be around to see.

this is my nic — Tue, 09 Sep 2014 17:35:46 GMT

Since we never know when we'll leave this world, I don't focus on what may happen in the future. However, when movies from the 1980's are called classics, I think, really? Weren't the '80's just a few years ago? LOL!!

Re: It's so weird to realize that there are things being talked about that we won't be around to see.

redtabby — Tue, 09 Sep 2014 17:36:25 GMT

I do think about this stuff, too. Most likely, I will not see my great nieces and nephews get married, have children. I even wonder if I will be around to read all books in a series, or if I will see William coronated (and I am not a royalty buff). It may seem trivial to some people, for me, my own mortality is closer than I like.

Re: It's so weird to realize that there are things being talked about that we won't be around to see.

qualitygal — Tue, 09 Sep 2014 17:41:28 GMT

Oh boy howdie!! Yep, this last year has been harder than most. My father is near passing they tell me and I'm kind of jumping every time the phone rings. While he's been at the NH, I've really felt it more everyday. When his generation (him in my book) is no more, we're next up on the docket. Movies I see can be 0-50 yrs old. I know we say, where did that time go? I'm not afraid of passing when the time comes. I just think in the scheme of things, the next 20 possible will go fast. I can look back, 10, 20, 30, 40, 50, & 60 yrs now. Holy smokes time flies. So yes I can relate.

Re: It's so weird to realize that there are things being talked about that we won't be around to see.

BellaPaprika — Tue, 09 Sep 2014 17:46:04 GMT

I'm not "up there" in age yet but when and if I am my attitude will be no different than it's always been. I've never been one to make long range plans as the vagaries of life have taught me the folly of that. I go where the spirits lead me at the time and I wake up every day thinking "great, I get another day".

Re: It's so weird to realize that there are things being talked about that we won't be around to see.

RainyDayGal — Tue, 09 Sep 2014 17:47:34 GMT

What bothers me most is not having enough time to finish things. I'm only 56, but it's been challenging lately so I wonder if things will get accomplished.

Re: It's so weird to realize that there are things being talked about that we won't be around to see.

Free2be — Tue, 09 Sep 2014 17:58:12 GMT

I'm 68 and don't think about life going on without me so much as I think like RedConvertibleGirl -- that I'm running out of time to get some things done.

I also often think on the great strides that will occur without me, more societal than individual. I often wish my sis was here, she died in 1959, just beginning to enjoy her adulthood -- I wish I could show her so much that she has missed. Then I think what future things would my grandchildren wish they could show me.

Similarly, I wonder what would Bach think if he could hear The Beatles.

In the meantime, we should relish every day and give no mind to what doesn't matter.

Re: It's so weird to realize that there are things being talked about that we won't be around to see.

LilacTree — Tue, 09 Sep 2014 18:01:06 GMT

On 9/9/2014 redtabby said:
I do think about this stuff, too. Most likely, I will not see my great nieces and nephews get married, have children. I even wonder if I will be around to read all books in a series, or if I will see William coronated (and I am not a royalty buff). It may seem trivial to some people, for me, my own mortality is closer than I like.

Odd you should bring up the royal babies, because that was part of it for me yesterday when they started talking about "the next in line to the throne" and all of that. It's odd things like that which are brought up every day that make me realize these are things that I will never see.

And Joan Rivers too. That was huge to me because I thought that lady was going to live to be 100!!

When I wake up in the morning, I don't think "another great day!" I think "I'm still here?"

Re: It's so weird to realize that there are things being talked about that we won't be around to see.

tansy — Tue, 09 Sep 2014 18:05:17 GMT

When I was younger, I thought if I could hit 82 with my mind reasonably intact that would be a good long life. Now at 62 that's only 20 years away and I do think about it some days. The next car we buy will be our last, no more kittens, that kind of thing.

Re: It's so weird to realize that there are things being talked about that we won't be around to see.

LilacTree — Tue, 09 Sep 2014 18:09:13 GMT

On 9/9/2014 SoftRaindrops said:
On 9/9/2014 Ford1224 said:
I didn't notice any of this when I was fifty, softraindrops. This just started recently when daughter #3 and I began to talk about her girls (my youngest granddaughters) at 11 and 14, already starting to plan what they are going to be, what educations and professions they are interested in . . . and I'm sitting here at 76, realizing that's ten years away and the likelihood of my witnessing that is dubious, at best.

And as you said, I do try to live day to day. I guess it really started when I lost my beloved sister three years ago to the ravages of smoking. She was one year younger than me. And it hits me every day that she's gone.

I do try. I'm happy to hear from folks who are truly able to do this.

Don't let me mislead you, Ford. I have had many tragedies in my lifetime and realized a very long time ago that this is the life I was given and I try and make the best of it. I, too, have lost people in my life where not a day goes by that I don't think of them. I think the longer we live the more loss most of us have. The only thing that gets me through it is to try and concentrate on today. Someone once told me, a very close friend, just before she died from cancer that she wished she had enjoyed the here and now more without the constant need to think about the future. Maybe that is what impacted my decision to let go of a lot of hurting and live in the here and now.

Thanks for the topic. May I extend my condolences on the loss of your beloved sister.

Thank you, softraindrops. And thank you for not berating the topic. I think most folks over 60 start thinking about their mortality, but some (or most?) are better at "seizing the day" than others. I am usually okay . . . this is only lately.

Re: It's so weird to realize that there are things being talked about that we won't be around to see.

minkbunny — Tue, 09 Sep 2014 18:16:15 GMT

I think your feelings are perfectly normal and valid, Ford. There is a lot of melancholy in the country right now so our mortality naturally could surface in our through process.

Wishing you well (and I am going to bet the farm - and I love the farm - that you will see that granddaughter become a nurse).

Re: It's so weird to realize that there are things being talked about that we won't be around to see.

LilacTree — Tue, 09 Sep 2014 18:17:23 GMT

On 9/9/2014 tansy said: When I was younger, I thought if I could hit 82 with my mind reasonably intact that would be a good long life. Now at 62 that's only 20 years away and I do think about it some days. The next car we buy will be our last, no more kittens, that kind of thing.

Exactly, Tansy, you hit the nail on the head. "This will probably be my last [fill in the blank]." They advertise something on TV, and I think "I'll never need that again." And, sadly, yes, no more pets. Probably no more babies to hold and love. And what kind of future will my kids and grandkids have in this troubled world . . . all of that.

Fortunately, I know this will pass. I'm probably in a temporary depression. I've had them before and I've always come out of them.