topic Re: Need advice re gossipy mail carrier in Community Chat

Need advice re gossipy mail carrier

momma3gs — Tue, 22 Jul 2014 19:48:51 GMT

I'd appreciate opinions on this. I live between two states and have mail stopped when I leave. This last time I was gone only a few days when my next door neighbor called my cell to say I received an envelope from the Eastern District Court of this state. Our carrier didn't "want it sitting around in the hold mail box" for a couple more weeks in case it was important, so she delivered it to my neighbor who called me.

I should preface this by stating my neighbor is a self-admitted busybody and gossip, in her late 60s. The mail carrier is a woman in her mid-40s, I would estimate. Somehow they've developed a friendship and it's not unusual for them to converse at the neighbor's house for 40 minutes or longer each day when she delivers mail. I am the next house on her route ... I'm trying to set the scenario.

I realize there are probably no time constraints on residential mail delivery so that's not the issue, but I was taken aback to receive such a phone call and outraged that something that could have been sensitive correspondence was delivered to someone other than me. It was clear my neighbor expected me to say "open it and read it to me". I'm not embroiled in litigation so wasn't concerned and wouldn't give her the satisfaction. I asked her to please ask the carrier not to concern herself with my mail and from whom it is sent ... just hold it as requested. I had to leave a phone number with the hold request, so why didn't she just call me if she was concerned? I don't even think she should be telling anyone when I'm due back.

I would love it if her route could be changed, but I'd have to tell the postmaster what's going on and I don't want her job jeopardized. My husband says she probably meant well and to forget it, but I'm really livid about it. I have neighbors on this street with whom I'm friendly (who take care of my plants, etc.), but I keep the nosy neighbor at arm's length. Would this upset you? BTW, the letter in question was a juror qualification questionnaire.

Sorry for the length and rambling nature of this post.

Re: Need advice re gossipy mail carrier

Free2be — Tue, 22 Jul 2014 20:01:18 GMT

Someone at the post office should have called you if they concern themselves with court notifications which usually have some kind of "respond by" date.

Never should it have been delivered to anyone other than yourself. You'll have to live with whatever you decide to do. She probably didn't mean to stir anything up but you never know what about you they've previously gossiped or will continue. You can't control that but you might control whether she is reprimanded or ?? One other thought, if you call her supervisor, be sure to include her lengthy visits which is part of your concern about your privacy in regards to what mail you receive.

Re: Need advice re gossipy mail carrier

chrystaltree — Tue, 22 Jul 2014 20:01:58 GMT

Make a formal complaint to your post office or just let it go. You can't have it both ways.

Re: Need advice re gossipy mail carrier

kdgn — Tue, 22 Jul 2014 20:02:41 GMT

The mail carrier had absolutely no business giving any of your mail to a neighbor, not when there is a hold on your mail. She shouldn't be delivering it anywhere but to you under any circumstances.

I realize you don't wish to put the woman's job in jeopardy but this incident does need to be reported.

I'm not even sure if what she did was legal. And why did she have your mail with her? I thought mail on hold stayed at the post office until you picked it up-

Re: Need advice re gossipy mail carrier

JustJules — Tue, 22 Jul 2014 20:05:04 GMT

I would report it to your local post office. Your mail carrier was out of line, not her decision to determine how important your mail is, and if you put a hold on it while you are away, that is where it should go. It is unlawful for anyone to tamper with your mail, and it certainly is not okay for your mail carrier to deliver your mail to anyone else unless you gave them instructions to do so. Not okay.

Re: Need advice re gossipy mail carrier

SydneyH — Tue, 22 Jul 2014 20:06:21 GMT

It's against the law for a carrier to purposely deliver mail to a different address, this should be reported immediately to the Post Master.

Re: Need advice re gossipy mail carrier

focksie — Tue, 22 Jul 2014 20:07:18 GMT

Yes it would upset me very much. I would have a friendly, but serious conversation with your mail carrier about your expectations. If what she did wasn't illegal, I'm sure it was against "company policy" so to speak.

I only suggest talking to her first 'cause she is in control of your mail in the future after all.

Re: Need advice re gossipy mail carrier

Mama Mia — Tue, 22 Jul 2014 20:09:03 GMT

I would go in and talk with the postmaster about this. She certainly had no right to leave your mail with the neighbor when you have a hold on it. Anytime, actually, unless you designate it.

Re: Need advice re gossipy mail carrier

spud188 — Tue, 22 Jul 2014 20:09:38 GMT

Report it,I would be very upset too. I asked our Postmistress and she said what the carrier did was wrong.

Re: Need advice re gossipy mail carrier

Oneanddone — Tue, 22 Jul 2014 20:11:50 GMT

If you put a hold status on your mail through the post office, that is how it should remain.

Held at the post office until YOU lift the hold.

That's how it works.

Obviously they didn't do that.

Report it.

Re: Need advice re gossipy mail carrier

occasionalrain — Tue, 22 Jul 2014 20:14:51 GMT

If this mail was so important that you needed notified it would have been sent registered with your signature required. The postal worker should have know this and left the neighbor out of it.

If you report her, which she deserves, you need to be prepared for your neighbor to be angry with you. Do you care about that?

Whether the postal woman loses her job should not be your concern. If she does, it's her fault not yours.

If it were me, I would definitely file a complaint.

Re: Need advice re gossipy mail carrier

brii — Tue, 22 Jul 2014 20:17:37 GMT

I would definitely make a complaint about something like that.

Re: Need advice re gossipy mail carrier

------ — Tue, 22 Jul 2014 20:26:02 GMT

Your mail carrier's duty is to deliver mail to the right household/person not to make decisions on what is urgent and important and what isn't.

I would complain.

And if it were me I would then tell the mail carrier to her face that you aren't friends with that neighbor and never give your mail to her again.

Re: Need advice re gossipy mail carrier

happycat — Tue, 22 Jul 2014 20:37:26 GMT

I would not be happy. As some of the other posters have said, this does need to be reported to the post master. Also, you say it is unusual for the two ladies to talk 40 minutes while the one is supposed to be delivering mail- not sure that is right either. The mail lady has a job. It is not feed a friendship.

Re: Need advice re gossipy mail carrier

esmerelda — Tue, 22 Jul 2014 20:38:40 GMT

Since you left a hold order at the post office, without going into too many details (just that all of your mail was not held as instructed), I'd inquire...at the post office--I wouldn't even bring it up with the mail carrier... about why that order was ignored. If she brings it up later, I'd tell her I took care of it and wouldn't discuss it.

One piece of mail? Doesn't matter. It was to hold ALL mail.

Re: Need advice re gossipy mail carrier

SydneyH — Tue, 22 Jul 2014 20:39:14 GMT

In the past, all routes, residential or rural are supposed to be completed in a timely fashion. Taking a 40 minute chat break is unacceptable.

Re: Need advice re gossipy mail carrier

SusyQ22a — Tue, 22 Jul 2014 20:42:18 GMT

This mail carrier knows where she lives. If her job is in jeopardy and she loses it then she could want retribution and get back at her. Momma3gs said she doesn't want to put the carrier's job in jeopardy. I would have just communicate what you posted here about the hold and delivering the mail deliberately to a neighbor and if it happens again you will report her. Sounds like the carrier was looking for some gossip to share. She was hoping your neighbor would see the importance of the letter and call you and she would get some juicy gossip. Good for you for not feeding into that.

Re: Need advice re gossipy mail carrier

nunya — Tue, 22 Jul 2014 20:45:06 GMT

oh yeah, I'd be calling.

It's not the mail lady's business to tell or give your neighbor anything.

Re: Need advice re gossipy mail carrier

------ — Tue, 22 Jul 2014 20:47:31 GMT

On 7/22/2014 SusyQ22a said: This mail carrier knows where she lives. If her job is in jeopardy and she loses it then she could want retribution and get back at her. Momma3gs said she doesn't want to put the carrier's job in jeopardy. I would have just communicate what you posted here about the hold and delivering the mail deliberately to a neighbor and if it happens again you will report her. Sounds like the carrier was looking for some gossip to share. She was hoping your neighbor would see the importance of the letter and call you and she would get some juicy gossip. Good for you for not feeding into that.

I heard mail carriers getting fired is rare and getting one fired is a tedious, almost impossible mission to accomplish (unionized). I wouldn't worry about the complaint getting back to the woman.

Re: Need advice re gossipy mail carrier

KathyPet — Tue, 22 Jul 2014 20:52:32 GMT

I agree that a formal complaint needs to be made. Mail is not to be delivered to anyone but the recipient. It is not your problem what happens after that. This was a clear violation of PO rules