topic Re: Sibling Greed in Community Chat

Sibling Greed

Mistreatedbycs — Wed, 07 May 2014 21:43:12 GMT

Mom isn't even gone and already my siblings are expressing their greed.

unreal.

Re: Sibling Greed

Monketoes — Wed, 07 May 2014 21:45:26 GMT

That is so sad...I'm sorry you are dealing with this

Re: Sibling Greed

straykatz — Wed, 07 May 2014 21:48:23 GMT

I'm so sorry this is happening in your family....this may not be much comfort for you but please know this happens to a lot of families.

Re: Sibling Greed

LyndaGee — Wed, 07 May 2014 21:52:38 GMT

Hope your Mom isn't aware of this, because that would probably hurt her terribly.

One of my neighbors has told me her brother has said: "When Mom goes, I'm selling the house." HE doesn't even know what's in the Will, and he acts like he's taking over. Terrible.

Re: Sibling Greed

deepwaterdotter — Wed, 07 May 2014 21:54:15 GMT

I am so glad that my father has recorded an itemized list of his assets and belongings in his will. But I also hope that if this list didn't exist that my siblings and I would not fight over his estate.

Re: Sibling Greed

Lipstickdiva — Wed, 07 May 2014 21:54:24 GMT

On 5/7/2014 straykatz said:
I'm so sorry this is happening in your family....this may not be much comfort for you but please know this happens to a lot of families.

Yes it does. I deal with it on a regular basis. It's crazy what people fight over.

Re: Sibling Greed

straykatz — Wed, 07 May 2014 21:56:19 GMT

On 5/7/2014 LyndaGee said:
Hope your Mom isn't aware of this, because that would probably hurt her terribly.

One of my neighbors has told me her brother has said: "When Mom goes, I'm selling he house." HE doesn't even know what's in the Will, and he acts like he's taking over! Awful.

It bothers me that every time we visit my DH's family his sister starts talking about their father's assets.....as far as we know everything is being split 50/50 between them so I don't know what purpose it serves for her to always want to talk will/assets.

Re: Sibling Greed

LyndaGee — Wed, 07 May 2014 22:02:59 GMT

I don't blame you for being concerned, Straykatz.

Re: Sibling Greed

luvdoodles — Wed, 07 May 2014 22:07:56 GMT

I hope she has a will, if not have her get one soon. These stories make me sad. I have three brothers and we all get along fine and my mother has a will. Everything will be divided among us equally. I do hope I get her beautiful china though since I am her only daughter.

Re: Sibling Greed

151949 — Wed, 07 May 2014 22:11:36 GMT

I was extremely fortunate in the sibling category - after my Mom died I inherited all her jewelry because i am the only girl - she had inherited all my Grandmother's jewelry and my grandpap was a jeweler so it was quite a haul. I chose to share with my SILs and we had a nice afternoon sitting around a table picking pieces from a huge pile I had placed on the table. My brothers never questioned me about anything from our inheritance - they were supportive and kind to me the entire time my Dad was ill and after he died. One SIL was a bit of a problem but my brother quickly informed her that the boys trusted me and it was really not her business. They were truly a blessing to me at that time.

Re: Sibling Greed

Luv2Decorate — Wed, 07 May 2014 22:12:04 GMT

Unbeknownst to my siblings, my mother has everything set and in writing. I am the executor of her estate and I told her I can handle any fallout. Many of my friends parents have passed away and the arguments that occurred are unreal and rather disappointing.

Re: Sibling Greed

Mama Mia — Wed, 07 May 2014 22:12:49 GMT

On 5/7/2014 luvpoos said:
I hope she has a will, if not have her get one soon. These stories make me sad. I have three brothers and we all get along fine and my mother has a will. Everything will be divided among us equally. I do hope I get her beautiful china though since I am her only daughter.

You better have your Mom write that one out for you. Things change a lot when someone passes, you never know who can get greedy, or one of those DIL's may say they want it. You say "I do hope" so that kind of says it's not set in stone. I agree, you should get it though.

Re: Sibling Greed

pistolino — Wed, 07 May 2014 22:21:29 GMT

I'm sorry.

Mine wasn't even gone a couple of days and my brother called to ask if he could have the leftover money in her nursing home trust fund....it was less than $100 for Pete's sake.

Re: Sibling Greed

Mistreatedbycs — Wed, 07 May 2014 22:53:14 GMT

A will means nothing, it's just that persons' wishes.

My mom had some transfer of death deeds in place and they want them changed.

I'm the POA but mom can sign herself. It's really a mess and I called the courthouse and understand as long as it has her signature on it, it can be changed and they don't need me at all to do this.

I figure after my mom is really gone, I won't have a family at all.

I just talked to a customer that came in and she said something similar happened 3 years ago with her dad and she has lost her family too.

Re: Sibling Greed

terrier3 — Wed, 07 May 2014 23:06:14 GMT

When my mom died, she was flat broke. My aunt & I had supported her for years.

When she was in the hospital with her final illness, my sister flew in from out of town - hadn't seen mom in 6 years - STOLE her power of attorney and living will (my aunt was the person on the forms) and convinced our mother she wanted to die. The doctors and nurses said nothing could be done until my aunt had the papers (my mom was out of it with kidney failure).

By the time we found out what my sister had done, it was too late.

She thought she was going to get a lot of money. She was beyond furious when she found out there wasn't enough to fully pay for the cremation.

Consider yourself lucky you aren't related to my sister!

Re: Sibling Greed

deepwaterdotter — Wed, 07 May 2014 23:07:48 GMT

On 5/7/2014 nantucket shore said:
A will means nothing, it's just that persons' wishes.

My mom had some transfer of death deeds in place and they want them changed.

I'm the POA but mom can sign herself. It's really a mess and I called the courthouse and understand as long as it has her signature on it, it can be changed and they don't need me at all to do this.

I figure after my mom is really gone, I won't have a family at all.

I just talked to a customer that came in and she said something similar happened 3 years ago with her dad and she has lost her family too.

Under what circumstances would a legally-binding, signed will drawn up and filed by an attorney not be upheld in a court of law?

Re: Sibling Greed

tansy — Wed, 07 May 2014 23:09:15 GMT

A will should be binding but it won't stop any fighting.

Re: Sibling Greed

glb613 — Wed, 07 May 2014 23:09:59 GMT

On 5/7/2014 nantucket shore said:
A will means nothing, it's just that persons' wishes.

My mom had some transfer of death deeds in place and they want them changed.

I'm the POA but mom can sign herself. It's really a mess and I called the courthouse and understand as long as it has her signature on it, it can be changed and they don't need me at all to do this.

I figure after my mom is really gone, I won't have a family at all.

I just talked to a customer that came in and she said something similar happened 3 years ago with her dad and she has lost her family too.

Where did you go to law school? A will is a legal document and means a lot!

Re: Sibling Greed

chickenbutt — Wed, 07 May 2014 23:16:25 GMT

I hear of this sooooo much! Even people who never imagined their siblings would be this way often see them turn into monsters.

I guess if one concern is for something in particular that you want, it's best to completely iron that out ahead of time. That said, however, geez! Who wants to talk about that kind of stuff with their parent? My father would start talking about that kind of stuff and, truth be told, and even though I understand the practicality, I just didn't want to hear it.

Re: Sibling Greed

terrier3 — Wed, 07 May 2014 23:27:25 GMT

It's terrible to witness how miserably some people react to losing a parent!