topic Re: Have you ever talk to someone on the phone & you can't tell if it's a male or female? in Community Chat

Have you ever talked to someone on the phone & you can't tell if it's a male or female?

San Antonio Gal — Wed, 04 Sep 2024 02:16:27 GMT

Not only can I not tell by the voice, but his/her name is also gender friendly!

I have to call this person back and I don't know to call this person Mr. Smith or Ms. Smith. I don't want to call this person by their first name because we're not on a first name basis yet.

Any suggestions?

Re: Have you ever talk to someone on the phone & you can't tell if it's a male or female?

Goldengate8361 — Wed, 04 Sep 2024 01:56:45 GMT

Just say it real fast! Haha

Re: Have you ever talk to someone on the phone & you can't tell if it's a male or female?

San Antonio Gal — Wed, 04 Sep 2024 01:59:52 GMT

@Goldengate8361 wrote:
Just say it real fast! Haha

@Goldengate8361 - Lol. I'll say it real fast or I'll mumble!!

Re: Have you ever talk to someone on the phone & you can't tell if it's a male or female?

NYCLatinaMe — Wed, 04 Sep 2024 06:03:36 GMT

Hi @San Antonio Gal I had a similar experience with a person I had to meet in a business setting. I finally asked privately, someone else, after the meeting, and the person is non-binary. I couldn't even tell during the meeting with them and other people how to address them. First names were good for the meeting. I thought the person might be transgender, but I hadn't thought about non-binary.

If you are returning a call, I would just say the first and last name if that is what they gave you.

Non-binary people use they them pronouns. I have seen Mx. in writing but have never heard it pronounced. Maybe googling how to refer to them is an idea.

But I think I would just say Hi, I am calling [first name] [last name].

Re: Have you ever talk to someone on the phone & you can't tell if it's a male or female?

bikerbabe — Wed, 04 Sep 2024 02:09:21 GMT

I rarely use titles. I actually don’t like them.

Ask for “first name last name”.

Re: Have you ever talk to someone on the phone & you can't tell if it's a male or female?

Lucky Charm — Wed, 04 Sep 2024 02:11:37 GMT

@San Antonio Gal wrote:
Not only can I not tell by the voice, but his/her name is also gender friendly!

I have to call this person back and I don't know to call this person Mr. Smith or Ms. Smith. I don't want to call this person by their first name because we're not on a first name basis yet.

Any suggestions?

I would call and say 'Hi, I'd like to speak to Terry So and So'.

When they say you're speaking to them, I would just say what I'm calling about....or 'I'm returning your call'....

Re: Have you ever talk to someone on the phone & you can't tell if it's a male or female?

San Antonio Gal — Wed, 04 Sep 2024 02:10:46 GMT

Good point @NYCLatinaMe . I think I'll call this person and say "Hello Terry Smith. How are you doing today?" and take it from there.

This person just has a voice that can go either way.

Re: Have you ever talk to someone on the phone & you can't tell if it's a male or female?

beach-mom — Wed, 04 Sep 2024 02:10:56 GMT

@San Antonio Gal - I would do what @NYCLatinaMe recommended - use both first and last name, e.g. "Jessie Smith? This is San Antonio Gal. I'm returning your call about. . ."

Re: Have you ever talk to someone on the phone & you can't tell if it's a male or female?

San Antonio Gal — Wed, 04 Sep 2024 02:15:32 GMT

@beach-mom wrote:
@San Antonio Gal - I would do what @NYCLatinaMe recommended - use both first and last name, e.g. "Jessie Smith? This is San Antonio Gal. I'm returning your call about. . ."

Thanks @beach-mom @Lucky Charm and @bikerbabe . Maybe by the end of the call, we'll be on a first name basis.

Re: Have you ever talked to someone on the phone & you can't tell if it's a male or female?

CalminHeart — Wed, 04 Sep 2024 11:26:44 GMT

Don't say Mr. or Mrs. Use their first and last name. There are dozens of ways to talk to them without using Mr. or Mrs. Their gender should not be an issue.

Re: Have you ever talk to someone on the phone & you can't tell if it's a male or female?

Meowingkitty — Wed, 04 Sep 2024 12:30:33 GMT

@bikerbabe wrote:
I rarely use titles. I actually don’t like them.

Ask for “first name last name”.

I never use titles. In fact if someone calls and asks for Mrs Whatever I know darn good and well you don't know me because I've never referred to myself as Miss, Mrs or Ms. I use my first name and last.

Re: Have you ever talked to someone on the phone & you can't tell if it's a male or female?

haddon9 — Wed, 04 Sep 2024 13:19:02 GMT

It's Pat!!

Re: Have you ever talked to someone on the phone & you can't tell if it's a male or female?

cheriere — Wed, 04 Sep 2024 16:28:26 GMT

@haddon9 wrote:
It's Pat!!

lol, I'd forgotten about that character! Well played, Perfect analogy!😃😂❤️

Re: Have you ever talked to someone on the phone & you can't tell if it's a male or female?

lgfan — Wed, 04 Sep 2024 16:36:51 GMT

If I am not sure of the gender I always say John Smith or Lee Jones. I do not use Ms., Mrs. or Mr. in the greeting.

Re: Have you ever talked to someone on the phone & you can't tell if it's a male or female?

qvcfreak — Wed, 04 Sep 2024 16:46:58 GMT

Speaking of not recognizing voices.

When I was in the hospital last month, my husband called and I had my phone on silent so I missed the call.

I could see my sister on the phone for awhile and then she handed me the phone, I thought I was talking to her son in-law Phil and all along it was my husband. I was so out of it I didn't recognize his voice at all.

Re: Have you ever talked to someone on the phone & you can't tell if it's a male or female?

Citrine1 — Wed, 04 Sep 2024 22:38:11 GMT

I've had that happen too. You hava a lot of good suggestions here as to what you can do @San Antonio Gal .

Just a quick little story. A few years ago I had a part time job as a receptionist. A driver came in and asked where the bathroom was and I honestly didn't know whether this person was male or female. Inside I was really panicking! Finally, I just said the mens room is over there and the ladies room is right here.

I was so uncomfortable and didn't want to make this person uncomfortable (although they may have wondered why I pointed out both bathrooms). Person ended up using the ladies room.

Re: Have you ever talked to someone on the phone & you can't tell if it's a male or female?

San Antonio Gal — Wed, 04 Sep 2024 23:55:20 GMT

@Citrine1 - I say you handled that situation pretty well!

Re: Have you ever talked to someone on the phone & you can't tell if it's a male or female?

CatsOnMyLap — Fri, 06 Sep 2024 18:24:45 GMT

Nice job on being tactful!

Re: Have you ever talked to someone on the phone & you can't tell if it's a male or female?

willdob3 — Sat, 07 Sep 2024 00:24:36 GMT

@San Antonio Gal It happens to me when I'm calling customers at work. I don't know if I'm talking to the person or their spouse.

Do you have Whitepages?You could look them up and, if they have a spouse, that name might help.

Re: Have you ever talked to someone on the phone & you can't tell if it's a male or female?

katie1859 — Sat, 07 Sep 2024 01:15:09 GMT

Just say to whomever answers your call that you are responding and you would like to discuss whatever it was they called about. You will probably be out in connection with who handles that topic. Then introduce yourself and ask who you are talking with. Write the name down.