topic Re: Drama queens in Community Chat

Drama queens

smoochy — Sun, 11 Aug 2024 03:25:47 GMT

we all know one. Or maybe more than one. They pop up here, in our real lives, on social media like Facebook. I'll be honest- sometimes when I post something here about my medical problems or personal stuff,whatever, I think oh geez I hope no one thinks I'm exaggerating or just trying to get attention. But that's me-still worrying about how I come across to people. Been like this my entire life.
Back to my point and my question for you guys.
What is your approach to the drama queens in your world?
I personally know two-they are women I never see in person since we moved. So I read their Facebook posts; poor pitiful me, why is life so hard, I have to be everything to everyone, etc. Then they want advice but refuse to take it. So I have stopped engaging with them until they get over themselves and go back to acting normal for a while 😁

Re: Drama queens

Marp — Sun, 11 Aug 2024 04:16:00 GMT

When it comes to drama queens my first impulse is to try to figure out fact from fiction then respond or ignore accordingly.

In my experience there is generally much more fiction presented with just a smattering of fact mixed in.

For example, the drama queen says I was at a party and developed the most excruciating headache I've ever had. Couldn't wait for the party to be over. This would often be followed with a detailed description of all she tried all the suggestions offered to help but they were already tried unsuccessfully.

Translation, I was at a party and started to get a headache. If it was truly excruciating it is unlikely one would hang around for the party to end.

While I am usually very sympathetic and empathetic I can be very cynical when things don't add up.

Re: Drama queens

AuntMame — Sun, 11 Aug 2024 04:40:04 GMT

I'm fortunate that I haven't any drama queens in my life, unless one counts my mom. Otherwise, all my friends and relatives have been delightfully sane.

By the way the term "drama queen" comes from a theatrical term that arose in the late 19th, early 20th century. It referred to actresses who starred in that period's version of daily soap operas.

Middle-class women in big cities like NY and Boston would attend cheap daily theatrical performances with continuing story lines. Similar to modern TV soaps. There were favorite actresses, the Susan Luccis of the day, who starred in these soaps. They were called "drama queens" because they really were celebrities at the time, although the term was a bit derisive because they weren't doing Shakespeare.

Re: Drama queens

Kitlynn — Sun, 11 Aug 2024 04:45:41 GMT

Just reply to them "honestly you are unhappy about ___ so what are you going to do to change how that affects you?" Don't give advice or suggestions just put it on them to give you answer for them to get a positive result. If they don't have one then just say "maybe you need to just take a moment and figure out what you need to do." If it is in person then just change the subject if it is online then don't respond anymore after you ask them the question.

Re: Drama queens

cjm61 — Sun, 11 Aug 2024 05:32:03 GMT

@smoochy I don't do Facebook but can't you somehow not "follow" that person or be "friends" with them? Due to this type of scenario I don't like social media. This forum is the extent I go to for social media.

Anyway, if a person is bothering you enough to post here perhaps you should un-friend them, or whatever it's called. Give yourself a break.

Re: Drama queens

SurferWife — Sun, 11 Aug 2024 06:09:31 GMT

@smoochy

I do think that some, okay, many people over-share about their problems, whether it's here, FB or any other social media site. If/when I have adversity in my life, I don't tell anyone...mum is the word. I don't need that kind of attention. Everyone faces adversity in life, and quite frankly the ones who go on & on & on about their problems are simply energy drainers. You're last sentence says it all...stop engaging until they get over themselves.

Re: Drama queens

Rockycoast — Sun, 11 Aug 2024 06:23:51 GMT

Looking over my friends and family I can happily say none are drama queens. Probably because none of us would put up with the behavior. Sure everyone complains now and then, but the poor me, look at me attention getting behavior, nope.

Re: Drama queens

Tinkrbl44 — Sun, 11 Aug 2024 07:09:14 GMT

Drama queens can be amusing but, honestly, I avoid them.

For me, there's no upside to trying to tolerate them. They are just too annoying.

Re: Drama queens

Imaoldhippie — Sun, 11 Aug 2024 11:40:06 GMT

I stay away from the drama queens I know as much as possible.

Re: Drama queens

qualitygal — Sun, 11 Aug 2024 11:58:28 GMT

Sometimes, I wish I had a few in my life. I miss my female relatives. I'm in a group of some very nice ladies. So, not a lot of drama in my life.

Re: Drama queens

JYWilliams — Sun, 11 Aug 2024 12:00:22 GMT

I also try to stay away from Drama Queens. And I agree with @SurferWife that some people do over share about their problems. That's why I skip over certain names on these boards because it seems to be a daily thing and sometimes several posts within that day. And I do know that a person can post what they want to with in the guidelines so I'll just pass those posts by.

Re: Drama queens

DrakesMomma — Sun, 11 Aug 2024 12:01:14 GMT

It is attention seeking behaviors. I was around a lot of them growing up - some sisters and our mom. Did they learn it from her? I don't know, perhaps. As I have read more and learned more, I think in these cases there might be an underlying mental illness.

What I really know is I can't have these type of people in my life.

Re: Drama queens

Gorgf — Sun, 11 Aug 2024 12:06:22 GMT

I recall a teeshirt...."SAVE THE DRAMA FOR YOUR MOMMA."

Nope....I cover my ears and keep walking. I prefer my privacy, Thank you. Being retired I hear alot less. I rarely look at Facebook.

My cousin is still pictured with his wife? He passed away a year tragically breaking his neck in a fall a year and a half ago and she is in a nursing home with her Mother, no less in adjourned rooms.

It was her Birthday a couple of weeks ago and people at least 12 people were wishing her a Happy Birthday. I bet she hasn't been on Facebook with her dementia? Same drama posters there over and over.

Re: Drama queens

Roscoe the Rascal — Sun, 11 Aug 2024 12:28:20 GMT

I work with one and think how can your life be so much like you talk about. Always something wrong and on and on she goes. Any more I just don't feed into it and caught her in a lie or two. She also cry's very quickly when talking. She does not let anything go.

Personally, I do think she has some mental issues and had a rough childhood but I will listen some and then move on. I know I could not hang with her outside of work.

Re: Drama queens

CalminHeart — Sun, 11 Aug 2024 12:31:28 GMT

I don't like to be around drama queens/kings.

Everyone has drama at one time or another. If it's serious and real, I'm there for them to the end.

Don't ask me to be party to childish drama, drama just to be drama, and people who use drama to manipulate others.

I get to choose who I let into my life.

Re: Drama queens

Pearlee — Sun, 11 Aug 2024 12:35:57 GMT

There are several obvious drama queens here in the Q forums. I wonder if they even recognize themselves? Probably not.

Re: Drama queens

Sooner — Sun, 11 Aug 2024 12:37:24 GMT

I have lived with a flock of them all my life: my family and husbands family. You just have to say "whatever" and do your own thing.

I was raised by my dad the unflappable, competent, do my own thing and you worry about yours daddy. And I thank the Lord many times a day for his love, confidence and good sense. I live and let live, but once in awhile I am compelled to say "You need to leave."

Re: Drama queens

Sooner — Sun, 11 Aug 2024 12:41:26 GMT

I will say that here we have always had a few who post things, leave out details, then pick at the respondents to try to make them look stupid and themselves look smart. What is odd to me is people keep falling for it. They often get to be some of the most popular.

Then there are ones who like to drive all conversations and run the boards for awhile. That gets old too. It must go to their heads to be so powerful. Here. . .

Re: Drama queens

Junebug54 — Sun, 11 Aug 2024 13:14:29 GMT

@Sooner I agree Sooner. Two on the boards that immediately come to mind.

Re: Drama queens

deepwaterdotter — Sun, 11 Aug 2024 13:47:21 GMT

I simply don't respond. Since I have no training in psychiatric matters, I would be of no help to a person seeking attention due to faulty emotional health.