topic Re: what bothers you? in Community Chat

what bothers you?

GoneButNotForgotten — Sat, 28 Jan 2023 18:11:20 GMT

I'd have to say that ingratitude really bothers me. I helped out a friend who was really in dire straits; with money and other things. She finally got a job (I wrote her a glowing letter of recomommendation) and then I didn't hear from her again...until she posted that she'd been out with some "good friends" and of course I wasn't included.

I asked her about it and received such a nasty response that it was like a slap in the face. I was really shocked. Needless to say, I haven't tried to reconnect with her.

Re: what bothers you?

QVCkitty1 — Sat, 28 Jan 2023 17:09:41 GMT

Hypocrisy and intentional cruelty.

Re: what bothers you?

kindred cats — Sat, 28 Jan 2023 17:13:02 GMT

To be honest? Too many things bother me to mention, so I try to live the best life possible and get along and be kind.

Re: what bothers you?

tarsmom — Sat, 28 Jan 2023 17:19:02 GMT

I had a childhood friend who was always my friend until I was pregnant and her marriage was failing. During our teen years things were good as long as she had a boyfriend before me, had a better car than me, a better job than me, and got married before me. Once I got pregnant at age 25, she shunned me.
10 years later she called me and told me she missed me so much (she was remarried and had 2 daughters) which she knew I always wanted a girl and I had a boy. I told her I hope you have a nice life but I can't reopen that door again.

5 years ago (I'm now 62 at this point) she 'friended' me on Facebook. Um, no......did you not hear me 20+ years ago???? I don't hate her but no.......you're not getting back with me.

I believe she's trying to relieve her conscience.

The one good thing was she introduced me to my husband and we're celebrating 45 years in July.

Sometimes......friends aren't REAL friends, they're frenemies.

Re: what bothers you?

FancyPhillyshopper — Sat, 28 Jan 2023 17:15:46 GMT

Maybe she was embarrassed that you helped her out and now, unfortunately, your friendship has changed from equals to one being beholden to the other.

No good deed goes unpunished!

Re: what bothers you?

chrystaltree — Sat, 28 Jan 2023 17:16:50 GMT

My guess is she wasn't a true friend. She came to you when she was desperate and in need because she knew that you would help her. She used you until she didn't need you anymore.

Re: what bothers you?

rms1954 — Sat, 28 Jan 2023 17:17:54 GMT

I'd be hurt and upset for sure.

Re: what bothers you?

deepwaterdotter — Sat, 28 Jan 2023 17:18:11 GMT

Displays of willful ignorance.

Re: what bothers you?

gidgetgh — Sat, 28 Jan 2023 17:24:09 GMT

Intentional cruelty and belittling.

To be honest, I see quite a bit of it on these boards and it really bothers me. I don't understand why people go out of their way to be intentionally cruel, here or anywhere.

Re: what bothers you?

deepwaterdotter — Sat, 28 Jan 2023 17:27:46 GMT

@gidgetgh I've always felt that such posters craved attention.

Re: what bothers you?

ThinkingOutLoud — Sat, 28 Jan 2023 17:29:32 GMT

@GoneButNotForgotten wrote:
I'd have to say that ingratitude really bothers me. I helped out a friend who was really in dire straits, with money and other things. She finally got a job (I wrote her a letter of commendation) and I didn't hear from her again...until she posted that she'd been out with some "good friends" and of course I wasn't included.

I asked her about it and, boy, did I get a slap in the face. She couldn't have been nastier. I was surprised and shocked.

Sorry that happened.

When I'm faced with this kind of thing (ie ingratitude, excluded, etc), I've learned to ask myself when I may have done something similar. It helps

me be less judgmental and hopefully improve where I need to.

Mote and beam...

Re: what bothers you?

NicksmomESQ — Sat, 28 Jan 2023 17:28:15 GMT

Man's inhumanity to man, has always bothered me.

Re: what bothers you?

Oznell — Sat, 28 Jan 2023 17:43:50 GMT

I'm sorry that happened to you, @GoneButNotForgotten -- very hurtful. You were the sort of friend most of us appreciate and value in the highest.

Looking closest to home, I'd say the things about myself that bother me the most, are typical sins of human nature-- my stubbornness, pride, selfishness. Common foibles but ones that must be struggled with continually. Luckily, I have help.

Re: what bothers you?

Imaoldhippie — Sat, 28 Jan 2023 17:55:18 GMT

@GoneButNotForgotten .............You did the right thing helping what you thought was a friend. Be comforted that you helped her.

Now you know that she was not a friend and is ungrateful person. Have nothing more to do with her. I bet she has done the same to others.

Re: what bothers you?

Justholdingon — Sat, 28 Jan 2023 18:25:03 GMT

when people display ignorance in the form of racism and prejudice and think it's funny.

when people are mean to others just for the fun because they think it's fun for them..

Re: what bothers you?

RedTop — Sat, 28 Jan 2023 18:43:14 GMT

I do a pretty good job of not letting "things" bother me. If I'm directly involved in a situation, I deal with it and then let it go. I don't dwell on anything.

Re: what bothers you?

Foxxee — Sat, 28 Jan 2023 18:50:12 GMT

There are quite a few things that bother me, but right now what comes to mind is.....

People who can't distinguish propaganda from the truth.

People who refuse to believe or see the truth even when facts are presented right in front of their eyes. These people don't want to hear or see anything negative that will burst the bubble they have been living in.

Also hypocrisy. It appears to be contagious and rampant right now.

What's so shocking to me is how many people have succumbed to this thinking. It's more of a recent troubling phenomena.

Re: what bothers you?

Mersha — Sat, 28 Jan 2023 18:54:56 GMT

@Foxxee Unfortunately, I don't see that problem ending anytime soon.

When people cannot agree on what the FACTS are, there is no coming together or negotiating.

The division just keeps growing.

Re: what bothers you?

threecees — Sat, 28 Jan 2023 18:58:44 GMT

Any person who intentionally hurts a kid or animal. That probably bothers

me the most.

Re: what bothers you?

AnjalenaQVC — Sat, 28 Jan 2023 19:11:51 GMT

This post has been removed by QVC because it is political.