topic Re: Joyless Birthday in Community Chat

Joyless Birthday

Jordan2 — Wed, 13 Jul 2022 20:12:24 GMT

Today is my birthday, I don't say this to garner well wishes, I have a point to make. This is my second birthday without my mom, I never miss her more than on my birthday. She would be the first to wish me a Happy Birthday, she would give me too much money but she was happy to. She would always say "show me what you bought". My mother gave me unconditional love, I wasn't always her favorite child but in her later years I was and knew it.

Re: Joyless Birthday

qualitygal — Wed, 13 Jul 2022 20:17:27 GMT

Happy Birthday. I understand your heart today. Just imagine your dear mom sending you hugs and kisses and watching over you. I believe their spirit is here, and while we can't see them, you can still talk to them. Visit with her today, and know she sends you her love on this special day for you.

Re: Joyless Birthday

Renata22 — Wed, 13 Jul 2022 20:20:34 GMT

Happy Birthday! I know what you mean about missing your mom. Mine has been gone for years and I still miss her just as much as ever. We were best friends and had so much fun together. I didn't always do what she wanted me to, but she loved me through it all.

Hope you have a very happy day. I'm sure your mom would want you to.

Re: Joyless Birthday

Q4u — Wed, 13 Jul 2022 20:27:45 GMT

I hope your birthday is filled with the Joy of your Mom remembered. Believe me I know. I lost both my parents around 26 years ago. I remember every moment. I was an only child and I took it one day at a time, sometimes an hour at a time and at the worst moments.... a moment at a time. Thankfully the worst moments do fade and the ones that remain are worth remembering. Take care and please take the time to enjoy the joy that is out there.

Re: Joyless Birthday

chiclets — Wed, 13 Jul 2022 20:28:43 GMT

Jordon enjoy your birthday with the given gift of forever love your mother gave to you on this day.

You are not able to " see her say those words" but clearly you feel them within you being. This is the joy she gives to you today.

Smile for the smile you miss, this is the gift she might like you to share with her today, in memory.

Buy a balloon, let it fly high, and wish yourself a happy birthday to share with her in heaven.

Blessings to you on you Birthday.

Re: Joyless Birthday

candys mine — Wed, 13 Jul 2022 20:29:34 GMT

It's so very hard when your Mother is no longer here. This day makes you sad.

Maybe turn it around and make the day all about the woman who gae birth to you. Pull out the pictures. From first to last. Make a meal you remember her making.

You say she gave you money on your birthday. If you can afford it maybe honor all she did for you by making a donation to a charity in her memory on your birthday.

To help another is to share her love.

Re: Joyless Birthday

SouthernBee — Wed, 13 Jul 2022 20:31:45 GMT

@Jordan2 : Totally agree and understand. I was 22 when my Mom died and I didn't remember my dad because I was 22 months old when he died.

Try your best to cherish your precious memories.🤗♥️🙏

Re: Joyless Birthday

lgfan — Wed, 13 Jul 2022 20:44:33 GMT

If you want to feel better you may need to pay it forward and indulge someone on their birthday the way your mother indulged you on your birthday. You may want to buy a gift for an underprivileged child or make a donation to your mother's favorite charity.

Re: Joyless Birthday

Another new name Sue — Wed, 13 Jul 2022 20:35:00 GMT

It seems most women miss their mothers for many years after they are gone and think of them often. I certainly do. We understand your sadness, Jordan. She wouldn't want you to be sad, she would want you to keep the good memories close your heart.

Re: Joyless Birthday

WeezieWeeze — Wed, 13 Jul 2022 20:37:07 GMT

I'm new to the q boards. Just wanted to say I understand. I lost my mother 25 years ago and can say it was the worst day of my life. I'm in my 50's now and still miss her every single day. It is a great loss, I know. May it comfort you to know others care and keep the happy memories alive by talking about her. Happy Birthday to you.

Re: Joyless Birthday

Porcelain — Wed, 13 Jul 2022 20:38:51 GMT

All of us become "orphans" at some point in our lives when our parents pass. I dread it. Hasn't happened to me yet, but I absolutely dread it. I understand what you are talking about @Jordan2. Just know that everyone who has experienced it and who will experience it is holding your hand.

Re: Joyless Birthday

Kachina624 — Wed, 13 Jul 2022 20:46:04 GMT

@Jordan2 Let me tell you what happened on my birthday which was last month. I was a little down in the dumps because, like you, only one person wished me a happy birthday, my sister.

It was a Friday, my car had been in a body shop most of the week having some repair work done. The called me about 4pm to say it was ready and they were sending someone to pick me up. This lovely very young man arrived and we drove to the shop. He asked me how my day was going and I told him it was my birthday and I'd been sitting a!one at home all day. We had a nice conversation.

Got the car and drove back home. About an hour later, the doorbell rang and there was my young man and another mechanic standing there with a small birthday cake in their hands. I couldn't believe it. Nothing like that ever happened to me before. First birthday cake I've had for years and years. It was so sweet of them,dont you agree?

I don't want you to be forgotten so, happy birthday to you!

Re: Joyless Birthday

Burnsite — Wed, 13 Jul 2022 20:49:33 GMT

Condolences, Jordan---My worst birthday was my Mother's initial birthday after her death a month earlier.

Losing parents is like losing a big part of your past; and for me, it was like losing my best friends. It does lighten over time, but it's a deep sadness.

Re: Joyless Birthday

spumoni99 — Wed, 13 Jul 2022 20:52:24 GMT

There really isn't anything like the unconditional love of a mother, mine has been gone for 22 years and I still miss her. I know all of us can't replace your mother but sending you birthday love and wishes for a happy birthday.

My daughter always remembers my birthday and makes it special thank goodness because my husband isn't good about it!

Re: Joyless Birthday

on the bay — Wed, 13 Jul 2022 20:55:55 GMT

@Jordan2,

I told my daughters the other day, no one tells us how hard it will be to lose your mother. We talk about it often. It is so unbelivable that she is not here with us like they were all our lives.

Then it makes me think of all our own passing from this life. How could we not think of this? So it can be many sad times.

I'm still between crying all of a sudden at something that reminds me of her in good or times of her suffering.

I'm still trying to "feel" her in heaven and wherever she is. And to try to feel with all my heart that she is "here" with me. Maybe not physically but with all her love and spirit.

And I hope my children feel the same when I'm not here on earth too.

It really makes us feel like there are 2 lives-those here and those in heaven or wherever we believe.And I want so much to find her.Sometimes I do-a sign or something from esp nature.

My mother did not believe in any sort of heaven or afterlife but I still feel like she is there!

I think she must be with you. Maybe encouraged you to write about her and to share your sorrow with others, just thinking about her,

even though we may not meet in person.

Re: Joyless Birthday

Imaoldhippie — Wed, 13 Jul 2022 20:58:14 GMT

@Jordan2 ...........Happy Birthday!

You are very fortunate to have had a mother as you described. Lots of good memories for you to look back on.

Re: Joyless Birthday

meallen616 — Wed, 13 Jul 2022 21:00:50 GMT

@Jordan2,

Re: Joyless Birthday

Redsoxmom1 — Wed, 13 Jul 2022 21:01:00 GMT

Jordan, your post brought me to tears. I had my first birthday without my mom in June. It was the hardest thing. She passed away right before Christmas. I know how you feel. I am sending you a birthday hug. Your mom is all around you.

Re: Joyless Birthday

on the bay — Wed, 13 Jul 2022 21:06:11 GMT

@Redsoxmom1, @Jordan2,

both your posts and I'm crying along with you. Maybe all our mothers are here with us especially now!

Re: Joyless Birthday

QVCkitty1 — Wed, 13 Jul 2022 21:07:11 GMT

I understand. If we are very lucky we had the kind of mom who made everything special. We can learn to adjust and make do, but it will never be the same. 🌺🌷🌺