topic Re: One Down in Community Chat

One Down

Jordan2 — Sat, 27 Nov 2021 03:16:43 GMT

The holiday season isn't a happy time for me. Thanksgiving is over, I just have to get through Christmas and New Years.

Re: One Down

Porcelain — Sat, 27 Nov 2021 03:22:47 GMT

@Jordan2 wrote:
The holiday season isn't a happy time for me. Thanksgiving is over, I just have to get through Christmas and New Years.

I hear you. I'm sorry you have to deal with this.

Re: One Down

1Snickers — Sat, 27 Nov 2021 03:36:54 GMT

@Jordan2 Holidays are a hard time for some people. I guess when everyone else is celebrating if we are alone it can be depressing. It was hard for me alone last year.

I miss my parents and husband but have those memories. I decorate for myself because I enjoy it. This year was harder next year I'll do less!
I have friends who get depressed especially at Christmas. I understand not being happy when others are.
But you made it through Thanksgiving and you can make it through Christmas and New Years. They are just another day and will pass.

You are not alone!
😒 ☹️ 🥺 🥲 😌🙂

Re: One Down

Jordan2 — Sat, 27 Nov 2021 03:50:23 GMT

@1Snickers wrote:
@Jordan2 Holidays are a hard time for some people. I guess when everyone else is celebrating if we are alone it can be depressing. It was hard for me alone last year.
I miss my parents and husband but have those memories. I decorate for myself because I enjoy it. This year was harder next year I'll do less!
I have friends who get depressed especially at Christmas. I understand not being happy when others are.
But you made it through Thanksgiving and you can make it through Christmas and New Years. They are just another day and will pass.
You are not alone!
😒 ☹️ 🥺 🥲 😌🙂

@1Snickers I don't begrudge people who love the holiday season and really are into it, that isn't my experience. My sister always goes to her sister-in-law with her family for Thanksgiving and I do Thanksgiving alone.

Re: One Down

gabstoomuch — Sat, 27 Nov 2021 08:43:42 GMT

Same. This is the time of year I just get through every day looking forward for December 26th.

I don't get depressed. I just don't think the holidays are presented on TV commercials as realistically as they really are. I don't know any couples that run out the front door in their PJ's to two brand new sparkling cars with big red bows on them The reason for the holiday season was lost a long time ago imo.

So many broken families, and stressed out kids because they have to go wherever a court deems they go, even if it is not where they should be.

This year will be especially painful for those who lost a loved one to illness the past two years. This is the first year of people getting together so it will intensify the loss for some (many) families

I always prepare early in November by reminding myself to be gentle on myself during the holidays. I know I hate them. I know many people love the holidays. I wish I was one of them but I am not. I just plod through each day until it is over.

Although, If you watch QVC you can find humor listening to the hosts babbling on about what an amazing gift this would be for your friend or your uncle, or even the mailman! (and it is an item that costs $350.00). They truly make me laugh sometimes.

Only have 1 month to go! Another season will be done. New Year's Eve doesn't bother me, I enjoy the NYE events on TV, all snuggled up in my blanket, thankful I have a whole year to not worry about it again.

Re: One Down

goldensrbest — Sat, 27 Nov 2021 11:42:44 GMT

I have tried to live with this since 1998, my son died, and 2013 my husband, i always dread this time of year,use to be my favorite time of year,i absolutely miss how it was.

Re: One Down

Jordan2 — Sat, 27 Nov 2021 11:46:39 GMT

@goldensrbest wrote:
I have tried to live with this since 1998, my son died, and 2013 my husband, i always dread this time of year,use to be my favorite time of year,i absolutely miss how it was.

@goldensrbest I'm so sorry for your loss, take care of yourself.

Re: One Down

CalminHeart — Sat, 27 Nov 2021 13:12:12 GMT

@Jordan2 wrote:
The holiday season isn't a happy time for me. Thanksgiving is over, I just have to get through Christmas and New Years.

I have always liked Thanksgiving but dread Christmas. Christmas is just a sad time for me. I'd love to be able to skip from Black Friday to New Year's Day.

Re: One Down

PINKdogWOOD — Sat, 27 Nov 2021 14:07:26 GMT

@goldensrbest Holidays used to be fun for my family too but then family members chose to drop out of the family and took (her) family with her. This would be my older sister. No one could figure out what happened to her but her clan either followed her or were told by her to not be nice anymore. We were all left just shaking our heads as to what might have happened. She absolutely broke my Dad's heart. It all seemed to not bother my mother.

Then my dear Dad died a week before Christmas 2005. The holiday season was never the same again.

Personally, I hate the holidays. I hate that the public if you will thinks it's all about buying stuff for others. I'm not into spending money on others, buying stuff for others. This is not what the holidays was to my Dad. All he wanted was all of us with him, enjoying each others' company, laughing together, catching up, sharing great meals together.

It's dark and dreary outside, cold this time of year. I look forward to the Winter Solstice when the days begin again to get longer with more light outside and in our lives. Give me the first day of SPRING when everything comes back to life and new beginnings start again.

Re: One Down

1Snickers — Sat, 27 Nov 2021 14:33:35 GMT

@goldensrbest And all: I love Christmas, the decorating (my house is finished and two trees!)

This December 22 marks the 17the year since my husband passed away. His loyal Jack Russell saw my son and me through Christmas and passed on New Years Eve.
I buried my dog's ashes with my husband at hIs request. I missed them so much!
I found a Jack Russell puppy the Spring after my husband passed. Krypto lived 16 years. He trained himself to be a hearing dog for me, he also trained Snickers to help me too.
It would be so lonely without a dog or pet.
I have a son and granddaughter nearby so see them often, but Thanksgiving and Christmas will never be the same.
My house glows with battery candles (and husband can't complain I'm wasting money!) I don't have to cook unless I want to. I go on long walks with my dog and lunches with friends. I do Tai Chi daily for balance and stress relief. I count my blessings.
🐶 🐾 🚶🏻‍♀️ 🎄🕯 🎁 ❤️‍🩹

Re: One Down

spent2much — Sat, 27 Nov 2021 18:06:42 GMT

A few years ago I lost my brother, my mother and my best friend - all within a year. That was a tough year. I purposely did not remember the dates of their deaths because I didn't want to relive their deaths year after year.

After that our first son died on Dec. 21, a date which, unfortunately, I remembered... I guess because it was so close to Christmas.

Christmas used to be so much fun - hustle and bustle. Now I hold fast to The One who was born on Christmas, then died for my sin, then rose again to give me victory over death. I have perfect peace.

Re: One Down

RetRN — Sat, 27 Nov 2021 18:32:08 GMT

Everyone experiences this time of year differently. I try to be thankful and grateful for the good times of the past years, the memories, and the blessings. We all have experienced loss, sadness, grief, and pain throughout our lives and will continue to do so. Try to focus on the positive and let go of the negative. It is important to take care of yourself.

Re: One Down

tarsmom — Sun, 28 Nov 2021 01:40:13 GMT

I am a very sensitive person and reading your responses made me tear up.

What I do is try to be grateful for the basics:

1. my dad died of esophagus cancer and had a feeding tube the last six months of his life. You know what he wanted? To be able to drink a Coke. He was not allowed to have anything - nothing for that last six months. It was awful. **So, I am grateful I can drink and eat.

2. my beautiful friend and coworker just died from ALS. She was 53. Her husband had to carry her to the bathroom. They were only married 5 years. He was a saint. She couldn't even hold her head up. This tore me up thinking about this beautiful woman who carried herself like a queen. How could this happen to someone who took care of herself, didn't smoke or drink and finally found her wonderful husband. Tears....... ***So, when I have aches and pains and a husband with many health issues, I think to myself, "I can shower and use the bathroom and take a walk with my dog."

3. I underestimated what age 66 would look like. I miss the heck out of my mom. She was so wonderful. Same with my mother-in-law. The holidays will never be the same. I could go down a hole if I allowed myself. **I am grateful my mother and mother-in-law lived until their mid-90's. I know people whose moms died when they were very young.

My only complaint and I have to deal with it is when people always ask (I know....to be polite....) Are you all ready for Christmas? Did you get all your shopping done? What are you doing for Christmas?

You know, life is about seasons. It's a new season now. Things don't stay the same forever. You won't always have your family and friends. Your kids will grow up and maybe move away. Enjoy each season and then move along to the next one.

And be grateful that you can drink a Coke.

Re: One Down

Jordan2 — Sun, 28 Nov 2021 01:48:13 GMT

I try not to give in to the sadness I feel this time of year. Really all I have left is a sister and her family but we aren't close. I was in the mall today and Santa waved to me and wished me a Merry Christmas, it did make me smile.

Re: One Down

spent2much — Mon, 29 Nov 2021 04:33:14 GMT

@tarsmom **HUGS** to you! ❤❤❤❤❤

Re: One Down

Jordan2 — Thu, 02 Dec 2021 15:34:32 GMT

I was watching Kelly Clarkson's Christmas special, she sang a song she wrote and mentioned how not everyone is happy around the holidays ( it's alright to feel that way). She mentioned Hard Candy Christmas by Dolly Parton, I wasn't familiar with it and listened, not a good song to listen to if you're already sad. Also I saw a Toyota commercial with a little girl collecting books to give the elderly man for his bookstore with Rainbow by Kacey Musgraves playing in the background, C'MON, what are you doing to me?!

Re: One Down

Jordan2 — Mon, 20 Dec 2021 12:09:19 GMT

I hope everyone who struggles this time of year is doing well. I have to say NYC needs to cancel the Time Square New Years Eve celebration for obvious reasons.

Re: One Down

Duckncover — Wed, 22 Dec 2021 02:06:56 GMT

I am sorry you are having to deal with such loss...the holidays seem to make it harder to remember the best memories of all when you are surrounded with everyone else wrapped up in making new memories. Prayers you feel contentment and comfort and look forward to 2022 with renewed spirit.

Re: One Down

Hippiified — Wed, 22 Dec 2021 04:58:59 GMT

@Jordan2 wrote:
I hope everyone who struggles this time of year is doing well. I have to say NYC needs to cancel the Time Square New Years Eve celebration for obvious reasons.

@Jordan2 I agree!

Re: One Down

beach-mom — Wed, 22 Dec 2021 05:47:33 GMT

I am so sorry for those of you who are hurting. @spent2much - you said it perfectly.

My mom died right after Thanksgiving years ago. She had already started shopping. I wanted to crawl into bed and pull the covers up, but I had young children who were waiting for Santa Claus. I was actually hosting a neighborhood cookie exchange the night after her funeral. Another neighbor had it and postponed it so I could be there. What got me through was a lot of prayers sent by many.

In this month of December we have lost two good friends. I am sad for their families, and I hope I can be there for them.

I am also praying for the families affected by tornadoes and other disasters, and for the family of the young man who died in the QVC fire.

It might not seem possible now, but all of us will experience the peace and the comfort of this season, maybe in very small ways. I hope all of us get a chance to take a breath and do what we want to do! (((HUGS)))