topic Re: Have You Ever Had Hoarding Sadness? in Community Chat

Have You Ever Had Hoarding Sadness?

RinaRina — Tue, 04 May 2021 19:27:50 GMT

I finally came to terms with the fact that the racks of professional "designer" clothes I'd stored for over 10 years ago had to go. The "classics" ... I'll never wear again.

So beautiful ... and so useless.

Anyone remember St. John knits?

Times are so different now.

Re: Have You Ever Had Hoarding Sadness?

QP Doll — Tue, 04 May 2021 19:26:18 GMT

Re: Have You Ever Had Hoarding Sadness?

Another new name Sue — Tue, 04 May 2021 19:27:42 GMT

Find a thrift shop you want to support and donate there. To someone else they won't be "useless."

Re: Have You Ever Had Hoarding Sadness?

RinaRina — Tue, 04 May 2021 19:29:05 GMT

They're gone.

Goodwill.

Re: Have You Ever Had Hoarding Sadness?

SunValley — Tue, 04 May 2021 19:29:31 GMT

@RinaRina perhaps you can think of it this way...you have given new life to those special pieces. Another woman will wear and enjoy your classic wardrobe who might not have otherwise had the pleasure had you not donated. You passed on some joy.

Re: Have You Ever Had Hoarding Sadness?

QP Doll — Tue, 04 May 2021 19:29:53 GMT

Times have indeed changed, & it's not just clothing!!

I would love to go back & have just one day in the 50's.......Or even the later 40's!

Re: Have You Ever Had Hoarding Sadness?

Mistreatedbycs — Tue, 04 May 2021 19:32:50 GMT

@RinaRina

Depends how old they are. There are speciality stores that want "steam punk" style clothes. Also, they want clothing of the Marilyn Monroe era.

I used to deal with vintage clothing, the 40's & 50's sell well, other than that, it has really little to no value.

Before I got into vintage merchandise, I bought a lot of expensive clothes, I thought I would actually get some money from these gently used pieces of clothing, wide eyes open, the answer is no. If you do buy expensive brand new clothing, you have less than a year to sell it, gives you very limited time to actually wearing it.

Re: Have You Ever Had Hoarding Sadness?

BlueFinch — Tue, 04 May 2021 19:37:35 GMT

@RinaRina Oh for sure, I think most have felt this sadness.

I can't tell you how many times I've looked at some old favorites and tried to convince myself they'd be fashionable again, one day.

Then a decade, or two goes by, and well, the realization strikes that I may not live long enough to see my old favorites trending again, if ever.

I'm also more aware that it's not always about the clothes. It's about the memories surrounding them. Maybe better times, maybe special ones. Heck, I can't even get rid of my work scrubs because of the memories they evoke.

Re: Have You Ever Had Hoarding Sadness?

QVCkitty1 — Tue, 04 May 2021 19:54:20 GMT

@BlueFinch wrote:
@RinaRina Oh for sure, I think most have felt this sadness.

I can't tell you how many times I've looked at some old favorites and tried to convince myself they'd be fashionable again, one day.

Then a decade, or two goes by, and well, the realization strikes that I may not live long enough to see my old favorites trending again, if ever.

I'm also more aware that it's not always about the clothes. It's about the memories surrounding them. Maybe better times, maybe special ones. Heck, I can't even get rid of my work scrubs because of the memories they evoke.

@BlueFinch , I hear you , I saved the warm up jacket that I wore over my scrubs, the bandage scissors are still in the pocket with my badge. Silly right ?

Re: Have You Ever Had Hoarding Sadness?

drizzellla — Tue, 04 May 2021 21:27:25 GMT

Thanks RinaRina for bringing up the subject.

I started a new donation pile. I am trying to find room in my closet and dresser for my summer clothes. And yes, I am only keeping one navy blazer and one black blazer. And I probably never wear either again.

Re: Have You Ever Had Hoarding Sadness?

godi — Tue, 04 May 2021 21:32:36 GMT

@RinaRina I loved Saint John Knits. Nice well made clothing. So hard to let go of not just clothes the life you lived in them.

Re: Have You Ever Had Hoarding Sadness?

RinaRina — Tue, 04 May 2021 22:06:00 GMT

@godi wrote:
@RinaRina I loved Saint John Knits. Nice well made clothing. So hard to let go of not just clothes the life you lived in them.

-------------------------------------

@godi ,

Re: "not just clothes the life you lived in them."

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What you said hit a cord with me. The life ... I've left behind.

By letting go of those clothes, I've let go of that life.

And, let me tell you, it's taken me a LONG time to "let go".

What was I thinking!!??

Re: Have You Ever Had Hoarding Sadness?

Buffalogal47 — Tue, 04 May 2021 22:13:33 GMT

I am in the process of relocating to another state and so I have to give away a lot of clothes that I have had for years but never wear any more. It's very hard to decide what goes and what stays. I had some beautiful Bob Mackie real silk blouses and pants, a Dennis Basso suede coat with a fake mink lining, a heavy Leslie Fay winter maxi coat (made in the USA, so that tells you how old it is) that along with a lot of other really nice things that I donated to a homeless women's shelter. I hope that they help someone get back on their feet. I also have to get rid of some of my furniture, like my 30 year old dining room table, chairs, buffet and hutch that nobody wants and my mother's sofa that not even a charity will take. It isn't the objects that are hard to let go of; it's the memories associated with them. But, like my DD says, we always have the memories; nobody can take those away. The furniture, clothes, knicknacks , and other things are just inanimate objects.

Re: Have You Ever Had Hoarding Sadness?

Susan Louise — Wed, 05 May 2021 00:55:16 GMT

This might seem like an overwhelming thought for those struggling with purging clothes, but any clothes you are on the fence about, put them on and look in the mirror....seriously. If you don't LOVE it, let it go. Just looking at it on a hanger or in a drawer really isn't enough.

For those items of clothes you may have waited decades to wear again, put them on. I can guarantee that most won't bring you the same joy they once did. I was really surprised when I did this...

If it's sentimental, take a pic of it for memories, then let it go.

I know that this process has worked for me

Now, the only clothes I have been purging the past 2-3 years are ones that are too big because I have been losing weight. I have nothing in the closet or in drawers I don't love. I only have a small pile of clothes I don't fit into...yet. They are pieces that are the next size down so I'll have some that will fit when I reach my goal weight.

Re: Have You Ever Had Hoarding Sadness?

gertrudecloset — Tue, 04 May 2021 22:23:26 GMT

@RinaRina wrote:
I finally came to terms with the fact that the racks of professional "designer" clothes I'd stored for over 10 years ago had to go. The "classics" ... I'll never wear again.
So beautiful ... and so useless.
Anyone remember St. John knits?
Times are so different now.

Not have I only never had it ~ I've never heard of it. Do you think you have a general hoarding problem? If parting with things you had made you sad, it could be a form of depression that you could talk to someone about.

Re: Have You Ever Had Hoarding Sadness?

Mom2Dogs — Tue, 04 May 2021 22:25:54 GMT

Yes...no St John's knits for me, but I have some nice things that are overly dressy even for church any more.

The fabric is so nice on most things I just hate to let go.

Re: Have You Ever Had Hoarding Sadness?

gertrudecloset — Tue, 04 May 2021 22:25:58 GMT

@BlueFinch wrote:
@RinaRina Oh for sure, I think most have felt this sadness.

I can't tell you how many times I've looked at some old favorites and tried to convince myself they'd be fashionable again, one day.

Then a decade, or two goes by, and well, the realization strikes that I may not live long enough to see my old favorites trending again, if ever.

I'm also more aware that it's not always about the clothes. It's about the memories surrounding them. Maybe better times, maybe special ones. Heck, I can't even get rid of my work scrubs because of the memories they evoke.

@BlueFinchI have never felt sad at having to part with older items. I typically find myself delighted if someone wants what I have to offer. I share a great deal and find great comfort in that. Not sadness so your assertion doesn't apply to me at least! I do see your point, however.

Re: Have You Ever Had Hoarding Sadness?

Pearlee — Tue, 04 May 2021 23:09:28 GMT

@Buffalogal47 wrote:
I am in the process of relocating to another state and so I have to give away a lot of clothes that I have had for years but never wear any more. It's very hard to decide what goes and what stays. I had some beautiful Bob Mackie real silk blouses and pants, a Dennis Basso suede coat with a fake mink lining, a heavy Leslie Fay winter maxi coat (made in the USA, so that tells you how old it is) that along with a lot of other really nice things that I donated to a homeless women's shelter. I hope that they help someone get back on their feet. I also have to get rid of some of my furniture, like my 30 year old dining room table, chairs, buffet and hutch that nobody wants and my mother's sofa that not even a charity will take. It isn't the objects that are hard to let go of; it's the memories associated with them. But, like my DD says, we always have the memories; nobody can take those away. The furniture, clothes, knicknacks , and other things are just inanimate objects.

@Buffalogal47. With regard to what your DD said, the memories go too when dementia sets in. 😥

Re: Have You Ever Had Hoarding Sadness?

RinaRina — Tue, 04 May 2021 23:15:35 GMT

@Mom2Dogs wrote:
Yes...no St John's knits for me, but I have some nice things that are overly dressy even for church any more.

The fabric is so nice on most things I just hate to let go.

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Re: "The fabric is so nice on most things I just hate to let go."

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OMG! Fabric? Houndstooth! I disposed of all my Houndstooth jackets. They weren't just black & white. I had multiple colors and they were so classy looking. I don't know what the fabric is called (maybe not "houndstooth"), but some of the jackets looked like they were hand-woven and the fabric was very heavy with a nice lining to keep the shape with square shoulders. When I wore them, I'd get compliments all the time.

Oh well ... in the age of covid, I have no place to wear such items. .. And, I'm retired, ... and I don't have a waistline anymore.

Re: Have You Ever Had Hoarding Sadness?

drizzellla — Wed, 05 May 2021 00:21:28 GMT

@Susan Louise wrote:
This might seem like an overwhelming thought for those struggling with purging clothes, but any clothes you are on the fence about, put them on and look in the mirror....seriously. If you don't LOVE it, let it go. Just looking at it on a hanger or in a drawer really isn't enough.

For those items of clothes you may have waited decades to wear again, put them on. I can guarantee that most won't bring you the same joy they once did. I was really surprised when I did this...

If it's sentimental, take a pic of it for memories, then let it go.

I know that this process has worked for me

Now, the only clothes I have been purging the past 2-3 years are ones that are too big because I have been losing weight. I have nothing in the closet or in drawers I don't love. I only have a small pile of clothes I don't fit into...yet. They are pieces that are the next size down so I'll have some that will fit when I reach my goal weight.

You got that right. I must have tried on 25 pairs of pants today. Most of them were rarely worn and some never worn. And it quickly became apparent why I did not wear them. I did not like the way they fit.

So hopefully some lucky lady or more will get a bunch of pristine pants at the thrift store. It feels good when you donate stuff that looks like it was never worn.