topic Re: Observer or Participant? in Community Chat

Observer or Participant?

Susan in California — Fri, 02 Apr 2021 04:28:44 GMT

When I was watching The Crown, there was a scene

where the actress playing Prince Philip's mother said she felt more like an observer than a participant

as she had grown older.

I have noticed some changes as I age.

I am definitely becoming more of an observer...

Our grown sons and their wives often talk about what we should all do...(not during pandemic):

attend performances

travel

go to certain restaurants

(Just a few examples)

etc...

My husband still wants to do everything, and I am grateful for his enthusiasm. Myself, less and less.

How about you?

Re: Observer or Participant?

Desertdi — Fri, 02 Apr 2021 04:44:10 GMT

Depends on the activity.......I would no longer be interested in sitting for hours in a stadium watching a football game........but I WOULD BE first in line at the opening of The International Auto Show........

Re: Observer or Participant?

phoenixbrd — Fri, 02 Apr 2021 04:46:17 GMT

Balance and what is appropriate at the time:

To observe is to reflect and contemplate....important

To participate is to interact and enjoy company/activites ....important

We all do both to some degree.....at times, one might seem more important than the other.

Re: Observer or Participant?

Annabellethecat66 — Fri, 02 Apr 2021 04:56:18 GMT

I guess my friends and I might be called a participant, if participant means going about one’s life cautious....but enjoying life.

How about this for describing my outlook on life as “cautiously optimistic”?

I eat out at restaurants with my bottle of hand sanitizer sitting on the table.

When I get in my car I wipe down everything I might have touched ( even down to the zipper and leather handle on my purse).

It just takes a minute before I’m off to the next chore.

I have always done similar to that. I’ve been called a ‘germ a phobe’.

But the one thing I do that I consider the most important is that I don’t touch my face ...at all..ever.

Oh! I forgot to say I go to Walmart and the grocery store. I eat out at least 4 times a week.

Remember, I said my outlook on life is “cautiously optimistic”.

Re: Observer or Participant?

ECBG — Fri, 02 Apr 2021 05:43:49 GMT

I do what I want. I wear my mask, and am out almost a month from the last shot.

I think an observer stands back and watches people have fun and live but doesn't actually get out there.

Re: Observer or Participant?

on the bay — Sat, 03 Apr 2021 00:26:51 GMT

@Susan in California,

Yes, for me too, less and less.

I'm glad it's not just me. Interesting.

Maybe it could also just be being content where we are, or not, just tired or weary of doing doing going going.

Or it is not the right thing or time to make me feel like a participant.

I guess for me there are so many different reasons for being one or the other. But more like an observer more this year than last.

I have definitely felt like I no longer want to join anything this year and don't want to rejoin things I had, nor make new friendships. The old ones are enough if we ever see each other.

In a way it is a little alarming.

I guess I'm just tired!

If this is not an all over the place answer I don't know what is!😳

Re: Observer or Participant?

tobes — Fri, 02 Apr 2021 12:36:56 GMT

@Susan in California Since the pademic, I have become more introspect...thinking about my life and experiences along the way. Most are positive and happy memories.

Re: Observer or Participant?

Still Raining — Fri, 02 Apr 2021 13:50:40 GMT

It seems a function of age. The torch s passed. Sometimes it is a little hard to take, but our work is done. Can be a relief if all is well behind us 😉

Re: Observer or Participant?

deepwaterdotter — Fri, 02 Apr 2021 14:18:48 GMT

An enlightened participant. I tend to do my research before 'jumping in'.

Re: Observer or Participant?

Texasmouse — Fri, 02 Apr 2021 14:43:42 GMT

Very much an observer, if even that. I'd make a great hermit but I still work, full time.

Re: Observer or Participant?

blueroses47 — Fri, 02 Apr 2021 16:19:22 GMT

Lately I feel like I want to participate in less and less. I don't know if it is a by-product of age, this pandemic shut-down, or depression.

I think of things I used to enjoy doing and I just feel fine if I don't do them in the future. Like travel. Like going into NYC to see shows, shop, or dine. Even eating out in general is not something I'm tending to miss as much as other people. Okay, when I can, I guess I will enjoy going out for a meal, but not in the way I used to.

I'm having trouble with my vision, and have been postponing dealing with cataract surgery, because of Covid, but I'm going to just have to see the doctors about this in the near future, covid or no. Maybe that's contributing to my feelings, but I'm guessing most of how I feel is stemming from age.

I just have this feeling that I've done the things I wanted to and I'm fine with not doing them as much as before, even when I'm free to once again.

Re: Observer or Participant?

LindaSal — Fri, 02 Apr 2021 19:05:56 GMT

I agree with @phoenixbird that there should be a balance. I can see a small amount of disinterest in certain activities and I am not sure if it's from ageing or from the events of the past year or both. Either way I guess it's most likely part of life but there are things I miss very much and am getting excited to do again.