topic Re: JOKES TIME TO LAUGH in Community Chat

JOKES TIME TO LAUGH

Lindsays Grandma — Tue, 09 Jun 2020 04:27:05 GMT

1. Whatever you look like, marry a man your own age - as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.

2. Three elderly ladies are discussing their mental health. The first lady says, "Today I was at the top of the stairs, and I couldn't remember if I had just gone up or was I about to go down."

3. Teacher: Can you tell me the most common word students use daily?

Student: Can't sir!

Teacher: Brilliant! Absolutely right!

4. 1st son: Degree in Economics

2nd son: MBA

3rd son: PhD

4th son: Thief

Neighbor: Why don't you throw the 4th son out of your house?

Father: He is the only one earning money. The rest are

unemployed.

5. A SIGN OF THE TIMES:

Daddy, since you lost your job and mommy is supporting us, should I give my Father's Day card to her?

6. I keep a nude painting of myself in my living room. Laugh if you want, but it sure keeps company from dropping by.

7. I always go the extra mile. Usually because I'm lost.

8. A man in a restaurant said to a stranger sitting at the next table: "Do realize that you are reading your newspaper upside down?" "Of course I realize it, do you think it's easy?"

9. People don't always post on my Facebook Wall but when they do, they wish me a Happy Birthday and then ignore me for another year.

10. If you are grouchy, irritable, annoying, or just plain mean, there will be a $15 charge for putting up with you.

11. "Darn, another rerun on the Food Channel."

"That's the microwave, Bob."

12. Three horrible facts:

1. Today is not Friday.

2. Tomorrow is not Friday.

3. Even the day after tomorrow is not Friday.

To Be Continued

Re: JOKES TIME TO LAUGH

DbinMD — Tue, 09 Jun 2020 10:47:33 GMT

@Lindsays Grandma

I love these, esp, #9, as today is my Birthday.. and it is true for some friends. the others are quite funny too!

Re: JOKES TIME TO LAUGH

godi — Tue, 09 Jun 2020 10:53:06 GMT

The first two are hysterical! 🤣☕️❤️

Re: JOKES TIME TO LAUGH

godi — Tue, 09 Jun 2020 10:53:51 GMT

@DbinMD Happy Birthday! 🎂

Re: JOKES TIME TO LAUGH

DbinMD — Tue, 09 Jun 2020 10:55:43 GMT

@godi

Thank you.. I guess I can say that he still loves me, cause I'm 64.

Re: JOKES TIME TO LAUGH

twinny70 — Tue, 09 Jun 2020 18:07:05 GMT

DbinMD, happy 64th birthday & many more. I hope that you have a great day and can eat a big piece of 🎂🎂🎂for me.

Re: JOKES TIME TO LAUGH

Lindsays Grandma — Wed, 10 Jun 2020 03:16:34 GMT

@DbinMD wrote:
@Lindsays Grandma

I love these, esp, #9, as today is my Birthday.. and it is true for some friends. the others are quite funny too!

@DbinMD Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday Dear DbinMD, Happy Birthday to you, and many more.

Re: JOKES TIME TO LAUGH

DbinMD — Wed, 10 Jun 2020 10:42:39 GMT

@Lindsays Grandma

Thank you so much for the Birthday wishes. I had found out on Sunday that my daughter, who lives in Indiana, was coming to surprise me for my Birthday. We had a wonderful day. We went out for lunch and we had steamed crabs. Yum, they were so good. We drove around and talked and had so much fun, really catching up. But in my true daughters form, when she was getting ready to leave, she couldn't find her keys. She called some locksmiths an couldn't find anyone to come. My husband helped her, and we finally got her car open, and guess what? The keys weren't in there, she finally found them in our 1st floor bathroom. This is why I said, in my daughters form, something always happens. LOL. When I got home my son had sent me beautiful flowers, they are so pretty. And on Saturday, I am leaving for a trip to Phoenix, Las Vegas, and then finishing up in Laguna Beach. So, I had a wonderful Birthday.

Re: JOKES TIME TO LAUGH

DbinMD — Wed, 10 Jun 2020 10:43:39 GMT

@twinny70

Thank you so much.

Re: JOKES TIME TO LAUGH

DbinMD — Wed, 10 Jun 2020 10:44:43 GMT

@Daisy Sunflower

Thank you..

Re: JOKES TIME TO LAUGH

Lindsays Grandma — Thu, 11 Jun 2020 01:54:33 GMT

@DbinMD Oh my, your daughter sounds just like mine. She never knows where her keys are. Whenever we're ready to leave the house she can't find her keys, when we're leaving a store, same thing, she starts hunting for the darn keys, it drives me crazy. Anyway I am so glad you had such a wonderful birthday.

You mentioned a trip to Phoenix, where do you live, I live in Mesa after moving from CA after 40 years there, originally from NY. I love Laguna Beach and Las Vegas is always a fun place to visit. How wonderful that your son sent you flowers, sounds like you have two thoughtful, loving children.

Re: JOKES TIME TO LAUGH

SandySparkles — Thu, 11 Jun 2020 05:52:23 GMT

@Lindsays Grandma I needed a good laugh, and number 6 DELIVERED!😂🤣🤣🤣🤣. Whew. I must thank you for that one.🤣😂😂

~~~All we need is LOVE💖

Re: JOKES TIME TO LAUGH

AnjalenaQVC — Thu, 11 Jun 2020 08:58:31 GMT

This post has been removed by QVC because it includes personal information.