topic Re: Kids Present At Siblings Birth. in Community Chat

Kids Present At Siblings Birth.

CrazyKittyLvr2 — Wed, 04 Mar 2020 19:05:59 GMT

I saw an article this am that Susan Sarandon's daughter, Eva Amurri, is due to have her 3rd child. However, she and her husband are divorcing and she doesn't want him present for the birth. Home birth with mid-wives. She said her girlfriends will be present as will her 5 yr. old daughter and 3 yr. old son. She wants them to see the miracle of birth. Okey, dokey.

Now, I don't know if she means just in the room or at the business end actually watching. Either way, I think 3 and 5 is way too young. It's not like it's the family dog having puppies.

My DD is 50 and when she was in nursery school one of her little classmates was picked up early.....to go home and watch her Mom have her baby sister or brother. The parents were.........unique.

Thoughts?

Re: Kids Present At Siblings Birth.

50Mickey — Wed, 04 Mar 2020 19:10:12 GMT

That would be a no for me.

Re: Kids Present At Siblings Birth.

Mz iMac — Wed, 04 Mar 2020 19:14:04 GMT

I personally see nothing wrong w/it. My children learned at an early age that "the stork" did not drop them down a chimny or dropped them on the doorstep.

Re: Kids Present At Siblings Birth.

Cakers3 — Wed, 04 Mar 2020 19:17:13 GMT

Puppies come out the same way as human babies-just an fyi. LOL

Whatever is comfortable for this family unit is fine.

Re: Kids Present At Siblings Birth.

millieshops — Wed, 04 Mar 2020 19:19:24 GMT

I see no reason children that young should be present for their sibling's birth. Too much chance they will see their mother in pain, too much chance they will manage to get in the way, and little chance they will understand what is going on unless someone else in the room is explaining - and fully understands what they are seeing themselves AND knows how to explain it to one so young!

To relate this idea to yesterday's thread pushing the idea Archie should be taken to England for his parents' trip, I feel this is all about some adults acting poorly.

Re: Kids Present At Siblings Birth.

beckyb1012 — Wed, 04 Mar 2020 19:19:34 GMT

I do not see a problem with it at all.

Re: Kids Present At Siblings Birth.

bikerbabe — Wed, 04 Mar 2020 19:19:37 GMT

It’s been fairly common among the 20-30 somethings that I know. I think it’s nice. 💕

Re: Kids Present At Siblings Birth.

suzyQ3 — Wed, 04 Mar 2020 19:21:17 GMT

I don't see anything wrong with the concept, but I do wonder about a couple things.

I hope that they are prepared for any contingency regarding complications that would be very frightening for the little ones.

Also, having witnessed the birth of my grandson, I can say that little ones, even knowing about childbirth, could be very upset by the reality of it.

If I were she, I would have videos in which you could filter out any scary parts.

Re: Kids Present At Siblings Birth.

tansy — Wed, 04 Mar 2020 19:23:33 GMT

My DIL had her then 5 yo daughter present when she was delivering her son. There was a designated family member to keep an eye out for her and to whisk her away if need be. She wasn't at the "business end" though. I would not have been comfortable with that for myself.

Re: Kids Present At Siblings Birth.

Puppy Lips — Wed, 04 Mar 2020 19:27:16 GMT

Oh heck NO. They are way too young for that in my opinion. If she is having a home birth, chances are no epidural either. Natural childbirth is painful (for most women). I would think young kids would get quite upset seeing "mommy" in pain and seeing the afterbirth and all the blood. I think it would be traumatizing, to say the least.

Dogs, on the other hand, bless their wonderful hearts, do not scream in pain during puppy birth (that I know of anyway).

Re: Kids Present At Siblings Birth.

tends2dogs — Wed, 04 Mar 2020 19:31:15 GMT

I do not know the reasons the parents are divorcing, but what a shame the husband can't be there for the other children. I assume he will be a part of this new child's life and it may just be a point of reconciliation if not just a happy family moment of time. Afterall, they must have still gotten along nine months ago......just saying.....

Unless of course he is a molester or ax murderer .

Re: Kids Present At Siblings Birth.

NicksmomESQ — Wed, 04 Mar 2020 19:33:49 GMT

No way.Never!!

Re: Kids Present At Siblings Birth.

sidsmom — Wed, 04 Mar 2020 19:43:04 GMT

Don't see anything wrong with it nor will I judge anyone

who make this decision for their family.

At the end of the day, having Mommy & Daddy go through

a divorce will be much, much, much more traumatic

than seeing your little brother/sister being born.

Re: Kids Present At Siblings Birth.

CrazyKittyLvr2 — Wed, 04 Mar 2020 19:46:07 GMT

I realize I'm most likely in the minority but I don't view it as a spectator sport. Imy personal feeling is if they weren't at the conception I don't want them at the birth.

I loved my Mother to death, however, she had a black belt in worrying. There is no way I would have had her there.

Re: Kids Present At Siblings Birth.

chrystaltree — Wed, 04 Mar 2020 19:48:47 GMT

They are much to young. I was 23 when I had my first child and I was too young to be exposed to childbirth....LOL

Re: Kids Present At Siblings Birth.

Porcelain — Thu, 05 Mar 2020 00:24:14 GMT

I think hearing their mom shrieking and seeing blood and etc would be very traumatic for children that young. They would not have the context to understand that it was all natural and that everything would be okay. And that's leaving out potential complications.

Have them play at a friend's or relative's house for a day or two and then let them meet their sib after he or she is out and free and clear and cleaned up. Birth is miraculous for adults because we understand it.

Edited to add: I don't think it's morally wrong. I just don't think it's the best idea. When I was a child I misunderstood a lot about what was going on around me. You never know what mistaken idea a child is going to come up with to explain something, and you'll never even hear about it until they're in their 20s.

Re: Kids Present At Siblings Birth.

Kachina624 — Wed, 04 Mar 2020 19:58:28 GMT

@Puppy Lips wrote:
Oh heck NO. They are way too young for that in my opinion. If she is having a home birth, chances are no epidural either. Natural childbirth is painful (for most women). I would think young kids would get quite upset seeing "mommy" in pain and seeing the afterbirth and all the blood. I think it would be traumatizing, to say the least.

Dogs, on the other hand, bless their wonderful hearts, do not scream in pain during puppy birth (that I know of anyway).

I agree with @Puppy Lips and couldn't have said it better. I think it would be a horrible, scary thing for a child to see and hear. If your child views a birth, you may never become a grandparent.

Re: Kids Present At Siblings Birth.

chickenbutt — Wed, 04 Mar 2020 19:58:22 GMT

While I recognize that it's not for me to say, my opinion is that they are a bit too young for that. Hopefully, it goes well but I can't even imagine what kidlets of that young age will take away from it. They could be scarred, for all I know.

Re: Kids Present At Siblings Birth.

grandma r — Wed, 04 Mar 2020 20:03:28 GMT

@CrazyKittyLvr2 IMO, the Mom and Dad are sharing a miracle. Other than medical personnel, no one else needs to be in the delivery room. The siblings can visit in the room later on.

Re: Kids Present At Siblings Birth.

noodleann — Wed, 04 Mar 2020 20:06:29 GMT

Oh. I thought this would have to do with Petunia seeing her mother have a litter of kittens. Glad she's being spared this trauma.