topic Re: 95th Birthday Invite in Community Chat

95th Birthday Invite

coffee drinker — Tue, 28 Jan 2020 01:49:50 GMT

DH & I have been invited to his aunt's 95th birthday. The invitation says "no gifts", and I would like to honor that request, but I don't think DH would agree with me. I feel a little something would be nice, but don't have a clue. Aunt is in a convalescent home and really has no need for money. Any suggestions that would be appropriate and not over the top.

Re: 95th Birthday Invite

kitcat51 — Tue, 28 Jan 2020 01:53:40 GMT

Show respect by honoring the request...no gift.

Re: 95th Birthday Invite

blackhole99 — Tue, 28 Jan 2020 01:54:28 GMT

Maybe you could give a donation to her nursing home in her name.

Re: 95th Birthday Invite

GCR18 — Tue, 28 Jan 2020 01:57:26 GMT

I agree, don't bring a gift to the party. Maybe the week before, drop in on her at the home and visit. Does she have a sweet tooth, favorite tea, hobby, bath wash? I'd go along those lines.

Re: 95th Birthday Invite

mspatmac — Tue, 28 Jan 2020 01:58:57 GMT

First thing that came to mind was a pretty Luminera candle maybe with a candle ring. The 3in ones don't take up much room. The new ones have your choice of timers so it could go on for a few hrs for her to enjoy then auto off. No muss no fuss and as little as 4 hrs on,

Re: 95th Birthday Invite

esmerelda — Tue, 28 Jan 2020 02:04:15 GMT

@coffee drinker You want to honor her wish for no gifts...but you're thinking about what gift would be nice?

Why not ask your DH if he is on board with honoring the "no gifts" request before you starts shopping. He mght surprise you.

And then what will you do?

Re: 95th Birthday Invite

1Snickers — Tue, 28 Jan 2020 02:06:02 GMT

If you have some photographs of her and family that you could put in a small frame or book it would be meaningful and not actually a bought gift.

Re: 95th Birthday Invite

alicedee — Tue, 28 Jan 2020 02:18:23 GMT

A room in a convalescent home is usually tiny....and often shared with another person. I would definitely NOT do a gift...she won't have space, and stuff will just end up going home with relatives.

Definitely a nice card with a note inside that you will make arrangements to either pick her up and take her out to lunch in a week or two....or if she can't go out, find out what she can eat and bring lunch in to have with her there. Your time and visit will be a wonderful gift!

Re: 95th Birthday Invite

Spacrazy — Tue, 28 Jan 2020 02:07:46 GMT

I was taught never to go “empty-handed” but this one is difficult and also such a blessed occasion.

Are y’all close? Maybe a framed photo of a special moment in time together. A beautiful card with a handwritten poem or message. And, there’s always fresh floral offerings even a bud vase. I have a favorite that had been my mother’s that was a small music box.

Good luck.

Re: 95th Birthday Invite

threecees — Tue, 28 Jan 2020 02:10:45 GMT

A beautiful card with a small teddy bear?

A cupcake with sprinkles, a single rose? Just some simple ideas.

Re: 95th Birthday Invite

Carmie — Tue, 28 Jan 2020 02:20:07 GMT

From experience I know that you have to pay to get your hair and nails done. If you are on Medicaid, one hair wash and style a month is covered.

Check with the convalescent home to see if they charge for these beauty treatments, if so, you can prepay for her to get her hair and nails done.

Re: 95th Birthday Invite

AuntG — Tue, 28 Jan 2020 02:22:03 GMT

Take a nice card but honor her wishes for NO GIFTS.

Re: 95th Birthday Invite

itsmetoo — Tue, 28 Jan 2020 02:27:02 GMT

@Carmie wrote:
From experience I know that you have to pay to get your hair and nails done. If you are on Medicaid, one hair wash and style a month is covered.

Check with the convalescent home to see if they charge for these beauty treatments, if so, you can prepay for her to get her hair and nails done.

@Carmie

I think that is a wonderful idea and very thoughtful. One hair wash a month isn't very much so I'm sure it would be much appreciated.

Re: 95th Birthday Invite

Curlstotame — Tue, 28 Jan 2020 02:27:39 GMT

@coffee drinker wrote:
DH & I have been invited to his aunt's 95th birthday. The invitation says "no gifts", and I would like to honor that request, but I don't think DH would agree with me. I feel a little something would be nice, but don't have a clue. Aunt is in a convalescent home and really has no need for money. Any suggestions that would be appropriate and not over the top.

Well, I'm guessing flowers and/or chocolates might be popular with a few other guests invited to the party. So, how about a book, a Candle Impression for her room, a donation in her name to a favorite charity. Does she have a favorite lotion? I know at 95, I'm am still going to want my lipstick and facial cream!!! A friend of mine had a tree planted in my mother's name when she turned 90. This is especially nice if your aunt had an interest in gardening. If you should have a picture of her, or her family, how about putting it in a lovely new frame for her to display. My mother's convelascent home had an ice cream shop and we were able to put money in her account for her daily ice cream treat. If these ideas don't help you someone else will come up with a perfect idea. Enjoy the birthday party. Your husband's aunt will!! It's the gift of family coming to see and celebrate her!

Re: 95th Birthday Invite

jannabelle1 — Tue, 28 Jan 2020 02:36:22 GMT

Seriously? No gifts for a 95 year old means just that. A nice card and some visits to her would probably be appreciated, but please listen to their request for "no gifts". I doubt she needs a candle or talcum powder or photos. I speak from experience with my own mother - just honor the family's request. Join in the celebration and give her some attention - that would probably be most appreciated.

Re: 95th Birthday Invite

K9buddy — Tue, 28 Jan 2020 02:35:18 GMT

A box of chocolates that she can share with the staff at the nursing home. They always appreciate it.

Re: 95th Birthday Invite

RollTide2008 — Tue, 28 Jan 2020 02:39:57 GMT

How about a gift for her caregivers in her honor? Muffins, a pizza lunch, a basket of assorted packaged snacks and bottled drinks, something like that?

Re: 95th Birthday Invite

Drythe — Tue, 28 Jan 2020 02:43:29 GMT

@coffee drinker

Nursing homes often have staff education funds, or staff assistance funds, a small donation in her name might be an option.

Re: 95th Birthday Invite

DiAnne — Tue, 28 Jan 2020 02:56:06 GMT

@Carmie wrote:
From experience I know that you have to pay to get your hair and nails done. If you are on Medicaid, one hair wash and style a month is covered.

Check with the convalescent home to see if they charge for these beauty treatments, if so, you can prepay for her to get her hair and nails done.

@Carmie

That is a great suggestion. Have to remember that one.

Re: 95th Birthday Invite

Anonymous032819 — Tue, 28 Jan 2020 02:59:48 GMT

@K9buddy wrote:
A box of chocolates that she can share with the staff at the nursing home. They always appreciate it.

Or the staff can "help themselves" with a box of chocolates.