topic Re: What decision would you make? in Community Chat

What decision would you make?

Laura14 — Fri, 10 Jan 2020 17:36:01 GMT

I know I have come to the right place for people with an opinion. A lot of you have been godsends with your points of view in the past so I am coming back to the well.

Longtime job probably coming to an end in March

Already have credentials and licensure for new career path which is primarily minimum wage and won't go much above it

Probably have ability to start new career locally and remain around small family circle and cheaper living situation but in a high rent area that will force me out once my family is gone

Or I can move cross country to a somewhat familiar small town and start over without any help financially or otherwise

Door #1: Would you stick close to current home and try and make it work as long as you could with family and finances

Door #2: Would you take the leap and completely start over somewhere else all by yourself to set up the rest of your own life before you get older and the area gets more expensive?

What say you and your life experiences?

Re: What decision would you make?

cindyNC — Fri, 10 Jan 2020 17:43:17 GMT

I think it depends on how much you love living where you are now. I separated, moved back to my hometown for a year and then moved south to a locale where I knew nobody.

I'm 65 now. I'm glad I made the move away as it was better for me financially. But my office closed and everyone I worked with transfered away or live out of state. But I don't see where I am now as permanent either.

How close are you to the relatives where you live now? How often could you afford to go back? Do you like the weather there and is the healthcare good? How soon do you want to decide?

Good luck with your decision - it's such an individual choice!

Re: What decision would you make?

Preds — Fri, 10 Jan 2020 17:46:14 GMT

At one time I would have chosen #2. I didn't and regretted it for a while. DD chose #2. She loved the new job, but was lonely. She made lifelong friends there, but she came back closer to home. She would also move tomorrow if she found the right opportunities for her and SIL.

That's a decission only you can decide because it is your life. Being away can be very exciting at first, but very lonely, too. No connections are harder for some than it is for others.

Re: What decision would you make?

phoenixbrd — Fri, 10 Jan 2020 17:47:11 GMT

My first concern would be the ability to support yourself. Will the license and certificate be honored in another state. Write a list of pros and cons for your choices. Only you know your your priorities. With the right mind set you will be successful in any situation. Wishing you the best.

Re: What decision would you make?

bikerbabe — Fri, 10 Jan 2020 17:47:50 GMT

Do you love where you live or are you just there because of family? Is your family a positive influence in your life or do they cause more stress? Where can you be better off financially long term in your new career?
It sounds like you’re hinting that the long-term is probably better in this other town but you are scared to make the leap.

Re: What decision would you make?

Porcelain — Fri, 10 Jan 2020 17:49:41 GMT

I always got an opinion! lol Thanks for giving me the opportunity to offer one. @Laura14

Are you interested in / is there the possibility of doing something similiar to your current job at a different employer in your current town? I'd be getting my resume out to similar local companies that have a need for similar duties to the ones you're doing now.

Not sure I would put my future in a job that can only ever pay minimum wage, as a full time job. Unless the tips were super good! Now as a stopgap measure, sure. In those cases, you gotta do what you gotta do for a while.

I wouldn't move unless circumstances or an unmissable specific, concrete, in-the-hand opportunity forced it.

Re: What decision would you make?

MandyG06 — Fri, 10 Jan 2020 17:51:51 GMT

go with YOUR gut instinct. you can get a zillion answers from us, but it's only yours that matter go get it, girlfriend! whatever you want to do, you'll be great at

Re: What decision would you make?

Laura14 — Fri, 10 Jan 2020 17:55:02 GMT

@cindyNC My family is actually around the corner and down the street but I don't see them much because they have kids. Both have mentioned moving away in the next few years as the kids get older but it would still be around that general part of the country.

It's really my mother who does come up from Florida every month and it does weigh on me that she is older now and I feel like I am walking out on her and won't see much of her before the inevitable happens although she's fine and travels all over the world at present with her husband.

Re: What decision would you make?

Peaches McPhee — Fri, 10 Jan 2020 17:57:02 GMT

How old are you? How close to full retirement age?

Do you know how long until your family is gone? (Are they graduating from school, for example?)

Going by what I know so far, I'd stay put.

Re: What decision would you make?

occasionalrain — Fri, 10 Jan 2020 17:57:06 GMT

Option #2. As long as you remain where you are, you will see yourself in terms of your family, influenced by how they see you. It's a comfort zone. You need to move away, be on your own.

Re: What decision would you make?

alicedee — Fri, 10 Jan 2020 17:57:37 GMT

I don't know how old you are, but for myself as I get older I want to be by family...it's important to me to have that support system.

If you move to a cheaper area, you may eat up the savings by taking trips "home."

if living expenses will be considerably cheaper in the other place...,and you can earn more money there..,,then it might make sense to go for it if you have a lot of working years left.

Good luck with your decision.

Re: What decision would you make?

geezerette — Fri, 10 Jan 2020 17:57:44 GMT

For me, it would depend on so many other details that you haven't listed here. What may concern me might not bother you at all.

In the end, it's all about you--your personality, your desires, your needs, your abilities.

I know that doesn't really help much at all.🤗

Re: What decision would you make?

Laura14 — Fri, 10 Jan 2020 17:59:26 GMT

@bikerbabe wrote:
Do you love where you live or are you just there because of family? Is your family a positive influence in your life or do they cause more stress? Where can you be better off financially long term in your new career?
It sounds like you’re hinting that the long-term is probably better in this other town but you are scared to make the leap.

You are so on every point @bikerbabe . I moved here to be close to family 18 years ago but I hate it. I've not lived in the other area of the country but it's closer to my childhood state in terms of weather (snow belt) and I've visited many times and always enjoyed but I know no one and have obviously not gone through a winter like that in a while.

My family stresses me out like you can not believe and yes I think long term I want to make the move but if the other side isn't greener I am kind of out of options at this point aka stuck where I am.

For those of you asking about the license, I can get one in the new state and it's a national certification. It's a stable career choice just low paying and more opportunity for it in the smaller town than locally here but doable both places I am sure and anywhere else I could potentially afford to be.

Re: What decision would you make?

geezerette — Fri, 10 Jan 2020 18:02:28 GMT

@Laura14 wrote:
@bikerbabe wrote:
Do you love where you live or are you just there because of family? Is your family a positive influence in your life or do they cause more stress? Where can you be better off financially long term in your new career?
It sounds like you’re hinting that the long-term is probably better in this other town but you are scared to make the leap.
You are so on every point @bikerbabe . I moved here to be close to family 18 years ago but I hate it. I've not lived in the other area of the country but it's closer to my childhood state in terms of weather (snow belt) and I've visited many times and always enjoyed but I know no one and have obviously not gone through a winter like that in a while.

My family stresses me out like you can not believe and yes I think long term I want to make the move but if the other side isn't greener I am kind of out of options at this point aka stuck where I am.

For those of you asking about the license, I can get one in the new state and it's a national certification. It's a stable career choice just low paying and more opportunity for it in the smaller town than locally here but doable both places I am sure and anywhere else I could potentially afford to be.

@Laura14

If you look at your post, I think you already have an idea of what you'd like to do. 😉

Re: What decision would you make?

Mindy D — Fri, 10 Jan 2020 18:04:25 GMT

@Laura14 wrote:
I know I have come to the right place for people with an opinion. A lot of you have been godsends with your points of view in the past so I am coming back to the well.

Longtime job probably coming to an end in March

Already have credentials and licensure for new career path which is primarily minimum wage and won't go much above it

Probably have ability to start new career locally and remain around small family circle and cheaper living situation but in a high rent area that will force me out once my family is gone

Or I can move cross country to a somewhat familiar small town and start over without any help financially or otherwise

Door #1: Would you stick close to current home and try and make it work as long as you could with family and finances

OR

Door #2: Would you take the leap and completely start over somewhere else all by yourself to set up the rest of your own life before you get older and the area gets more expensive?

What say you and your life experiences?

What are the costs involved in the small town option? Are rents rising there? How is the availability of jobs in your field there? Are there state income taxes there? How far are you from good healthcare? What Medicare options are available there and in your current place ( for when you retire)? Have you looked in the area surrounding where you are now to determine rents, costs, medical care, insurance. What kind of place would you be happy living in? An apartment?

How is the climate in each place? What about cost of electric bill?

What services are available in each place place if you should become disabled in the future?

If it were me, after I made a chart and researched costs in depth, I’d pick where affordability is best.

If i wasnt investigating any deeper deeper than you have already stated, I’d determine how many years I could optimize the current cheap living arrangement. If I could count on five or more years I’d stay put and get in some experience in my new field and afford my place to live. Good luck.

Re: What decision would you make?

Laura14 — Fri, 10 Jan 2020 18:05:03 GMT

Thanks @MandyG06 !!

@PorcelainYou are very welcome! LOL I have to get out of my industry because they keep flipping my place of employment and I am kind of done with being sold off and in this position every few years or so. I'm getting way too old for it. I want some security in my life even if it is with a lesser paying job. At this point, job security matters more with no financial partner or kids to take care of me when I am in need.

Re: What decision would you make?

Laura14 — Fri, 10 Jan 2020 18:07:34 GMT

@Peaches McPheeMy family is probably making their own moves in the next 5 years or so when their kids get into college. If my mother follows her parents lifespan, she may or may not be here at that time whch would automatically force me out since she and I have a mutually beneficial living arrangement going on right now.

I am a ways away from retirement as I am in my late 40s going into 50s.

Re: What decision would you make?

Laura14 — Fri, 10 Jan 2020 18:09:00 GMT

@geezerette It does. I've been alone most of my life and my family around me is for their comfort most of the time not mine although it's been helpful in terms of finances and the rare event I need someone to help me.

Re: What decision would you make?

Laura14 — Fri, 10 Jan 2020 18:13:37 GMT

@Mindy D Done it all and I can not afford to live where I currently am. It works because of an arrangement with my mother and I. Nor do I care for the state or region which has no safeguards for me as a single woman at all until I hit Medicare age.

The small town is booming and is affordable via apartment probably as paycheck to paycheck right now and definitely affordable if I like it to buy a small home and lower the "rent" even more that way.

They are literally building luxury homes as we type so I could be outpaced there in the next several years since a lot of people have discovered it as well.

Re: What decision would you make?

Porcelain — Fri, 10 Jan 2020 18:15:26 GMT

@Laura14, When it comes to finances, if you need family assistance, they can always wire you the money, send you a check, Western Union it, PayPal... It's not like you'll never see or talk to them again if you move.