topic Re: Retired ladies - so, how is it? Will I adjust OK? in Community Chat

Retired ladies - so, how is it? Will I adjust OK?

tarsmom — Sun, 04 Aug 2019 19:45:21 GMT

I have just over a year to go before retiring. It is SOOOO hard to get up at 6 every day and work 9 hours 5 days. I'm thinking it's because I'm older now (my DH and I laugh "I'm not 34, I'm not 44, I'm not 54, in two months I'll be 64!!!" I guess my mind thinks I'm about 40ish and yet here I am, working with so many young people around me all day long.

It's a very odd place to be right now. I'm not a grandma, I'm not a millenial, I don't know what I am!

Most of my friends are retired, DH and I will go together next year (we're two months apart in age).

Our only son lives out of state and is not married (yet).

I spent a lot of years hanging out with my mom, shopping, dining out for lunch, doing her hair, etc. etc. and it's funny how life changes (she's been gone 7+ years).

I'm trying to figure out what's next - so please give me your routines and have you moved? (We'll be doing that I believe because I'm not staying in MI winters!).

Re: Retired ladies - so, how is it? Will I adjust OK?

CLHS68 — Sun, 04 Aug 2019 19:58:16 GMT

Retirement is not what it is cracked up to be. Wish I could still work.

Re: Retired ladies - so, how is it? Will I adjust OK?

Mz iMac — Sun, 04 Aug 2019 19:59:33 GMT

I retired at age 50.......

I have no routine......

I travel a lot on a whim, mostly international....

No longer take 1 week cruises. Now I go on 2+ weeks type cruises.....

I enjoy gambling. I am surrounded by casinos as I live in a tri-state casino resort area.

Paramour is 10 yrs younger than me & still works. Sometimes he joins me on my "whims" sometimes he doesn't. On those "whims" I grab a grandchild or some girlfrinds (depends on the "whim").

"Each day above ground is a good day" is my motto. I live each day to its fullest. If that means staying in my PJs all day, ordering out, playing on the computer, binge watching movies and/or tv series so be it!

Age 69

Re: Retired ladies - so, how is it? Will I adjust OK?

Puppy Lips — Sun, 04 Aug 2019 20:00:45 GMT

I am aways off from retirement, so I can not comment there. We have been in central FL for 12 years now. This summer has been really brutal. Personally, being from up north, I love cold weather. If you have any notion of moving to FL, I would spend some time here in the summer before you make your decision. Florida has a lot to offer and many people love it. If I had my way though, we would not be here, mostly due to the weather.

Re: Retired ladies - so, how is it? Will I adjust OK?

Zaimee — Sun, 04 Aug 2019 20:05:31 GMT

I am there. Retired from 44 years of teaching at 66 in June. Glad I am not driving 35 miles and back each day. Right now, I am “off for the summer” as I have been every year. Watching Daytime TV, reading these forums. I know it will it will hit me when everyone goes back to school in 2 weeks. Need a purpose. I can always volunteer at my school. I will be interested in seeing your replies.

Re: Retired ladies - so, how is it? Will I adjust OK?

Lilysmom — Sun, 04 Aug 2019 20:08:16 GMT

@tarsmom , congratulations on your upcoming retirement. I can say without reservation that this is the best time of my life.

If you have a move upcoming, that will keep you occupied for a good while especially if you have property to sell. We built a new retirement home and enjoy living lakeside.

I had a very very busy career so I was concerned about being home. I can easily say I am still very busy. I sit on some community organizations, one of which is a very active committee. At times I am busier than I want to be but it will have an ending in a year or so.

Wiat until you get settled in your new home to start a new routine. Not much sense starting something only to leave it mid stream.

Sine you are both retiring at the same time, you will both be experiencing the upheaval at the same time. I retired first and was able to ease into it at my own pace.

My best wishes to you and DH. LM

Re: Retired ladies - so, how is it? Will I adjust OK?

Mom2Dogs — Sun, 04 Aug 2019 20:09:48 GMT

@tarsmom these threads always interest me....some people just love retirement others not so much. It's an adjustment.

I am 64 dh is late 70's....be both still work/self employed, although the pace is not what it once was we would be totally lost without our work.

We are both healthy, which we are more than grateful for, which makes it easier to continue to work, plus our business is making money and we don't want to walk away from a profitable business, not sure we could sell it to anyone....one day we might decide we're done and we will close up. If you asked us, I would say probably two more years, if possible.

No kids together, dh has 2 from a previous marriage. One lives close with two kids and 2 grandkids, the other one lives across the country. We are not overly close the grand kids...one is married and is very involved with her inlaws....and her mom's side is not a priority, although when invited to a family event, they do show up and seem to enjoy themselves.

We have made a life together without family..dh's family has all passed away, my siblings are scattered across the country and a couple of them I have no desire to see again...very difficult personalties.

My mom lived several hours from me but we visited often, she has been gone 20+years, still miss her and my dad....I mention kids and parents only because some people move close to their children and find it's not what they thought it was going be, the kids have their own lives and the parents are not happy living away from their old friends. Making friends as we age is very difficult.

I will be interested to hear the replies, I know there is no magic answer to the question.

Re: Retired ladies - so, how is it? Will I adjust OK?

Snowpuppy — Sun, 04 Aug 2019 20:15:36 GMT

I'm a ways from retirement but from time to time they offer early outs so I may be closer than I think 😉

I live Up North, moved here specifically to retire here. It's peaceful, property taxes are low as is the cost of living and best of all it's not restrictive. My pups are mindful, I have no HOA, people are far more laid back than the city. I can bike or walk my neighborhood. It's very small but on a paved road.

If it's a snowy day or a blizzard, I'll stay in and light a fire. I won't have that commute. I live within 5 miles of big water and Lake Michigan and GT Bay are a short jog.

Re: Retired ladies - so, how is it? Will I adjust OK?

Zaimee — Sun, 04 Aug 2019 20:16:13 GMT

Yes. South Florida summers are brutally hot and rainy. But, everything is air conditioned.

Re: Retired ladies - so, how is it? Will I adjust OK?

qualitygal — Sun, 04 Aug 2019 20:16:23 GMT

you get to call the shots on what, when and why you will be doing what you'll be doing. It's not set in cement.....................enjoy it. I sure do.

Re: Retired ladies - so, how is it? Will I adjust OK?

kaydee50 — Sun, 04 Aug 2019 20:18:40 GMT

Had my last job when I was 55 (now 69); DH retired at 57(now 73). Love, love, love retirement. We travel a lot; have moved twice. We have enough money and are healthy so far.

I miss nothing about working. DH misses the social aspect of it, not the daily grind. I volunteer with 2 knitting groups and belong to several museums within walking distance.

Don't know if you'll "adjust." That's up to you.

Re: Retired ladies - so, how is it? Will I adjust OK?

itsmagic — Sun, 04 Aug 2019 20:19:11 GMT

I love retirement! I guess I was ready to retire when I did because I felt like I had been let out of jail. I too got up by 6 am, left for work by 7 am and returned home at 6 pm five days a week. After I retired I would catch myself thinking I would need to get up early the next day for work only to remember that I didn’t. 😃. Now I do what I want when I want without having to ask permission from the boss! I don’t have to jam grocery shopping and house cleaning into every weekend - I do it on and off during the week when I feel like it. We did not move even though we have winters here. My grandchildren are in the area and I know I would miss them. We just plan a few warm weather getaways during the winter. You’ll be surprised how busy you become after retirement.

Re: Retired ladies - so, how is it? Will I adjust OK?

QVCkitty1 — Sun, 04 Aug 2019 20:20:46 GMT

@tarsmom wrote:
I have just over a year to go before retiring. It is SOOOO hard to get up at 6 every day and work 9 hours 5 days. I'm thinking it's because I'm older now (my DH and I laugh "I'm not 34, I'm not 44, I'm not 54, in two months I'll be 64!!!" I guess my mind thinks I'm about 40ish and yet here I am, working with so many young people around me all day long.

It's a very odd place to be right now. I'm not a grandma, I'm not a millenial, I don't know what I am!

Most of my friends are retired, DH and I will go together next year (we're two months apart in age).

Our only son lives out of state and is not married (yet).

I spent a lot of years hanging out with my mom, shopping, dining out for lunch, doing her hair, etc. etc. and it's funny how life changes (she's been gone 7+ years).

I'm trying to figure out what's next - so please give me your routines and have you moved? (We'll be doing that I believe because I'm not staying in MI winters!).

A good friend told me once that the first time I woke up to a snow storm and knew I could turn over and go back to sleep , I would truly appreciate retirement. I love the freedom, and yes, she was right about the snow. LOL.

Re: Retired ladies - so, how is it? Will I adjust OK?

IdahoGram — Sun, 04 Aug 2019 20:23:19 GMT

Speaking for myself of course! We moved out of state, I would not recommend doing this. Stay where your friends, familly, work friends, doctors, etc are. It's very difficult to make new friends at such an advanced age. We've been here 15 yrs and are still without real true friends. Just my experience for what it's worth.

Re: Retired ladies - so, how is it? Will I adjust OK?

Annabellethecat66 — Sun, 04 Aug 2019 20:23:22 GMT

I quit work when my first daughter was born. I worked for the first 7 years of being married (married at barely 19). Saved and lived only on his salary so didn't miss the money when I quit to be a stay at home mom.

My two married daughters are also stay at home mom's.

Anyway, I guess you could say I retired early. I know it's very different when one is busy raising a family versus retiring in your 60's.

You are (hopefully) in good health. If I were you, I'd make sure to meet up with friends as often as you can (even if they're still working, do it for dinner).

Do not let yourself get absorbed in ..... well...yourself and/or your husband (if married).

I think it's healthy for you to make sure you have something just for you....just for you.

My daughter has 4 children (ages 7 thru 17). She makes sure she does things that SHE enjoys. She has several crafts she takes classes in. She does Yoga and various other activities that takes her away from housework, etc.

She's about to turn 46 and her sister (1 week apart) 44. So I understand she's still young compared to a 60 something .... but you get the idea.

Please don't consider getting out with friends and girlfriends as frivolous and wasting time. Please!

So many people think if every day isn't spent cleaning or doing something 'productive' it's a crime.

Well, it's productive for you to take care of your own mental health. I think being happy with yourself is easier when you're around people who STILL value your ideas and friendship....females.

Just like if at work you had a group of females you'd talk to about it things, you still need that.

Also, my advice is to stay up on the news and (I believe) just as important things that are happening in your area. You'd be surprised at how many people and organizations need help from people like you.

Don't think you don't have anything to offer. I'm sure you do.

My mother used to say, "If you want to feel old...hang out with old people. If you want to stay young....hang out with young people".

Please come back and let us know how you are doing. You'll have ideas for everyone out here in QVC land who can help us all.

Take care...

Re: Retired ladies - so, how is it? Will I adjust OK?

Frau K — Sun, 04 Aug 2019 20:28:37 GMT

Hello,

I retired three and a half years ago at 55. I worked in our family business for about 30 years. I was kind of scared of not having enough to keep me busy after working about 12 hours a day. My DH, who is 10 years older than me still works three days a week. Our DD still lives at home.

I am keeping very busy with cooking most days. It’s a game to me to see how many meals I can get out of a twenty dollar bill. It’s amazing how well you can eat by not going to restaurants. I also walk several times a week with a group of friends. DH and I also travel quite a bit. Something we’ve put off all these years. I’m enjoying it very much. Oh, I also help my Mom quite a bit. She still lives alone but doesn’t drive anymore so that takes up a lot of time too.

Re: Retired ladies - so, how is it? Will I adjust OK?

tarsmom — Sun, 04 Aug 2019 20:31:30 GMT

@Puppy Lips wrote:
I am aways off from retirement, so I can not comment there. We have been in central FL for 12 years now. This summer has been really brutal. Personally, being from up north, I love cold weather. If you have any notion of moving to FL, I would spend some time here in the summer before you make your decision. Florida has a lot to offer and many people love it. If I had my way though, we would not be here, mostly due to the weather.

I'm curious - did a job bring you there? My son lived in Miami and my brother lives in Daytona. I know it's hot/humid in the summer because I spent two weeks there with a girlfriend years ago. Do you have family north? I find people live where they live because of family. I have no family here although I will miss my girlfriends. I am outgoing though and hopefully will make new friends - maybe volunteer, who knows? We are not going to FL because DH says no. Son is in NC but I posted about that a few months ago and it's too busy there. Maybe northern GA or SC. I just hate winter's gray skies for months on end.

Re: Retired ladies - so, how is it? Will I adjust OK?

texassunflower — Sun, 04 Aug 2019 20:32:31 GMT

I have had a hard time adjusting to retirement. I took early retirement from teaching to care for my mother. I left my classroom one day and never returned mid year. Mom had a stroke, then diagnosed with breast cancer three weeks later. A year and a half later, she suffered another stroke. I was home with her 4 and a half years. She passed away in June 2018. I retired at 52. I began subbing half days in September 2018. I work three days a week usually and that gives me some extra cash. Most of my friends still work and I find it lonely to be home all the time. I don't have a hobby, other than watching TV and reading. I am probably the only teacher alive ready for school to begin. I know I wouldn't feel this way if I taught full time.

Re: Retired ladies - so, how is it? Will I adjust OK?

Havarti — Sun, 04 Aug 2019 20:33:56 GMT

I really loved all but one of the jobs I had during my working years so I was not eager to retire. The company I worked for was disolved and poof...all the jobs were gone, too. I was not sure how I would do without the personal rewards working afforded me.

Well, I can say I am now soooooooo HAPPY! I love every aspect of retirement. It took a little while to adjust to the different pace of life, but I can honestly say this is the best phase of my life. I hope it is for you, too.

Re: Retired ladies - so, how is it? Will I adjust OK?

SilleeMee — Sun, 04 Aug 2019 20:58:53 GMT

I think these days people are lucky to be able to retire when they reach their mid-sixties. Many people can not afford to do that because of insufficient retirement funds and health insurance concerns. I had to go into early retirement at 47 because of disability. I'm 64 now and I would love to be able to still work. I would work until I could physically no longer do it. Going into early retirement for me nearly put me under the bridge. Cost me a fortune in health insurance and when you are under the age of 65 and disabled, there are very few financial breaks. I'm still feeling the financial burden. My medical bills took away much of my retirement savings. I've been living alone, paying for everything on my own for the past 35 years. For me retirement is not easy or a walk in the park.