topic Re: Why do posts go off the subject or turn mean? in Community Chat

Why do posts go off the subject or turn mean?

chiclet — Sat, 27 Oct 2018 11:28:57 GMT

It surprises me how someone can post and the responses that follow did not get the meaning of the original post and turn it into something else. Or responses are so hateful. It is like they can pick apart the topic and find something so negative to rage about. I saw one post about the decline of home shopping and then it became out the original poster being disrepectful about the older generation. I come on here to listen to different points of view and to get reviews and helpful information.

Re: Why do posts go off the subject or turn mean?

KingstonsMom — Sat, 27 Oct 2018 11:33:54 GMT

@chiclet

Some people are just like that. Always looking for or wanting to create an argument.

Re: Why do posts go off the subject or turn mean?

staciesmom — Sat, 27 Oct 2018 11:38:13 GMT

I wonder the same thing, but if you notice it's usually the same posters who are mean and snarky. I don't post very often due to the responses I'm sure to get. I think it's a problem in all forms of social media. Harry Slatkin just posted in a Facebook candle group that he was disappointed in the drama some people are causing. This is a group posting about candles! How sad that people seeking camaraderie and opinions about things get slammed and shamed.

Re: Why do posts go off the subject or turn mean?

GSPgirl — Sat, 27 Oct 2018 11:38:19 GMT

@chiclet wrote:
It surprises me how someone can post and the responses that follow did not get the meaning of the original post and turn it into something else. Or responses are so hateful. It is like they can pick apart the topic and find something so negative to rage about. I saw one post about the decline of home shopping and then it became out the original poster being disrepectful about the older generation. I come on here to listen to different points of view and to get reviews and helpful information.

This question had been asked since the beginning of these boards. It won’t stop. People have opinions.

Re: Why do posts go off the subject or turn mean?

Sweetbay magnolia — Sat, 27 Oct 2018 11:39:41 GMT

Words matter. It is easy for them to fall on deaf ears when spoken aloud, but in writing, intentions are sometimes misconstrued.

That's a beautiful thing about writing, too. Artists of the written word may have different interpretations in mind, or we simply see something we had not before, and it can be enlightening.

I'm with you, though. I avoid here, what I consider unnecessarily confrontational. That's what I come for, either!

Re: Why do posts go off the subject or turn mean?

Imaoldhippie — Sat, 27 Oct 2018 11:43:35 GMT

If you came here for different opinions that what you are reading. People are going to give their opinion as they should. Read the snarky, mean posts for just what they are, nothing, and move on.

Re: Why do posts go off the subject or turn mean?

CalminHeart — Sat, 27 Oct 2018 11:43:51 GMT

I've read a lot of posts on these forums that don't make sense and/or could be taken a number of ways. Ignore them. Why let an anonymous person's comment take up space in your brain.

Re: Why do posts go off the subject or turn mean?

KingstonsMom — Sat, 27 Oct 2018 11:53:12 GMT

@GSPgirl wrote:
@chiclet wrote:
It surprises me how someone can post and the responses that follow did not get the meaning of the original post and turn it into something else. Or responses are so hateful. It is like they can pick apart the topic and find something so negative to rage about. I saw one post about the decline of home shopping and then it became out the original poster being disrepectful about the older generation. I come on here to listen to different points of view and to get reviews and helpful information.
This question had been asked since the beginning of these boards. It won’t stop. People have opinions.

@GSPgirl

And most people can convey their opinions in a constructive, respectful way.

Others just can't.....or don't want to.

Re: Why do posts go off the subject or turn mean?

Ruby Laine — Sat, 27 Oct 2018 11:56:25 GMT

So true, @chiclet.

I have lunch sometimes with a group of women who have varied opinions on politics, religion, and many other issues. We’ve been friends for many years.

We express opinions without rancor or a holier-than-thou attitude. Sometimes one of us will ask a question or for advice. We don’t act like it’s a stupid question or use sarcasm. We try to be this way with everyone.

We respect each other. And yes, somehow we still manage to share a lot of laughter and have a lot of fun!

Re: Why do posts go off the subject or turn mean?

OKPrincess — Sat, 27 Oct 2018 11:58:22 GMT

@CalminHeart wrote:
I've read a lot of posts on these forums that don't make sense and/or could be taken a number of ways. Ignore them. Why let an anonymous person's comment take up space in your brain.

I really like your last sentence. Well said!!

Re: Why do posts go off the subject or turn mean?

chrystaltree — Sat, 27 Oct 2018 12:06:33 GMT

Well, mean is a relative term and here it usually means that the person didn't agree with what someone posted. Or someone posted something that wasn't sugary syrupy sweet. Years ago, posters would whine about feeling "threatened" when they read something they did not like. I think the best thing to do is skip over posts and threads that you don't like and avoid getting drawn into other people's arguments. Even if you think you are helping. And laugh it off when someone singles you out by name with something nasty or mean sprited. Just don't take the bait. I think the vast majority of posts are what you are looking for. Fun, informative, chatty.

Re: Why do posts go off the subject or turn mean?

TaylorBrown — Sat, 27 Oct 2018 12:10:17 GMT

Plain and simple, it's because people are people. You encounter these folks in everyday life, why would it be any different here?

Re: Why do posts go off the subject or turn mean?

AngelPuppy1 — Sat, 27 Oct 2018 12:14:49 GMT

I guess it's just life. Sometimes even the most simple things can be twisted around! I have made comments to family members or friends which I thought were very bland and then the next thing you know --- boom --- all heck breaks out. I'm like --- uh --- what just happened???? I think at times someone might not be having a great day to begin with or perhaps might not be feeling well, and then the smallest thing, causes them to over react or react in a negative way. But then again, there are some people who like to get a rise out of others for no apparent reason. Beats me.

Re: Why do posts go off the subject or turn mean?

matty liz — Sat, 27 Oct 2018 12:34:30 GMT

It has gotten worse. Most of the contributors are so thoughtful and helpful but more are not. Love all the info I get and we are so vast and diversafied that it is fun.

Re: Why do posts go off the subject or turn mean?

hayseed00 — Sat, 27 Oct 2018 13:00:57 GMT

I agree, I come here to learn, laugh, and interact with fellow shoppers !!!

Re: Why do posts go off the subject or turn mean?

MyShadowLove — Sat, 27 Oct 2018 13:03:49 GMT

It's kind of like in real life when you are talking to someone about something and they end up turning the whole conversation around and you suddenly realize that you don't even know what you are talking about anymore!...LOL

Re: Why do posts go off the subject or turn mean?

qualitygal — Sat, 27 Oct 2018 13:07:37 GMT

also, if your day isn't so great, you may respond in a more negative way, not to mention you may be more sensitive when you read something, if your day isn't going as planned.

Re: Why do posts go off the subject or turn mean?

jlkz — Sat, 27 Oct 2018 13:09:14 GMT

@KingstonsMom

The snarky ones who love to instigate arguments have nothing else to think about OR have significant things and can ignore them by concentrating on others’ opinions.

Their ceaseless negativity betrays them over time. Most of us get accustomed to their written behavior and skip over their posts.

Their anonymity gives them protection from being accountable.

Re: Why do posts go off the subject or turn mean?

JYWilliams — Sat, 27 Oct 2018 13:14:51 GMT

Jlkz I agree with your post. If you look at the comments on a lot of these posts it's usuallly the same handful of people that has a snarky remark no matter what the subject is.

Re: Why do posts go off the subject or turn mean?

jeanlake — Sat, 27 Oct 2018 14:05:29 GMT

Because humans, and not robots, are posting. In the future, it may be cool to have some decent robot friends and coworkers. Halfway kidding.

Best guess is many people do not start threads because they don't want to defend their post to the discontented. And that's what the mean girls & guys are... discontent.