topic Re: What Would You Do? in Community Chat

What Would You Do?

ciao_bella — Sun, 02 Sep 2018 13:38:22 GMT

By the end of this year, I will be retiring from teaching after 27+ years. I have not joined FB until just recently, thinking it may be a great way to keep in touch with friends and colleagues when I retire.

When I joined, a friend, who I have know for decades, asked to friend her, which I did. I haven't seen her in many years though we used to work together before I started teaching. We've always had a nice friendship.

Since accepting her as a friend, everyday I receive several political posts from her on my FB homepage and timeline. When I joined FB, my intention was to share pictures, events, memories, etc. to keep in touch with friends. All of my current friends know I'm not into political posts/agendas and don't want them posted on my FB. After seeing her posts these on my FB, I decided to message her with a very polite request to refrain from posting them on my FB. I told her that, although I respect everyone's choice in politics, I prefer not to have them posted on my FB. I added that all of my current friends are aware of this so that's why there are no other political posts on my FB. I thanked her for her understanding. She responded to my message with a Like 'thumbs up', so I thought everything was okay.

Everyday, since that response from her, I have been getting the same type of political posts on my FB timeline and homepage. I've taken the posts down each time I see them, but I'm not sure how I should handle this. Should I just continue to take them down and say nothing, say something to her again or something else?

Re: What Would You Do?

cherry — Sun, 02 Sep 2018 13:40:43 GMT

I would simply unfriend her. You asked her nicely not to do it. She has no respect for your wishes. There is always one isn't there?

Re: What Would You Do?

Goldengate8361 — Sun, 02 Sep 2018 13:43:08 GMT

Everybody has at least one crazy friend of the opposite political leanings who does this on Facebook. It’s no biggie. No one assumes it reflects on you. Really. It’s Facebook. Everybody knows how it works. I always see posts on mine (from largely friends I went to college and high school with) that that totally make me cringe. I laugh! And, that’s the right thing to do. Nobody takes Facebook seriously.

Re: What Would You Do?

Zhills — Sun, 02 Sep 2018 13:45:54 GMT

You don't have to unfriend her. You can "unfollow" her and she remains your friend but her posts do not show up in your feed. You can go to her page for any messages you want to see and/or anwser.

Re: What Would You Do?

willdob3 — Sun, 02 Sep 2018 13:46:23 GMT

@ciao_bella

Delete your FB account. Easy fix. The alternative is to deal with all sorts of things you don’t want to on a regular basis.

Re: What Would You Do?

Deree — Sun, 02 Sep 2018 13:50:11 GMT

I might be wrong but I think what you're seeing is your FB feed which is different from your own FB page. When you friend someone their posts on their own personal FB page may show up in your feed. So even though she acknowledged your request she is still posting on her own FB page what she wants to. The only solutions are either to unfriend her then maybe keep in touch with her via email or unfollow her as someone said.

Re: What Would You Do?

sidsmom — Sun, 02 Sep 2018 13:54:59 GMT

Asking a friend not to post something?

Ouch.

She’s probably thinking, ‘yeah, right.’

Easy fix on your part...without insulting your friends.

ETA: Knowing this information, I would immediately message her

back and apologize. Let her know you are new at this & wasn’t aware.

Re: What Would You Do?

The Odd One — Sun, 02 Sep 2018 13:54:26 GMT

All you have to do is UNFOLLOW her. You don't have to unfriend her.

Re: What Would You Do?

FrostyBabe1 — Sun, 02 Sep 2018 13:57:20 GMT

You can't control what other people decide to post on Facebook. That's their decision. What you're most likely seeing are posts that she decides to share either publicly or with her friends. Just unfollow her and you won't have to see them.

Re: What Would You Do?

chrystaltree — Sun, 02 Sep 2018 14:11:48 GMT

Just unfriend her but don't be surprise if that ends the real life friendship too. Everyone on FB experiences that but it doesn't bother most of us. FB is 90% junk so we read what interests and skip by what doesn't. You don't actually have to read every post on FB...lol You can be selective. There was a reason why you were so late to FB, it wasn't your thing. You don't understand it and I think you are giving it an importance that it doesn't deserve. Unfriend her, look at your privacy settings and stop taking it all so seriously. I've done what I can do to weed out the junk and trash but I still a myriad of stuff I don't want. I just don't care, FB doesn't force me to read things I don't want to read.

Re: What Would You Do?

GCR18 — Sun, 02 Sep 2018 14:24:10 GMT

I learned to navigate Facebook by spending some time on my page clicking through all the settings. You can control what you see by adjusting your settings. You can also setup how you want to view posts. You can rank your friends, so you always see Mary's posts first and Susan's last. That way you won't miss who you want to see.

Re: What Would You Do?

Sooner — Sun, 02 Sep 2018 14:24:50 GMT

I think it is time to stop and think about what the word "friend" means. Who is an acquaintance to you? Who are you real friends? There is a big difference.

This world is trying to "bully" all of us into being "fiends" with people who are acquaintances to us, and have no real meaning as "friends."

We all probably have lots of acquaintances, and have to stop and think how many are really friends in the true sense. After you retire, you find out the difference, and find out there are new friends and acquaintances out there who have more meaning in your life now.

Re: What Would You Do?

YorkieonmyPillow — Sun, 02 Sep 2018 14:26:42 GMT

You can adjust your settings so you are the only one who can post on your own wall.

Not sure if she is posting on your wall or you're following her.

Re: What Would You Do?

CelticCrafter — Sun, 02 Sep 2018 14:29:44 GMT

She isn't posting it to your page. Its something she has shared on her own timeline/newsfeed and because you're friends is the reason you are seeing it.

If you want to remain FB friends, just unfollow her, she won't know.

If you unfriend her, she won't know that either unless she notices that her friend count went down and does some investigating on her own.

Re: What Would You Do?

jackthebear — Sun, 02 Sep 2018 14:32:33 GMT

@ciao_bella wrote:
By the end of this year, I will be retiring from teaching after 27+ years. I have not joined FB until just recently, thinking it may be a great way to keep in touch with friends and colleagues when I retire.

When I joined, a friend, who I have know for decades, asked to friend her, which I did. I haven't seen her in many years though we used to work together before I started teaching. We've always had a nice friendship.

Since accepting her as a friend, everyday I receive several political posts from her on my FB homepage and timeline. When I joined FB, my intention was to share pictures, events, memories, etc. to keep in touch with friends. All of my current friends know I'm not into political posts/agendas and don't want them posted on my FB. After seeing her posts these on my FB, I decided to message her with a very polite request to refrain from posting them on my FB. I told her that, although I respect everyone's choice in politics, I prefer not to have them posted on my FB. I added that all of my current friends are aware of this so that's why there are no other political posts on my FB. I thanked her for her understanding. She responded to my message with a Like 'thumbs up', so I thought everything was okay.

Everyday, since that response from her, I have been getting the same type of political posts on my FB timeline and homepage. I've taken the posts down each time I see them, but I'm not sure how I should handle this. Should I just continue to take them down and say nothing, say something to her again or something else?

you can "unfollow" her so you will stay friends but won't see her nonsense, which I have done.

some of the sites that people post have options to hide them so you won't see the topics anymore, which you can see by mousing to the upper right

Re: What Would You Do?

JeanLouiseFinch — Sun, 02 Sep 2018 14:39:25 GMT

@ciao_bella wrote:
By the end of this year, I will be retiring from teaching after 27+ years. I have not joined FB until just recently, thinking it may be a great way to keep in touch with friends and colleagues when I retire.

When I joined, a friend, who I have know for decades, asked to friend her, which I did. I haven't seen her in many years though we used to work together before I started teaching. We've always had a nice friendship.

Since accepting her as a friend, everyday I receive several political posts from her on my FB homepage and timeline. When I joined FB, my intention was to share pictures, events, memories, etc. to keep in touch with friends. All of my current friends know I'm not into political posts/agendas and don't want them posted on my FB. After seeing her posts these on my FB, I decided to message her with a very polite request to refrain from posting them on my FB. I told her that, although I respect everyone's choice in politics, I prefer not to have them posted on my FB. I added that all of my current friends are aware of this so that's why there are no other political posts on my FB. I thanked her for her understanding. She responded to my message with a Like 'thumbs up', so I thought everything was okay.

Everyday, since that response from her, I have been getting the same type of political posts on my FB timeline and homepage. I've taken the posts down each time I see them, but I'm not sure how I should handle this. Should I just continue to take them down and say nothing, say something to her again or something else?

Since you are new to Facebook, you may not completely understand how it works. I could be wrong, but I don't think your friend is posting these things to your page directly. I believe she's probably sharing posts from other sites and it shows up for all her friends to see. Because you are friends, things she posts will appear in your News Feed. Anyone who is friends with her will see the same thing you do. She has the right to post what she wants, but if you don't want to see it, you can hide her or unfollow her without unfriending. If you do that, however, you won't see anything from her - no family news, pictures, funny memes, funny videos, etc. If she indeed is sharing to a general audience (her friends), you don't have to worry about others thinking you are in agreement with her. If you are seeing it because it's a News Feed item, and not a direct post on your wall, others can't see it so you don't have to delete. You can just scroll past the posts that don't interest you.

Re: What Would You Do?

Nancy Drew — Tue, 09 Oct 2018 18:55:15 GMT

Re: What Would You Do?

haddon9 — Sun, 02 Sep 2018 14:57:02 GMT

What would I do? I would just ignore it.

Keep in mind that she's not posting this on YOUR page...she's posting it on her own. It's Facebook that has it showing up on your feed so you can see what your friend has to say. Others won't think it's from you as they can't see it. There probably is a way to stop receiving her postings but I'm not sure how.

If you have a lot of FB friends there is always going to be someone who posts things that you don't agree with.

Re: What Would You Do?

haddon9 — Sun, 02 Sep 2018 14:58:57 GMT

@cherry wrote:
I would simply unfriend her. You asked her nicely not to do it. She has no respect for your wishes. There is always one isn't there?

@cherry . This friend isn't posting on the OP's page, it's Facebook that's posting it on her feed.

Re: What Would You Do?

Sage04 — Sun, 02 Sep 2018 15:14:46 GMT

There is also a SNOOZE button which I use. Itś for 30days and when it is about to expire

FB notifies you. You can still check the personś FB page while this is happening.