topic Re: Thank You Notes in Community Chat

Thank You Notes

grandma r — Sat, 14 Jul 2018 22:34:21 GMT

Have thank you notes become a thing of the past? Just curious. Yes, I am older, however, we learned that sending a "thank you" was important and polite.

Over the past few years I've noticed that a number of younger adults don't send any thank you for shower, wedding, or graduation gifts.

Re: Thank You Notes

bonappetit — Sat, 14 Jul 2018 22:38:04 GMT

Yes, apparently manners are not in fashion today. I don't receive any acknowledgements, or thank you notes.

Re: Thank You Notes

Kachina624 — Sat, 14 Jul 2018 22:38:41 GMT

Apparently they are because I surely haven't gotten any lately.

Re: Thank You Notes

VanSleepy — Sat, 14 Jul 2018 22:44:22 GMT

I see this complaint a lot. I guess my friends raised their children right - I always get a thank you note for weddings, showers, birthdays, etc.

Re: Thank You Notes

spiderw — Sat, 14 Jul 2018 22:45:34 GMT

This is just another ill mannered issue out there, not thanking a person. I too was taught to write thank you notes and still do. I also thank by e-mail at times depending on the situation. I do have family members who thank me and others who do not. Thanking someone is a courtesy which should be taught by parents and reinforced at school. It is rude to not acknowledge a gift or whatever is exchanged and it can hurt also.

Re: Thank You Notes

Financialgrl — Sat, 14 Jul 2018 22:51:35 GMT

Half and half. I'm lucky - my sister's kids are in their 20s and it's like that was branded into their brains growing up. Her daughter has ALWAYS sent thank you cards and what I love - each card is personalized as to the gift you sent and always a lovely thought about how thankful she is that we (family) are in her life. Her brother - well I've always gotten a card from him as well but he's a 24 y/o guy so his message is almost always - "thank you for the money - I intend to use this toward ________)" - one that probably is the same on all the cards he sends - BUT hey I'll take that! It's funny cuz when he graduated I got a call from my sister - checking up to see if he'd sent TY cards. Had he not done so he'd have heard about it from her.

OTOH, my brother's kids - have never seen a TY card from any of the 3 of them.

Re: Thank You Notes

lovesrecess — Sat, 14 Jul 2018 22:58:35 GMT

Manners never go out of style, but thank you notes seem to be. I still think all gifts should be acknowledged with a note of appreciation. I hate online thank-yous...disrespectful in my opinion. Even some of our grandkids have failed to even acknowledge a gift we have sent....my son called and said Johnny said to tell you thanks for the gift...Johnny is 14.... he can thank me himself!

Re: Thank You Notes

lovesrecess — Sat, 14 Jul 2018 23:00:31 GMT

Are you tempted not to send another gift to a person who doesn't acknowledge one ?

Re: Thank You Notes

willdob3 — Sat, 14 Jul 2018 23:03:49 GMT

@grandma r

Thank you has become a thing of the past when it comes to younger people. It’s are nice but I’d be happy to get a thank you email or text.

Re: Thank You Notes

blackhole99 — Sat, 14 Jul 2018 23:10:52 GMT

@lovesrecess wrote:
Are you tempted not to send another gift to a person who doesn't acknowledge one ?

If I don't get an acknowledgement that you received my gift, you will never get another. If the kids do not want to write thank you notes they can email, text, or even call. Good manners is never out of fashion or obsolete.

Re: Thank You Notes

I am appleblossom — Sat, 14 Jul 2018 23:14:17 GMT

I get texts and phone calls from the younger kids in my family. GTher3e is a 13yr old who sent a written note otherwise I get texts and phone calls. At least I know they received the card.

Re: Thank You Notes

bikerbabe — Sat, 14 Jul 2018 23:24:31 GMT

IMO a verbal or email thank you is perfectly fine.

Re: Thank You Notes

Barb114 — Sat, 14 Jul 2018 23:28:33 GMT

Unfortunately, thank you notes have become a lost art. This generation is the give me generation with no manners. The parent don't seem to care. How were they brought up?

Re: Thank You Notes

OKPrincess — Sat, 14 Jul 2018 23:35:15 GMT

It works both ways — gifts can be obsolete and old fashioned too!!

Re: Thank You Notes

drizzellla — Sat, 14 Jul 2018 23:37:41 GMT

It seemed every year it got harder to get my son to write Thank You notes. One year I kept nagging him, I bet it was everyday. He kept saying he would write them. But never did. So I told everyone PLEASE do not send him anymore gifts. If he couldn't write a thank you note. He did not deserve any gifts.

Re: Thank You Notes

software — Sat, 14 Jul 2018 23:54:55 GMT

I recently received a lovely, hand written thank you note from a young man for a high school graduation gift.

Re: Thank You Notes

Jordan2 — Sat, 14 Jul 2018 23:59:50 GMT

If it’s a wedding, engagement, shower gift I usually get a written thank you ( I think it’s the party element that the recipient feels they should thank you). If it’s a birthday present I’ll get a verbal thank you and that’s it.

Re: Thank You Notes

on the bay — Sun, 15 Jul 2018 00:10:03 GMT

My daughters and me too, always send thank you's in the mail. It makes people feel good and appreciated and acknowledged and it only takes some time and thought! I love getting them too!

My son always acknowledges gifts but not always with a card-it may be by phone or text and to me they are just as heartfelt.

I do have nieces and nephews who I never know if they got something unless I call and ask. I think some just never have and its not something they do now. It is disappointing.

I'm always excited to send a gift for special occasions and waiting to hear if they liked it and if I never hear anything, that just takes a lot of joy out of it. And probably after several times of this, I'll just send a card.

Re: Thank You Notes

Annabellethecat66 — Sun, 15 Jul 2018 00:10:09 GMT

My daughters and their children always send thank you notes.

I send out thank you notes all of the time.

Often I'll take my oldest daughter's children (mostly teenagers) shoe shopping, out to lunch, book shopping, things like that.

A few days later I get a thank you note from them. Each child writes notes on the card. They're handwritten and specific.

My youngest daughter always sends me thank you notes too. She lives in Colorado. Sometimes if she sees a funny card she'll send it to me. Recently, she sent me a comic card of a woman carrying lots of grocery bags on her arm (frantically struggling). The card said, "Finally, I did it! I carried everything on one arm"!

She knew I'd think it was funny because I'm aways bragging about carrying so many bags up my stairs!

Another friend bought me a coffee cup with a squirrel on it that says, "Excuse me....you're out of birdseed". She sent that because I'm always complaining about the squirrels eating all of my bird seed.

Just funny things! I'll send people who might need a little lift flowers with a note that says, "I love you and I'm thinking of you". I don't go to funerals or send flowers, I believe in acknowledging love for a person when they're alive and you can tell them.

My girls grew up watching me do this so I guess it's true that children learn from their parents and what they see the parents doing.....maybe.

Re: Thank You Notes

Barb114 — Sun, 15 Jul 2018 00:18:10 GMT

@Annabellethecat66

It was a pleasure reading what you just wrote. Refreshing is another word. You seem like a wonderful person with a beautiful family.