topic Re: so true in Community Chat

so true

catlover — Fri, 16 Mar 2018 21:37:14 GMT

Re: so true

Trinity11 — Fri, 16 Mar 2018 21:40:12 GMT

True to a certain extent but you need to learn to pick your battles wisely. There are times it is just not worth it and a person is better off retreating...

Re: so true

Mz iMac — Fri, 16 Mar 2018 21:42:35 GMT

Re: so true

deepwaterdotter — Fri, 16 Mar 2018 21:55:27 GMT

I guess I'm a pacifist, inside and out.

Re: so true

151949 — Fri, 16 Mar 2018 22:01:30 GMT

Ever since my DH's stroke he nit picks at everything all day long! I will do almost anything to avoid listening to it. So thus - he ALWAYS gets his way.

Re: so true

QVCkitty1 — Fri, 16 Mar 2018 22:14:15 GMT

I have always hated confrontation, but I learned that if it is really important, I have to put on my big girl britches and fight the good fight.

Re: so true

skuggles — Fri, 16 Mar 2018 22:17:40 GMT

I don't think that is avoiding the conflict. It's telling yourself you can't get what you want without a conflict ridden exchange that must be avoided for reasons you can't fully accept. That leaves you conflicted. There are so many different ways to rethink problems and their solutions.

Re: so true

Catiele — Fri, 16 Mar 2018 22:17:41 GMT

151940 It must be difficult for you to deal with this every day. You are in my prayers. Try to take care of you.

Re: so true

LTT1 — Fri, 16 Mar 2018 22:18:41 GMT

@catlover @QVCkitty1 @151949 @deepwaterdotter @Mz iMac

Sometimes, not always, a situation needs to be addressed rather than confronted.

I do not think I was ever taught enough techniques to address situations where disagreements are imminent.

Instead, it seems much easier to retreat.

Instead, I need some counter-measures! lol 😂

Re: so true

Cakers3 — Fri, 16 Mar 2018 23:30:19 GMT

I think this quote has value but the value is determined by how a person perceives his/her avoidance of conflict.

If avoided with resentment, then yes, an internal war can result. Feelings of being used, feelings of disagreeing on the inside while smiling on the outside, feelings of not really trying to keep the peace but rather feeling inadequate and lacking the skills to deal with the conflict.

Conflict isn't necessarily a bad thing; it is how it is handled that will either resolve the situation or make it an all out battle.

This also depends upon if the conflict is on a personal level or if the conflict is being observed as an outsider.

Re: so true

LTT1 — Sat, 17 Mar 2018 11:48:13 GMT

@catlover

Regarding the quote, I would hate to think someone lives that way. Stuffing our feelings is unhealthy. I couldn’t live with internal battles. That is sad — it seems to be all or nothing.