topic Re: Single Diners - Your Thoughts in Community Chat

Single Diners - Your Thoughts

Moonchilde — Thu, 04 Jan 2018 22:34:56 GMT

Just putting this out there for discussion.

When I go out to eat, mostly for lunch, late lunch or early dinner, I am alone 99% of the time. I’m happy to spend, from a burger to lobster, whatever the restaurant charges. I don’t look or act strange, and I tip very well.

My pet peeve is restaurants who discriminate against a “table for one.” There are restaurants who refuse to seat a party of one at view tables or desirable tables. I have had a restaurant tell me that I cannot even sit at a crummy table for two next to the kitchen, because two people dining together “might” come in and want it.

Conversely, I have gone into very expensive showcase type of restaurants who treat me like a lone queen.

Most times its management, but sometimes it’s the servers who would rather get the tip from a party of 2-4 than from me by myself - the servers refuse to serve you by ignoring you as if you weren’t even there until you get up and walk out.

Some people I’ve talked to about this consider it blatant illegal discrimination. But IMO the restaurants cover themselves with the “We have the right to refuse service to anyone” bit, or “you can sit here but you can’t sit there”, so not saying they won’t serve you at all.

I’d love to see someone start a class action lawsuit on behalf of single diners. It’s IS a social discrimination.

And yes, when this happens to me, I do get up and walk out, and I don’t t return. I also tell my local friends and family, who have said that based on my experience they will no longer go there or recommend it because of that kind of policy. People that I tell are usually shocked and horrified at how I’ve been treated and what’s been said to me.

Note: - I’m not saying establishments categorically refuse to serve me, they normally don’t (except for one recent incident where I was told I could not have a table specifically because I was alone and for no other reason. Not just not a good table, NO table for me. I’m talking about going out of their way to make single diners feel “less than” and discriminated against. It makes my blood boil.

Thoughts and experiences?

Re: Single Diners - Your Thoughts

I am still oxox — Thu, 04 Jan 2018 22:36:30 GMT

I eat lunch out and alone 80% of the time, I have never felt any discrimination of any kind

Re: Single Diners - Your Thoughts

lOVETOSHOP — Thu, 04 Jan 2018 22:40:06 GMT

I never dine alone, but I agree that it seems very discriminatory to refuse to seat someone just because they are dining alone. Would it affect their business THAT much?! They should be happy to serve EVERYONE, including single diners. You would think that they would be happy to serve a customer, single or not, and have that customer leave satisfied with their dining experience and by word-of-mouth, recommend their establishment to others.

Re: Single Diners - Your Thoughts

NickNack — Thu, 04 Jan 2018 22:42:13 GMT

My friend thinks I'm ridiculous, but I don't like to eat alone. I have done it when I'm out of town alone and occasionally in town. I often meet people at restaurants, and when I go in alone the host/hostess will stand there with a menu and ask me if I need a table for one. I've never felt like they wouldn't serve me. I think that's really awful that they make you feel like that.

Re: Single Diners - Your Thoughts

MickD — Thu, 04 Jan 2018 22:42:56 GMT

While I've never been refused a table for one. I would not/have not hogged a 2-4 top with an ocean view...wouldn't feel right. It is appropriate to sit at a bar and dine as one.....done many a time...and I've met quite a few characters.

Re: Single Diners - Your Thoughts

GCR18 — Thu, 04 Jan 2018 22:43:16 GMT

I've eaten out alone whether while traveling for work or here at home. I haven't experienced the issues you mentioned. Occasionally, I'll get seated in a crappy seat. I immediately ask to be seated elsewhere and am accommodated.

Re: Single Diners - Your Thoughts

Marp — Thu, 04 Jan 2018 22:43:43 GMT

@Moonchilde wrote:
Just putting this out there for discussion.

When I go out to eat, mostly for lunch, late lunch or early dinner, I am alone 99% of the time. I’m happy to spend, from a burger to lobster, whatever the restaurant charges. I don’t look or act strange, and I tip very well.

My pet peeve is restaurants who discriminate against a “table for one.” There are restaurants who refuse to seat a party of one at view tables or desirable tables. I have had a restaurant tell me that I cannot even sit at a crummy table for two next to the kitchen, because two people dining together “might” come in and want it.

Conversely, I have gone into very expensive showcase type of restaurants who treat me like a lone queen.

Most times its management, but sometimes it’s the servers who would rather get the tip from a party of 2-4 than from me by myself - the servers refuse to serve you by ignoring you as if you weren’t even there until you get up and walk out.

Some people I’ve talked to about this consider it blatant illegal discrimination. But IMO the restaurants cover themselves with the “We have the right to refuse service to anyone” bit, or “you can sit here but you can’t sit there”, so not saying they won’t serve you at all.

I’d love to see someone start a class action lawsuit on behalf of single diners. It’s IS a social discrimination.

And yes, when this happens to me, I do get up and walk out, and I don’t t return. I also tell my local friends and family, who have said that based on my experience they will no longer go there or recommend it because of that kind of policy. People that I tell are usually shocked and horrified at how I’ve been treated and what’s been said to me.

Note: - I’m not saying establishments categorically refuse to serve me, they normally don’t (except for one recent incident where I was told I could not have a table specifically because I was alone and for no other reason. Not just not a good table, NO table for me. I’m talking about going out of their way to make single diners feel “less than” and discriminated against. It makes my blood boil.

Thoughts and experiences?

YOU believe it is actionable. YOU are aggrieved. YOU are "someone".

Re: Single Diners - Your Thoughts

Lucky Dog — Thu, 04 Jan 2018 22:45:16 GMT

A local newspaper or news station could do a story on this.

Re: Single Diners - Your Thoughts

Moonchilde — Thu, 04 Jan 2018 22:48:13 GMT

@lOVETOSHOP wrote:
I never dine alone, but I agree that it seems very discriminatory to refuse to seat someone just because they are dining alone. Would it affect their business THAT much?! They should be happy to serve EVERYONE, including single diners. You would think that they would be happy to serve a customer, single or not, and have that customer leave satisfied with their dining experience and by word-of-mouth, recommend their establishment to others.

Yes, @lOVETOSHOP, you would indeed think...

Re: Single Diners - Your Thoughts

Moonchilde — Thu, 04 Jan 2018 22:50:07 GMT

@Nicknack wrote:
My friend thinks I'm ridiculous, but I don't like to eat alone. I have done it when I'm out of town alone and occasionally in town. I often meet people at restaurants, and when I go in alone the host/hostess will stand there with a menu and ask me if I need a table for one. I've never felt like they wouldn't serve me. I think that's really awful that they make you feel like that.

@NickNack I’ve never liked to do dinner solo, but I’m fine with lunch.

Re: Single Diners - Your Thoughts

sunshine45 — Thu, 04 Jan 2018 22:55:02 GMT

i enjoy eating alone at times and i have never experienced this problem.

i like to take a book, magazine, or my phone to keep myself occupied.

have never been "denied" a table or discriminated against in that way.

Re: Single Diners - Your Thoughts

Pandalady — Thu, 04 Jan 2018 22:56:54 GMT

@Lucky Dog wrote:
A local newspaper or news station could do a story on this.

I was just thinking it would make a fabulous ABC show "What Would You Do" scenario for John Q. Personally, on the occasions that I have to eat out alone, it is usually at a fast casual style restaurant. That is just my preference but I would never fault people for any dining (or any) decisions that they would make. Everyone should feel that they could make a choice that suits him/her.

Re: Single Diners - Your Thoughts

Moonchilde — Thu, 04 Jan 2018 22:57:00 GMT

@MickD wrote:
While I've never been refused a table for one. I would not/have not hogged a 2-4 top with an ocean view...wouldn't feel right. It is appropriate to sit at a bar and dine as one.....done many a time...and I've met quite a few characters.

Yet I’ve been taken right to a prime ocean view table for four by the hostess who was happy to seat me there - I didn’t even ask or expect it.

I would never ever “just go sit in the bar.” Heck to the no. I am not an undesirable second-class patron simply because I don’t come in a pair. I have also offered, once I was seated at a prime table for four, to move to a table for two (which wasn’t available when I walked in) when a party of four walked in.

Re: Single Diners - Your Thoughts

CLHS68 — Thu, 04 Jan 2018 23:02:09 GMT

Maybe they could just charge you double like cruise ship do single travlers. I don't think you would like that either.

Re: Single Diners - Your Thoughts, whether to

Q4u — Thu, 04 Jan 2018 23:02:18 GMT

I think that I would leave an explicit, well worded review on their Website and Facebook page. Discrimination in any form is destructive.

Re: Single Diners - Your Thoughts

Carmie — Thu, 04 Jan 2018 23:02:52 GMT

Quite a few years ago, a female coworker and I were sent to Ontario Canada for training. In the evening we walked around the city and looked for interesting restaurants to try.

A restaurant had their menu out front and we liked what we saw. There were few patrons in there, so we just walked in and waited to be seated.

We were greeted and asked how many were in our party...we said two. We we told that women could not eat in that restaurant unless we were accompanied by a man. I thought he was kidding and laughed. He wasn’t kidding.

i explained that we were Americans and did not live local and I was married, my coworker was single. Did he expect us to go out on the street like a couple of strumpets and find a man? He finally said we could dine there, but he seated us in a dark corner.

His reasoning had to do with his license for alcohol. He tried to explain it to me, but finally gave up and served us. We were both non drinkers.

I have never had a problem in America being seated when dining alone. I really don’t care where I sit, but prefer a table. I hate booth seating. Now, maybe if the restaurant was crowded, I could understand why they would be hesitant to seat a lone diner at a popular table. I would expect if you ate there often, they could give a lone diner a nice table.

Re: Single Diners - Your Thoughts

cherry — Thu, 04 Jan 2018 23:04:16 GMT

I notice a lot of singles ,when we eat out at breakfast time. They all seem to get good service but they are regulars, and some of them are women

I will start paying attention when we eat out. I only ate out alone ,when Mr Cherry was in the hospital. I went to our regular establishment ,and was treated well ,of course

We tend to go to family run places, and I think they treat everyone well. I will keep an eye out from now on

Re: Single Diners - Your Thoughts

NycVixen — Thu, 04 Jan 2018 23:07:45 GMT

A diner near my university does this to me. It makes me upset because most of the time when I go there, it's basically empty and they still want me to sit at the counter where all the staff start to ask you where you're from etc. I put my foot down after sitting at the counter once and I got a table but I just stopped going. It's not worth the hassle.

Meanwhile, another establishment an actual restaurant, has no problem. They have smaller tables just for one or two people. I do agree that it seems to be the wait staff that rather have more people at a booth or table for the tip. I understand when the place is packed, but if it's empty it makes no sense.

Re: Single Diners - Your Thoughts

missy1 — Thu, 04 Jan 2018 23:17:52 GMT

I used to eat out many times alone. I would go to places like Golden Corall, Chinese buffet, casino buffets, and places like TGIF's. I never had any problems, dining alone. I have been to even Disneyland and the movies alone. I am guessing fine dining they would save the better tables for more than one dining? not sure.

When I did eat alone, I would like more private tables/corner seating. (not in the middle of everyone) I would eat alone now, but I would rather spend my $ on other stuff.

edit: typo

Re: Single Diners - Your Thoughts

Moonchilde — Thu, 04 Jan 2018 23:10:12 GMT

@Marp wrote:
@Moonchilde wrote:
Just putting this out there for discussion.

When I go out to eat, mostly for lunch, late lunch or early dinner, I am alone 99% of the time. I’m happy to spend, from a burger to lobster, whatever the restaurant charges. I don’t look or act strange, and I tip very well.

My pet peeve is restaurants who discriminate against a “table for one.” There are restaurants who refuse to seat a party of one at view tables or desirable tables. I have had a restaurant tell me that I cannot even sit at a crummy table for two next to the kitchen, because two people dining together “might” come in and want it.

Conversely, I have gone into very expensive showcase type of restaurants who treat me like a lone queen.

Most times its management, but sometimes it’s the servers who would rather get the tip from a party of 2-4 than from me by myself - the servers refuse to serve you by ignoring you as if you weren’t even there until you get up and walk out.

Some people I’ve talked to about this consider it blatant illegal discrimination. But IMO the restaurants cover themselves with the “We have the right to refuse service to anyone” bit, or “you can sit here but you can’t sit there”, so not saying they won’t serve you at all.

I’d love to see someone start a class action lawsuit on behalf of single diners. It’s IS a social discrimination.

And yes, when this happens to me, I do get up and walk out, and I don’t t return. I also tell my local friends and family, who have said that based on my experience they will no longer go there or recommend it because of that kind of policy. People that I tell are usually shocked and horrified at how I’ve been treated and what’s been said to me.

Note: - I’m not saying establishments categorically refuse to serve me, they normally don’t (except for one recent incident where I was told I could not have a table specifically because I was alone and for no other reason. Not just not a good table, NO table for me. I’m talking about going out of their way to make single diners feel “less than” and discriminated against. It makes my blood boil.

Thoughts and experiences?
YOU believe it is actionable. YOU are aggrieved. YOU are "someone".

BUT I’m also intelligent enough to know that management has covered their butts. “We reserve the right” is the bottom line. Class action lawsuits are successful when it comes to basic civil rights - treating men differently than women, discriminating against someone with a disability, that type of thing. But suing someone because they made you feel bad, or gave you lesser service than the table for four...that’s not a good enough reason. They aren’t breaking any laws (to my knowledge) they just have rude policies in place. They’re not refusing to serve at all, just putting conditions out there that pinpoint a ‘second class status.’

I wish someone would do it, just to see what would happen. I wish it was actionable, but I personally don’t believe it is. I just detest the practice.