topic Re: Strong perfume in Community Chat

Strong perfume

chihuahuamom — Sun, 14 May 2017 06:40:25 GMT

I see this sweet lady about once a week at church, and she often gives me a hug. Problem is she wears something that really, frankly, smells awful and after that hug, I smell like her for a while. I know it is some kind of fragrance, but evidently it's either just stinky to my nose or it changes on her skin. I guess you just have to live with things like that, because I don't want to stop hugging her! I don't know her enough to comment (and even if I did, I don't think I would). What to do besides giving her a gift of a nice smelling lotion???

Re: Strong perfume

LOVEMYFURBABY — Sun, 14 May 2017 09:50:28 GMT

You have a very nice fragrance. Can you share with me the name of it. Then, tell her you can't wear strong fragrance, They usually change on some people and probably would enter the room before you would, or try to tell her in a sutle way without her knowing what you are doing. She may let up a little on the fragrance. When I was in the work arena, I had no that some people may be allergic

Re: Strong perfume

AngelPuppy1 — Sun, 14 May 2017 10:25:26 GMT

I know what you mean. Strong scents give me migraines. Luckily you don't have to be in contact with her much, so I really don't think I would do or say anything to her. I'm sure she loves her perfume and thinks it smells wonderful. I wouldn't want to hurt her feelings. If you had to be around her all the time it would be a different story perhaps.

Re: Strong perfume

Desertdi — Sun, 14 May 2017 10:47:35 GMT

Some "seniors" have a diminished sense of smell...........They probably are unaware of the HEAVY perfume they are wearing.

Re: Strong perfume

StylishLady — Sun, 14 May 2017 11:25:17 GMT

Could be worse. Could be a cigarette smoker. Smokers likely don't realize it either. I remember when I finally quit in 1991, my leather coats smelled like an ashtray. Ugh.

Re: Strong perfume

missy1 — Sun, 14 May 2017 11:33:50 GMT

I can't wear perfume. Strong smelling perfume on people is as bad as them smelling like smoke IMO. They should ban it in some public places, like smoking. I am glad many Dr. offices have signs that say don't wear it in here.

Re: Strong perfume

candys mine — Sun, 14 May 2017 11:33:11 GMT

If she is older I think her generation grew up with bold perfumes. If her perfume it truely, obviously, overdone, Perhaps it is her polite way of masking some other smell that may occur about her.

Could you wear a shawl or sweater to Service that you can remove after the hug? I'm sorry the perfume doesn't agree with you but I'm sure your huggs are a bright spot in this womans day!

Re: Strong perfume

Yardlie — Sun, 14 May 2017 12:28:50 GMT

@Desertdi wrote:
Some "seniors" have a diminished sense of smell...........They probably are unaware of the HEAVY perfume they are wearing.

Definitely! As I was leaving the bank the other day, I passed an older lady who was coming in. She had on a very heavy dose of extremely pungent perfume. It was enough to knock you over. I always try to keep in mind three things: (1) Many seniors do have a somewhat diminished sense of smell. (I am a senior.) (2) What one person finds to be a pleasant scent may be extremely stinky and offensive to another person. (3) There are a lot of people who get headaches, asthma, and other problems from strong fragrances (myself included). Add to that the fact that some people do not shower every day, so the body odor mixed in with the perfume is enough to make you gag.

Re: Strong perfume

SharkE — Sun, 14 May 2017 12:44:41 GMT

@StylishLady wrote:
Could be worse. Could be a cigarette smoker. Smokers likely don't realize it either. I remember when I finally quit in 1991, my leather coats smelled like an ashtray. Ugh.

Yeah, it's in their hair, clothes, houses stink and cars.

Re: Strong perfume

Mmsfoxxie — Sun, 14 May 2017 12:54:06 GMT

Senior or not, not everybody considers the same fragrant to be strong. I've seen on the boards here where someone asks suggestions on a light scented perfume and I'm always surprised by some of the suggestions.

There is one by Dolce & Garbana (spelling might be wrong) that I consider very strong and several here consider it light.

I think that I would kind of hold the hugger at arms length and give her a big smile and friendly greeting and then tell her that her cologne doesn't agree with you. I would understand if someone told me that.

Re: Strong perfume

dex — Sun, 14 May 2017 13:37:21 GMT

@chihuahuamom Since it is only once a week and you don't have much other contact after the hug....I would let it go.She probably enjoys trying to be pretty and smelling pretty is about all she has left at her age.I remember the philosophy girls always said that scent lifts your spirits and draws people in.I know that isn't always true but she might feel that way.I try to think when I am in a situation that isn't going well for me that it is a test of my character.

Re: Strong perfume

hoosieroriginal — Sun, 14 May 2017 14:34:23 GMT

Perfumes should be banned - there are too many people out there with allergies to that stuff. I hate being around people with perfume on. Worked with an attorney who poured old lady perfume on every day - the attorneys had an intervention with her and told her to stop wearing it - it was giving everyone headaches.

Re: Strong perfume

brandiwine — Sun, 14 May 2017 14:41:18 GMT

I hate when people go out in public with a strong scent. It's so rude to others and especially thoughtless to those with allergies and asthma. So many women add a little "extra" because they can no longer smell it. They don't seem to realize the rest of the world has to live with it. Our DR's offices have banned all perfumes and aftershaves. When I was working it was banned there as well. Be thoughtful to others and wear it in your own home.

Re: Strong perfume

henderson — Sun, 14 May 2017 14:45:42 GMT

My brother-in-law, who passed away a few years ago had my sister tell my mom that he was alllergic to fragrance so my mom didn't wear perfume around him. My mom would put on so much it really bothered him. Found out later he really wasn't allergic, but that's how they handled it. Of course, this was a different situation that you.

Re: Strong perfume

wonderfulworld — Sun, 14 May 2017 14:49:07 GMT

@dex wrote:
@chihuahuamom Since it is only once a week and you don't have much other contact after the hug....I would let it go.She probably enjoys trying to be pretty and smelling pretty is about all she has left at her age.I remember the philosophy girls always said that scent lifts your spirits and draws people in.I know that isn't always true but she might feel that way.I try to think when I am in a situation that isn't going well for me that it is a test of my character.

You sound like a very kind person. I totally agree.

Re: Strong perfume

SharkE — Sun, 14 May 2017 14:54:37 GMT

@henderson wrote:
My brother-in-law, who passed away a few years ago had my sister tell my mom that he was alllergic to fragrance so my mom didn't wear perfume around him. My mom would put on so much it really bothered him. Found out later he really wasn't allergic, but that's how they handled it. Of course, this was a different situation that you.

LOL

Re: Strong perfume

noodleann — Sun, 14 May 2017 15:16:14 GMT

This reminds me of a similar problem I had, minus the hugging bit. A woman who customarily sat in front of me in church wore a fragrance that smelled like honey. Ordinarily that would be nice, except it wasn't. There was more to the scent, something dank and musty, that made it awful. I can shut off my smeller in such situations, and usually did so.

I don't think giving the lady a perfumed gift is a good idea, since you're endorsing the idea of her wearing scent, and you can't know how it'll react with her chemistry. It may be worse than what she's using now.

If you can't shut off your smeller like I do and it really bothers you, you could speak to the church secretary about considering a no-perfume policy for church services. Like banning peanut butter and shellfish for hospitality hour and open table and potlucks, that's not unusual these days and it doesn't make you an ogre. You may be doing your fellow congregants a big favor.

Re: Strong perfume

sidsmom — Wed, 28 Feb 2018 20:53:41 GMT

@chihuahuamom wrote:
I guess you just have to live with things like that, because I don't want to stop hugging her!

You brighten each other's day!

Yes, it's a small price to pay for that wonderful feeling!

❤️🧡💛💚💙💜❤️🧡💛❤️🧡💛💚

❤️🧡❤️🖤 💛 🖤💙💙💙

💙💙💙💙🖤 💙. 🖤💚💚💚

💚💚💚💚💚🖤 🖤❤️❤️❤️❤️

💛💛💛💛💛💛🖤 🖤 💛💛💛💛💛

🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🖤🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡

💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

Re: Strong perfume

chrystaltree — Sun, 14 May 2017 16:00:15 GMT

She'd probably think your lotion was stinky....lol She doesn't have a problem, you do. Scent is an individual thing; we all have our own preferences. I loved my father's mother dearly, she came to visit several times a year and I both loved....and hated her visits. I really didn't like her signature scent, to me it was cloying and sickening and it felt like it took over the house when she visited. It didn't bother anyone else, they didn't care for it but it didn't affect them they way it did me. Later in life when I was a teen and Charlie became my signature scent, my middle sister had the same reaction. She hated it! Omg...the arguments we had over it. She always accused me of wearing too much....I didn't. Accept it for what it is, a minor inconvenience for a few moments, once a week. Forget the scent, think of the hug. After my Granda Helen had a stroke and didn't visit anymore....I would have given anything to walk into my house and smell her "awful" perfume. Anything....

Re: Strong perfume

ROMARY — Sun, 14 May 2017 16:30:53 GMT

I've known a few seniors who simply lost all of their sense of smell. Actually, when I think about it, I'm glad that I have a strong sense of smell. Medically-wise, it's a good sign, from what I've heard. .............. Anyway, there must be a lot of non-seniors who have also lost their sense of smell. There are a few in the neighborhood who have cars containing scents that one can smell clear across the street (when their windows are rolled down and/or when opening their car doors). I'd 'pass out' in no-time, just driving for a block or two. ........... Edited: Some could be those car interior fragrances because some of those car drivers are men. That, or their wives' fragrance scents remain indefinitely in those cars.