topic Younger or Thinner? in Community Chat

Younger or Thinner?

Susan in California — Tue, 02 May 2017 05:31:21 GMT

Just a fun question--nothing serious, but just for the heck of it.

Which compliment would you prefer:

A) You look like you've lost weight.

B) You look so much younger (than you actually are...)

Charlie Rose interviewed Sheila Nevins, HBO's Documentaries President and

Producer. She is seventy eight years old and spoke about how difficult it is to age as a woman, and how all women care about it. She said that is why cosmetic "work, ,botox, make-up creams, etc sell so well. She said women will talk about a lot of personal things but often not their age.

Re: Younger or Thinner?

Kachina624 — Tue, 02 May 2017 05:44:17 GMT

She's spot on with her statement. You can change many things about yourself but not your age. I also would just as soon not talk about it. I refuse to be sucked into the cosmetic hype and buy every jar of goo that comes down the pike. I know there are no miracles in those jars. I've used inexpensive AHA for years, along with their cleanser on my Clarisonic. That's it. My doctor says I don't look my age. My sister, who looks like my twin, and I have slightly oily skin which seems to resist wrinkling. Neither of us has ever used a moisturizer.

Re: Younger or Thinner?

Moonchilde — Tue, 02 May 2017 06:39:56 GMT

I would prefer to be thought thinner!

Through nothing I have done to take credit for, the women in my family don't get lines or facial wrinkles. I'm often judged as 10 years younger than I am, and when my mother passed at 95 she looked about 75. No wrinkles. But that's just luck & DNA. Heaven knows I don't do much maintenance except my Clarisonic.

Re: Younger or Thinner?

hckynut — Tue, 02 May 2017 06:42:33 GMT

(thread title)

I can choose what I want to weigh. As far as I know, I cannot change my chronological age.

hckynut(john)

Re: Younger or Thinner?

qualitygal — Tue, 02 May 2017 08:33:16 GMT

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

It's something I've done all my life like a 2nd job.

Re: Younger or Thinner?

Pook — Tue, 02 May 2017 09:39:32 GMT

Actually neither - you look great is the compliment I would prefer. A can be a body shamming half compliment in many cases and B is often a condescending compliment just said to placate older people just like saying someone is so many years young.

Re: Younger or Thinner?

AngelPuppy1 — Tue, 02 May 2017 09:59:14 GMT

To get a nice heart-felt and sincere compliment --- not matter what it is for -- is so nice and something which really lifts your spirits!

If I could choose, it would be for appearing to look younger! I was blessed for having genes that made me appear much younger my whole life. Now that I am nearly 65 --- aging is very hard. I have to accept it and know it's part of life and nothing you can do about it. I still get told that I look years younger. Whether I do or not ---? I don't know. I look in the mirror and see someone I don't know!

If I get told occasionally that I look nice or that a certain blouse is attractive on me --- then I am happy and it makes me feel good!

Re: Younger or Thinner?

StylishLady — Tue, 02 May 2017 11:53:39 GMT

The compliments I get that I like most are those that say they love my outfits, shoes, etc. They make me feel I'm doing something right.

Re: Younger or Thinner?

Peaches McPhee — Tue, 02 May 2017 11:58:46 GMT

Definitely weight.

I may be an outlier, but I just don't care that much how old I am. I am aging. So what? There is no way I'd want to go back in time. As I look to retirement, now is a great stage of life.

Re: Younger or Thinner?

Mominohio — Tue, 02 May 2017 12:03:59 GMT

I'd pick A because I am usually told I don't look my age,(but lets face it, that usually catches up with us sooner or later). I have struggled with weight all my life, so looking/being thinner would be the winner for me!

And while I agree to some extent with Sheila Nevins take on the difficulty of aging as a woman, I really don't think it is anywhere to close to being 'all women care about it' in the sense of our 'looks'. It comes with so much more burden, caring for aging parents, limits on our own physical abilities, concern over financing our senior years etc, that take up much more time and effort than any wrinkle or sag and what I'm going to consider doing about it with a cream or surgery.

She makes it sound like our looks as we age are our biggest concern, and we hide from our age. I'm sure many do, but I see so many ladies who really embrace their well deserved journey, don't go to lenghts to hide it, and are proud of their advanced age, many not letting it slow them down one bit.

Re: Younger or Thinner?

CalminHeart — Tue, 02 May 2017 12:09:02 GMT

I don't go for either topic. Size and age do not make a person. It's what's on the inside that counts.

Re: Younger or Thinner?

Carmie — Tue, 02 May 2017 12:16:53 GMT

I don't think either statement is a true compliment. I would not feel complimented either way.

I'd rather hear how good I am at doing something or how well something turned out. My accomplishments are more important to me than my looks.

Re: Younger or Thinner?

Mint2 — Tue, 02 May 2017 12:28:05 GMT

Neither, I would like to hear It's good to see you, I've missed you!

Mint

Re: Younger or Thinner?

Greeneyedlady21 — Tue, 02 May 2017 12:30:27 GMT

I'd like to be thinner for health reasons, I'd like to look younger to feel better about myself.

I don't want people commenting on either really-two years ago I lost significant weight due to stress. I had a weight obsessed person in my life constantly commenting on it in a negative and inappropriate way. I finally told her off about it.

My mother has a health condition that makes it extremely difficult for her to gain weight. It's unreal how people feel so free to comment on her thinness. She's self conscious about it so that really bugs me. Most people wouldn't comment on it if it were the reverse, or maybe they would these days. Anything goes.

Re: Younger or Thinner?

Shanus — Tue, 02 May 2017 12:33:32 GMT

I don't love either compliment, but would look at the source...If it comes from a close friend who's opinions you trust, either statement would mean more than if just thrown around by someone who doesn't know you well.

Re: Younger or Thinner?

GCR18 — Tue, 02 May 2017 13:04:18 GMT

I don't care about age, so it would have to be weight.

Re: Younger or Thinner?

SahmIam — Tue, 02 May 2017 13:40:23 GMT

Thinner but only if I actually am.

Re: Younger or Thinner?

SilleeMee — Tue, 02 May 2017 13:49:09 GMT

I wanted to see a third choice:

C) You look so much HAPPIER.

But of the options given, I would pick B.

Re: Younger or Thinner?

Nomorebirthdays — Tue, 02 May 2017 13:58:29 GMT

I am not overweight so younger would be my answer.

Re: Younger or Thinner?

beckyb1012 — Tue, 02 May 2017 14:03:35 GMT

Due to the blessing of genetics and daily hard work I am always underweight for decades now.

I do have some control over daily exercise but gravity is beyond my control so to be told I look younger would be so nice.