topic Re: Compliments in Community Chat

Compliments

pattypeep — Wed, 08 Feb 2017 16:51:03 GMT

Personally, I try to compliment at least one person whenever I go somewhere. It may be a lovey lady standing by me in a store line. You can see their face light up. On the flip side, I have a hard time accepting compliments. How do you handle compliments coming or going?

Re: Compliments

Sassy7356 — Wed, 08 Feb 2017 17:03:53 GMT

They are definitely more easy to give than to accept for myself. I guess I don't feel deserving of compliments. I say "Thank You" and it makes me feel happy but negate it in my mind.

Re: Compliments

golding76 — Wed, 08 Feb 2017 17:07:32 GMT

twopeas, we are two peas in a pod. Like you, I try to compliment others -- often. When out and about, I particularly like to compliment a woman older than I am (that has become increasingly difficult lately -- LOL) who, I feel, has put some effort into presenting herself to the world. I also extend compliments readily to ladies in my age group, or near it, who put their best foot forward.

Like you, I am awkward when it comes to accepting compliments. When any come my way, I must remind myself to stop, take a breath, and then say "thank you" and nothing more. I tend to be one of those self-deprecating types. I immediately hate when I say something stupid following a compliment, so I now try to keep my response restricted to a thank you.

Re: Compliments

freakygirl — Wed, 08 Feb 2017 17:16:14 GMT

i'm the same way. it's so easy for me to compliment someone, and i'm the one who feels blessed that it made them smile and hopefully it brightened their day. it's very tough for me to receive them though. sure i smile and say thank you, but i never feel worthy of it.

Re: Compliments

VanSleepy — Wed, 08 Feb 2017 17:16:58 GMT

@golding76 I am the same with having to remember to just say thank you and leave it at that. I'm usually saying something like, "Thanks. I got it off the clearance rack." lol

Re: Compliments

Keeper of the koi — Wed, 08 Feb 2017 17:20:06 GMT

@pattypeep,accept my compliment sincerely , you are a sweet lovely poster..Maryanne

Re: Compliments

chickenbutt — Wed, 08 Feb 2017 17:24:58 GMT

I'd rather give than receive. I'm not so great at receiving compliments. I guess I get kind of shy about it and, probably from all those years of my so-called mother telling me how worthless and nothing I was, I just don't feel like I deserve so I get uncomfortable.

But I do enjoy complimenting others - not gratuitously, however, as a 'thing' I need to do, but when I really mean what I'm saying.

Re: Compliments

golding76 — Wed, 08 Feb 2017 17:25:46 GMT

VanSleepy, your response sounds exactly like something I would say.

Re: Compliments

PurpleBunny — Wed, 08 Feb 2017 17:31:55 GMT

@pattypeep it makes me feel so good to get a random compliment from a stranger, that I too try to pass it on. You never know what kind of day someone has had or what is going on in their life and that one little kind word might make a difference .

Re: Compliments

meallen616 — Wed, 08 Feb 2017 17:32:23 GMT

Re: Compliments

pattypeep — Wed, 08 Feb 2017 17:55:03 GMT

@Keeper of the koi You are a total.............

Thank you !!

Re: Compliments

Greeneyedlady21 — Wed, 08 Feb 2017 19:20:22 GMT

Compliments are great, it does make you feel good to give them.

I think those of us who don't receive them well should try our best to do better with that and believe we deserve them. Because we do.

Re: Compliments

ladyroxanne — Wed, 08 Feb 2017 19:31:34 GMT

i'm always complimenting people. it makes them feel good and that in turn makes me feel good.

my getting compliments , i also had a problem accepting them. as time has gone on i finally realized that i was not gracious to the person who was giving me a compliment. now i'm able to smile and say thank you. it really is so easy. i like getting compliments and they really make my day!

Re: Compliments

Greeneyedlady21 — Wed, 08 Feb 2017 19:46:34 GMT

@ladyroxanne That's a lovely post, there's a compliment for you

Re: Compliments

ladyroxanne — Wed, 08 Feb 2017 19:51:41 GMT

thank you @Greeneyedlady21. really appreciate it!

i won't forget you.

Re: Compliments

dex — Wed, 08 Feb 2017 20:22:44 GMT

@chickenbutt I agree with you and I have a hard time accepting too but I do love to hand them out and mean it.My mom always gave a compliment followed by a zinger.She liked to tell me that I was beautiful but didn't have nice teeth so I should smile with my mouth shut.

Re: Compliments

Poodlepet2 — Wed, 08 Feb 2017 20:33:26 GMT

I have learned to accept them graciously. For example, if somebody said, "You look great in that outfit"in my self-deprecating way I would respond " Thank you! I feel like a tub...."

In doing so, I was insulting their judgment by not accepting their kind words.

I do love giving compliments, but it's interesting how self-deprecating people can be. I wonder why-myself included. Are we afraid of being perceived as thinking highly of ourselves?

Poodlepet2

Re: Compliments

faeriemoon — Wed, 08 Feb 2017 20:56:00 GMT

I enjoy giving and receiving compliments.

Re: Compliments

Lovingq — Wed, 08 Feb 2017 21:28:37 GMT

Compliments can sometimes be considered unkind. A young man who works at the grocery store I've been going to for years (probably in his 20's} joined a gym and his formerly rotund body and face transformed into a chisled body and chisled facial features. Translation....this man was now smoking hot.

I didn't recognize him, the difference was so profound. When I found myself complimenting him I then realized that not everyone likes to be reminded that no one paid any attention when fat. Hurtful then and hurtful now. Another thing, was I objectifying him....something that women always protest that men do?

Re: Compliments

pattypeep — Wed, 08 Feb 2017 22:19:02 GMT

@Greeneyedlady21 Repeat after me: