topic Re: Aliens, etc. in Wellness

Aliens, etc.

LilacTree — Sat, 25 Jun 2016 16:19:52 GMT

I have two "younger" brothers, ages 75 and 71. The older of the two has always been a hippie. In fact, he left us for 25 years and never contacted us the whole time. We thought he was dead. However, my youngest daughter found him via an online search and he came back from the west coast in 1995.

This brother is obsessive about marijuana and always has been. He thinks it cures everything and talks about it constantly. He also screams and yells at his computer, his truck, the TV, kitchen appliances and anything else he can't get to "work."

The latest is aliens. He's convinced they walk among us and swears a flying saucer landed beside his ship in the Mediterranean when he was in the Navy. He said the government still communicates with him every year to make sure he hasn't told anyone about that "contact." (We have never seen any proof of that, he says it's "top secret" the way they do it.)

He also has increasingly severe anger issues. Since he lives with my younger brother (absolutely the opposite in character, intelligence, etc.) I told my younger brother that he should try to get our brother tested. He said he could never get him to do that. Thing is, my poor younger brother is having to deal with this.

What would you do?

Re: Aliens, etc.

Desertdi — Sat, 25 Jun 2016 16:24:47 GMT

Buy him a ticket to Arizona...........nobody would notice him here. If he is a taxpayer, that would be even better (!) Only joking, of course........but at his age, he probably isn't going to change his ways.

Re: Aliens, etc.

catwhisperer — Sat, 25 Jun 2016 16:25:49 GMT

Yikes! I would just stay far away from that situation.

Re: Aliens, etc.

DoneTryin — Sat, 25 Jun 2016 16:28:39 GMT

Oh, my. Is there any chance of getting him to a doctor for a thorough exam? There may be physical problems causing his anger & other issues. I know it may be a struggle to get him to go, but it's worth a try. Good luck to you & your family as you face this challenge!

Re: Aliens, etc.

hoosieroriginal — Sat, 25 Jun 2016 16:31:10 GMT

Sometimes you do have to just let it go. My sister was bipolar and was so hard to deal with. After years of trying, I finally gave up and cut her off. She died at age 58 and I know she is in a better place. She was angry her entire life, yelling, screaming, throwing fits, or would call you and not say a word after "hello". Mental illness is reallly sad.

Re: Aliens, etc.

LilacTree — Sat, 25 Jun 2016 16:31:33 GMT

@Desertdi wrote:
Buy him a ticket to Arizona...........nobody would notice him here. If he is a taxpayer, that would be even better (!) Only joking, of course........but at his age, he probably isn't going to change his ways.

@Desertdi

LOL, you made me laugh! Parts of this are amusing, I know. But obviously I'm thinking dementia/Alzheimers. My youngest brother says he's also very forgetful (but we all are at this age).

Re: Aliens, etc.

ECBG — Sat, 25 Jun 2016 16:31:49 GMT

He may have to be declaired incompetent if he can't care for himself and put in care which would additionally be needed if he's a danger to anyone including himself.

Re: Aliens, etc.

LilacTree — Sat, 25 Jun 2016 16:34:26 GMT

@ECBG wrote:
He may have to be declaired incompetent if he can't care for himself and put in care which would additionally be needed if he's a danger to anyone including himself.

@ECBG

He is a veteran. Hopefully if it gets worse, he can get help at the VA. He's healthy as a horse physically.

Re: Aliens, etc.

ECBG — Sat, 25 Jun 2016 16:36:20 GMT

@LilacTree wrote:
@ECBG wrote:
He may have to be declaired incompetent if he can't care for himself and put in care which would additionally be needed if he's a danger to anyone including himself.
@ECBG
He is a veteran. Hopefully if it gets worse, he can get help at the VA. He's healthy as a horse physically.

@LilacTreeMental health over rides physical. I'd call them immediately before something unfortunate happens.

Re: Aliens, etc.

LilacTree — Sat, 25 Jun 2016 16:53:44 GMT

@hoosieroriginal wrote:
Sometimes you do have to just let it go. My sister was bipolar and was so hard to deal with. After years of trying, I finally gave up and cut her off. She died at age 58 and I know she is in a better place. She was angry her entire life, yelling, screaming, throwing fits, or would call you and not say a word after "hello". Mental illness is reallly sad.

@hoosieroriginal

That is so sad. My former best friend had an adopted daughter who was bipolar (or whatever it's called these days). I think there's a genetic component. She was also an alcoholic, although I think she's been in AA for many years now. She was a beautiful young girl, but I haven't seen her for years.

She had a son who shot himself in the head at the age of 19. And I had seen him very shortly before that. He was also tall and beautiful.

Do you think there is a genetic component?

Re: Aliens, etc.

LilacTree — Sat, 25 Jun 2016 16:56:03 GMT

@DoneTryin wrote:
Oh, my. Is there any chance of getting him to a doctor for a thorough exam? There may be physical problems causing his anger & other issues. I know it may be a struggle to get him to go, but it's worth a try. Good luck to you & your family as you face this challenge!

@DoneTryin

I would do that. I don't think my younger brother wants to go that far, at least not yet. If I lived closer and wasn't so disabled, I think I would try to do more.

Re: Aliens, etc.

Desertdi — Sat, 25 Jun 2016 16:56:44 GMT

@LilacTree wrote:
@Desertdi wrote:
Buy him a ticket to Arizona...........nobody would notice him here. If he is a taxpayer, that would be even better (!) Only joking, of course........but at his age, he probably isn't going to change his ways.
@Desertdi
LOL, you made me laugh! Parts of this are amusing, I know. But obviously I'm thinking dementia/Alzheimers. My youngest brother says he's also very forgetful (but we all are at this age).

@LilacTree I, myself, sometimes worry about Alzheimers......but I kinda resent their commercial about the lady who left her keys in the fridge. I misplace "things", too..........but it's because I no longer work, and really don't have to pay attention to detail any more......(or at least, that's what I tell myself.) di

Re: Aliens, etc.

LilacTree — Sat, 25 Jun 2016 17:03:19 GMT

@Desertdi wrote:
@LilacTree wrote:
@Desertdi wrote:
Buy him a ticket to Arizona...........nobody would notice him here. If he is a taxpayer, that would be even better (!) Only joking, of course........but at his age, he probably isn't going to change his ways.
@Desertdi
LOL, you made me laugh! Parts of this are amusing, I know. But obviously I'm thinking dementia/Alzheimers. My youngest brother says he's also very forgetful (but we all are at this age).
@LilacTree I, myself, sometimes worry about Alzheimers......but I kinda resent their commercial about the lady who left her keys in the fridge. I misplace "things", too..........but it's because I no longer work, and really don't have to pay attention to detail any more......(or at least, that's what I tell myself.) di

I dislike that commercial also. It's too cliche'. I misplace things occasionally too. And I often can't recall words. I was just tested (Medicare Wellness Check) and I was found to be "mildly forgetful." The Nurse Practitioner who administered the test said that was nothing to worry about at my age. And I refuse to worry about it.

Re: Aliens, etc.

Moonchilde — Sat, 25 Jun 2016 17:10:20 GMT

Honestly, I would let Younger Brother do what he wants to do about the situation, BUT -

If he continues to get more and more aggressive to others & turns violent, calling the police out & making them aware would be Step One. If he threatens anyone, especially someone *outside* the family or household, chances are better he could be put on a 48 hr hold in a Psych ward/hospital and be psychologically evaluated - and maybe gotten out of the home permanently that way.

It's very difficult to get someone like this out of a home where they have been living. He isn't going to change, or cooperate, only get worse to the point your other brother will be living in fear of even going to sleep at night. This has the potential to be something seen on the evening news. IMO thinking this kind of thing can be "managed", especially when all concerned are seniors, is dangerous. Not trying to be mean or scary, but I sure wouldn't want to be in that situation.

Re: Aliens, etc.

colliemom4 — Sat, 25 Jun 2016 17:16:36 GMT

I have a relative that's been talking about conspiracy theories, outrageous religious occurrences etc. for years. She owns her own business and has done very well financially. She's never smoked pot or been on any drugs. However, if you sat down and had a conversation with her you'd definitely know something is not right. It's very strange! She has 3 grown kids and they never complain about it. I haven't seen her in years and don't like being around her because it's difficult. She's not mean, but it's tough to hear the stories she discusses and the things she claims have happened to her.

Re: Aliens, etc.

hoosieroriginal — Sat, 25 Jun 2016 17:24:58 GMT

@LilacTree wrote:
@hoosieroriginal wrote:
Sometimes you do have to just let it go. My sister was bipolar and was so hard to deal with. After years of trying, I finally gave up and cut her off. She died at age 58 and I know she is in a better place. She was angry her entire life, yelling, screaming, throwing fits, or would call you and not say a word after "hello". Mental illness is reallly sad.
@hoosieroriginal
That is so sad. My former best friend had an adopted daughter who was bipolar (or whatever it's called these days). I think there's a genetic component. She was also an alcoholic, although I think she's been in AA for many years now. She was a beautiful young girl, but I haven't seen her for years.

She had a son who shot himself in the head at the age of 19. And I had seen him very shortly before that. He was also tall and beautiful.

Do you think there is a genetic component?

@sissy2 Tree - I really do - I think my mother was bipolar, as well as one of my daughters. My sister's daughter also has problems which we think could be bipolar.

Re: Aliens, etc.

LilacTree — Sat, 25 Jun 2016 17:25:14 GMT

@Moonchilde wrote:
Honestly, I would let Younger Brother do what he wants to do about the situation, BUT -

If he continues to get more and more aggressive to others & turns violent, calling the police out & making them aware would be Step One. If he threatens anyone, especially someone *outside* the family or household, chances are better he could be put on a 48 hr hold in a Psych ward/hospital and be psychologically evaluated - and maybe gotten out of the home permanently that way.

It's very difficult to get someone like this out of a home where they have been living. He isn't going to change, or cooperate, only get worse to the point your other brother will be living in fear of even going to sleep at night. This has the potential to be something seen on the evening news. IMO thinking this kind of thing can be "managed", especially when all concerned are seniors, is dangerous. Not trying to be mean or scary, but I sure wouldn't want to be in that situation.

I get what you're saying. I'll have another discussion with my younger brother. I worry about guns in the house. They go "skeet shooting" together occasionally.

[And please let's not let this get into a "gun" discussion, which is not my objective.]

Re: Aliens, etc.

LilacTree — Sat, 25 Jun 2016 17:39:19 GMT

@hoosieroriginal wrote:
@LilacTree wrote:
@hoosieroriginal wrote:
Sometimes you do have to just let it go. My sister was bipolar and was so hard to deal with. After years of trying, I finally gave up and cut her off. She died at age 58 and I know she is in a better place. She was angry her entire life, yelling, screaming, throwing fits, or would call you and not say a word after "hello". Mental illness is reallly sad.
@hoosieroriginal
That is so sad. My former best friend had an adopted daughter who was bipolar (or whatever it's called these days). I think there's a genetic component. She was also an alcoholic, although I think she's been in AA for many years now. She was a beautiful young girl, but I haven't seen her for years.

She had a son who shot himself in the head at the age of 19. And I had seen him very shortly before that. He was also tall and beautiful.

Do you think there is a genetic component?
@sissy2 Tree - I really do - I think my mother was bipolar, as well as one of my daughters. My sister's daughter also has problems which we think could be bipolar.

@hoosieroriginal

Oh my, that is so sad. It's bad enough when it's a physical illness, but when it's mental, it's so much sadder because the victim can't help it, they just don't have control over their lives. And it's so hard on those who love them too.

I have to say my brother (the one with the problems) has always been somewhat strange. I used to think he was just "dumb," but perhaps it's been more than that all of these years. He did get into the Navy though.

Re: Aliens, etc.

hoosieroriginal — Sat, 25 Jun 2016 17:59:20 GMT

@LilacTree wrote:
@hoosieroriginal wrote:
@LilacTree wrote:
@hoosieroriginal wrote:
Sometimes you do have to just let it go. My sister was bipolar and was so hard to deal with. After years of trying, I finally gave up and cut her off. She died at age 58 and I know she is in a better place. She was angry her entire life, yelling, screaming, throwing fits, or would call you and not say a word after "hello". Mental illness is reallly sad.
@hoosieroriginal
That is so sad. My former best friend had an adopted daughter who was bipolar (or whatever it's called these days). I think there's a genetic component. She was also an alcoholic, although I think she's been in AA for many years now. She was a beautiful young girl, but I haven't seen her for years.

She had a son who shot himself in the head at the age of 19. And I had seen him very shortly before that. He was also tall and beautiful.

Do you think there is a genetic component?
@sissy2 Tree - I really do - I think my mother was bipolar, as well as one of my daughters. My sister's daughter also has problems which we think could be bipolar.
@hoosieroriginal
Oh my, that is so sad. It's bad enough when it's a physical illness, but when it's mental, it's so much sadder because the victim can't help it, they just don't have control over their lives. And it's so hard on those who love them too.

I have to say my brother (the one with the problems) has always been somewhat strange. I used to think he was just "dumb," but perhaps it's been more than that all of these years. He did get into the Navy though.

@sissy2 Tree - I remember my sister standing across a lake and my mother saying "I'm so worried about that child, she's so odd". Course, I remember my husband saying something similar about our daughter "There's something that's just not right". I think it appears early - my sister was awkwardly unsocial and so was my daughter.

Re: Aliens, etc.

LilacTree — Sat, 25 Jun 2016 18:14:12 GMT

@hoosieroriginal wrote:
@LilacTree wrote:
@hoosieroriginal wrote:
@LilacTree wrote:
@hoosieroriginal wrote:
Sometimes you do have to just let it go. My sister was bipolar and was so hard to deal with. After years of trying, I finally gave up and cut her off. She died at age 58 and I know she is in a better place. She was angry her entire life, yelling, screaming, throwing fits, or would call you and not say a word after "hello". Mental illness is reallly sad.
@hoosieroriginal
That is so sad. My former best friend had an adopted daughter who was bipolar (or whatever it's called these days). I think there's a genetic component. She was also an alcoholic, although I think she's been in AA for many years now. She was a beautiful young girl, but I haven't seen her for years.

She had a son who shot himself in the head at the age of 19. And I had seen him very shortly before that. He was also tall and beautiful.

Do you think there is a genetic component?
@sissy2 Tree - I really do - I think my mother was bipolar, as well as one of my daughters. My sister's daughter also has problems which we think could be bipolar.
@hoosieroriginal
Oh my, that is so sad. It's bad enough when it's a physical illness, but when it's mental, it's so much sadder because the victim can't help it, they just don't have control over their lives. And it's so hard on those who love them too.

I have to say my brother (the one with the problems) has always been somewhat strange. I used to think he was just "dumb," but perhaps it's been more than that all of these years. He did get into the Navy though.
@sissy2 Tree - I remember my sister standing across a lake and my mother saying "I'm so worried about that child, she's so odd". Course, I remember my husband saying something similar about our daughter "There's something that's just not right". I think it appears early - my sister was awkwardly unsocial and so was my daughter.

@hoosieroriginal

My heart goes out to all of you.