topic borderline personality disorder in Wellness

borderline personality disorder

panda1234 — Mon, 11 Apr 2016 11:44:54 GMT

My 20 year old daughter was just diagnosed. It has taken many years, she has been going to the psychiatrist since she was 5. This is sooo hard to live with for all of us especially her.I know this is hard to treat with a high suicide rate, she started DBT therapy 2 months ago. Just reaching out to see if anyone has experience with this disorder.

Re: borderline personality disorder

bonnielu — Mon, 11 Apr 2016 11:52:35 GMT

Family member experience. As long as she has help, medicine, she has a good chance of being okay.

It is hard on the family. Be there for her. Been there, done that and at the end of the day you have to know you have done everything in your power to help.

Prayers and good wishes to you and your family ------

Re: borderline personality disorder

on the bay — Mon, 11 Apr 2016 11:54:10 GMT

Yes a family member.

But you know what I find strange? Ours was well into the twenties before this diagnosis. But all before it was ADD.

I'm wondering if this "borderline personality disorder" is the new favorite lump it all into this diagnosis thing.

Sorry to sound so skeptical but I remember thinking at the time-that doesn't sound right (I of course read all I could about it) but what do I know?

Only that we have lived with it for over twenty years.

If possible, I would get a second opinion.

How did you feel about this? And was she diagnosed with something else before this since she was seeing a pyschiatrist since 5? (and ours had problems starting then or before too!)

Re: borderline personality disorder

bonnielu — Mon, 11 Apr 2016 12:09:56 GMT

Yes, it started with a diagnosis of ADD which went to bi-polar. Seems they don't get it right from the get go. (family members (2)

I do have a rant. If a person would fall off a roof and break every bone in their body they would get all kinds of help, support and whatever. But a mental illness... hands off... must be something wrong with them. Stay back... whoa.... stigma city.

Okay to be sick but not mentally sick. As for me I am a free spirit and was once told by my doctor that I had two choices... live with who I am, anxiety and all or he could medicate me the rest of my life... and I would never be who I was supposed to be and never know the difference. I chose to BE ME and let ME do what I could do to Pay it Forward. That was over 50 years ago. Doing just fine.

Re: borderline personality disorder

panda1234 — Mon, 11 Apr 2016 12:18:13 GMT

@bonnielu wrote:
Yes, it started with a diagnosis of ADD which went to bi-polar. Seems they don't get it right from the get go. (family members (2)

I do have a rant. If a person would fall off a roof and break every bone in their body they would get all kinds of help, support and whatever. But a mental illness... hands off... must be something wrong with them. Stay back... whoa.... stigma city.

Okay to be sick but not mentally sick. As for me I am a free spirit and was once told by my doctor that I had two choices... live with who I am, anxiety and all or he could medicate me the rest of my life... and I would never be who I was supposed to be and never know the difference. I chose to BE ME and let ME do what I could do to Pay it Forward. That was over 50 years ago. Doing just fine.

Our culture does not put much value or money when it comes to mental illness. Glad to hear you are doing well...gives me hope.

Re: borderline personality disorder

panda1234 — Mon, 11 Apr 2016 12:27:35 GMT

@on the bay wrote:
Yes a family member.
But you know what I find strange? Ours was well into the twenties before this diagnosis. But all before it was ADD.
I'm wondering if this "borderline personality disorder" is the new favorite lump it all into this diagnosis thing.
Sorry to sound so skeptical but I remember thinking at the time-that doesn't sound right (I of course read all I could about it) but what do I know?
Only that we have lived with it for over twenty years.
If possible, I would get a second opinion.
How did you feel about this? And was she diagnosed with something else before this since she was seeing a pyschiatrist since 5? (and ours had problems starting then or before too!)

Her doctor she has had from day one did not want to put this label on her, it can look like alot of different things. As a baby she could never self sooth and as a 20 year old she still can not. We have to lay down in bed most nights to get her calmed down, she will usually fall asleep by 3. She is on meds for sleep, depression, mood and thyroid. She is not capable of working or going to school and no friends.

Re: borderline personality disorder

panda1234 — Mon, 11 Apr 2016 12:30:28 GMT

@bonnielu wrote:
Family member experience. As long as she has help, medicine, she has a good chance of being okay.

It is hard on the family. Be there for her. Been there, done that and at the end of the day you have to know you have done everything in your power to help.

Prayers and good wishes to you and your family ------

Yes, the only peace we will ever have is knowing we have done everything possible. It is a financial struggle but we are doing it for her.

Re: borderline personality disorder

LonestarBabs — Mon, 11 Apr 2016 13:27:54 GMT

My ex-husband had this, although he refused to admit it and get help. I did all the research, learned as much as I could, and gave him a big notebook full of information so he could see I wasn't just picking on him. Tried to be supportive but the roller coaster wore me out and I finally filed for divorce. I don't think he ever received treatment, which is a shame because the quality of his life -- and those around him -- could have been so much better.

Meds and proper treatment can really help, so I applaud your efforts to support your daughter.

Re: borderline personality disorder

hckynut — Mon, 11 Apr 2016 16:03:02 GMT

I don't understand the use of the word "borderline" when it comes to, what I assume, is some form of psychiatric condition?

I have been diagnosed with Panic/Anxiety Disorder and Clinical Depression. Those terms I understand and will be working to contain every day remaining in my life.

Borderline, the word, I know the definition. Now i know what "borderline hypertension" means because that is based on numbers. I also understand "borderline CHF", as that too is based on the numerical functioning of the heart.

During my 7+ days in a mental Ward with several classes every day, I never heard any of the doctors, who were mostly Psychiatrists, use the word borderline anything.

What I heard was you are, or you are not. Never heard of Borderline Bi-Polar or Borderline-Depression. Got me wondering just exactly what that word means when used as "Borderline Personality Disorder".

hckynut(john)

Re: borderline personality disorder

CatsyCline — Mon, 11 Apr 2016 16:07:50 GMT

my extended family member has seen therapists and BPD was mentioned. since birth she has always had mega melt-downs and is controlling . jealous . she cannot self-soothe and obsesses with people. BF broke up with her due to her needines. everyone has to walk on eggshells around her . i haven't been to visit there in a few years now because the last time i was there she went off on me for spilling a small cup of water. that was not the only thing, she got into a blow out with her mother and i was dragged into it. she was still in HS at the time and basically ruled the roost. a lot of denial going on. she self medicates with substances. . she has a revolving door of friendships . no one can be around her for very long becuase she has an intense fear of abandonment.

1991 book " I Hate You Don't Leave Me " is a good resource to start with. there are many books on the topic

Re: borderline personality disorder

CatsyCline — Mon, 11 Apr 2016 16:14:39 GMT

hi @hckynut

Borderline Personality Disorder is a separate Dx

these are just several characteristics - from DSM-IV-TR

Extreme reactions—including panic, depression, rage, or frantic actions—to abandonment, whether real or perceived
A pattern of intense and stormy relationships with family, friends, and loved ones, often veering from extreme closeness and love (idealization) to extreme dislike or anger (devaluation)
Distorted and unstable self-image or sense of self, which can result in sudden changes in feelings, opinions, values, or plans and goals for the future (such as school or career choices)

http://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/borderline-personality-disorder/index.shtml

Re: borderline personality disorder

hckynut — Mon, 11 Apr 2016 17:32:54 GMT

Thank you @CatsyCline for this info. I still am not sure why the word "borderline" needs to be used. To me it comes across as "you might be" as opposed to anything definitive.

As I stated in my other post, I under stand "borderline diabetic" because it relates to numbers that are specific, just like the other examples I gave in my other post.

I know if any of my many doctors used that word in my diagnosis, I would want him to show me numbers/stats or something other than what I hear him say as, "you might have xyz".

Kinda reminds me of people using the term " walking pneumonia"! Say what?

Thanks for the info you provided, in appreciate it. Next time I visit my shrink, I am going to pose my question to her and see if she has ever used the word "borderline" in any of her diagnosis.

hckynut(john)

Re: borderline personality disorder

fortune — Mon, 11 Apr 2016 19:11:21 GMT

@ashleigh dupray wrote:
hi @hckynut

Borderline Personality Disorder is a separate Dx

these are just several characteristics - from DSM-IV-TR

Extreme reactions—including panic, depression, rage, or frantic actions—to abandonment, whether real or perceived
A pattern of intense and stormy relationships with family, friends, and loved ones, often veering from extreme closeness and love (idealization) to extreme dislike or anger (devaluation)
Distorted and unstable self-image or sense of self, which can result in sudden changes in feelings, opinions, values, or plans and goals for the future (such as school or career choices)

http://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/borderline-personality-disorder/index.shtml

I'm wondering what the difference is between BPD and bipolar personality.

Re: borderline personality disorder

Stormygirl — Mon, 11 Apr 2016 21:55:05 GMT

I had several siblings with BPD.....is one of the hardest mental illnesses to treat and in their case (and many) is often draining, both emotionally and physically. One would want to confirm that this diagnosis is correct as it is one of the hardest to treat. My relationship with those siblings eventually became non-existent as they often drive others away with their extreme reactions which became so toxic to the rest of us.. Is way harder to treat and more devastating then Bipolar Disorder and others due to its high rate of refraction to all known treatments. In my siblings case, 5 out of 11 of them had this illness. I and 6 others luckily escaped it. Suicide took several of my siblings in adulthood unfortunately. (was 20 years ago though and times were way different) Hopefully there is better treatment today but I don't know how much progress has been made with BPD. I would want a second opinion to confirm this devastating mental illness. Is hard to diagnose as oftentimes the symptoms overlap. Hugs to you.

Re: borderline personality disorder

KarenQVC — Mon, 11 Apr 2016 22:44:27 GMT

It has the name because until some time back psychiatrists thought of it as a bunch of symptoms that were atypical or borderline symptoms a a bunch of other diseases. Now it is diagnosed as one specific personality disorder.

Re: borderline personality disorder

CatsyCline — Mon, 11 Apr 2016 23:00:15 GMT

Borderline Personality got its moniker early on because its symptoms mimicked schizo affective disorders, psychoses, and neuroses . it was all dumped into a "wastebasket " diagnoses.

BPD, unless diagnosed co-morbid with depression or moodswing, does not typically respond to mood stabilizers because it is not a disorder of mood. it falls under Cluster B "Dramatic" Personality Disorders, alsong with Antisocial, Histrionic and Narcissistic.

Bi Polar Disorder is a chemical imbalance of neurotransmitters responsible for mood regulation. They are known as BSD - Bi Polar Spectrum disorders

Re: borderline personality disorder

YorkieonmyPillow — Mon, 11 Apr 2016 23:00:27 GMT

It's been theorized that Borderline PD is what was afflicting Princess Diana....

Re: borderline personality disorder

panda1234 — Tue, 12 Apr 2016 01:27:00 GMT

@LonestarBabs wrote:
My ex-husband had this, although he refused to admit it and get help. I did all the research, learned as much as I could, and gave him a big notebook full of information so he could see I wasn't just picking on him. Tried to be supportive but the roller coaster wore me out and I finally filed for divorce. I don't think he ever received treatment, which is a shame because the quality of his life -- and those around him -- could have been so much better.

Meds and proper treatment can really help, so I applaud your efforts to support your daughter.

I do feel worn out, but can't divorce her.....just kidding. I am her caregiver, she depends on me for everything. I am easy going and our home is a calm environment which I know is important. Thank you for your words of encouragement.

Re: borderline personality disorder

panda1234 — Tue, 12 Apr 2016 01:32:10 GMT

@ashleigh dupray wrote:
Borderline Personality got its moniker early on because its symptoms mimicked schizo affective disorders, psychoses, and neuroses . it was all dumped into a "wastebasket " diagnoses.

BPD, unless diagnosed co-morbid with depression or moodswing, does not typically respond to mood stabilizers because it is not a disorder of mood. it falls under Cluster B "Dramatic" Personality Disorders, alsong with Antisocial, Histrionic and Narcissistic.

Bi Polar Disorder is a chemical imbalance of neurotransmitters responsible for mood regulation. They are known as BSD - Bi Polar Spectrum disorders

Thank you for the info. You explained why the mood stabilizers are not working. I appreciate your input.

Re: borderline personality disorder

panda1234 — Tue, 12 Apr 2016 01:39:53 GMT

@Stormygirl wrote:
I had several siblings with BPD.....is one of the hardest mental illnesses to treat and in their case (and many) is often draining, both emotionally and physically. One would want to confirm that this diagnosis is correct as it is one of the hardest to treat. My relationship with those siblings eventually became non-existent as they often drive others away with their extreme reactions which became so toxic to the rest of us.. Is way harder to treat and more devastating then Bipolar Disorder and others due to its high rate of refraction to all known treatments. In my siblings case, 5 out of 11 of them had this illness. I and 6 others luckily escaped it. Suicide took several of my siblings in adulthood unfortunately. (was 20 years ago though and times were way different) Hopefully there is better treatment today but I don't know how much progress has been made with BPD. I would want a second opinion to confirm this devastating mental illness. Is hard to diagnose as oftentimes the symptoms overlap. Hugs to you.

I can not even think about living with five people in the same house who have this disorder! How did you do it? Your story is very sad. As a child you lived in a toxic environment, hope you are OK today. Thanks for sharing.