topic Re: KonMari (decluttering method) - questions in Home

KonMari (decluttering method) - questions

Julie_23 — Tue, 13 Jun 2017 08:42:11 GMT

If anyone is familiar with this method, will you please share your best tip? (Perhaps the suggestion of hers that really clicked with you and you found the most helpful.)

For instance, mine would be this: with regards to 'clothes' -- I find those emotionally charged so I would recommend starting first with, say, towels or socks (as the 'clothes').

And, too, is there a specific youtuber you found helpful?

Re: KonMari (decluttering method) - questions

gidgetgh — Tue, 13 Jun 2017 19:39:44 GMT

@Julie_23- I'm very familiar with this. I discovered her book fairly late in my decluttering phase but was pleased to discover that while I had done most on my own, I really was kind of following her path. I used many of her storage ideas.

First, I'm not emotionally attached to many "things" so it's easier for me to donate things than it might be for someone else.

I did my decluttering by room which is certainly not what Marie Kondo suggests. But again, I found her book late. And I'm perfectly happy with how I did it.

There is certainly good reasoning for her method. You start with the things that tend to be the least emotionally charged items so they should be easier and then move toward more difficult items like pictures, family items, etc.

I think you mentioned clothes. You have to take an honest look at every single item. Do you like it? Do you wear it? Does it fit? And finally, going strictly with her method, does it bring you joy?

I follow the "does it bring you joy" thing pretty religiously. But again, I'm an easy purger.

If it's difficult for you to part with items, ANY items, you might need to do some soul searching to figure out why. I can't really help with that part because it's personal for each person. But I'm happy to support you.

With her method, you need to reach your "click point" for the items in each category. For example, an easy one. I had too many rubber spatulas. Small large, plain and with cute pictures on the (reindeer, Christmas tree, etc). Now, I don't cook much. So when it was kitchen utensil time I put them all on the counter and picked up each and took a good look and decided that I should keep 3. That was my click point. So I picked the three I liked best and gave the others away. I've since donated another one.

Another item I had way too much of was socks. So I was ruthless with those.

Again, I incorporated many of her ideas on storage, but not all. I'm a very organized person by nature so getting even more organized was fun for me. I have my closet set up mostly from the method.

I'm happy to answer any questions for you. You have to be in the right mind frame to do this. It's like losing weight. If one is ready to lose weight then they will. If they're not, they probably won't.

I wish you you the best of luck. Happy to support you in this.

Re: KonMari (decluttering method) - questions

Julie_23 — Tue, 13 Jun 2017 09:08:22 GMT

For some reason I couldn't edit my original post. I was going to add if there was a specifc benefit you'd like to share as well.

Thanks!

Re: KonMari (decluttering method) - questions

Julie_23 — Tue, 13 Jun 2017 09:47:19 GMT

Hi, @gidgetgh -- thanks so much for your reply. I'm definitely the opposite in that I tend to hold onto things and am not very organized! At the moment, anyway.

Other times in the past that I have de-cluttered, it wasn't the KonMari method so I am hoping to have continued success with this (vs. on/off). Though, I know it's a continual process.

You made so many good points, by the way. Mindset being one of them. The desire/want and need/necessity to do so are both there; but, I still struggle with letting things go. Even if they don't bring joy. I'm not sure why that is. I will certainly keep in mind what you said about soul-searching.

Is there anything in particular you recommend to help in getting in/staying in the right mindset? I tend to get stuck in my head sometimes and be overly sentimental about things (ie, not only sentimental about an item but the box the item came in as well).

Thanks again for your reply. I'm definitely more of a beginner in this and what you wrote really helped.

Re: KonMari (decluttering method) - questions

Mom2Dogs — Tue, 13 Jun 2017 11:20:23 GMT

I am pretty orgnaized by nature.....and I have decluttered my home, it took a while ( I am not familiar with the KonMari method). I went room by room and cleaned out every drawer, closet, etc in each room.

I donated some things and also had a garage sale with a neighbor. It took a couple of years to totally clean out what I did not want or no longer needed. My goal was to clean out because I wanted to put our home on the market, which we did, sadly the house did not sell but I was left with a very clean, organized home.

It was fun for me as I like to keep things neat and tidy and so it was not a chore.....good luck on your decuttering, you will be happy once it is done!

Re: KonMari (decluttering method) - questions

on the bay — Tue, 13 Jun 2017 11:35:04 GMT

I have heard of the "if it doesn't give you "joy" get rid of it method but didn't know this was the book it was based on.

One thing I noticed about stressing out about de-cluttering is some people get so stressed out about thinking about how they should de-clutter, they just keep stressing out and not doing anything about it and then feeling guilty about not doing anything about it.

I read a lot of the negative comments about her book on Amazon.

My recommendation would be to start there. It helps with going into it all with a sense of humor and really adjusting any methods to what makes de-cluttering enjoyable for you.

You could even start your own enjoyable method, including "tomorrow is another day" or forgeddaboudit! until you really feel like you have time, energy, and desire to do it, even if just a tiny bit at a time.

And really, some people, (and I include myself) love to organize, and others really hate it.

For those, I think getting someone to give moral support, ideas or suggestions helps. Like having a good friend going thru things with you that we can't see objectively-then you decide.

One way I decide about things that are really hard to decide about is this-I pretend I'm getting rid of it one way or another-in my mind as soon as its gone and leaves the door, do I regret that?, feel sad? will I keep thinking about it?

Sometimes I"ll put it back and give more time to think about it. If I keep being annoyed by not being able to decide because I really don't like it that much, then I can happily get rid of it.

Sometimes I may feel bad about getting rid of something someone gave me-I may love them but not the object. But I can't keep everything that was ever given to me that I don't like. I may keep it for awhile and then find another home, while always appreciating (really!) the thought in which it was given.

Anyway, by this time you can probably see that you are not the only one who thinks about this a lot-we all have our own methods and styles and thats okay-I think taking what helps from a book and discarding what doesn't is a good way to go.

Re: KonMari (decluttering method) - questions

LinaL — Tue, 13 Jun 2017 11:54:08 GMT

@Julie_23

"...will you please share your best tip?"

Follow the book to the letter for the big "clean".

Even the seemingly stupid stuff about thanking your objects. It has a purpose, even for those of us who don't anthropomorphize objects.

As for " maintenence", I don't empty my bag every night. But, I do put other things (especially clothes) back more often than I used to.

Her method is so simple and so genius. It worked for me and everyone I know (quite a few people) who did it faithfully. You just can't do it partially, though. You have to do everything she says.

It's been several years and I've never relapsed. There's nothing to relapse to.

The folding of clothes (all items) is brilliant.

Re: KonMari (decluttering method) - questions

ceekay — Tue, 13 Jun 2017 12:47:24 GMT

There used to be a show (maybe on TLC?) called "Clean Sweep" and their organizer was a guy named Peter Walsh. He has a book on organizing I got from the library. I have also read the KonMari book. Along the lines of "does it bring you joy" his question was always "is it the item or the memory?". If it is the memory, take a picture and move on without the item. Interesting way to look at things and it helped a lot when we helped my mom move out of her house into an apartment (after 45 years in th house). I try to apply both concepts to organizing. But, not quite ready to let go yet... I did try her clothes folding method. Does seem to take up less space.

Good luck - no real tips for you but I know a number of people who follow the KonMari method successfully.

Re: KonMari (decluttering method) - questions

forest4thetrees — Tue, 13 Jun 2017 13:02:52 GMT

@Julie_23

First; remember KM's ideas are a "lifestyle" not just a day. So don't feel you have to do everything in just one day or one week. I find breaking it down helps. Like, ok next is the pantry, next is the lower kitchen cupboards, bathroom linen closet, etc. I put off the master closet until the very very end because I knew it was my mulligan and if I started there then I'd never get anything else anywhere else done.

A tip I found that really helped me.......... there were many items/mementos/things that I was having a LOT of trouble letting go of. So, if I was really torn about something, I'd box it up (putting a label on the outside what was in the box) and then stash the box somewhere out of sight. If a month went by (or longer) and I forgot about the box and forgot about the "thing" in the box, and didn't even look for/need the "thing" in the box then when I did come across the box/thing again I was able to laugh and let it go because, obviously, it was meant to be with someone else to love since I didn't even miss the thing being not in my daily life..

Another tip I found that really helped me in the dreaded master closet....... after removing the first round of things that no longer fit/looked right there was still waaaayyyy too much stuff!!! So for the second round, each time I wore something I put it back with the hanger hooked backwards (tip facing out). The rule is that once the hanger is backwards you have to choose something with a hanger facing inwards (tip facing the wall). When you get to the point that you absolutely don't WANT to reach for any of the "tip facing in" items well then it's a snap to realize that you don't need/want those items and so easy to let them move on.

Re: KonMari (decluttering method) - questions

house_cat — Tue, 13 Jun 2017 14:37:11 GMT

I think I've read every book written about organizing and decluttering. I hate clutter and love purging, so much so that I've been known to get rid of things I actually should have saved.

My husband, on the other hand, has pack-rat tendencies. The best way I've found to deal with it is to gather up those things I think he should part with and put them in a bag or box in the garage. If he hasn't asked about them by the next time I clean the garage (usually yearly), they are donated. This method has never backfired. In 35 years he has never once asked about anything I've gotten rid of - it's just hard for him to make that decision himself. He knows it's happening - we choose not to discuss it, lol.

If that's the book I think it is, she advocates for rolling items instead of folding them. I find this to be a great method for many things. My dish towels and other table linens are organized this way and it works very well.

However, I can't quite bring myself to roll my clothes. I discovered the Japanese folding method some years ago on YouTube and it's the one I use most.

Click here if you want to see an easy demo of it.

I've been cat sitting for a friend this week - she's a single woman, 46 years old. She's very stylish and her home is beautiful. I was struck, though, by how much stuff she has in that house that is purely decorative and not functional. I have a small home and I keep only those things that are truly sentimental or functional in some way. I have no room in my home or heart for knick-knacks and dust collectors.

Re: KonMari (decluttering method) - questions

Mominohio — Tue, 13 Jun 2017 15:30:37 GMT

I haven't read the book, but have heard it discussed here many times.

One thing I have done, which may or may not be part of her methods, is to Pre determine a certain location and amount of space I will dedicate to something. When that space is full (hopefully just comfortably full and not jammed), I have to let the rest of that item go.

So,for example, if I'm tackling kitchen utensils, I might decide that the only space I'm going to dedicate to them is the utensil crock on the counter and one small drawer.

Next I will look at all my utensils laid out and try to realistically determine how many of each type of item I really use. I might find I have way more wooden spoons than spatulas, but in reality I use the few spatulas much more . I can then let go of those things that I realize I don't use.

Sometimes I think many of us keep too many things because we come from a place of having little or were raised or influenced by people who came from that. Seeing everything you own of a particular category all spread out in one place can really put into perspective how out of control our consuming has been. When you have some of your like items stored in the kitchen, some in the dining room hutch, some in the basement and a few in some boxes in the garage, you can really not fully comprehend all of that item you have.

Re: KonMari (decluttering method) - questions

Mominohio — Tue, 13 Jun 2017 15:39:22 GMT

Also, to help with givin things up you want to keep for sentimental reasons, it can help to try to move some of those things on to friends and family so they aren't really gone.

For example give the kids a lot of Christmas ornaments for their home as a reminder of their childhood. Pass on a few of great grandma's teapots you inherited to some cousins or nieces who will treasure them.

If all else fails know that even donating to the local thrifts will make someone excited to have what was cluttering and complicating your life. Might make it a little easier to let go of some things.

Re: KonMari (decluttering method) - questions

Still Raining — Tue, 13 Jun 2017 15:45:36 GMT

It may sound silly but her suggestion that we honor the discards by thanking them gives some relief. Blessings to memories.

Re: KonMari (decluttering method) - questions

151949 — Tue, 13 Jun 2017 18:16:17 GMT

When I was younger - pre back issues and arthritis - I used to spring houseclean. Everything you can imagine was scrubbed or laundered and every cupboard, drawer, nook, shelf and cabinet was totally cleaned out and decluttered. Fortunately, every spring my DH (the hoarder) had to go to a 9 day convention out of town so that was my opportunity to really get something done. I even washed every wall in my house. I only had those 9 days so I had to be very organized and I would set goals for each day and - even if I was still cleaning late into the night - I never stopped until I reached the goal.

I would be so exhausted when it was done but it was also so worth while.The whole house would be so clean, and when you walked in from outside the house smelled so fresh. Now that I can no longer clean like this I do the best I am able - but it's not the same.

Re: KonMari (decluttering method) - questions

gidgetgh — Tue, 13 Jun 2017 20:05:50 GMT

@Julie_23 wrote:

Hi, @gidgetgh -- thanks so much for your reply. I'm definitely the opposite in that I tend to hold onto things and am not very organized! At the moment, anyway.

Other times in the past that I have de-cluttered, it wasn't the KonMari method so I am hoping to have continued success with this (vs. on/off). Though, I know it's a continual process.

You made so many good points, by the way. Mindset being one of them. The desire/want and need/necessity to do so are both there; but, I still struggle with letting things go. Even if they don't bring joy. I'm not sure why that is. I will certainly keep in mind what you said about soul-searching.

Is there anything in particular you recommend to help in getting in/staying in the right mindset? I tend to get stuck in my head sometimes and be overly sentimental about things (ie, not only sentimental about an item but the box the item came in as well).

Thanks again for your reply. I'm definitely more of a beginner in this and what you wrote really helped.

@Julie_23- I really wish I had some wise words for you on how to let go of things, but I don't. I'm emotionally attached to some things and I would never, ever, ever get rid of them. Some of them are trivial. An example....my mom loved to to go the casinos in Mississippi and Atlantic City. We live in Atlanta so trips were infrequent. She had a little white envelope ( the kind the bank gives you when they give you cash. Just a plain envelope). She had written some figures on it, keeping track of her money. When she passed away, I got the envelope and divided the cash that was in it between my dad, sister and me as she'd asked. And what did I want? I wanted the envelope. She passed away over 6 years ago and I still have that envelope and will never get rid of it. My mom's family was very poor. And that envelope with her little gambling money just represented a lot of different things for me. So I kept it.

But, just speaking for me, I don't think it's right (again for me) to assign that level of importance and attachment to everything. I don't want all that "stuff" in our house. I have no children. When I pass away I don't want my niece and nephews to be overwhelmed by all my belongings.

One thing I've done on a few things that has worked is to take a picture of an item that I don't necessarily want to keep but have some attachment to. I just take a picture with my phone and when I scroll through my pictures on the phone, there it is. That seems to be enough for me in many cases. I still have the memory. That will never be gone. But I don't have the clutter.

What keeps me in the right mind set is that I just love how our house looks. We have lots of stuff still. Our house is very comfortable. But every closet and drawer isn't bursting at the seams with clutter. I know where everything is and that's my click point. It's just how I'm wired.

If you're on Facebook, let me know and I'll give you the name of a great Konmari page. Lots of before and after pictures. You have the power in you to do this. You just have to want it.

Re: KonMari (decluttering method) - questions

gidgetgh — Tue, 13 Jun 2017 20:06:55 GMT

@LinaL wrote:
@Julie_23
"...will you please share your best tip?"
Follow the book to the letter for the big "clean".
Even the seemingly stupid stuff about thanking your objects. It has a purpose, even for those of us who don't anthropomorphize objects.
As for " maintenence", I don't empty my bag every night. But, I do put other things (especially clothes) back more often than I used to.
Her method is so simple and so genius. It worked for me and everyone I know (quite a few people) who did it faithfully. You just can't do it partially, though. You have to do everything she says.
It's been several years and I've never relapsed. There's nothing to relapse to.
The folding of clothes (all items) is brilliant.

@LinaL- I loved your post. I also thank my things as I donate them. It felt a Little weird at first, but now it comes naturally.

Last year, when we sold my parents house, a few months before my dad died, the day before the closing I walked through each room by myself and I took a picture and thanked the room (out loud) for the joy it had brought my family.

And, like you, I don't clean my purse out every night. No way. Waste of time.

I love how she tells you to fold, organize the closet.

And I agree. Her method is simple and genius.

Re: KonMari (decluttering method) - questions

software — Tue, 13 Jun 2017 20:38:25 GMT

@ceekay wrote:
There used to be a show (maybe on TLC?) called "Clean Sweep" and their organizer was a guy named Peter Walsh. He has a book on organizing I got from the library. I have also read the KonMari book. Along the lines of "does it bring you joy" his question was always "is it the item or the memory?". If it is the memory, take a picture and move on without the item. Interesting way to look at things and it helped a lot when we helped my mom move out of her house into an apartment (after 45 years in th house). I try to apply both concepts to organizing. But, not quite ready to let go yet... I did try her clothes folding method. Does seem to take up less space.

Good luck - no real tips for you but I know a number of people who follow the KonMari method successfully.

This ^^

But then you have to organize the pictures!!

Leave them on a memory card, or print them & make a collage for your wall or burn them to a disk. My parents passed within a few weeks of each other & they had previously been living together at home.....a big home! So glad they weren't pack rats but there was still a lot of STUFF to handle. I had to take pictures, there was no way I could keep a lot of it.

It's things.

You can't take it with you.

@Julie_23

Re: KonMari (decluttering method) - questions

Julie_23 — Wed, 14 Jun 2017 06:06:13 GMT

Wow, I was completey blown away by everyone's thoughtful replies. Thank you, thank you. I cannot say enough how much I appreciate all of your input.

(@gidgetgh -- I'm not on facebook, but I took your insights to heart and will give this de-cluttering a go. Thank you again!)

Much appreciation to you all.

Re: KonMari (decluttering method) - questions

gidgetgh — Wed, 14 Jun 2017 10:35:54 GMT

@Julie_23- as the book says, hold each item in your hand. Give thought to each item as to why you'd want to keep it. Say it out loud if you have to. Line those spatulas up on the counter like I did and give an honest look.

Best of luck to you and please check back.

Re: KonMari (decluttering method) - questions

mousiegirl — Wed, 14 Jun 2017 15:36:57 GMT

@Julie_23 wrote:

If anyone is familiar with this method, will you please share your best tip? (Perhaps the suggestion of hers that really clicked with you and you found the most helpful.)

For instance, mine would be this: with regards to 'clothes' -- I find those emotionally charged so I would recommend starting first with, say, towels or socks (as the 'clothes').

And, too, is there a specific youtuber you found helpful?

@Julie_23 I also have a difficult time giving anything away, but due to lack of space, I have been doing this all year, and am ready for a truck to pick it all up. I began because I was running out of room for just about everything. I was shocked at just how many clothes I had of DD's from when she was little, and how many I had. I ended up with about twenty fifteen gallon bags of clothing, about the same in books, shoes, candles,. and misc. I always thought I would sell the clothing on ebay, but right now, given the price of what things are selling for, it wasn't worth the trouble.

Around here, I have discovered, most won't pick up unless there is furniture, very upsetting given the amount and value of what I have to donate. If we had to deliver, it would take a weekly drop off until it was gone, so hope it won't come to this.

I bought compressor bags from HSN, and stored all of DD's clothes that I couldn't part with, they all look brand new, so if she can't use them one day, she can dispose of them.