topic Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is in Kitchen

I Don't Know What My Problem Is

rms1954 — Mon, 12 Jan 2026 20:58:33 GMT

But I used to love planning and preparing events and having people over for various holidays and birthday celebration dinners and now I'm lucky enough if I even get dinner on the table. I just don't care anymore.

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is

Growing — Mon, 12 Jan 2026 21:39:26 GMT

My. mother used to say the same thing, she was tired of always cooking. And so am I. I rarely cook a big meal anymore and I find entertaining to be phyically difficult with my arthritis. I got tired of doing all the work and I think it is normal as we get older to maybe get tired of the old grind. I know some love ot entertain but honestly, it is a lot of work.

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is

ciao_bella — Tue, 03 Feb 2026 12:18:58 GMT

@rms1954 I used to enjoy entertaining and cooking for many friends and extended family, but that was then and this is now! I've always been a good cook, even won cooking contests in my younger days, but as we get older the luster and desire for 'entertaining' becomes very tiring and undesirable.

I do still cook because I have a daughter with disabilites who lives at home. My adult son lives nearby and often stops by to fix things or to say hello (probably checking in on us..lol) . But, as I've gotten older I look for easier meals to make. I often post recipes here like sheet pan recipes or easy soups/meals, etc. because it makes life a lot easier and more manageable now that we're older. Having said that, there are those 'days' when I'm not picking up a dish, pot or pan to cook. When that happens, I do the next best thing and call for take-out.

Don't beat yourself up for feeling that way. I just think it all sort of 'catches up with us' because we're so used to doing it for many years and we've now reached a point in our lives where we realize it's not nearly as important as it used to be. Add that in with the loss of a loved one and grief, and it's all understandable. Please try and seek help with grief counseling. Many places have it and it does help. I know that for a fact. It helped me.

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is

RedTop — Mon, 12 Jan 2026 22:52:51 GMT

@rms1954

Grief?

Since my husband passed a year ago this month, cooking has become far less important to me. There is plenty of food in this house, and I eat well every day, I just don't cook myself a meal every day. I do cook twice a week when the daughter who lives here is home.

After my husband passed, I used the entire first year to accept and adjust to my new reality. I had spent the last 13 years caring for my mother and my husband, I needed time to take care of me, and that was my focus all year.

I focused on making this first Christmas without my husband, a special one for our girls, no grief allowed. I cooked a nice meal for them and their boyfriends, which was even nicer than I hoped. Christmas was very nice and left all of us with happy memories.

2026 is starting off busy. I joined a very special group and am registered to attend the state conference, which I'm very excited about. I intend to make this another year of taking care of me!

I hope you figure out what you need to do for yourself, and do it!

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is

charsha — Mon, 12 Jan 2026 22:41:12 GMT

I ended up hosting 3 different Christmas dinners within 10 days. It took me days to recover from it all, and made me sad as I never had that issue in the past bouncing back. It is so much work prepping everything. Getting older sucks. But, I did enjoy the festivities!!

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is

Regal Bee — Mon, 12 Jan 2026 22:44:35 GMT

@rms1954 wrote:
But I used to love planning and preparing events and having people over for various holidays and birthday celebration dinners and now I'm lucky enough if I even get dinner on the table. I just don't care anymore.

@rms1954 You are entering a different 'season' of your life. It is okay...cut yourself some slack.

The exact same thing happened to me. I entertained all the time and had energy I couldn't believe...not now. You know what? It is okay. I am giving myself permission to be who I am now.

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is

Janey2 — Mon, 12 Jan 2026 23:01:20 GMT

I learned a new word a couple of years ago....caterer. I enjoy my company more and am not frazzled by the time they come.
@RedTop you sound like you have everything under control. Enjoy your new endeavors.

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is

NEvans2 — Mon, 12 Jan 2026 23:33:54 GMT

I can't say I don't care anymore, I just don't have the energy anymore. I hosted Christmas at my house fo 25 years. The last two years my sister had it. She was willing to have it again this year, but no one wanted drive the hour to her house. The solution I came up with didn't go over well with her branch of the family. Oh well!

I was really hoping by now that the next generation would take up the holidays, but I guess not.

At the age of almost 71 I just don't have the energy to have 30 people for Christmas dinner. Yes, everyone brings something. But lets face it, the majority of work is on the person that hosts.

Go Steelers!💛

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is

Roscoe the Rascal — Mon, 12 Jan 2026 23:47:09 GMT

I never liked entertaining a large crowd. Too much work before and after.

I was never a big cook and my husband did most of the cooking. I like creating simple meals. I'm lucky my daughter and her family live next door so when I feel like cooking I share and she does the same.

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is

on the bay — Mon, 12 Jan 2026 23:58:50 GMT

When the top of the microwave just flew off and fell on my arm I told my daughter that fortunately the microwave still works because if it didn't that would be an emergency lol!

I did use to make dinners and loved to give my kids and their friends birthday parties and I did bake a lot.

I just made corn muffins today like my grandmother made. I haven't baked anything in a hundred years. And even that was more work than I imagined. I'd rather clean. And I am sore. You know stirring and everything!

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is

Bonkers1 — Tue, 13 Jan 2026 00:41:20 GMT

I feel the same way as most of you. There was a time when I loved entertaining now not so much. I think age has a lot to do with it. For me it is a chore now and avoid it.

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is

Skyegirl21 — Tue, 13 Jan 2026 00:49:10 GMT

@rms1954 , I feel the same way... " Entertaining " is so overwhelming and exhausting . And I am so tired of cooking almost every day... Just totally lost my mojo! I cook as little as possible and as simply as possible!

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is

rms1954 — Tue, 13 Jan 2026 00:54:34 GMT

Most things I did enjoy just seem like a chore now. I don't find enjoyment in much of anything. Most days now I'm lucky if I get up, take a shower, and get dressed. That is so not me. I miss my son ... I ache inside and it won't stop. I wish I could be with him. There's nothing much to live for these days.

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is

Skyegirl21 — Tue, 13 Jan 2026 00:57:07 GMT

@Janey2 , talking about " catering"- Recently, I was at a small get-together and they got trays of food from a local eatery. It was fabulous! It was a chicken dish, very tender and tasty. So I thought about getting a small tray (8-10 people), and dividing it and freezing the portions for me and hubby! With grocery costs as they are, the tray of prepared food doesn't cost much more than me buying the groceries and doing all the work! Hmmmmm-

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is

rockygems123 — Tue, 13 Jan 2026 01:21:30 GMT

@Skyegirl21 wrote:
@Janey2 , talking about " catering"- Recently, I was at a small get-together and they got trays of food from a local eatery. It was fabulous! It was a chicken dish, very tender and tasty. So I thought about getting a small tray (8-10 people), and dividing it and freezing the portions for me and hubby! With grocery costs as they are, the tray of prepared food doesn't cost much more than me buying the groceries and doing all the work! Hmmmmm-

@Skyegirl21

That is a terrific idea! Thinking about all the local possibilities.

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is

rockygems123 — Tue, 13 Jan 2026 01:23:49 GMT

@rms1954 wrote:
Most things I did enjoy just seem like a chore now. I don't find enjoyment in much of anything. Most days now I'm lucky if I get up, take a shower, and get dressed. That is so not me. I miss my son ... I ache inside and it won't stop. I wish I could be with him. There's nothing much to live for these days.

@rms1954

If you ache inside and it won't go away you probably know that's grief and depression. There are probably grief groups in your area you may be surprised that you'll slowly feel better if you go.

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is

Etoile308 — Tue, 13 Jan 2026 01:40:43 GMT

@rms1954, your post is concerning. I think you need to find someone you trust that you can talk to.

I think @rockygems123 gave good advise to look for a grief counseling group. Sometimes there are hospitals, libraries, spiritual institutions that sponsor these groups.

Take care of yourself.

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is

Etoile308 — Tue, 13 Jan 2026 01:43:56 GMT

I've been known to say that what use to be labors of love have now become just labor.

My secret to lessen the chore is to break it down into one little task at a time. Take breaks often.

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is

on the bay — Tue, 13 Jan 2026 01:53:48 GMT

I'm so sorry @rms1954!

I know many of us, maybe some of us have felt this way because of grief and yours losing a son? I just know a mother always hopes it will never happen! My heart breaks for you!

There is a way to live, to feel your son where he is now and how he would want you to be happy, that is how you will feel him in your heart-to live, for him and yourself on earth-to honor him with your life living for yourself and him the best way you can.

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is

wagirl — Tue, 13 Jan 2026 15:57:14 GMT

Same with me. My issue is that I have a closet sized kitchen with very little area on the countertop and then there is a washer/dryer at one end--HATE that---live in an apartment now so no big surprise-----but no storage space and no prep space. Me and DD can't be in there at once without bumping into each other. The new place we are moving into--has a very nice kitchen space--tons of cabinets and storage with all brand new applianes. Maybe I will get my cooking mojo back---but am pretty much done with my entertaining days--I am content to be asked to bring an item and then more often than not, I will buy it.