assistance with finding therapist... - Page 2

ECBG · ‎01-08-2011

I totally agree with John. I was signed on as "family" for students that had drug abuse issues and put on hospital lock down drug units.

There is a difference although a family threapist is good, a drug abuse counselor is fantastic!

Nuttmeg · ‎03-09-2010

@Mom2Dogs wrote:
She has a new baby, about 1 year, and told me today that she has been crying a lot, that is when I told her to find a therapist....her ex is a piece of work.

This is a second marriage for her, she has married a really great guy....this time he is very supportive but she is having trouble coping with her older son's drug use....we all had such high hopes...

Please suggest to your family member to call her insurance company. They have a unit that handles mental health referrals. Please have her husband call ASAP. It would be a shame, if she ends up going to the ER.

Snowpuppy · ‎03-09-2010

You cannot fix another person, you can only fix yourself.

There was an old Al Anon saying: you can see what it's doing to them, but can you see what it's doing to you? If she can find an Al-anon meeting, she should at least give it a try for her own sake. They don't take issue with the drug of choice, it's all a drug.

Counseling someone while they're using is like talking to a brick wall.

Mom2Dogs · ‎03-09-2010

@Snowpuppy wrote:
You cannot fix another person, you can only fix yourself.

There was an old Al Anon saying: you can see what it's doing to them, but can you see what it's doing to you? If she can find an Al-anon meeting, she should at least give it a try for her own sake. They don't take issue with the drug of choice, it's all a drug.

Counseling someone while they're using is like talking to a brick wall.

@Snowpuppy...that is pretty much what I told her....it's his life. She needs to concentrate on her self....I don't want to hound her about therapy, it was just yesterday that we had the conversation...I want to call her next week to see if she has made an appointment but I don't want to butt in either.......

Mom2Dogs · ‎03-09-2010

@hckynut, he might end up in jail with a lengthy sentence....maybe then he will clean up his act. His first offense was 60 day in treatment...it was a good, local program, he did well, got out, had a job, car, etc. He probably did not change is friends.

The system gave him a bit of slack the first time because he was such a good kid, had good grades in school...this time he will not be so lucky.

esmeraldagooch · ‎03-10-2010

@Mom2Dogs wrote:
My niece's son who was using drugs, got clean, had a job, car...... but sadly was picked up again for using. Currently he is in jail, his dad and grandparents are going to bail him out of jail, sigh.

My niece does not enable him but his father, and grandparents do. Parents have not been together for years.

I told her she needs to find someone to talk to, do you think she needs a therapist who works with parents of children that do drugs or would a 'traditional' therapist be OK? Thanks!

That may be great but alanon may be a better option. It's free and she will have support of others in her spot.

software · ‎06-08-2016

She needs to talk to her son.

It seems the father & grandparents are blocking her out, that her voice means nothing.

Since he's bailed out, that means a court case is pending. She needs to stand with her son, talk to him, work with him as he deals with these consequences. If he gets sent to drug counseling or even jail, she needs to find out what her role can be.

Courts & police are faced with this every day, I would suggest she work with the system & keep her son close. Usually the police understand what the parents are going through & will give the addict consideration if the family stays close and involved.

The son probably needs some jail time as hard as that is to accept. But he has to accept consequences. At least she'll know where he is and hopefully sober.

Just MHO

@Mom2Dogs

Snowpuppy · ‎03-09-2010

AlAnon is free but they do take an offering to cover their meager expenses.

Some meetings have babysitting. Usually covered by their offering basket. Call the local AA or AlAnon office to locate a meeting.

She can remain annonymous with only a first name. If she asks for a phone number for someone to call, someone will offer. Each group has their own 'flavor'. If she doesn't like one, she can attend another.

In her situation, sometimes a crisis moment can't wait for a therapist appointment

conlt · ‎03-16-2010

My best friends son was on drugs, still is most likely. He has been in jail multiple times. She always bailed him out. The last count I have is she had spent about $80,000 on rehab and attorneys for him. Her husband of 27 years wanted to not support their son, who was in his mid 20's at the time. They ended up getting divorced. The husband has found someone else now and is very happy. My friend is still stuck in the dysfunctional world of her son. It is very sad. It is difficult to chose but I think the addict has to be abandoned or seemingly so for he or she to realized that they have to stop the behaviors that they are doing.