Community Chat

[Cakers1]

On 4/5/2014 Jules5280 said:

On 4/5/2014 serenity4ever said:

Ford, that's a very tough question. It happened to us years ago on a brand new car and we didn't report the accident because we were afraid that the kid would have higher insurance rates for years to come. The damage was fairly expensive to fix but at the time it seemed like the right thing to do...

All you taught that kid was that he doesn't have to be accountable in life when he makes mistakes. Not the right thing to do in my opinion.

Agree. Accidents happen. I would also contact the parents to see how this will be handled. If the parents want to pay out of pocket, that's fine. They can decide how the son will pay them back, if they want to do so.

Just make sure you get more than one estimate in writing and I would also be careful if the parents "know" somebody in body work. That doesn't always come out well.

And get it in writing. If they don't want to put it in writing, then just go to the insurance company and let the young man pay the higher premium.

A lesson learned for him - he's young, it's not a major crisis in terms of any bodily harm, but he has to take responsibility.

[LilacTree]

The owner of the car did not call the police, she called the parents. The parents told her to get and appraisal and then they would get together and decide what to do. The owner of the car did get two appraisals, both similar, about $2,000. She then called the parents and they said they would think about it and get back to her. Weeks went by, no word.

In the meantime, owner of the car gets sick and, since the car is still drivable, does nothing for several more weeks. When asked, son's friend doesn't know what's going on.

I recommend that the car owner call the insurance company directly and file a claim. Son is upset about this because it's his friend. Car owner is afraid parents will deny their son did it and doesn't want to face a negative situation that might break up her son's friendship.

So two choices . . . car doesn't get fixed or car owner pays for repair and forgets about it.

I insist that insurance company be called and claim filed as soon as possible. Of course, as you may have guessed, the car owner is my daughter. She cannot afford the repairs.

Do I just stay out of this?

[brii]

Ford, your daughter shouldn't be on the hook for the repairs.

She should definitely call the insurance company and let them handle repairs and any other legal matters.

[Cakers1]

Ford: Too much time is passing. She needs to call the insurance company now and forget trying to deal with this with the parents. If this young man doesn't want to own up to his responsibility, your daughter hasn't lost a thing with him.

[serenity4ever]

On 4/5/2014 Cakers1 said:

On 4/5/2014 Jules5280 said:

On 4/5/2014 serenity4ever said:

Ford, that's a very tough question. It happened to us years ago on a brand new car and we didn't report the accident because we were afraid that the kid would have higher insurance rates for years to come. The damage was fairly expensive to fix but at the time it seemed like the right thing to do...

All you taught that kid was that he doesn't have to be accountable in life when he makes mistakes. Not the right thing to do in my opinion.

Agree. Accidents happen. I would also contact the parents to see how this will be handled. If the parents want to pay out of pocket, that's fine. They can decide how the son will pay them back, if they want to do so.

Just make sure you get more than one estimate in writing and I would also be careful if the parents "know" somebody in body work. That doesn't always come out well.

And get it in writing. If they don't want to put it in writing, then just go to the insurance company and let the young man pay the higher premium.

A lesson learned for him - he's young, it's not a major crisis in terms of any bodily harm, but he has to take responsibility.

He was in foster care. He saved his money to buy the car, have insurance and had a job after school where he still continued to achieve honor grades. At the time I felt the accident was due to a lack of sleep from working so much...

He won scholarships to many schools and put himself through grad school. He now works as an attorney in legal aid. He is giving back and I am very proud of him.

If it happened today, I would probably do the exact same thing...

[Cakers1]

She should also email/text both him and his parents stating that the insurance company will be notified since she has not heard back from them on settling this outside the insurance company.

Be specific with dates; nobody is going to email/text somebody and say you haven't responded to us on how to settle this problem without just cause.

At this point the parents are letting him get away with causing damage. Not a good lesson for him.

[JustJules]

On 4/5/2014 Ford1224 said:

The owner of the car did not call the police, she called the parents. The parents told her to get and appraisal and then they would get together and decide what to do. The owner of the car did get two appraisals, both similar, about $2,000. She then called the parents and they said they would think about it and get back to her. Weeks went by, no word.

In the meantime, owner of the car gets sick and, since the car is still drivable, does nothing for several more weeks. When asked, son's friend doesn't know what's going on.

I recommend that the car owner call the insurance company directly and file a claim. Son is upset about this because it's his friend. Car owner is afraid parents will deny their son did it and doesn't want to face a negative situation that might break up her son's friendship.

So two choices . . . car doesn't get fixed or car owner pays for repair and forgets about it.

I insist that insurance company be called and claim filed as soon as possible. Of course, as you may have guessed, the car owner is my daughter. She cannot afford the repairs.

Do I just stay out of this?

Sounds like the parents are hoping this situation will just go away because of their son's relationship, and they aren't taking responsibility. It's never too late to contact the insurance company and file a claim. Hopefully pictures were taken at the time of the accident, but the owner's insurance company works on their behalf (I am assuming the owner of this car is a friend or acquaintance of yours?)

Whether or not you should stay out of it depends on how well you know this person. You clearly are looking out for their best interests. It would never hurt to "encourage" them to still file a claim with their Insurance company, get the damage fixed and let the Insurance company pursue reimbursement from the other insurance company. As for damaging any friendship...that is for the two boys to work out, but it seems if his friend isn't concerned about making compensation for damaging his friend's parents car, then he isn't a very good friend to have. Whatever emotions are involved doesn't change the law. The boy caused damage to property, and is liable for it, or his parents are depending on his age.

In my opinion, they definitely need to inform their insurance company, even if they have no intent of getting it fixed. If something happens again to the car in the future and that damage is determined to be pre-existing, it won't be covered. Just because they report it to their insurance company (which should even give them an estimate for repairs), doesn't mean they need to have it repaired.

ETA: I missed the part that the car owner is your daughter. She should definitely call her insurance company, and as Cakers suggested, make as much documentation as possible of times and dates, and notifying the parents.

[serenity4ever]

On 4/5/2014 Ford1224 said:

The owner of the car did not call the police, she called the parents. The parents told her to get and appraisal and then they would get together and decide what to do. The owner of the car did get two appraisals, both similar, about $2,000. She then called the parents and they said they would think about it and get back to her. Weeks went by, no word.

In the meantime, owner of the car gets sick and, since the car is still drivable, does nothing for several more weeks. When asked, son's friend doesn't know what's going on.

I recommend that the car owner call the insurance company directly and file a claim. Son is upset about this because it's his friend. Car owner is afraid parents will deny their son did it and doesn't want to face a negative situation that might break up her son's friendship.

So two choices . . . car doesn't get fixed or car owner pays for repair and forgets about it.

I insist that insurance company be called and claim filed as soon as possible. Of course, as you may have guessed, the car owner is my daughter. She cannot afford the repairs.

Do I just stay out of this?

Ford, give your opinion of what you think should be done but beyond that, it is still up to your daughter. It isn't going to be an easy decision for your daughter because she is probably worried about alienating her son if she does call the insurance company.

[azterry!]

I agree that too much time has passed.

She can turn the claim into her own insurance carrier. They will pay for the damage if your daughter carries collision coverage. She will have to pay her deductible, but then the insurance company will go after the boy/his insurance carrier for reimbursement. This is called subrogation.

If your daughter knows the name of the boy's insurance company, she can contact them directly. You don't need the boy's permission to put in a claim to his company

[kdgn]

On 4/5/2014 Jules5280 said:

On 4/5/2014 serenity4ever said:

Ford, that's a very tough question. It happened to us years ago on a brand new car and we didn't report the accident because we were afraid that the kid would have higher insurance rates for years to come. The damage was fairly expensive to fix but at the time it seemed like the right thing to do...

All you taught that kid was that he doesn't have to be accountable in life when he makes mistakes. Not the right thing to do in my opinion.

I disagree, Jules. What they taught the kid was that there are compassionate, thoughtful people in life. What his parents taught him about the consequences of his actions is a different story.

If both sets of parents discuss it and decide to take care of it privately rather than report it, I don't see a problem with it. Adults who have minor fender-benders do this all the time. If it's an expensive fix that can't be paid for out of pocket, insurance companies are notified.