Community Chat

[LilacTree]

More and more folks are doing this.  My LBI daughter and I were talking about it (neither of us get upset talking about my eventual demise).  She is my executor and POA, so we discuss things sometimes. 

She told me that a friend told her about a relative who wrote his own obituary in a comedic way, that he had always been a joker, and he wanted to "get some things off his chest."  She said it was hilariously funny and everyone enjoyed it. 

Then we started talking about what I would want said and I told her I would just write it for her.  Which I did.  It is in draft form to allow for changes that may happen in the intervening years.  But it did not upset her and it does not upset me. 

I googled it and found there are many articles about how to write an obituary including your own. 

Your thoughts?

[NickNack]

My mother died in 2000 and had written her Obituary.  She had written it that early because she had breast cancer that had already recurred once.  It made that part of it very easy, and we all appreciated that it was ready.  

[Vivian]

If I were of sound mind and had the time to write about my life, I'd do it. 

[violann]

There is apparently no editor in charge of obituaries for our local paper, and some of them are really poorly done. 

Does anyone besides me remember the distinction between "death notice" and "obituary"?

 I miss the standard inclusions of schools attended, places worked, names of relatives and other such connections.

Especially in the case of women who go by their husband's surnames, it can be very hard to figure out whether you knew someone fifty years ago or didn't.

[LilacTree]

@Vivian

It is kinda like writing an outline of your autobiography.  I have hundreds of journal entries in my cyber diary (Word) that I have been writing since the early 90s.  I have no idea who would ever read them . . . someday I may start reading them myself!

I was always truthful, whether it was a good day or a bad day, whether I was happy, sad, or upset, I wrote truthfully, and it wasn't always flattering to my loved ones.  But I figured what good is it if I edit it to be all roses and sunshine?  That wouldn't have reflected my life.

Anyway, my obit includes only one autobiographical paragraph . . . and it was kinda fun actually!! 

[chickenbutt]

I kinda always thought that the obit was from the hearts of others but, hey, it's your funeral!     Seriously, if people want to do that - more power to them.

I won't, as I've already requested no funeral or any of that.  Donate what is useful and, for all I care, throw the rest in the trash and move on.   I guess you can't do that, so cremation, then throw away the ashes, is probably the only other choice.  Or just don't claim the body and that way there is no cost.   I don't care at all.   That's what works for me, though.  I don't begrudge others their choices, of course.

[LilacTree]

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@chickenbutt wrote:

I kinda always thought that the obit was from the hearts of others but, hey, it's your funeral!     Seriously, if people want to do that - more power to them.

I won't, as I've already requested no funeral or any of that.  Donate what is useful and, for all I care, throw the rest in the trash and move on.   I guess you can't do that, so cremation, then throw away the ashes, is probably the only other choice.  Or just don't claim the body and that way there is no cost.   I don't care at all.   That's what works for me, though.  I don't begrudge others their choices, of course.

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@chickenbutt

I won't be having a funeral either, no religious services, we all have opted for cremation in our family, but if they want to have a memorial gathering, that is up to them.

[gidgetgh]

My aunt passed away in late 2014. She wrote her own obituary. 

I wrote the obituary for both my mom and my dad. Neither wanted any sort of service so I wrote a lengthy obituary for each. 

[granny me]

My husband and I will have no obit, no funeral, no fanfare whatsoever. We have one daughter and no other family; we are private people. We will be creamated and whomever goes first will go with daughter to scatter ashes and grieve in private. 

My mom wanted a marching band, parade and a line as long as the eye could see behind her hearse we used to joke we would hire to people. Dad was a police officer and had a military funeral, there were so many people, people we  didn't even know. It was just too much for me. But everyone is different.

[seaBreeze]

Writing your own obit is very RESPONSIBLE.   During this sad time, can loved ones remember details of your college, workplaces, or your wishes for flowers or contributions to a non-profit.  I wrote mine and expect to be here another 30 years on this earth (or perhaps tomorrow--one never knows~!)