Re: What is it with Hollywood dads and their nanni... - Page 5

AliJoi5 · ‎03-10-2010

Thanks @MyShadowLove, I enjoyed your post as well! And I agree, human nature is complicated, and that's why we find it so compelling... in addition to the fact that we also have somewhat of a vested interest in the matter. lol I kind of look at these stories, celebrity or not, as microcosms of the bigger picture. Like studying a lion pride out in the wild! And if I'm understanding you correctly, what you're touching on is nature v. nurture, and all of the infinite combinations of the two. No two people have that exact same make up or life experiences, and so no two people will respond in the same way, and for the same reasons, to any given situation. So to make generalizations, as I did, is of course sophomoric. But I think deeply rooted instinct plays a much bigger role in the human experience than one might like to admit, good or bad, no matter how well we've managed to mask it with this cloak of modern civility. And, IMO, infidelity is just one aspect of that. I haven't yet decided whether that belief says good or bad things about me. lol

Well, now my brain hurts. I love these discussions though!

Mrsq2022 · ‎03-10-2010

I think that there is a very dangerous dynamic with these nannies. Imagine you living at home happily with your husband and children. Imagine a very attractive man living with your family 24/7. He has breakfast with you, lunch, dinner on nights when your husband is away. He is charming, caring, loving... He flatters you and complements you with every turn. You two have fun together, take your kids out on outings like a little "family" when your husband is away. He is alone with you for long stretches while your husband is away. This "relationship" goes on for months, even years...I think that these affairs are almost inevitable given the environment these celebrities put themselves into. Add in the stress of two working professionals who both travel a lot and don't spend as much time together as a "typical couple" would.

It doesn't happen with male nannies because no one hires a male nanny, but these young female nannies are constantly around and stroking these men's egos, flattering them, flirting, DYING to do anything within their powers to charm these male celebrities away from their wives. They are young with nothing to lose...stealing these men from their wives may be their front and center goal 24/7....

MyShadowLove · ‎01-05-2015

@AliJoi5 wrote:
Thanks @MyShadowLove, I enjoyed your post as well! And I agree, human nature is complicated, and that's why we find it so compelling... in addition to the fact that we also have somewhat of a vested interest in the matter. lol I kind of look at these stories, celebrity or not, as microcosms of the bigger picture. Like studying a lion pride out in the wild! And if I'm understanding you correctly, what you're touching on is nature v. nurture, and all of the infinite combinations of the two. No two people have that exact same make up or life experiences, and so no two people will respond in the same way, and for the same reasons, to any given situation. So to make generalizations, as I did, is of course sophomoric. But I think deeply rooted instinct plays a much bigger role in the human experience than one might like to admit, good or bad, no matter how well we've managed to mask it with this cloak of modern civility. And, IMO, infidelity is just one aspect of that. I haven't yet decided whether that belief says good or bad things about me. lol

Well, now my brain hurts. I love these discussions though!

********************

@AliJoi5...Yes, exactly!...You are very articulate and expressed it so much better than I could, and I couldn't agree more with the part that I highlighted also...very well stated!...I could clarify my feelings more regarding this, but I will just add that I feel very strongly that our society has created such high expectations of love and relationships and also such strict limitations within those relationships which can actually be very stifling to our natural human spirit/ behavior/instincts and this is what causes such disruption in the cycle of our lives.

Now, my brain hurts also...lol...but it's been a great discussion!

~~Formerly known as "WildFlowers"~~

AliJoi5 · ‎03-10-2010

@MyShadowLove wrote:

@AliJoi5...Yes, exactly!...You are very articulate and expressed it so much better than I could, and I couldn't agree more with the part that I highlighted also...very well stated!...I could clarify my feelings more regarding this, but I will just add that I feel very strongly that our society has created such high expectations of love and relationships and also such strict limitations within those relationships which can actually be very stifling to our natural human spirit/ behavior/instincts and this is what causes such disruption in the cycle of our lives.

Now, my brain hurts also...lol...but it's been a great discussion!

Wow, I've been saying that for years @MyShadowLove! I don't think any previous generations had to process the daily assault on our ideals that we are experiencing now. And I'm not speaking politically... this has nothing to do with conservative v. liberal (for me, anyway). I'm talking about this unattainable fairytale we're all being sold, and it's having the exact opposite effect... it's killing romance! I don't know how anyone gets together anymore. Do you know how many young girls I know who are modeling their social lives around "Kim and Kanye?" And I mean, they're not just fans; they actually have certain expectations! I knew we were really in trouble when middle-aged soccer moms were reading Twilight and fantasizing about "Bella and Edward," as they complained about their husbands. I thought... oh boy... we've got problems! And it's not just women either. Again, I'm generalizing of course, but... I'm not sure the things that satisfied men in the past are satisfying them today. In the age of reality TV, things have become distinctly unreal. Our expectations (and our egos) are out of control!

When I was becoming a young woman, S*x and the City was all the rage. And everybody worshipped Carrie and Big, including myself. I'm not sure if you're familiar with the show? To make a long story short, Big, who has been a terrible boyfriend, leaves Carrie, heartbroken and destroyed, for another woman (a model, no less). Eventually, in later seasons (and the movies that followed), he comes back, confesses his undying love for her, they marry, live happily ever after, and he becomes the perfect husband. Everyone wanted to be Carrie, and everyone wanted Big. My point is, I later learned that Candace Bushnell, who wrote book, mentioned some years later in an interview that in real life, her Big left her for the model and never came back. I remember thinking, ah, now that makes more sense. And it's just a show/movie, yes! But I'm not sure younger generations are able to distinguish between the two anymore. And with today's youth obsessed culture, they're running the show. I'm scared for them (and a little bit for myself too)!

Miranda1550 · ‎01-20-2013

Opportunity......................it is easy...................they are right there.

Plaid Pants2 · ‎03-14-2015

@MyShadowLove wrote:
@AliJoi5...Very interesting analysis!...I have also been fascinated by human nature and relationships and thought that I would love to enter the field of psychology...I was in my 20's at the time and started taking courses in psychology and got a job as a psychiatric aide...However, after a couple of years in this field, my desire waned and I ended up in a different career....It was a very fascinating experience!

I love these types of discussions and found your post to be very astute and insightful.

However, it can also be viewed as a generalization for all men...or for all women...and, so, what I find equally fascinating is the many different ways in which each person reacts or responds to those tests and challenges in their relationships...Each of us has our very own, unique, personal blueprint...upbringing, character, morals, values, society's pressures, our own ideals, etc...and we all respond in ways which are a result of all of these qualities.

I think I'm losing myself a little here...LOL...as is easy to do when discussing human nature, which is very complex and hard to simplify.

I enjoyed reading everyone's various perspectives very much!

Ding! Ding! Ding! It's never good to generalize.

Not all nannies are out to bed the dude, and not all men are going to sleep with the nanny.

AliJoi5 · ‎03-10-2010

@Plaid Pants2 wrote:
Ding! Ding! Ding! It's never good to generalize.

Not all nannies are out to bed the dude, and not all men are going to sleep with the nanny.

Agreed, but I think that kind of goes without saying. Clearly we're not speaking in terms of every single man and every single woman in that position, at least I'm not. I'm referring only to those who do engage in that behavior. Also, wildflowers and I were discussing generalizations with regard to the "why," not with regard to the "who." I think it's interesting to ask "why," especially as it concerns human nature, however simple or complicated the answers may be. It's possible to look at the big picture without generalizing.

DiAnne · ‎09-22-2010

My very attractive younger sister worked as a nanny in LA while attending USC. She quit three jobs because of unwanted advances of the husband. A lot of nannies are college students and I do not think they are interested in seducing an "old" man.