Community Chat

[JBKO]

This is meant to be a serious question. I haven't dated much at all. I've been lucky I guess because the males I have encountered have been gentlemen and not pressured me to do anything I don't want before I am ready. Unlucky for me I was not into them.  Honestly, I am old-fashioned and don't want things to escalate to a seksual relationship for well--months. I had a friend who told me he was out if there was no action by the third date. What should I expect nowadays?

[Plaid Pants2]

Do I think that a woman should put out before she is ready? 

No, I don't.

But, at the same time, I think that any man will be patient for only so long.

I mean, if a woman isn't even going to kiss the guy until they are married, then I think that is asking for too much from the man.

As they say, men have needs, and if one woman isn't fulfilling those needs, he will look elsewhere.

That said, a good man will wait, but even a good man patience will run out eventually.

[ROMARY]

A hundred years or so ago, (lol) I found that high school and a bit older boys/young men were very respectful.  True, they probably cheated, but they were very respectful to their girlfriends, more or less.  Many married them and have stayed married.  Of course, that was then and now is now.

[NoelSeven]

You are bound to come across a lot of jerks.  If they expect something of you, be glad you found out what the guy was made of.

Set your own standards and stick to them.  Don't do anything you don't want to do.

Try church singles groups.  I would hope there would be more traditional men there, but maybe not.  Just don't let it get to you.

Another way is to ask friends if they know any nice guys.

[NoelSeven]

ps If it was me, I'd go dutch, pay my own way.

That way, no man can say you owe him for the dinner.

[Irshgrl31201]

I think this cannot be answered because every person has different expectations and ideas for how long they will wait.

I do think this should be something discussed with the person you are dating up front and at the beginning. That way you can let him know up front and you won't be wasting each others time.

I think the right person for you will wait but having said that every person has their time limit.

Are you saying that you want to wait until marriage until you do anything seksual? If that is how you feel that is fine but there are guys out there that won't wait for that. You have to find a guy who shares the same morals as you do. I personally would have never waited until marriage because that is something I want to find out about BEFORE I got married and I personally want to make sure all the parts are in working order, if you know what I mean...lolz!

[JBKO]

Hey Irshgrl... lol i forget the rest! How are you? You remember me?

[JBKO]

Spoiler

Yikes NoelSeven! Is that how it is? You can't even expect a nice meal without having to put out. Wow.

[NoelSeven]

DD, For sure there are men who think that way and will say so if the woman says no.

Pay your own way, avoid the baloney.

[Snowpuppy]

You're going to find different "expectations" with each guy you meet.

What are your intentions? Are you ready for marriage? Family? Got your own GirlSelf together if you are serious? Have you asked yourself what YOU have to offer a man?

The days of a girl having that certain "somethin' somethin'" is long gone. It's so plentiful it's ridiculous. If that's all a guy wants he can speed dial and move on to the next female in an hour.

Personally, I avoid that whole church thing. A LOT of ppl are in church for all the wrong reasons. And the top wrong reason is a hook up. Not marriage, a hook up.

Be up front with your own expectations. A man is never going to treat you better than in the beginning. Tell him what you're looking for and what you have to offer in return. Good luck, girl!