Community Chat

[Tinkrbl44]

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@DiscountDiva wrote:
Are there really parents who are ok with their 13, 14, 15 year old engaging in relations so long as they use protection? Call me old-fashioned but even if I consider myself a realistic person and one who believes people(especially women) should get the most out of life, children should be children. You have your whole life ahead of you. I remember listening to a mom talk about how her 15 year-old was active and she seemed so powerless to me. Like she didn't have influence in her child's life. If you are doing well in school, playing sports, performing in plays, have both parents in your life, you are not going to have it on your mind. What do you think of "they're going to do it anyway" mentality? I am not saying to wait until marriage since people get married later and later, but 14?? What do you think?

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They won't have it on their mind?   Where did you get that idea from?  

Whether they are waiting a few more years, or actively engaging, it's on teenagers' minds!

[KarenQVC]

I think 16 is as old as we can hope for.  These days 18 would be a miracle.

[Mz iMac]

In this day & age, the problem stems from babies having babies.  Which results in grandparents who are in their 30's & great grands who are in their late 40's to early 50's.

That being said......

@JBKO

Your statement in part, "If you are doing well in school, playing sports, performing inplays, have both parents in your life, you are not going to have it on your mind."

I would appreciate if you can explain how if having a single parent, teenagers will always have relations on their minds.

[Kachina624]

Such parents are ignorant and too lazy to properly supervise and direct their children.   I can't think of enough words that are acceptable here to describe my contempt. 

[Pook]

Many of today's parents are so concerned about their own lives to be real parents to their children.  If it's assumed that all teens are going to do it then they probaably will.  I know many of my friends' teens who are not wanting to do it until they are more mature.  I think the problem is parents allowing their kids to enter into relationships where they are always with thier boyfriends and girlfriends.  If they are not permitted to hang out with each other alone so much it won't be just assumed that they will be having se$.  

[Nataliesgramma]

Parents want to be "friends" with their kids instead of parents......

[Hayfield]

I think that being a parent and raising a child to be a productive, contributing member of society is the most difficult thing a person can do and unfortunately there are too many people today who are just "not up to the task" and  have children "without thinking".   When you have a child it changes your whole life and when you do it "without thinking", not only  does that child suffer but so does society.  By the time I raised my two children got them educated and "launched" them I was exhausted and I had a husband who earned a good living and was a great dad.  I was lucky that I didn't have to work full time and was able to totally concentrate on raising them.  I don't know how single parents do it today but I have seen many single parents do a great job and I've seen two working parents do a great job also. 

[bonnielu]

First of all I am not okay with this.  You mention PROTECTION.  I broaden that word.. not just to avoid pregnancy and disease but to avoid  self degregation, heart break, lack of common decency and what ever stretches that word.  

I raised four daughters, amazing young women, striving in life to be helpmates and be a light in the darkness inspiring others to succeed.  

And personally I can't even tell  you how many OPPORTUNITIES I turned down because I value ME. And so far I have lived to celebrate it and feel important about my decisions.  

[Mominohio]

Having a 19 year old son, I can tell you that even the best parenting (supervision, values imparted, wisdom imparted, keeping them involved in jobs, sports, academics, good communication, etc.) the world out there is telling kids that it is ok to be active, even at very young ages.

Combine the hormones that rage at this age, with the music and entertainment industry and what they market to teens (think the Twilight saga), social media and who 'we' as a society make important and relevant (think the Kardashians) and it makes it very hard for kids to see it as anything but 'normal'. As a parent today, you feel like you are battling the entire world to get your kid raised, safe and effectively, sometimes.

To answer the OP, yes, there are those parents out there who are essentially OK with it. I saw the parents of many girls in our rural area that spent most of high school pushing their daughters to hook up with the 'right' young man, hoping they would be married shortly after high school, and starting on those grandbabies. I always felt that I had to protect my son in the same way we traditionally have felt girls needed to be 'protected' from boys. 

[Carmie]

I will probably get be  bashed for this, but I am gonna say it anyway.

As with any and all animals, most humans are wired to procreate.  We develop feelings and strong urges for this.  We don't have a choice in how we feel or in our attractions.

Throughout history, society/religion has tried to curb these feelings telling us that it is wrong, or a sin, only for marriage, should only be done in the dark, etc.

After thousands of years, it's still not working.  Hormones are still winning.  I think we should teach responsibility to our children.  We as humans can control our actions but not our feelings.

For most young people, once you are active, it is vey difficult to stop.  It is responsible to educate our younger members to take precautions.

As much as we try, we are never gonna win this battle. Our children are maturing at very early ages.  It is not all that unusual for 10 year old girls to have their period.