Re: Mother Of Columbine Killer Breaks Silence

segrl21 · ‎05-22-2010

@Irshgrl31201 wrote:
@segrl21 wrote:
Read an excellent book called Columbine by Cullen. Much of what the media told us was false or exaggerated. He read the boys diaries and watched their many videos taping themselves. Got to the bottom of the actual story. The parents were unaware of what their sons were doing. The weapons didn't come from parents homes. They had friends, very popular, made good grades, had girlfriends (one who actually bought the guns), both were manipulative and covered their tracks well. They weren't bullied, in fact were popular especially in their own circle. They manipulated their parents, teachers, friends and community. Eric was the "louder" of the two, Dylan quiet & artsy. Dylan came off as a victim of Eric but in reality he was just as sociopathic as Eric. It was a fascinating book to read because it displaced the many myths built around the actual story. It made me emphasize with the parents. Really feel for their parents not only did their children become killers, they had too still grieve a child being lost.
I do agree with a lot of what you said but it is substantiated by many source they were very bullied and there was a pretty severe culture of bullying at that school. People who even associated with them were bullied.

http://www.alternet.org/story/24801/excerpt%3A_the_scene_of_the_crime_was_the_cause_of_the_crime

There was also an incident where Dylan was pelted with ketchup covered tampons when he walked into the commons for all to see.

The upper classman would oil the floors and then throw kids into the oil and they would slide knocking down others.

http://www.westword.com/news/forgiving-my-columbine-high-school-friend-dylan-klebold-5834485

There was definite bullying at the school for sure not saying there wasn't any bullying. Some of classmates have wrote books about it but their bullying was here an there versus consistent. At some points they were the bullies. Eric himself got in trouble for busting in a windshield of a classmate, he was a known bully. Made death threats. Dylan especially envied the popular kids and ranted about them. They were bullied but it was made out in the media it was the possible cause but in reality it was a few incidents here and there. Read an article that said the boys were more upset over the culture of bullying at their school versus being bullied...and that is supported by a lot of former students.

esmerelda · ‎03-10-2010

Not AS safe. Safe enough they still send them.

*********************
Keepin' it real.

60sgirl · ‎11-24-2014

@esmerelda wrote:
Not AS safe. Safe enough they still send them.

they have no choice, not everyone can get home schooled. But I'm sure every parent has a lump in their throat if they get a call that their kids school is on lockdown.

I'm done with P.C. Just say what you mean and mean what you say. It's easier.

qvcfreak · ‎03-10-2010

Mom used to always say, I know my kids here at home and when with me. But once they're out the door, I can only pray they behave and follow the rules. She was right, we all did things without permission. Asked to go here and we went there or left cruising with others when we weren't allowed. We were lucky nothing ever happened to us. I would never blame the parents.

Frosted Cake · ‎02-01-2016

A friend of mine has a grandson with special needs. When his mother interviewed a private school in her city that specializes in children with needs, she was shocked that they had no security in place. The school is K-12. There was no security plan and children could enter the Administration area with no supervision.

The school is situated on a quiet street across from a cemetery, so it is very obscure to the public.

She said they had one security guard, no nurse or anyone trained as a nurse, apparently the receptionist had to help kids who fell or needed medical care. She was surprised in this day and age that they were so lackadaisical about security. Many of the kids going there have ADHD, Autism and other behavioral issues.

She had to laugh, the executive director came to the tour/interview dressed like a high school student, leggings, demim short skirt, jean vest and knee high boots. She said it was in bad taste to greet potential students that way since tuition is $20,000/year and she didn't represent herself very professionally.

While in the waiting area, a little boy came into Admin and told them that he didn't know where the class went and didn't know what to do. She thought how odd that a teacher wouldn't realize that a student was missing.

Needless to say, her grandson did not enroll in that school. She was too afraid to have him attend a school with no safety in place for the students.

chickenbutt · ‎03-09-2010

Almost every parent I've known has said that they KNEW everything that was going on in their kids' lives. Of those, every one found out after the kids were grown that there was all kinds of stuff going on of which they had absolutely no idea. Some never find out.

It may not have risen to the degree of mass murder but it's amazing how many people can sit up there (wherever they have placed themselves) and say that these parents were lousy parents.

I just don't think this is a place for self-righteousness - but then when is it!

It sounds like the other kid was truly sociopathic and anti-social on a psychopathic level. It kind of sounds like Dylan was depressed and struggling, which made him vulnerable to the influence of Eric, with whom he had been friends since they were very young.

I'm not excusing EITHER kid. They became murders. That's set in stone. But whenever I hear the kind of stuff like 'how could they not have known?', 'they should have known', 'I would have known'. That's just way far reaching beyond the realm of realistic thinking.

Dylan was a pretty smart kid. You can hide stuff. It's not difficult at all to hide stuff, especially depression and negative thoughts. A smart kid/adult can hide all kinds of deviations with great success and nobody would ever know. This I know to be true.

ladyroxanne · ‎03-09-2010

@chickenbutt

very well said

Laura14 · ‎06-09-2014

I guess I'm the only one who felt that she really still seemed not to get it. I think she is still in shock or denial. There were tissues but no tears. She just didn't come across as genuine to me. I honestly think she can't even begin to grapple with what her son did and doesn't even know where to start to understand it so she's just going through the expected motions of living. I felt very disappointed for her with her lack of insight into what anyone more could have done. I don't blame her one bit but I would still wonder more than she seems to. Not a criticism. I think it's still shock.

Frosted Cake · ‎02-01-2016

I was glad that she at least is giving the proceeds for the book to a mental health charity. She's not "capitalizing" on it.

She's probably in a deep depression and PTSD too. She lost her son to such horror that he did, her husband and her broke up and she had breast cancer. She's no doubt in denial a bit and living in a horrible place that most of us couldn't fully comprehend.

chickenbutt · ‎03-09-2010

I agree, Cake! How can one navigate herself out of such depths? How can one realize all of it and maintain their own sanity?

I think that any of us can only guess what it's like to have your kid kill a bunch of others and then kill himself. It's a magnitude of such a degree that there is no way.

I think she realizes every bit of it and feels the pain of every bit of it. I just think she's trying to keep her head above water and will always be profoundly affected. I just don't see her as a 'bad guy' as some do. Maybe the fact that I'm non-religious allows me to see things from more of a realistic pov than some. Nobody has told me what to believe, how to think, or who are the good people and who are the bad people. I can feel for everybody involved here, including the parents. The killers - I don't know about that. It's pretty hard to feel for them.